Chapter 19
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Town Hall, Freedom
D’Angelo
“N-n-nine,” Robyn whispers under her breath, stumbling after me.
Good girl.
It’s a struggle not to say it out loud.
Robyn and I are approaching Freedom’s low, square town hall, however, and although I deliberately made sure that we turned up late in order not to draw press attention, I can’t risk being overheard.
Plus, it’s part of the game to pretend that I don’t know why Robyn is flushed and struggling to walk in a straight line.
I smirk.
I am kind enough, however, to slip my hand into my pocket and tap my phone, turning off the vibrator that I left on for the entire car journey into town.
The vibrations from my classic Alfa Romeo’s engine through the seat would have doubled the delicious agony for my principessa, although I ordered her to keep her palms pressed onto her knees and not to touch herself.
I kept up casual conversation about my day like I hadn’t been tormenting Robyn.
She may have been miles away in Freedom Mansion while I was in the arena at practice, lunch, and in strategy meetings with various staff. But with this clever new toy of mine, I’d still been able to tease her.
I was impressed to hear from Eden, who I had made sure to coach on the game that Robyn and I were playing so he could keep an eye on Robyn and make sure she remained hydrated, that she’d insisted on working at her desk.
She may have taken a couple of extra breaks but still, I’m impressed.
That’s a serious work ethic, especially as it’s a Sunday. Neither Eden nor Robyn should be working, but it’s impossible to persuade either of them to rest when Shay and I are at the rink.
I hope that this Sunday evening date will at least relax Robyn in the best way.
I swipe my tongue over my lips at the thought of Robyn squirming in her seat, being edged as if by the ghost of me.
I tormented her, until she snapped her pencil in frustration.
Four pencils, in fact, gave up their lives for our game.
I salute their sacrifice.
Robyn and I both needed this distraction today.
After that nightmare, I did.
Damn Wilder.
I’m not the same scared, hazed kid, curled up on the college bus floor.
I won’t return to being that terrorized boy again, no matter how vivid my dream was.
I’m in control.
I adjust the satin bow tie of my evening suit.
A sense of calm contentment washes over me, as I look up at the worn front of the town hall. The salt air by the coast has dulled it to chalky red. The faded sign is bleached.
The town hall nearly closed a couple of years ago, but Kay and I ran fundraisers anonymously to keep it open.
This hall was one of my refuges in the early days that I arrived in Freedom.
In some ways, it saved me as much as my hockey did.
I’d watch classical recitals here. I’d lose myself in the beautiful, emotional music that would send chills down my spine and make my eyes prick with tears.
It made me feel human when I’d been conditioned that I didn’t deserve to.
Fly, like I did on the ice.
I would wish that I could perform piano for an audience like my sister did.
I have never been able to share these trips to recitals with anyone, even Kay. She understood that they were healing for me, while also being like laying flowers on a grave.
But I am finally ready to share this with Robyn.
I never dreamed that I would be able to lower my walls like this to a woman. But Robyn is different. She always has been — the one and only woman who I have loved.
Who I will ever love.
I can’t keep up the cold act.
I glance behind me.
Robyn’s cheeks are adorably pink. Her hair has been caught at her neck with the diamond hairpin that I bought her for her birthday, which makes me smile. She is wearing a gorgeous silk scarlet dress, which falls off her shoulders.
As glamorous as she is dressed, she is stumbling along like a newborn foal.
I bite back a grin.
Taking mercy, I hold out my arm to her. “Shall we, principessa?”
Gratefully, Robyn clings to my arm. “Thanks.” Then ungratefully, she adds, “Don’t you dare touch your phone again, dick.”
“But I’ll have to touch it to turn it off before the performance begins,” I say, trying to sound innocent.
Robyn is far too wrung out from coming to buy it.
She knows me too well.
“I have my eye on you and your phone finger, D’Angelo.” She rests her head against my shoulder. “Why are we at the town hall?”
“Because this is one of my favorite places in Freedom, and I want this date to be about showing you why I love playing piano so much.”
I mean that I want to show her part of my soul that no one else has seen. I haven’t been prepared to reveal it to anyone before.
It’s hard to explain that and even harder to say.
Instead, I push open the front door, leading Robyn into the small lobby that smells of disinfectant. The walls are covered in bulletin boards that are pinned with stained and curling posters.
