Chapter 2
Haven
“Turn around,” I demand, tugging Kai’s hoodie sleeve. “We can still run.”
He flicks sandy hair from his eyes, batting my hand away. “We’re five minutes out, Heavenly. You really wanna have this fight again?”
“Yes.” I press my forehead to the window. “I want to have it until you turn this fucking car around.”
The drive down to the coast took hours. Coming back? Five minutes. Like the universe couldn’t wait to drag us home. Already the beach feels like a dream—warm and golden and fading fast.
I could have stayed there forever.
Pretty sure Kai could have afforded to keep me there as long as he wanted.
But no.
We decided it was our responsibility to come back.
As much as we’d love to run away together, we agreed we’d need to graduate if we ever want to be more than some broke kids from the wrong side of Riverside.
Going to college was always about escaping my shitty life—that was like ninety percent of it.
I don’t want to run away from Agony Hollow, or Riverside.
I want to fix it.
Because if I can put even a dent in the community I grew up in, that’s something. In a few years, I could be surrounded by girls who actually got the hope and the backup I never had.
I had Kai back then, but he’d been fighting his own demons.
We were prisoners of war, propping each other up so we could survive another day.
Who would we have been today if instead of just surviving we’d thrived?
The GPS chimes for a right turn up ahead. I’m not sure how Bastian will feel about Kai driving his Land Rover, but the way my boyfriend smirked when he slid behind the wheel, it seems like any punishment would be worth it.
I’m sure Professor Rooke can come up with especially torturous punishment for a bad girl and boy like—
—Whoa, that was close.
Not today, Lucifer.
The GPS announces that we’ve arrived at our destination, and I peer out the window at the Airbnb.
A gust of wind sends leaves fluttering across my view, the day darkening as a cloud passes over the sun. Agony Hollow is just as we left it—with a storm brewing on the horizon, and the taste of fall in the air.
A thrill goes through me, because it feels like we’re still kinda on holiday. I mean, what else can I call it? I nearly squealed when Kai told me he’d booked a rental near campus until we figured out where the hell we were actually going to live.
Since I don’t technically have a bed.
And since Kai doesn’t have a frat anymore.
I tried to talk to him about it on the way back to town, but he kept changing the subject. Guess he’s still marinating in denial, but come on, how long does it take to admit your brother’s a backstabbing piece of shit?
That’s Ezra 101.
Kai didn’t really want to talk about his family when we first became friends—and neither did I—but we opened up to each other a little each day. Both of us testing the waters to see at what point the other would back off and say, ‘too much drama for me’.
We played that game of emotional-baggage chicken as often as we did Columbus and Jane until we realized both our families were so fucked up that we couldn’t judge each other.
That was a turning point.
We became each other’s therapists. We’d listen, sympathize, and then concoct grand plans of revenge together while simultaneously repressing every trauma.
Not at all toxic.
No wonder we turned out so well.
“You okay?” Kai leans into my view, and I realize I’d zoned out staring at the guest unit above the property’s detached garage. The main house is barely visible past a gigantic oak tree’s boughs.
I thump Kai on the shoulder. “Yeah! Let’s fucking go!”
“Jesus, Haven!” he crows when I scramble over his lap to get out the driver’s side and knee him in the dick on the way. The cut on my foot screams when I half-tumble out the other side, but totally worth it.
That’s what you get for being a nosy fuck, Kai.
The crooked, ivy-covered gate squeals when I shove it open, and the wooden steps groan under me as I limp up to the red door. I try to open it, rattling it so hard that a few flakes of red paint drift down.
I turn back and fling out my arms like the door’s personally betrayed me.
“It’s locked!” I yell down the driveway.
Kai’s smiling as he clomps his way up the stairs, and reaches past me to a small box nailed to the door frame. I thought it was some kind of alarm system, but he presses a combo on the keypad, and takes a key out of the box.
He dangles it in front of me. “First time?” he teases.
“What do you mean?” I grumble, snatching the key from him and turning my back so I can unlock the flaking red door. “Just last week I Airbnb’d a mansion to throw a rager. Then there was that one time…”
My sour words trail off as the front door swings open.
I’m speechless.
This is nothing like Kai’s massive beach house.
This is cozy, and lived-in, and…perfect.
Kai jostles me aside with the duffel bag on his shoulder, kicking off his white sneakers, and letting the bag drop by the door.
“Didn’t look this cringey in the listing.”
“Shut up. I love it.” I slip past him, standing in the cozy living room with its two mismatched sofas that somehow go perfectly together. There’s even a flat screen on a rickety-looking cabinet. It’s already warm inside, courtesy of a space heater rattling away quietly in one corner.
