10. What a Big Burden You Have
Chapter 10
What a Big Burden You Have
Phara
S till reeling from the unbelievable pleasure, Phara held their exhausted queen while Artifex carefully untied her.
“Mmm.” Isa stretched once the last knot was undone, then snuggled against his chest. The blissful smile on her face relaxed as she drifted off again.
“I’m concerned,” Artifex said as he brushed the queen’s dark mane out of her face and tucked it behind her cute little ear flap.
“About?” Phara tilted his head.
“Our queen was very mistreated by her hive,” Artifex began, keeping his tone gentle so he didn’t rouse their queen.
“I know, she was cast out.” Phara recalled her disturbing story, and it made his chest hurt.
“She was taught to dislike her form and is uncomfortable without coverings.” Artifex frowned as he affectionately ran a finger over Isa’s arm.
A growl threatened, but Phara shoved it down so he didn’t disturb Isa. Their queen was gorgeous, and it angered him she was taught otherwise. The pain in his chest doubled.
“We can get her coverings if that makes her comfortable.” Phara snuggled his queen close as he continued toward the door. He didn’t believe anything should hide Isa’s beauty, but he’d do anything to assure she was happy.
“That is only part of it.” Artifex put a hand on his shoulder, halting him.
Phara’s eyes widened, a knot forming in his throat at the grim expression on Artifex’s face. What more could there be? Their queen was cast out of her hive, but that wasn’t enough, so she was sent to a new planet to die. All this after being raised to hate her form. What other savagery could her former hive heap upon the precious creature?
“When I said our form, her form, was natural, she readily agreed and is attempting to try our way.”
“Ah.” Phara smiled affectionately at their sleeping queen, loving that she was willing to try.
“No. It’s not good.” Artifex’s grip tightened on his shoulder. “I fear that she is trying to appease us. I heard her private thoughts. She worries she may be unable to bear our hatchlings. I think she fears we’ll cast her out, too.”
“Never!” Phara felt like he’d be struck in the gut.
“I know that, but she doesn’t.” Artifex grimaced.
“We will just have to show her this is her hive.” Phara sighed, sad that he couldn’t instantly alleviate her fear. “I will take her to bathe before the feast.”
“A good idea.” Artifex nodded. “I need to stay here and make sure the feast is coming along. I will send Diligen. He can quickly fashion coverings to fit her.”
“Good.” Phara smiled as he exited the preparatory, glad that they could do something to ease their queen’s discomfort.
He should watch where he was going, but Phara’s gaze was focused on the sleeping queen in his arms. Everything changed from the moment she arrived. Isa fit a niche in their hive that had long been void. It wasn’t simply their need to produce another generation and prolong the species, though. It wasn’t the gnawing desire to mount her, either. This growing feeling was something different, something profound, and when he figured out exactly what it was, he’d tell Queen Isa.
Phara bypassed the dining commons and took the descending tunnel into the queen’s branch of passages.
“Found our queen.” Phara poked his head into the beta’s suite, located just before Isa’s chamber. “It’s bath time. Come.”
Gregis, Rego, and Galis instantly stopped their game of shofti, jumped up, and followed.
They crossed the queen’s chamber and descended into her private bath.
“I’ve heated the water as you requested before you disappeared,” Masculum, one of his gammas, reported as they entered.
“Yes. We were delayed,” Phara chuckled.
Galis’ tongue shot out and tasted the air then he grinned. “I can smell what delayed you.”
“Guilty.” Phara grinned back.
With amused smiles and happy chuckles, Gregis, Rego, and Galis waded down the steps into the bath. Phara was about to join them but hesitated. The fire next to the water channel feeding the bath was roaring, and steam wafted off the pool. The betas’ brows furrowed as they questioningly looked at him.
“I don’t know if it will be too hot for her.” Phara grimaced as he dipped his foot into the water. It felt fine to him, but he had more than himself to think about now.
“I think you’ll have to wake Queen Isabella to have her test it,” Rego suggested.
“Agreed.” Phara sat down on the nearby ledge and looked fondly down at Isa. She was breathing peacefully, making a cute little wheezing noise, and murmurs that almost sounded like something. “I don’t want to. Come and look. She’s making her adorable twitters even in her sleep.”
The three betas waded to the edge and peered at the sleeping queen cradled in his arms.
“She is very vocal,” Gregis commented as he listened carefully and watched Isa’s rosy lips move.
Phara held his breath, worried what else the beta might say. Gregis was the opposite of Galis, and wasn’t known for having the most pleasant demeanor.
“I never realized how quiet the hive was,” Gregis continued. “I like her twitters.” The male stared fondly at Isa.
Phara let out his breath, slightly shocked, but very happy that even Gregis was moved by their queen’s arrival. Gregis’ observation was also surprising. Their hive had been quiet. He hadn’t really noticed until Gregis pointed it out. Not only was Isa’s bubbly voice filling their quiet caverns, there was a happy buzz permeating the hive. When he went to find their new queen, everyone he passed radiated this zeal. Isa truly was bringing change to their hive.