Through the closed door at the back of the room, I can hear the excited hum of the audience.
My shoulders relax, despite the headache that has been throbbing through me all day.
I’m not the person who will be performing tonight. No pressure or expectations weigh on me.
Instead, I only have the soar of music to escape into.
“Hey, I like seeing you smile like that.” Robyn pulls back but keeps a tight hold on my arm. “I can tell already that you love this place. You should bring Shay as well. You teaching him to play piano has meant the world to him. You know, that someone thinks he’s worth being taught.”
My lips curl at the memory of my last lesson.
Shay is getting better. When I started his piano lessons, I learned that maybe I did have the patience of a saint. Now, he crashes through chords like an enthusiastic four-year-old Mozart with a rock star’s soul.
I don’t care, however, if it makes Shay smile.
“He has had too many professionals making him feel like he can’t read or he’s too short to play hockey.” My eyes narrow. “I am going to spend my life showing him that they were assholes, and he can have fun learning anything he likes.”
“Then why don’t you play here sometime?” Robyn pulls away from me, practically dancing with excitement.
My heart clenches.
I shake my head. “Thanks for the vote of confidence. But I’m more at the cocktail bar level.
I was only taught professionally until I was sent away to the Discipline School.
The pianist that we’re seeing tonight is a prodigy.
She is better than I ever could have been, even though we were taught when we were young by the same teacher. ”
It hurts to think about seeing her.
Yet it would have hurt too much not to come out here tonight.
I know the moment that Robyn realizes who it is. The light dies in her eyes.
“Who?” She still asks.
“My sister,” I reply. “Maria.”
Robyn’s shoulders lift in shock. Her eyebrows scrunch like she’s searching for what to say and isn’t sure what the right thing is.
“Why do you want to see Maria play?” Robyn finally demands. “What is this date about?”
I set my jaw. “I saw that my sister was coming to Freedom to play for the first time. Being a musician nowadays is hard. My parents believed that Maria would have this grand, global career, but it’s not like that even for people who are as good as she is.
She plays in places like this, mostly. I’m proud of her.
But I haven’t seen her in years now. I miss her playing and I wanted to share this with you. ”
Does Robyn understand?
How much my music means to me?
How much sharing my past does? Sharing my family?
Robyn touches the ring that I bought her to her lips, and a rush of relief rushes through me. “Jude, this is…” My name. She said my name. “It means a fucking lot, okay? Are you sure?”
I adjust my diamond cuff links, twisting them in anxious patterns of three. “Sure.”
“Will you speak to Maria?”
I shake my head. “What would I have to talk to her about? We’re strangers by now.
She is much older than me. Growing up, I hardly knew her because she had moved out when I was still a small kid.
Bruno was older too, but only by a couple of years.
We were close. He tried to be a good older brother, talking to me about cars, religion, and sport.
Being raised in an Italian American family, it was expected that he would be strict and keep me in line, which he did.
But he also joked around with me and protected me from everyone else, until he didn’t.
Maria was kind but distant, you know? She never knew how to connect.
But I get it now. I was just this little kid to her, and she did the right thing about fighting to save me from the Discipline School when it mattered.
I’d love to hear her play piano once more.
When I used to listen to her, I’d think that she was an angel.
” I laugh, tightly. “I never had a good grasp of the Bible, no matter how hard my family tried. But then, out of all of them, Maria was the only one who pulled me out of hell. So, it doesn’t matter how distant she was. I owe her my life.”
Robyn takes my hand. “Then we’ll sit in the back row and listen to her together, huh? Though I still bet that no one is better than you.”
I give her a fond look. “I thought that you didn’t want me to grow cockier.”
“Don’t feed a hockey player’s ego.” Robyn tuts to herself. “I keep forgetting that rule. You’re like gremlins.”
I laugh, feeling lighter. “Too late.”
Before I can drag Robyn through the door, however, it violently bangs open.
Reflexively, I jerk backward. I shield Robyn, pushing her behind me.
A short, bulky man with olive skin barrels into the lobby. He has broad shoulders and thick, black hair. He is wearing a thin suit, which is shiny at the seams.
His eyes are the same blue as mine.
When he sees me, his jaw clenches with rage at the same time as mine drops with shock.
Is this an ambush?
Terror spikes through me.
But only for a moment.
Why is my brother here?