Chapter 5
Quinn
Dylan was right.
Lucas was only friendly after Noah and Farrow left the gym last night.
Was he annoyed? Why would he be? He didn’t know them.
And if he’s leaving, severing his last tie by selling the house and not planning to visit, just like he didn’t for the past eight years, then he shouldn’t have really cared about not being able to talk to me. What would be the point, right?
He didn’t even know for sure if I was going to be there last night…
Unless…
I lie in bed, looking up, the soft glow of my parents’ lanterns around the driveway outside dancing on the ceiling of my dark bedroom. It’s a little before four, but I’ve been up for half an hour, replaying in my head the moments at the gym last night.
Could he…have been jealous?
I entwine my fingers where they lay on my stomach. I could barely resist looking at him constantly last night. When Noah and I ran together. When the guys helped with my machine.
When I laid on Noah’s back.
I hope Lucas didn’t notice how I was stealing glances at him.
At first, it felt like we were strangers, because I didn’t say hi and he didn’t say it, and the longer neither of us talked, the more awkward it felt, but damn, I loved it.
My heart beat so fast. I always wondered if I would still have my crush if I saw him again.
Now I know. Steam had covered my skin and fire had filled my chest, and he was all I was aware of.
And even more, as the minutes went by, because he stayed close. He didn’t leave to go play racquetball or bench press with his friend.
I release a breath, a light layer of sweat coating the back of my neck.
A fantasy flashes in my head of Lucas in a suit, like the one from two nights ago, picking me up at the gym and not taking me home.
I blink slow, clearing my head. No. To him, I’m like his kid sister. He’d never forget all the years and see me as any other woman.
He wasn’t jealous. He was protective. Like my brothers.
But two things are certain. When we were alone in the bakery yesterday morning, and at the gym last night, it felt like it used to in all the best ways. I’m easy with him like I’m not with anyone else. I thrive in his presence.
And…I still want him.
As much as I did when I was sixteen and thought about him and missed him. And when I was eighteen and twenty and ready for it all and remembered him shirtless in his car after a day at the lake.
He gave me his number when he dropped me off last night, in case I needed a ride home again.
Maybe tonight…
My T-shirt sticks to my chest, and I breathe shallow. Sliding my hands down, I rub between my legs, over the sheet, the sudden urge to strip off everything almost scorching. I’m throbbing so hard.
I sigh. “I need to get my own apartment.”
I’d lived in the dorms my entire three years at Notre Dame, but I opted not to have a roommate. Plenty of privacy. Not that I’d never touched myself with my parents in the house, but maybe I don’t want to be quiet anymore. Or have to stick to my bedroom.
I’m late anyway. I need to get to Frosted.
I groan and sit up, throwing off the bedding. Grabbing my phone, I swipe and log in, seeing two missed calls from Hawke.
What does he want? I check the time of the notifications. 12:08 a.m. The last one was 12:45 a.m.
And that’s why I put on a Do Not Disturb, Hawke.
If someone’s hurt, they’ll call my mom down the hall. The little amount of sleep I can manage is crucial, and my younger family members like to send me reels at one o’clock in the morning, or wait until 11 p.m. to invite me out on a weekend night.
Dropping the phone back to the nightstand, I head downstairs.
The house is silent except for the grandfather clock that chimes four.
Not even the stairs creak because our house isn’t very old and my mom has carpet on the steps.
They built this place just before I was born; Madoc getting the house he grew up in just a little way down our same quiet street.
I’m not sure why my father gave up his home only to build another in the same neighborhood.
It’s one of the family secrets I still haven’t cracked.
But I loved growing up here, outside the main part of the town. Sleepy, clean, and it smelled good. The surrounding forest made a great space for hikes, nature walks, and animal-watching.
There’s not many people my age around here anymore, though.
Swinging around the banister, I head toward the kitchen.
My parents usually wake up around six-thirty, and I think it’s one of my favorite things about my profession.
Having the house to myself for a little while before I head to work.
It’s different than staying up late. By then, I’ve had a full day, I’m tired, and not good for much other than Netflix and snacking.
I have the energy to enjoy my alone time in the morning.
Rounding the corner, I head to the coffee machine, but as I scoop some beans into the grinder, dark forms loom in the corner of my eye.
I glance, seeing four men sitting in the dark at the kitchen table.
