6. Madison
MADISON
I ’ve made a colossal mistake coming here, but I chose the lesser of two evils. At least I hope I did. Castlebrook University looks like a dream on the outside, but as I walk across campus beside Kirsten Lockwood and her friend Winter, the reality is sinking in like a weight in my chest.
I’m going to figure out a plan, try to get a job where no one knows my father in hopes someone might actually hire me. I have very little money, and I’ve never rented something in my name, so finding housing on my own is going to be difficult, but it’s a must. I woke up this morning in a bed, tucked under a soft blanket and my head nestled on pillowcases that probably cost more than everything I own.
I can’t prove it, because the door was still locked from the inside when I tested it out, but I could feel Hayden’s presence, like he’d been in the room for a long time. I shake the thought away because it’s probably just my subconscious wishing it was true as silly as that sounds. I’ve avoided him the entire morning, and I know that can only last for so long. I don’t know if it’s possible to ignore someone who’s made it his life mission to watch me, but I’m going to try.
As we move through the crowded walkways headed toward the dorm I’ll be living in, Kirsten glances over at me and she’s smirking like she’s got one over on me. Her personality seems to have done a complete turn around from the bubbly girl who burst into my work and exclaimed that we were about to become sisters. “Hayden’s losing his mind, you know, because you’re purposefully ignoring him.” I notice her friend Winter looks away, almost like she’s embarrassed, when Kirsten claps her hands excitedly. “It’s my favorite thing that’s happened in a really long time. He never gets upset about anything and you’ve got him actually texting me to find out if you’re with me. Do you know how hard it is to get him to return a text message or pick up a phone call?”
“I really wouldn’t know the first thing about your brother,” I say, but I keep my tone neutral because I don’t need two Lockwoods upset with me. I just keep my gaze fixed forward, trying not to think about the ache that pulls at my chest when I think about the way Hayden looks at me. There’s something between us that I can’t deny. I’ve tried, not very hard, but tried all the same. I know we can’t do anything about it. Not with our parents getting married. I’m not in any place to entertain any sort of relationship, and I suspect that if I give Hayden an inch, he’ll take an entire mile.
As if reading my mind, Kirsten laughs. It’s boisterous and lacks the child-like quality her voice had yesterday. “If you’re worried about the whole stepsibling thing, it’s not like you’re actually related. Hell, Winter grew up with Tristan and they’re…”
Before Kirsten can finish her sentence, Winter brushes her long French braid over her shoulder and interrupts her. “Nothing is going on between Tristan and me,” she says, and even though her words are firm, I catch the flicker of something uncomfortable in her eyes.
Kirsten, of course, laughs again. Maybe I’m just being a bitter Betty because my whole life has been uprooted, but I find her to be loud and obnoxious.
“He just treats you like a boyfriend, huh?” Kirsten asks Winter, but then she’s looking at me like I’m going to side with her on a situation that is none of my business. “We went to dinner last week with our friend Lilac, and Tristan showed up, didn’t speak a word to any of us, paid the bill and then left because she wouldn’t use his credit card.”
Winter’s pale skin flushes pink, and I can tell she’s trying to avoid the subject. “He just feels responsible for me, that’s all. We’ve been through a lot together.” I want to push Kirsten down and roll her into the road so she’ll stop trying to agitate us, but I restrain myself because attempted murder on my first day of school probably isn’t the best look.
Kirsten rolls her eyes at Winter’s quiet protests, but then Winter holds her phone up, showing us the black cracked screen.
“I should probably get going,” Winter says, her voice sounding a little more defensive than it did before Kirsten started in on her about whoever Tristan is. “I was leaving ballet practice and some football players bumped into me and I dropped my phone.”
“You just know Tristan will freak out if he can’t get ahold of you,” Kirsten says, and it almost feels like she’s correcting her, like she’s jealous of whatever Winter has with Tristan.
Winter’s lips purse in what I gather is annoyance before she looks at me, her gaze softening. “I’m glad we met,” she says, and there’s a quiet sincerity in her tone that catches me off guard. “Congrats on making the cheerleading team. I’m sure I’ll see you around, my foster brother is on the hockey team with Hayden.” She gives me a small, encouraging smile before waving and walking off. I guess she assumes I’ll be going to games to watch him, which I won’t, but it’s nice that she wanted to include me.
Kirsten and I keep walking toward my dorm. I can feel her eyes on me, like she’s trying to figure me out. I’m not sure if she’s really trying to help me by showing me around or if this is just some mission from her father, or maybe even Hayden himself. Either way, I’m not in the mood to uncover whatever is going on. I just need to lay as low as possible until I can figure out a plan to be self-sufficient and not living on the street.
