Chapter 10
Ten
K ept
Once Jayla got her suitcase from the trunk, I took her into the house.
She immediately dipped into the powder room while I tried to determine the best strategy for letting everybody else know that she was staying the night.
When she came out of the bathroom, I decided that everybody was probably numb from all of the shocks and surprises of the day.
One more wouldn’t hurt. I took her into the kitchen and reintroduced her to Nehemiah and Ayden, both of whom had met her before, but it had been a little minute.
When the women started to trail into the house from the deck, I took the time to point out her presence to them as well.
Both Aunt Reese and Yahirah looked at Jayla like they wanted to lay hands on her. Nehemiah’s wife Cecily was, of course, indifferent, and Xarielle looked completely caught off guard.
The day had sucked ass. I was ready for it to end.
“Yo,” I began to the gathered crowd. “It’s been a long ass day.
If nobody needs anything else, I’m shutting it down for the night.
Xarielle and I have planned tomorrow’s festivities down to the letter.
If you still need to shop for a gift, the stores open at 8:00 a.m. The party starts at 1:00 p.m. Good night. ”
Jayla sidled up to me. “Where’s the . . . Where am I sleeping?”
I remembered that Jayla had never been inside my house before. The last time she visited the girls, we were in the house we’d lived in as a family.
“Let me show you.”
All of us, except Xarielle, whose room was on the lower level, traipsed up the stairs. To the left of the landing was the loft—an open space with only two full walls.
“It’s so open,” Jayla commented, and I could hear the disappointment in her tone.
I hoped she could hear the resolve in mine, when I said, “It’s an air mattress. I guess you could pull it out onto the enclosed back porch.”
Bedroom doors began to open and close around us as the others turned in for the night. Soon, it was just Jayla and me.
“Can’t I just pull it into your bedroom? At least, I wouldn’t be all exposed.”
“My bedroom has guests in it, but even if it didn’t, I couldn’t agree to that. This is all I have to offer. What are you gonna do, Jay? It’s either this, or you can find a hotel in Charleston. I need you to decide because I’m tired as hell. I’m trying to shut it down.”
She stomped her foot, crossed her arms across her chest, and sucked her teeth. And in spite of the blonde hair, the blue eyes, and the curvier figure, she looked like the Jayla that I used to know.
“You said it was just one night. I don’t get the issue.”
She sucked her teeth again. “Fine. Where’s the air mattress? And can I get some sheets, a blanket, and a pillow?”
My front porch had a bed swing on it. While I didn’t plan to sleep out there, I did need some place I could hide from my family. Someplace to stretch out and unwind before I went to sleep for the night. I didn’t trust my back deck. I felt like any of my relatives could end up out there at any time.
The temperature was balmy but had a slight chill.
I grabbed a blanket and a pillow then headed out of the front doors.
I was unsure of how long I was out there before the front doors opened and closed.
I tried not to sigh. It seemed like there wasn’t anywhere I could go inside or outside of my own house to get some peace from my guests.
I loved my family, but they were overwhelming as hell.
I smelled her fresh, clean scent before I opened my eyes, and my anxiety immediately decreased. She was the one person I could actually deal with.
“I looked all over for you. Something finally told me to see if you were asleep in your truck in the driveway,” she teased me from the foot of the bed swing. “Ooh, I never noticed that you had one of these. Can I lay on it with you? Do you think it’ll hold both of us?”
“It better.” I stopped it from swaying, and she climbed in beside me. My heart rate eased into a relaxed cadence.
She placed her head right next to mine on the pillow.
My breathing evened out. This girl was like medicine for my soul.
“Do you want to talk about how you’re feeling or no?”
“I don’t even know how I’m feeling outside of overwhelmed. I’m overstimulated like a motherfucker.”
A soft, tinkly giggle escaped from her. “That’s probably the understatement of the year, Kept.
You know we had similar upbringings? We’re both the products of absentee mothers.
You’re lucky because your father’s always been in your life.
My father was killed when I was about three, and we both had lackluster maternal grandmothers.
I mean, I heard that yours is a party animal and mine is just disconnected.
You were lucky to have your great-grandmother, and I was lucky to have Mama Reese. But the similarities are wild.”
“Damn, you’re right. They are.”