“I like the fringe on her eyes. I like when it flutters as she looks at us,” Galis interjected.
That was Galis, perpetually happy and a bit special. Though, he did agree with Galis’ observation.
“Greetings, my queen,” Rego said.
At the comment Phara looked away from Galis in time to see Isa sleepily smile. Her gaze panned from Rego to him, and her smile widened, her eyes brightening.
“Greetings, my lovely queen.” Phara beamed at her.
“Why, Phara, what big teeth you have,” Isa giggled, then yawned and stretched.
Phara’s grip tightened so she didn’t roll into the hot bath, glad the betas were also there to prevent it. Her amusing sleepy observation made him laugh.
“I guess they are,” he conceded with a chuckle, then sobered. “Does that bother you?” he asked, hoping his teeth didn’t scare her since they were so different from her blunt ones.
Isabella’s eyes widened. “Sorry. No, it doesn’t bother me, not now that I am familiar with you.” She squirmed to sit up and he helped her. “It’s a line from a very old children’s story. It popped into my head when I saw all four of you leaning over, smiling at me,” she added.
“You must tell us this story,” Galis interjected, before Phara could express that he was glad.
Isa looked at the pool then back at him, noticing they were no longer in the preparatory. “What did I miss?”
“Nothing. You haven’t been asleep long,” Phara assured her. “We left Artifex to prepare the feast. I thought you might like a bath before we eat and introduce you to the hive.”
“Oh. Okay. Thank you.” Isa smiled. She then swiftly dropped a foot off his lap toward the bath.
Phara panicked, but was unable to catch her leg. Rego’s hand shot out, landing under her heel before it hit the hot water.
“Queen Isa! Now I understand Artifex’s worry. The water is hot. Test it slowly, please,” Phara relayed as his heart pounded in his chest. It was no wonder Artifex decided to tie their impetuous little queen up.
“Ah, okay, thank you.” Isa smiled at Rego.
“Careful.” The beta released her foot and she gingerly dipped her toe, then her whole foot.
“Oooh, very nice,” she cooed, obviously not bothered by the heat.
Very nice, Phara repeated, noting the temperature for future baths.
He nodded to Rego who gripped Isa’s hips and slowly lowered her into the bath. The waterline kept rising higher on her chest and it was apparent she wouldn’t reach the bottom. Rego cast him a worried look and Phara nodded toward the underwater bench instead of setting her on the bottom. A look of relief replaced the beta’s worry as he stood her on the seat.
“Thanks.” Isa nodded to the beta.
“That bench lines this entire wall,” Gregis informed her, since it wasn’t readily obvious.
“There are steps over there.” Galis pointed to the middle of the oblong pool, to the clearly visible steps.
May Inana help me. Phara wiped a hand over his face in disbelief at Galis.
“Avoid the other wall,” Phara added, quickly moving on. “It is hot at that end and there’s a drain at that other end that may catch your foot and drag you under. Do you know how to swim?” Phara’s heart picked up another beat as it occurred to him she might not know how to swim. “How about you stay here?”
Worriedly he tugged Isa onto his lap as he sat on the bench. Even though she was on his lap, the water still came up to her neck. He made a note to have a higher bench made for her.
“Phara?” Isa turned sideways on his lap, her brow furrowed as she studied him. “Is everything all right? Are you mad that I went with Artifex?” Worry reflected in her dark eyes.
“No!” His eyes widened, surprised by her question. “I wondered where you two went, but I am not mad. Never at you, my queen.”
“So, it was okay that Artifex and I were playing?” Isa nibbled her lip.
Phara glanced at his betas in confusion. Didn’t he just say it was acceptable that she went with Artifex?
“I don’t understand what you are asking.” Phara searched her face. Obviously, he was missing something.
“I think I’m the one who doesn’t understand.” Isa showed off her teeth in that awkward smile he was learning meant she was uncomfortable.
“You may tour the hive with anyone you choose.” He tried again.
Isa’s face dropped into the water and she started blowing bubbles. It felt very similar to frustrated gestures he’d made when dealing with Galis.
Suddenly it dawned on him. Phara lifted Isa’s chin and mopped off her face. “I think I understand what this is about.”
He was reticent to talk about certain subjects, some things were intensely private, but Isabella’s happiness mattered to him above anything else.
Isabella
Isa sighed in relief when Phara finally understood what she was asking.
“Artifex said you were worried you may not be able to have hatchlings.” Phara caressed her back as she sat on his lap.
Her shoulders sank. That wasn’t what was troubling her at the moment at all, but it was now—again. Her anxiety shifted gears from the question of if she was committing the sin of adultery ‘alien style’ to the fertility fear. Anxiously, she gripped Phara’s arm wrapped around her waist.
