Chapter 19
Ifelt a flash of victory when Zed rolled over, fast asleep, putting himself unknowingly within kicking reach. I was preparing myself to wake him, going for the most pain I could manage. When he shifted again, it was his pale hand reaching out in the darkness and curling around my waist.
I froze, goosebumps rising across my body as I felt his touch slide lower, to the place where waist met hips and my top ended.
His skin on mine was like a shot of relief I wasn’t expecting. My heart rate slowed, my breathing coming easier, rage draining away.
The pain of old scars and aching wounds, ones I’d carried so long it was hard to imagine a world without them, now dulled. Instincts, warped and desperate, dissipated at the touch of an Alpha. Not just any Alpha. It mattered that he was my mate.
I knew that as surely as I hated it.
He shifted again, a frown creasing his face in the almost non-existent light my eyes had adjusted to. His hand curled around my waist possessively, as if… as if he wanted to hold me.
I lay still for a long time, half my mind drowning in a long buried want, the other trying to gather the strength to give him that kick he sorely deserved.
My breath caught as he shifted again, hand closing tighter as if he was trying to tug me toward him. Well, his cuffs meant I wouldn’t be budging.
Fucker.
Only, instead, he shifted again on the bed, and—to my shock—drew closer, both arms adjusting to pull me into what felt like… oh. Shit.
Was he trying to hug me?
I froze, mind spiralling, panic taking hold. I didn’t even know why. He shifted closer again, and suddenly I was in his arms.
This was… I swallowed. This was great. He was exactly where I wanted him. I would make sure he woke up to agony (and the news he would never have kids).
Instead, tears burned my eyes, and I had to bite down on my lip to try to stop them.
Fuck.
I had to get a grip, but the low forest scent of snow santal unwinding my sanity without mercy.
I needed to?—
My thought died a sudden death at the vibration that rumbled through him. I frowned, but with his next exhale, a purr as loud as a motorbike rumbled to life, sending shockwaves down my spine. It was like he’d just reached into my chest and swaddled my heart in cotton wool.
I tried to claw back hot, wet escapees from my eyelashes, because Zed fucking Maverick could not be the one to free them with the flick of a stupid Alpha-purring switch.
I sniffled, trying to figure out what to do, but then he drew me tighter to his chest and—to my horror—I melted against him with a little whine.
If I wasn’t cuffed, I’d have clamped a hand over my mouth, silently screaming into it with frustration.
No.
My Omega side needed to sort herself out.
Heat was two weeks away, right?
Two.
Two weeks.
Not tonight.
It wasn’t until Zed buried his face in my neck that I realised my distress was making this worse. Actually, it was possible my distress was the cause in the first place. The more frustrated I got, the more he reacted.
Now he was purring, and I was unwinding beneath him with disgusting speed.
I took a breath, trying to calm myself. Well, uncalm myself since he was calming me. He wasn’t allowed to calm me.
Fuck.
I tried to wriggle away, but his purr shifted to a growl and his arms clamped around me like a vice.
Okay.
We were getting aggressive with the cuddles.
I needed to stop moving. It was like when the seat belt stops unrolling, so you have to feed it back to make it shift again, but instead you trap yourself against the seat tighter and tighter.
Zed, I reminded myself, was a very possessive, very primal Alpha. Definitely the faultiest seatbelt in the history of seatbelts, and I was his scent match.
For a second, another little whine rose, but I shoved it down.
His snow santal scent was like a fog, smothering my last brain cells to death. For a moment I shut my eyes, and I was stepping through a winter forest where the warm lights of santal cabins glowed ahead. Warm and comforting, a fire crackled in a deep winter night…
I’d slept half the day, but it hadn’t been restful. I was… tired, my eyelids heavy. Zed’s arms were warm around me, a blanket of protection, threatening to seal shut wounds I never thought would heal.
He was asleep, though. He wouldn’t know I’d given into this, that I sank against his chest, vanishing into a dream I knew I could never truly have.
