Chapter 39
How many times had I woken?
Sometimes, there was light filtering down from above—I’d lived a dream a thousand times. A bond I should never have had. But I knew when something was too good to be true.
But snow santal turned bitter, and Ace was there… I’d given up at last. I had tried to hand him everything, had begged him to take anything if it meant never seeing them in danger again.
Had I managed to?
WasZed alive?
I hid from the surface, too afraid of what reality held.
I knew I would wake to his arms around my waist, teeth grazing my neck as he told me a truth I would never survive.
So I ran from it, trying not to wake, like I could push it off forever.
When I woke up next, I was crying.
I inhaled the cool pear grove, arms drawing me close as I tried to swim through the swamp of fatigue that still weighed me down.
I was in a bond. I could feel them there within a bundle of life tucked away in the back of my mind. How many times had I dreamed of this? Of what it would be like? Yet, I couldn’t be… Everything around me was warm, uncomfortably so, but my mind was still so heavy, and I tumbled back into nothingness, afraid of the moment when the cool sweet scent of pear would turn to roses.
The next time I awoke, it was to a thunderstorm. To the cracks of lightning, the cool rain upon my skin. To a place safer than imagining.
I tried to dive back down, knowing this one, I couldn’t bear to lose. Only, this time, I struggled to vanish. I could feel the slow breaths at my back, each rustle of his skin against mine like static electricity, promising safety.
I tried, and tried, and tried, but sleep didn’t find me again, and the lightning storm never left, no matter how many seconds passed.
“Glade?”
That was Kyan’s voice, a distant echo as I squeezed my eyes shut, panic gripping me, tightening my chest.
It wasn’t possible.
A lightning storm rose in the air, worried and smothering as his purr stuttered out.
“I can’t…” My words fractured. He was still there. Still holding me, peace in clouds, and rain, and rolling thunder. Was it… real?
His purr vibrated at my back. Ace would never purr for me like that.
I swallowed.
If this was real, then so was the bond. A whine of terror slipped out, and warm arms drew me closer. But this couldn’t be happening. I couldn’t undo this. When Ace caught up… I couldn’t be theirs. He would never let it go.
How was I in this bond?
I had to have accepted it, hadn’t I?
Yet… I thought I had.
I shivered, examining the connection open between me and these Alphas. I… I had accepted it in a moment of weakness.
“No…”
“Oasis…” Kyan’s voice was a sweet whisper, and he drew me closer. “You’re safe.”
“I… I’m not.” The words were thick with tears. I was shivering, both with shock and something else. My skin was hot. I reached up by instinct, placing my hand on his chest. It was bare, ridges of muscles beneath my touch.
I was so confused. Guilty, of both doing this to them, and…
“It’s okay, Glade.” His hands closed around my waist, and he shifted us, propping us up and drawing me onto his lap. I kept my eyes squeezed shut, pressing myself against him, feeling a rush of relief at every inch of my skin against his.
My loose hair brushed the side of my hand, and I felt a prickle of pain.
“Zed…?” I asked. I realised my voice was raw—much too raw, like I’d been screaming.
“He’s alive,” Kyan whispered into my temple. “You saved him.”
My breath caught, a flood of relief surging through me, and I finally found the strength to open my eyes and look up into his.
Beautiful gems of jade.
Not ice-blue with a sweep of black hair.
And his scent that drowned out everything else in the whole world.
This was real.
All of it was.
“You almost went into heat,” he murmured, palms gentle beneath my loose top, gently pressing against my waist. His every movement soothed me, making it easier to breathe. “I gave you suppressants to delay it. Not forever, but just for a bit.”
I tried to keep up, but thinking still felt like swimming through mud.
Heat…?
That explained the discomfort. But it wasn’t that bad right now, not with his skin against mine.
“This was a mistake.” My voice cracked. “You’re all in danger?—”
“Shh…” Kyan drew my chin up, cutting off my argument as he pressed his lips to mine, catching me off guard before I could finish. A whimper rose in my chest, and my hands were desperate, clutching his cheeks despite the ache of my wounds. I drew him closer, every instinct demanding more, and the irate heat that was lurking faded at last.
When I found my strength enough to break it, breathing heavily as I looked between his eyes, he quirked a smile, tucking my hair behind my ear.
“Never ever apologise for being ours, Oasis.”
“But—”
I cut off as he flipped us so I was on my back. He pressed his teeth to my neck as he buried me in a sea of soft pillows and blankets. Another sound vibrated through my body, but I didn’t know if it was afraid or relieved.
He was here…
Ace had spent years conditioning me to be afraid, but my instincts… they told me this was right. He was… perfect. The east to my west, an unwavering absolute that fear could not unseat.
I let out a moan as his hands explored my body, goosebumps rippling along my skin, slick pooling between my thighs in seconds.
“Never apologise,” he growled again, drawing back, eyes as bright as they were firm. “Keep trying and I’ll have you shaking beneath me, begging me to stop, and I might just push you into that heat after all.”
I caught my argument this time, unwilling to call his bluff—not that any of that sounded bad, but I… I didn’t deserve that. Not right now. He didn’t understand the weight of what I’d done to them—the endless depravity of the monster that now sought them. He drew back, head cocked, but I reached after him, shock echoing through my body as his contact vanished.