I gasp and jerk, dropping my spoon as I spin around. “Geez!” I gape at my brothers all sitting at the circular table with Lucas standing to the left, behind Jax.
What the hell?
What are they doing here? And in the dark, not talking?
“What are you guys doing?” I blurt out, leaning back on the counter to catch my breath. Nearly gave me a heart attack…
My pulse jackhammers, echoing in my ears.
But then I pause. Hawke had called in the middle of the night. And they’re here now. Was he trying to warn me about something?
I float my eyes over all their faces, lingering on Lucas’s for a moment longer than the rest. “What?” I ask them.
Did something happen?
Jared sits between Jax and Madoc, his back to the window. I can’t make out his eyes, but he opens his mouth.
Madoc stops him, telling me instead, “We would…” He hesitates as if searching for words. “We would prefer that you not hang out with Noah Van der Berg or Farrow Kelly.”
I falter. Huh?
“And definitely not together,” Jax chimes in.
Madoc nods. “Yeah, definitely not together.”
What?
I dart my eyes to Lucas again, who draws in a long breath before shifting on his feet.
That’s why they’re here?
“It’s four o’clock in the morning,” I point out.
Jax sits up. “We—”
“Four o’clock…” I bite out, swiping up my spoon again. “In the morning.” Do they have any idea how crazy this looks?
I snap my gaze to Lucas. “You told them?”
How else would they have known I worked out with Noah and Farrow last night?
His eyes go wide. “I—”
But Madoc interjects. “Everyone knew except us,” he barks, shooting out of his chair and bringing me his phone.
He hands it to me, and I see Farrow, Noah, and me online, doing pushups. Lucas and his friend hover in the periphery, lifting weights but watching.
I cock an eyebrow at Madoc. This is what drove them to my house in the middle of the night?
I click on the comments, the first one saying #foreplay. It has eighty-nine likes.
I grit my teeth, recognizing the username. Dylan…
And everyone has seen the video. Everyone in town, anyway.
Customers seeing me splashed online in my tight clothes, seemingly flirting with two young guys…
I shove the phone back at Madoc. Turning, I grind the beans and start the coffee maker. “Hunter is very close to Farrow,” I explain calmly, “and Dylan is very close to Noah.”
If they’re good enough as their kids’ friends…
“Noah and Farrow aren’t trying to sleep with them,” Madoc points out.
I clench my teeth so hard my jaw aches. “I can make competent decisions.”
“And men like them,” Jax snaps, “are very good at making sure they’re the decisions beautiful young women make.”
“Good thing they weren’t in high school with you guys,” I choke out, but don’t look over my shoulder because Jared is being unusually quiet, and I’m afraid of why. “The competition would’ve been fierce.”
“Cute,” Madoc sneers. Then he moves away from me. “And what were you doing? Watching the whole time?”
I watch him charge for Lucas, who frowns. “Who brought her home?” he retorts. “I got rid of Farrow, didn’t I?”
He got rid of Farrow?
He’s why Farrow left all of a sudden?
But Madoc just keeps going. “I’ll deal with him.” Then he jerks his chin at Jared. “And you set Noah straight.”
I dig in my heels, coming around the island. “Don’t talk to Noah about anything!” I fire back, but my chin still trembles. “I mean it!”
Noah loves Jared. I won’t have him feeling like he did anything to disappoint him.
They sit there, and I resist the urge to look at Lucas. If he sees the little amount of water in my eyes that always happens when I get upset, he’ll pity me.
I gaze around at them, one by one, not really remembering when I first learned that Jared and Madoc’s lives sucked as kids because of my parents. But I do remember the moment I felt that I wanted to be a good sister. That I wanted to be worth it.
Opening my mouth, I try to think of what to say to get everyone level again. To calm the situation, get them to trust me, and make them happy all at the same time, but… I just shake my head. “I have work.” I exhale. “I’m not interested in Noah or Farrow.”
I twist around, back to the counter, and dig out a coffee cup. I slam it down on the counter, more frustrated with myself than them now. What do they think they can do if I want to date someone they don’t like? Ground me?
But I’m always the one to end the tension because I don’t want them mad at me.
I know they want the best for my life. They wanted me to be the one sibling who had the charmed childhood, so they could live vicariously, but don’t they see? It was in all of the trouble where they found out what they were made of.
My throat grows thick with tears. I barely know who I am. I always do what I’m told.
Jared still hasn’t spoken. He feels a million miles away right now.