And if he didn’t even know, Ace certainly never would… That… That was how it worked, right?
“Do you want to get out of here?”
My eyes flew open from a deep slumber at the sound of Kyan’s voice, a faint breath in my ear.
I froze, blinking up at him, trying to make out his shape in the shadows. He waited for my reply, knuckle lingering on my chin, and it was like static leaped between us. It took me a long time to orient myself, but then I nodded.
That was right, I thought. I wanted to get out of here.
But was Kyan a good alternative? I thought Zed might be right to worry about what Kyan could handle, but—Oh, my God. I was still in his arms. I definitely couldn’t face him waking like this—knowing he’d hate what he’d done.
“Is he… cuddling you?” Kyan asked, a frown in his whisper.
I nodded again.
“That complicates things,” he said.
He vanished for a moment; he could move in silence far too well.
Then he was back, pressing a pillow to my face. “Scent mark it,” he breathed.
I did as he asked, drawing my chin along the pillow.
“Shhh, shhh, shhh,” Kyan breathed as he slipped it past my back—to Zed, I assume. His grip was much weaker than it had been before I’d gone to sleep, and he was no longer purring. It took a little while, but Kyan managed to get me free of Zed’s aggressive cuddles.
How would he undo the cuffs?
Only then, I saw what he’d brought.
Bolt cutters?
Right. Obviously.
I opened my mouth when I saw him lining up the bolt cutters with the wire that Zed had attached to his bed instead of my cuffs, but then I knew Kyan hadn’t come here in order to free me.
I’d still take it over this non-nightmare-nightmare that was whining pathetically as the mate who despised me cuddled me while he slept.
The cut was clean and silent, and the next thing I knew, Kyan had his arm around my waist as he tugged me to my feet. In the darkness, his smile flashed, then he swept me up in his arms, rushing me from the room.
He froze through the doorway and I twisted my head to see Knight on the couch, bowl of popcorn in his arm as he watched what looked to be a cop show on TV.
Kyan was careful as he padded by, still frighteningly quiet. We got across the room to the strangely unsafe looking metal steps that led up to what seemed like a second-floor room. Or… something like that.
Kyan took the first step, metal creaking, and I tensed. Then another, and another, his steps sounding casual enough.
“What’s with the boxes?”
Both Kyan and I froze dead still at the sound of Knight’s voice. I glanced over; he was still facing the TV, settled in for the night, a black silk wrap around his locs, wearing sweatpants and a thin bathrobe that hung open.
Kyan took another step, clearly trying to stay casual. “Pillows. Building her a nest,” he replied, continuing up the steps.
Knight snorted, still not turning. “Where?”
“In my pad.”
“You think Zed’s gonna let you take her up to—” Knight cut off as he turned his head, incredulous expression on his face, mouth full of popcorn.
There was a long, long silence, where Knight stared at us, and we him.
Then he leapt to his feet, growl (and popcorn) suddenly filling the air.
Kyan ran, and I flung my chained wrists over his neck, holding on for dear life.
“NO!”I could see Knight scrambling hands and feet behind us as Kyan clambered up the steps along the wall, boots clanging with each step. My eyes flicked down to the floor for half a second, trying not to think about what would happen if Kyan made even one slip up. There was no safety barrier.
That was before we reached the fucking ladder.
“Kyan!” I gasped, as he released me with one hand—with far too much ease and balance—to carry me up. He reached the top, where he set me down, then turned in a flash and ripped the ladder back.
Knight was seconds behind, but had enough momentum to leap across the now empty gap. I let out a breath of shock as he missed, but his fingers curled over the platform. With a grunt of effort, Knight managed to drag himself up, elbows over the edge, eyes lit with fury.
Kyan reacted quickly, skidding on his knees before Knight. “Let go,” he snapped.
“No.”
“Last warning.”
“Kyan!”