“I don’t know how I would feel if Tasha, that’s my biological mom, showed up and expected to build a relationship with me.”
“It’s crazy work on her part to even presume that the shit is possible. I don’t know, man.”
“And then for your ex to show up on the same day with the exact same energy as your bio mom . . .”
“Say word! All I wanted to do was give my daughter the birthday party she asked for and spend some time with my family. I didn’t expect all this fucking drama.”
“Is there anything I can do to help?”
I found her hand in the darkness of the front porch, took it in mine, and threaded our fingers together. “This. Just keep doing this.”
“Keep doing what? What am I doing?”
“Being my calm. Helping me keep my head from exploding, Xari.”
She moved closer to me. “You called me Xari.”
“Yeah,” I said softly. “I don’t want to keep you at a distance anymore.”
“You’ve been trying to keep me at a distance, Kept?” She snickered.
I snickered too. “You couldn’t tell?”
“Not the way you were massaging my feet on the deck last night.”
“I spooked you. You couldn’t get away from me fast enough after that.”
She turned on her side. “Did you not feel that spark? It traveled right through my body and landed in a place that it should not have landed. I work for you, Kept.”
“I don’t give a shit about that.” I waved the thought off.
“We have a connection. It’s deeper than just the fact that you love my girls.
I like seeing you every day. I like hanging out on the deck every night, talking about everything and nothing.
You know more about me than the woman I have two children with.
Than the woman who birthed me. I don’t think it’s crazy to want to explore that. ”
“I don’t want to have a fling with my employer.”
“You think I’m trying to show my girls a fling? I’m not trying to have a fling. If I wanted to fuck up on something, I wouldn’t shit where I live. This is different from that. Like I said, I like being around you, Xarielle. I’m trying to explore that.”
Both of us were quiet just laying together in the silence of a Jackson Island night.
“What do you want, Xari?”
“Something I’ve never had–to be loved and cherished. To be considered and protected. And I’ll give the same back to the person who gives those things to me.”
“Say less.”
We fell into silence again. I didn’t know what was going through her mind, but I was thinking about her, about how sweet she was, about how I’d never known a person with such a pure heart outside of my daughters.
But they were babies. The harshness of life hadn’t been given the opportunity to corrupt them yet.
Xarielle was given a fucked up hand—absentee mother, disengaged grandmother, and mean and jealous family members just to name a few things.
According to her, she’d been living in a shoebox sized apartment, working a dead-end job, and driving a trap-ass vehicle for at least the last seven years with no clue as to how to better her own situation.
But she still had light in her eyes. She still had hope.
She still operated in goodness. She was still open.
She wasn’t bitter. That right there drew me to her.
The fact that she wasn’t bitter was sexy as hell to me.
“Just so you know, I’m firing Sanders’s ass.”
“Okay. Can we get a lady instructor? I’m saying, not some Sports Illustrated swimsuit model baddie chick. Like a regular lady who can swim and teach others to swim, somebody motherly or a gay guy.”
I rolled over on my side so I was looking at her profile.
“Did this dude do something to make you uncomfortable? Did he touch you inappropriately?” I felt my blood start to boil. I was going to have to fuck this dude up.
“No, nothing like that. As a woman, I’m just hyper aware of the vibes men are putting out. If they seem safe, like I can let down my guard, or if they feel . . . I’m not sure if unsafe is the word. They might not necessarily feel unsafe, but they feel questionable.”
I squeezed her hand.
Her sigh was heavy, weighed down with angst. “They make you feel like things could go either way. Like they could be cool, and you could walk away with everything being everything. Or things could go left, and you might end up using your self-defense skills, your mace, or your Glock on them. Let’s just say that when I was in the pool with him today, I kept my eye on his nuts.
Just in case I had to squeeze the hell out of them or kick him in them. ”
“He’s definitely fired. I didn’t like the way the motherfucker was ogling you in your bikini. But my father mentioned that he was kinda handsy with you today. I knew I was firing his ass. I just didn’t know if I needed to fuck him up as well.”
“Just replace him. I love the idea of an instructor coming here so I don’t have to pack up the girls and drive to a pool and stuff. Let’s just get somebody less creep-like.” She snuggled closer to me if that was possible.
I laughed. “What are you doing, girl?” I asked while pulling her even closer, because I loved the feel of her warm skin on mine.