“So,” Kirsten starts as she nudges me to cut down a side path that looks like it leads to a cluster of stone buildings I assume are dorms. “Speaking of hockey…you really should try to come to the games. It’s a fun time, and he’ll be on the ice where he can’t bother you.” Her tone is playful now and I hate that I can’t read her and that I feel like I have to play nice.
“Somehow I think your brother could get under my skin even on skates locked behind plexiglass.” My dry tone makes her laugh, and it’s genuine. I think.
“This is you. Your roommate is a real bitch, but if you just avoid her, you’ll be fine. She’s from The Falls, and she’s a real hard ass.” Kirsten says casually, like having a bitchy roommate is no big deal, as we walk up to my dorm.
I’ve never been to The Falls, but I know of it because my father had some gambling debts from that area, betting on bull riders. I decide not to play into what Kirsten is saying and face whoever I’m rooming with head on. My new roommate cannot be worse than the men who frequented the diner.
I reach for the main door of the building to pull it open, but it slams shut with force. I jump back, startled, and then I look up to see a rather perturbed looking guy looming over us. He’s a fucking giant with black hair and deep set eyes. He’s in full hockey gear, but he’s not wearing shoes. Just his socks, as if he’s run here straight from the rink.
I reach into the pocket of my jeans, leaving my hand there, but keeping my fingers on my box cutter. I don’t know who this guy thinks he is, but he clearly thinks he has the right to run up on us like this. My first thought is that Hayden sent him, but my gut tells me that Hayden wouldn’t allow him to shove the door out of my hand like that. Hayden might be intense and confusing but he hasn’t let anyone mistreat me and that’s not something I can say for anyone else I’ve ever known.
Kirsten laughs, a smug grin spreading across her face. “Jeez. Chill out, Tristan,” she says, and then adds, “Looking for your sister?” Tristan completely ignores my existence while he takes two intimidating steps toward Kirsten looking very much like he might do me a favor and throw her in the street himself.
“Where’s Winter?” he demands, his voice low and controlled, standing there looking like he’s ready to tear through the campus if he doesn’t get an answer.
Kirsten reaches up like she’s going to press her hand against his chest in a flirtatious way, but he swats her hand away with a loud smack. “Wow, so polite.”
He doesn’t even flinch. Instead, his eyes narrow, and he growls, “I know she was with the two of you. Where did she go?” If he wasn’t so angry, I’d say he’s panicking by the way his deep voice raises at least an octave on the question.
I feel a rush of nerves as I try to stay calm. I just want him to leave before this whole situation gets worse. I don’t know why Kirsten is fucking with him when she could have easily sent him on his merry way to harass someone else. “Winter left before we turned down this path. She said some football players broke her phone, and she was going to look for you in case you couldn’t get a hold of her,” I say, trying to sound casual.
Tristan glares at both me and then cuts his eyes toward Kirsten as if to let her know he’s not happy with her. Without another word, he turns and starts stomping off toward the main walkway and God fucking help anyone who gets in his way.
Kirsten calls after him, “She said the phone thing was an accident. Don’t go killing off the whole football team. I want to cheer at some games this year.”
Tristan doesn’t falter, instead, he just keeps walking like he’s on a mission.
“Is everyone here this intense?” I ask, and even I can hear the exasperation in my voice. “Is there some sort of psycho aptitude test to get on the hockey team?” I’m being a bitch, but I don’t really care. I swing the door open, but I turn back to Kirsten because she’s got the key card that will give me access to my room.
Kirsten is sporting a grin that can only be described as sarcastic when she says, “No. My ex-boyfriend trafficked me to his friends. So, if you ever get annoyed that Hayden is smothering you with attention, just remember, it could be worse.”
I stop in my tracks, blinking at her. “What?”
She laughs, shrugging her shoulders so I can’t tell if she’s serious. “You should really give my brother a chance. He really likes you.” This is getting weird. Really fucking weird.
“He doesn’t know me,” I say, my voice shaking slightly.
Kirsten raises an eyebrow, obviously amused by my comment. “He probably knows what you had for lunch on a random Tuesday in second grade. Don’t underestimate him when it comes to his obsession with you. He’s never shown an ounce of interest in anyone like this.” She walks inside the building, flashing my key card at me and gesturing for me to follow her.
I’m starting to feel overwhelmed by everything. By Kirsten, by Hayden, by the fact that I’m here at all. I don’t know what I’m doing or what’s expected of me, and none of this feels right. If I’m honest, the only time I have felt any sense of peace was the night of the vigil, alone in the woods with Hayden.
We make it to my room, and as soon as I step inside, I’m struck by the fact that my stuff is already set up. The bed, the new comforter, the pillows, they’re all neatly arranged. I reach out, running my hand over the fabric. It’s soft and familiar in a way that hits me hard. “I used to have a bedspread just like this when I was in middle school,” I say, my voice soft. “It was my favorite.”