“Even if I can have your babies, I’m not able to give birth to dozens of them,” she worriedly explained. From what she understood, the whole hive was a bunch of brothers. She’d met, or at least seen, forty different people so far, and she had a feeling there were more from the size of the feast being cooked. “I don’t know how your queen mother did it, but it’s just not possible with my kind!” Maybe the Vorto were more like insects than she realized.
Phara cupped her cheeks so she was focusing on him and him alone. “Isa, as the alpha consort my purpose is to create a new generation of Vorto above all others. Can you imagine what kind of burden that is when there is no queen?”
“Yes!” She nodded emphatically, feeling a similar dilemma.
“One rotation I found myself at the edge of a cliff, debating…” Phara smiled morosely.
Isa’s eyes widened as she realized what he was saying, then her breath sped up and her eyes began to sting.
“No!” Rego declared, pain evident in his voice.
The surprise and hurt on the triplets’ faces screamed they didn’t know about this.
“I didn’t do it.” Phara squeezed Rego’s shoulder. “A screo took flight from a nearby ledge and startled me. I lost my balance and fell backward on my rump.” Phara cringed in embarrassment.
Isa let out a relieved whoosh of air. Despite knowing Phara was safe now, she could easily put herself in his shoes. She understood the depression that led him to that ledge to begin with.
“In that moment, I realized I wanted to live, that I wasn’t done yet. Although, I had no clue why.” Phara caressed her back and shoulders. “Then I caught sight of the same screo gliding on the current. It wasn’t hunting or fleeing, just soaring, making idle circles in the sunshine. The answer I was looking for somehow lay in what I was seeing.”
It was a familiar profound feeling. Occasionally one witnessed the meaning of life distilled into some simple moment and it was always hard to describe to someone who wasn’t there in that moment. She’d felt something similar when she held an ancient piece of pottery, and gazed at the artist’s fingerprint captured in time. Isa rubbed Phara’s chest, feeling similarly connected to him in this moment. It had to be hard to open up like he did.
“What was the answer?” Galis interjected.
Isa’s eyes widened at the question. It was becoming apparent Galis was a bit of a himbo.
“I’m still figuring that out,” Phara replied honestly.
“Isn’t that the truth.” Isa smiled, loving the wisdom in the simple reply.
“I can say that my life offers more joy and purpose than just my biological imperative.” Phara stared into her eyes as he spoke, and the message was received loud and clear. “I don’t relish it, but I’ve accepted that perhaps the sun is setting on the Vorto. And if that is the case or not, it is out of my hands. What I can do is find things that make me feel fulfilled in the time I’m allotted. And if I’m lucky I can help my hive with the same.”
Isa stared in awe at Phara. Never had she heard any man speak so insightfully or eloquently, especially not with her.
“You have the soul of a poet.” She smiled wistfully as she continued caressing Phara’s firm chest.
Phara questioningly tilted his head, and she realized the word poet probably didn’t translate.
“You have a beautiful perspective,” she amended.
“Do you understand that you don’t need to worry about hatchlings? If it happens, it happens. You are my queen and this is your hive. Already you have brightened these caverns.” Phara ran his thumb across her bottom lip as he gently caressed her face.
Tears slipped from Isa’s eyes as she nodded and kissed Phara’s palm. He’d lifted an immense weight from her shoulders. Phara would understand if they weren’t compatible. Not only that, he wouldn’t make her feel like she was flawed or somehow at fault. He understood there was more to life. The Vorto were truly different from everything she was used to, and she was rapidly falling for these wonderful exotic men.
“Can we still practice making hatchlings if you are unable to have them?” Galis asked, his question effectively bursting the sentimental bubble.
“Galis!” Phara telepathically barked, while growling at the same time.
“Oh my god!” Isa couldn’t help but laugh as she rubbed her eyes, dispelling her tears.
“We will see what the future holds. We are new,” Phara informed Galis. The alpha’s serious expression then turned impish. “Although, I’m rather certain our queen will want to share sex with me again, where you may never get your chance,” he teased Galis.
Galis’ mouth dropped open, his eyes widening.
“Phara!” She swatted the alpha’s chest, making him laugh. “You never know. Galis was brave enough to say what was on his mind, and he gives very nice foot massages.”
“I do!” Galis grinned.
“I really wish you wouldn’t encourage him, my queen,” Gregis requested with a grimace.
Isa grinned. With every moment that passed, she was learning more about the hive, her hive. They’d taken her in and were sharing more than simply their food and shelter with her. They were sharing a part of themselves, and she felt closer to these alien men than she did anyone back home.
“Can I ask another question?” Galis pulled her from her thoughts.
“Sure.” She smiled at him.
“What about the story of Phara’s big teeth?”
Isa burst out laughing again. Galis was right, they never circled back around to the story of the Big Bad Wolf.