I was really broken.
He frowned, bundling me back up in his arms in a moment and drawing me against him, hands cupping my face tenderly as he ran his lips gently along my jaw and neck. “Let me take care of you,” he breathed. “You’re burning up. The meds can only do so much. If they’re going to work, you need to relieve a little of this tension.”
I opened my mouth to argue, but then his teeth caught my nipple and it was like a bolt of electricity through my nerves. I shifted, knowing my perfume was thick in the air.
“Good girl,” he breathed, one hand firm in my hair, keeping me in place as he teased my nipple again, his other hand slipping beneath my panties. I was in an oversized T-shirt that smelled like all of them. He’d changed my clothes—or one of them had.
“I can’t…” I tried to argue, but I couldn’t fight him, low whines breaking free with each breath as he dipped two fingers into me, keeping pressure on my clit with his palm as he tugged at my nipple again.
“Since you’re so argumentative, let me tell you how this is going to go.” He leaned back so he could meet my dazed eyes as his fingers worked me.
It was almost embarrassing how quickly I melted beneath his touch, fingers biting into his bicep while I panted. “Knight, Zed, and me. We’re yours. No arguments. No returns. You’re our Omega. That means you’re our queen.”
It was almost cruel how soothing his words were, with his fingers curling right against my centre, working me with such ease as I stared into those glittering jade eyes. A cool, relieving orgasm rushed in so fast it was dizzying.
“That’s right, Oasis,” he breathed as I arched and he curled his fingers into me just right, letting me ride out the orgasm to its very end.
For a long, long moment I was still, breathless and speechless, unable to tear my gaze away as I let the surge of hormones pass. He was purring again, cupping my cheeks once more, as he watched me like he was looking for an argument.
“Is that clear?” he asked.
I could only stare at him.
“If it’s not, I can send you off that cliff over and over until you understand.”
“I…” I swallowed, voice caught in my throat. “I…”
Why couldn’t I say it?
Kyan didn’t pause, lowering himself between my thighs before I could protest, fingers slipping into me again, and I let out a gasp as his tongue found my clit, his tongue ring wiping my mind blank.
I let out a low moan, scrambling to remember what he’d asked. “I… I understand.”
He drew back for a moment, jade eyes flashing. “Say it.”
“I’m…” I gritted my teeth, stars bursting to life in my vision as his tongue ring brushed my clit again. “I’m yours.”
“No, Baby, that’s not what I said.” He nipped the soft part of my inner thigh and I let out a squeak, but he’d already dragged his tongue up my centre again, fingers curling deep into my core.
I couldn’t think straight, my mind already racing toward the edge of another climax. I whined as he sped up, slick pooling around his fingers as my body trembled with pleasure. Everything he’d asked of me, gone.
I cried out when I came, shaking violently as he dragged the climax out again until I was shuddering with bliss.
Then he was caging me in, fingers holding my chin as he forced me to look at him. “You’re not ours,” he growled, nipping my lip. “We’re yours.”
I stared at him, chest heaving in relief, the slightly too intense heat of my stomach dissipating already.
“I love you so much,” he breathed, dragging me into his arms. “Until you feel better, you are never going to be alone.”
Alone...?
I’d almost... been.
Forever.
Without him.
And now, I was in this grand bedroom, with sunlight filtering in, surrounded by cream wallpaper and a glittering chandelier of light above.
It didn’t feel real.
“Glade, look at me,” Kyan murmured, sitting down beside me. I blinked up at him. I would never get tired of those beautiful jade eyes. “He will never touch you again.”
That promise was like a precious little flare, dancing to life, yet still, I couldn’t go near its warmth.
“You don’t...” My voice was choked. “You don’t understand.”
“I understand more than you know,” he replied. My eyes snagged on his. “You think another Alpha could claim my mate, and I wouldn’t watch his every move?”
I froze. “I don’t understand.”
“I’ve been with you, always,” Kyan breathed. “My only mistake was thinking...” He frowned. “I thought you’d chosen to move on... I remember why you fell for us.”
I shut my eyes, another tear leaking down my cheek.
A choice.
That’s what Zed had offered, the thing I’d found irresistible. And it was, in the end, the thing that had kept him away.
Kyan didn’t want to take that from me again.
“You never came looking for us,” he said. “So I thought...” His gaze darted to the side, but I felt the bundle of nerves from him in this new connection.
He’d thought I didn’t want him.
“I never wanted to hurt you,” I said. “You couldn’t be involved in this. If you’ve been watching, you know what he’s like?—”
“I wouldn’t make this promise if I couldn’t keep it,” Kyan cut me off, drawing me closer. “He will never find you in your sleep, or take you from us; he will never touch you again.”
I stared at him, trying to reject that promise, trying to keep it at bay before I tumbled headfirst into a feeling I couldn’t afford.
“You aren’t alone anymore.” I felt his end of the bond open, and my heart clenched, chin quivering. “And you will never be alone again.” He took a breath, drawing me closer, a low purr rumbling in his chest.
I broke, years and years of terror splintering me open as tears flooded my cheeks, soaking his shoulder.
“Take a chance on me, my Sweet Oasis. I will never let you fall.”