Kirsten rubs her fingers across the fabric. “Hayden picked this out for you. All of it.” She gestures toward the light pink vanity and all the makeup that’s stacked on top of it. I assumed it was my roommate’s, because it’s definitely not mine, but then she spills the beans.
“Like I said, my brother knows everything there is about you. He found everything you ever saved on Pinterest and…” she trails off. I’m not even listening to her anymore. I’m looking around the large room, trying to take it all in. One of my favorite things to do is save things on different boards that I’ll never be able to acquire in real life. My account is private, or at least, I thought it was. I don’t know how he did this in such a short time, but I’m in awe at the detail. It’s like my Pinterest account wandered in this room and exploded.
Before I can even think of what to say or explain that I can’t keep any of this stuff, a girl with shoulder-length copper hair walks in, takes one look at Kirsten, and lets out a huff of disdain. Then, her gaze locks onto me, and I can almost feel her sizing me up. “I know how commingled you are with the hockey team,” she says, her voice sharp, not bothering to hide the judgment.
I blink, taken off guard. “I’m not?—”
Kirsten barks out a laugh at my lie. I don’t even have to look at her to know she’s amused that I’m far too tangled up with Hayden to pretend otherwise. The redhead doesn’t say anything, just eyes Kirsten like she’s about to rip her apart with a glare, before the tension breaks when she speaks again.
I see the anger in Kirsten’s eyes when she says, “I have to go.” She waves her hands theatrically like she expects either of us to ask her to stay.
I don’t want to argue, so I just nod, biting my tongue to stop myself from saying anything more. I watch her sashay out the door like she’s never met a problem she couldn’t ignore. Once the door clicks shut behind her, I let out a long breath.
I sit on my new bed, my fingers brushing across the soft comforter. It’s the same one from middle school, the one my grandmother bought me before everything fell apart. The one that was ruined, thrown away in the mess my life became. This isn’t the one I lost, but it’s close enough to make me want to tear up.
My new roommate’s voice breaks my thoughts. She’s standing in the doorway, looking at me, but not with the same judgment she gave to Kirsten. This time, she’s softer. “I’m Chapel Sterling,” she says, walking over and offering a hand.
I shake it, not quite sure what to make of her just yet. “Nice to meet you. I’m Madi Caldwell.” The words feel foreign on my tongue. Everything feels strange.
Chapel raises an eyebrow, the corners of her lips curling into a smirk. “I like to keep to myself. We’ll get along just fine if you don’t bring hockey boys back to this room.”
I can’t help the small laugh that escapes me. “I can assure you that won’t be a problem.”
Chapel’s smirk grows into something that makes me feel like she knows my story. “Oh, don’t give me that. Lockwood’s put out a ‘hands-off mandate’ across campus. Even me, the girl who goes to class, works, and has no friends, has heard about it. You might not be fraternizing with him, but he’s sure as hell is with you. And if he gets his dirty hockey socks anywhere near my stuff, I’ll have his balls in a sling. I don’t care how many abs he has. I’ve wrangled bulls tougher than his pretty ass.”
The words hit me like a punch to the gut. I blink at her, unsure if I’m supposed to laugh, be intimidated, or just stand there dumbfounded. “He what?”
Chapel pulls a bottle of whiskey from her nightstand and two shot glasses. She pours them without a second thought, handing me one. I take it, but I don’t drink yet. She shrugs, unfazed by my confusion. “That’s just how Lockwood and his little band of asshats are. I mean, he wasn’t always like this. But Tristan and Callum? Psychotic when they don’t get their way. And now Hayden has met you, and suddenly you’re his fairy princess that he must protect at all costs.”
The mention of Tristan has me freezing, my brain scrambling to connect the dots. “I met Tristan when he was screaming about his sister earlier, but I have no idea who Callum is.”
Chapel raises an eyebrow at me. “Tristan’s either not speaking, like the rude ass he is, or screaming about his sister. There’s no in-between. Callum has his own fixations. He’s a little tattletale, though. He’s from The Falls, just like I am, and our families don’t get along. He won’t bother you. No one will, actually, unless they have a death wish.” Chapel downs her shot and gives me a small, knowing smile before I down mine. She grabs my empty glass from me to set it next to hers.
I change the subject because I don’t like the way it’s currently going. “What about you? You don’t seem to fit the Castlebrook vibe.”
Chapel laughs, shaking her head. “Needed a break from the Falls. Whole different life out there. But the men are the same. Relentless. When they set their sights on something, they’ll do whatever it takes to keep it.” Her voice goes quiet like it’s not something she says with pride. “I think that’s why I like it here. Less people trying to claw their way into my life. More room for me to be...left alone.”
I nod, understanding more than I want to admit. I’m grateful Kirsten was full of shit about Chapel being a bad roommate. She seems like she’s down to earth and I vibe with her rules.
And maybe, knowing someone without an agenda will be enough to survive this school.