Chapter 3
Chapter Three
Finn
THEY MOVED ONTO BIGGER and harder walls after those initial climbs. Elijah never looked entirely at ease, but he probably only seemed that way to the likes of Finn and Mylo and the others here who regularly competed on ropes.
Finn didn’t want to be thinking about the comps right now. They loved competing, but anyone here could tell you how draining that rigorous competition season was.
It was a little extra draining for Finn, however.
Only a few months ago, with significant help from Jude, they’d finally come out to the climbing world. Not as gay. That would have been an experience in and of itself. But Finn got the added fun of coming out as non-binary.
It was both a relief and a terrifying new burden. For years, they’d gritted their teeth and held back. They’d accepted being called a man, and they would still be competing with the men for the sake of the pro circuit. But at least now they might be called the right thing more often than not.
Finn glanced up from putting on their climbing shoes to watch Ty belay Jude up a tough 5.13 route. That was a high enough difficulty grade to stump anyone here, but Jude was handling it well. He lifted a leg high, his rainbow leggings stretching as he brought his foot up and set it on a tiny chip.
“Allez!” Finn shouted. It was French, but pretty much every climber used it as the equivalent of “good luck” or “you got this” regardless of their nationality. Plus, Finn was the one Canadian here. If anyone should be shouting French, it was them.
They could have sworn Jude smiled at the sound of their voice cheering him on. Finn smiled as well, privately and while biting it back. It was hard not to smile whenever they looked at that silly, impossible man, though. With his sandy hair and typical climber’s build, Jude could have blended in at just about any climbing gym in the world. But to Finn he stood out like sunlight bursting through stormclouds. Jude was the reason Finn was out now, not because he’d forced that, but because he’d shown them a future in which people could accept Finn. When they met, Jude was “straight,” but he’d not only admitted his attraction to Finn, but dove into every new experience with earnest exuberance.
“Come on, Jude!” Ty shouted up at him. “You got it. Reach!”
Jude stretched, fingers scrabbling after a tiny chip of a hold Finn could barely even see from the ground. Jude’s fingertips caught on the crystal of rock. For a moment, he held firm, pulling his body up on that impossible little flake of stone.
All at once the tension broke. Jude slipped off, his feet going as soon as his finger gave way. Ty and Finn groaned in unison, even as Ty cinched up on the rope keeping Jude safe and lowered him to the ground.
Finn had never managed to get their shoes all the way on, but they struggled over to Jude anyway, walking on their tip toes with their tight rock climbing shoes partially hanging off their feet. They wrapped Jude in a hug the moment he got free of his rope and kissed his cheek.
“That was great,” Finn said. “You were so close.”
Jude’s hands went to Finn’s waist, their favorite place to linger, at least in public. “I’m sure you’d sail right up it.”
“Definitely not. That’s a tough route.”
Finn was probably the better lead climber out of the two of them, but the difference was nowhere near as large as Jude thought. Jude definitely had more power than Finn, as evidenced in the strong arms holding Finn close now. Finn was more slender and kept their inky black hair long where Jude’s was neat and short. But in all their time together, all of their differences had only served to bring them closer together. Sure, Finn was Asian and non-binary and had been openly queer most of their life. Sure, they were dating just about the most typical looking white climber dude they’d ever met. But none of that mattered once Finn saw Jude’s open heart, his endless optimism, his boundless, fearless enthusiasm for things that were brand new to him.
Lukas was ready next, and Finn stepped up to belay him so Ty could get a break. The six of them cycled through the climb, testing out different moves, conferring with each other, comparing betas and theories. It ate up the afternoon, especially with so many of them all trying to get on one climb, but no one seemed inclined to leave their cozy little group to climb something else. There’d be time for that later in the trip; for now, it seemed like everyone was simply happy to be back together in one place.