I toe off my Uggs and take a quick peek at the band-aid on my foot. It was freezing down by the beach, but in Agony Hollow, it’s perfect fall weather. Just cold enough for a light sweater, not cold enough for mittens or a scarf yet.
Thankfully, it looks like I didn’t open the wound again. I’ve really got to learn to take it easy, or else this thing will never heal.
“Jesus, people still read the paper?” Kai mutters, snatching a newspaper off the coffee table.
I shove my Ugg back on. “It’s kinda sweet that they left it for us.”
He drops the paper, shaking his head as he surveys the room. “The TV looked bigger in the pics.”
“Like there’ll be time for TV,” I say.
I pick up the paper on my way past and snap it straight with a flick of my wrist.
AUTHORITIES PROBE POSSIBLE DRUG OVERDOSE—
“You’d better be talking about sex,” comes Kai’s voice, “because no way I’m studying that hard for…”
Static floods my head.
Authorities are investigating the death of an Ashwood Crossing resident found in a storm drain near the Agony River on Saturday evening, in what officials say appears to be a possible drug overdose.
Police responded to a call shortly after 6 p.m. reporting the body and later identified the deceased as—
No.
No, no, no.
My eyes scan the newspaper again and again like the words will rearrange themselves into something real.
“Hey, you listening?”
My eyes snap up to Kai’s face. “What?”
“I’m starving. Let’s order some takeout.” The frown on his face deepens. “What’s wrong?”
I roll up the newspaper. My legs carry me to the kitchen on autopilot.
“Nothing,” I mumble, blinking back a hot rush of tears as I stomp the trash can’s foot pedal.
With my sore foot.
“Fuck!” I stagger back, barely tossing the paper inside before the lid slams shut.
I’m too numb to catch my balance in time, but Kai lunges and gets to me before I fall. Him catching me in his arms like that would have been romantic as fuck…if I didn’t feel like puking.
“Whoa.” Kai steadies me, hands gripping my shoulders as he steers me to the closest sofa. I fall down on the cushion, staring at nothing.
“What the hell’s going on, Heavenly?”
I can’t answer. Can’t think past the roaring in my ears.
Bobby’s dead.
My father is fucking dead.
And instead of crying, I’m biting back a laugh.
“You’re freaking me out, Heavenly,” Kai says.
“I’m fine.” My voice sounds robotic even to my own ears. “It’s…it’s my foot. I shouldn’t have—“
“Bullshit.” He drops to his knees in front of me, those green eyes drilling into mine as he grabs my thighs and squeezes me through my beige leggings. “Tell me what’s going on.”
I open my mouth. Nothing comes out.
Just say it, Haven. A couple of words. Easy.
“My dad.” I croak. “He’s…he’s dead. It’s in the paper.”
Kai’s face goes through like twenty emotions in three seconds—shock, confusion, concern, suspicion. Then something else he quickly covers with a hard frown.
It almost looked like relief.
“Fuck.” He rocks back on his heels. “Heavenly, I—”
“Don’t.” I press my fingertips to his mouth, because if he says he’s sorry, or my dad’s in a better place, or some other condescending crap, I’ll lose it. “Just…don’t—“
A laugh bubbles up, and I have to roll my lips together to smother it.
Fuck, what’s wrong with me?
“Yeah, but…that’s a lot. Are you okay?” He looks so lost. “Can I get you something?”
A conscience, maybe. Got one of those lying around?
I clap a hand over my mouth to cover my squirming lips.
Kai eyes me suspiciously. “Are you…laughing?”
“I’m glad, okay?” The confession rips out of me. “I’m glad he’s dead, because I’m a horrible person.”
Kai stares at me like I’ve grown a second head.
Then he barks out a bitter laugh. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?”
I widen my eyes. Kai isn’t horrified. He’s furious.
Nostrils flaring, eyes narrowed. Red splotches on his face like he’s fighting the urge to punch something.
“Why the hell wouldn’t you be glad that piece of shit is dead?” His voice rises. “That fucking waste of oxygen starved you and neglected you your entire life. He let your uncle—” Kai cuts off with an angry grunt. “Why the fuck should you cry over him?”
“He was my dad—”
Kai’s harsh laugh cuts me off. “He was plenty of things, Heavenly, but a dad was nowhere on that fucking list. That guy was a fucking monster! You don’t owe monsters like him anything. Not tears, not guilt, not a single fucking thing.”
Kai rushes to his feet and starts pacing.
“Bobby never gave a fuck about you.” He stabs a finger into his own chest. “You know who did? Me! And I still do.”
His voice cracks, and somehow tells me we’re not talking about my father anymore.