Kyan grabbed Knight’s arms dramatically, leaning close as he whispered, “Long live the king.”
Knight, rather smartly, let go before Kyan could actually shove him off and I heard a thump and then a curse from below.
Kyan whooped with joy, to turn and find me bent double in stitches of laughter. Laughter like I hadn’t experienced in as long as I could remember.
For a moment, the last few years melted away entirely. Tears streamed down my face as Kyan’s arms wound around my waist, just holding me close, the wind of a lightning storm sweeping me away.
From the ridiculous thrill of that chase—and the stupidity of hearing my mate quote the fucking Lion King in the name of my defense—the world had flipped in an instant. Why wasn’t I mad? Or anxious? Or… anything. Instead, he was just… perfect and beautiful.
“This space is for you,” he said, looking around. I followed, seeing we were on a wide metal platform with a huge inset bed. “I got pillows. Omegas like pillows.”
There were… so many pillows. Everywhere. Against the metal bars that made up the walls, piled onto the bed, crowding before the wall mounted TV. Not to be cliche or anything, but I swear slick pooled between my thighs at the sight of them all. “And snacks and water,” he was saying. I spied two boxes full of every snack under the sun. “And the bathroom’s over there.”
“There’s a bathroom?” I asked, peering around the corner to see a door that led to a small room.
“I paid a lot for the plumbing,” he told me rather proudly. “And even the metal around here.” He clapped the bar set up like a boxing ring that circled the whole thing. “Can’t spy through here, so no bugs. Basically, it’s safe, and it’s yours. You can stay as long as you like. I’ll even walk the plank if you?—”
“No.”I grabbed him.
And… shit. I was crying again, and laughter was no excuse this time.
He cupped my chin, leaning close and licking the tear from my face because… well, because he was Kyan, but it made me giggle. And cry more.
“What the hell?” Zed’s voice from below gave me an irrationally giddy shot of adrenaline. Both Kyan and I scrambled to the edge of his pad. “Where is—?” He cut off, eyes finding us. “Absolutely fucking not,” he snarled. “Knight?—!”
“No.” Knight had a broom in hand and was sweeping up his popcorn with a stoney expression. “You want to try and get up there?” he spat. “I won’t. Last time?—”
“I took his fucking tasers?—”
“Like he hasn’t got two more?” Knight demanded. “I quit. I quit this whole Omega bullshit.”
“You can’t quit?—”
“I can. If you and Kyan want to fight over her, go for it. She can do what she wants.”
“There, see,” Kyan breathed, tugging me back to the bed and already arranging pillows around us. “Up here you’re safe. This is your Oasis.”
The sounds of Knight’s TV, and a hissed argument between the other two was faint in the background. The TV was comforting. I always liked sleeping with one on, and here my mate’s scents were everywhere.
“Why?” I asked, peering up at him as he finished with his pillow arrangement.
I’d… left him.
“You were my first Oasis,” he whispered. “When I was about to break, you gave me more to live for.” He drew me close. “I’ve always believed in you.”
I swallowed, suddenly terrified of what he was saying. Of what it meant. “What if it was dangerous for you to… to be with me?”
“I would rather die than leave you behind,” he said, as if it was the easiest thing in the world. “How long has it been since you’ve had one?” Kyan asked.
“One… what?”
“A place you knew you were safe?” I clenched my jaw, eyes burning, curling up tighter. He wound his arms around my waist, and it was the most comforting thing I’d ever felt, down the feeling of his bracelets brushing my skin.
I let out a squeak of surprise as a tentative paw pressed up against my hip, followed by a whole chunky, fluffy cat.
“Lucy?” I asked, blinking through the dim light.
Her purr got louder at the sound of my voice and she dug her way into the blankets at my side. A sob broke from my chest as I hugged her close.
“Oh,” Kyan chuckled. “She loves it up here. Now.” He pressed a gentle kiss to my temple. “Sleep, Baby. It’s still nighttime.”