The sun sank swiftly, dipping below bristling trees and stony walls of rock. Dark came on quickly this time of year, and soon they had to pack their things and head back to camp. They could have done some night climbing with the right gear, but no one had brought head lamps and things like that for what was supposed to be a casual, fun get-together.
“I’ll cook,” Jude said as soon as they all returned to camp.
“I’m definitely not going to argue with that,” Mylo said.
“You can cook?” Ty said.
“Dude, come on,” Jude said. “Finn, please back me up.”
Finn hesitated, glancing between their pleading boyfriend and his best friend. Jude and Ty had forged a bond the second they both joined the U.S. national climbing team, and it was adorable to witness, but Ty was just as willing to give Jude shit as Finn was. Finn shared a brief, devious look with Ty before they answered.
“Hmm,” Finn said. “I’m not so sure. Insufficient evidence.”
“Cold,” Ty said, laughter in his voice.
“Seriously?” Jude said. “You too? Fine, cook for yourselves, then.”
“Hey, hey, I was promised food,” Mylo piped up from near his tent.
Ty broke into a grin. “As long as it’s edible, I won’t complain.”
“It’ll be better than edible,” Jude grumbled.
Everyone broke off to stow their climbing gear in their tents or trunks and change into clothes that weren’t covered in sweat and dirt. Elijah got a fire started in the pit in the center of their camp while Jude retrieved cans of beans and boxes of mac ‘n’ cheese from his and Finn’s supplies. It wasn’t a glamorous meal, but after a day of climbing, it was filling, and that counted for a lot.
Finn joined Jude at the fire once he had everything in a pot and was stirring it over the flames. Jude crouched beside the pot, and Finn squatted down beside him, wrapping an arm around his waist.
“Smells pretty good,” Finn said.
“Oh, so now my cooking is good enough? Where was your support earlier, you traitor?” Jude said.
“Can’t have you getting complacent,” Finn said. “How will you meet my lofty demands?”
Jude shot a look over at Finn that the dancing shadows cast by the fire turned positively sinister. “You know I’ll meet just about any demand you’ve got, baby.”
Finn hoped the dark hid the heat that flushed into their face. Jude was definitely up to every challenge Finn had thrown his way so far. He’d gone from only having sex with women to hooking up with Finn with hardly a whisper of hesitation. And they’d only found more ways to explore since getting together during the professional lead climbing season. Traveling between Salt Lake City, where Jude lived, and Vancouver, where Finn lived, wasn’t always easy, but it was definitely always worth it.
Jude’s joyous chuckle snapped Finn from their embarrassment. “I can see you blushing. Wow, I really got you, huh?”
“We’re in public,” Finn muttered.
“Pshh, these guys? They don’t care. Look.”
Jude leaned over to take Finn by the chin and draw them to his mouth. His lips were warm but firm, fearless as they pressed against Finn’s right there by the fireside. No one whistled or made any remark. When they eased apart, no one was looking at them. Here, they were just another queer couple among other queer couples.
Damn, that felt nice.
The lead climbing season had been full of uncertainty. They’d started hooking up long before anyone else knew about their budding relationship. At the same time, Finn was contending with whether or not to come out to the climbing community.
Here, at last, it felt like they could just be. Finn sighed, shoulders slouching like they’d just taken off a coat made out of lead. Their whole body felt lighter, even after a day of hard climbing. They could be themself here. They could kiss Jude beside the fire, hold his hand while hiking toward rocks, trust the people around them to address them correctly and without wrinkling their noses.
“I’m really glad we decided to do this,” Finn said.
Jude blinked. The jump in topic must have seemed strange to him. He never really worried or stressed the way Finn did.
“I am too,” he said. “It’s going to be super fun climbing with everyone. Help me dish out this chili mac, okay?”
Finn nodded, but they didn’t go to retrieve the bowls right away. For a moment, they simply crouched there beside the fire smiling at their sweet, earnest, unassuming partner, this perfectly ordinary man who was anything but average. This regular guy who never stopped surprising them.