Chapter 21
NORA
I’m wearing my glasses, but I can barely see straight, I’m so furious.
When we reach the lobby, Jude says, “Nora—”
“No,” I say. I do a quick scan around to see where we can go where I can feel free to lose my shit on him.
There’s nothing in this place. The lobby is huge and open and there are people everywhere.
Except…there’s a bar on the far side of the space, behind thick glass doors.
Inside, there are lights flashing, and I can hear the thud of loud music even from over here.
I walk over there at a clip, looking over my shoulder to make sure Jude’s following.
He is, head hung low. When we push inside, the music is deafening.
But the place is dark, filled with only a couple of people at this hour, all of them looking more interested in each other than us.
I stride to the back of the space, where there’s a wall next to an empty dance floor, disco ball spinning overhead.
It’s a weird place to have a talk, but I don’t think about it. I just spin on him and yell.
“Jude Edmonton Kelly! You are being an absolute piece of shit and it needs to stop!”
Jude looks so taken aback, that for a moment he just stands there sputtering. “You said you’d never use my middle name!” he shouts over the thudding electronic music.
His sister Cass named him after hearing about a place in Canada with the name. He never shared it; not even the media had ever picked it up.
“The situation called for it. Now, listen. Did you see your son in there? Did you see what this never-ending anger toward Farrah is doing to him? He’s trying. She’s trying. Hell, even I’m trying. You’re the only one who isn’t.”
A couple comes out on the dance floor, laughing and twirling. People in love. Great.
“This place is too loud,” Jude shouts.
“That’s the whole point!”
He runs a hand over his head and lands with his hands on his hips.
“You know you’re in the wrong here, Jude.
I know you do. I know you have empathy. I know you want to help people.
I see the way you are with kids at your resort.
I know all about how you desperately wanted to run a foundation of your own.
Think about the na?ve young girl she was, and the mistakes she made. You were both there together. You—”
“I know, okay? I fucking know it.”
Even through the din, I know his voice is hoarse with emotion. I know it’s him he hates. Him he blames.
“Do you regret it happening, Jude? And think long and hard about answering that, because you know what it would mean if it never did. You know the person you would be if you hadn’t met her.”
His eyes bore into mine, but I can see the answer. When Farrah turned up with the baby, he’d pulled his whole life together. Without her, he might still be a washed-up ex-celebrity floating around far from home, feeling sorry for himself.
But most of all, without her, there’d be no Cap.
Jude leans back on the wall, his face a picture of agony. He mumbles something I can’t hear, so I step toward him and lean in.
“I’m sorry,” he says in my ear. His hands go to my hips, and it feels so good for a moment I’m dazed by the heat rolling through me at his touch. But I make myself pull back. “You need to say it to them first. And you need to let them go on this trip.”
Then I turn and walk back to the restaurant.
When I get there, Cap and Farrah are just leaving. Cap still looks so upset, and when he sees me, a tear does fall. I kneel down and give him a hug. “Your dad is coming to talk to you, okay?”
“Is he going to say no?” Cap’s voice cracks. It breaks my heart, and I have to work to keep that anger for Jude in check.
I don’t want to make him any promises, so I just brush his tear away. “Listen. I hope not. But if he does, how about we do something amazing, okay? Something right here at the resort. Maybe with the three of us?”
I look up at Farrah, who looks like she’s containing a thousand different emotions. This poor woman. When I stand up, I tell her I did my best with him, and I sincerely hope he does the right thing.
She nods. “Thank you, Nora. You know the trip—it is for him too. For him and you.”
My stomach plunges as I remember what she’d said on the lift—the thing that had gotten me knocked over.
She was trying to help me and Jude figure our shit out too. All I can do is nod.
Then Farrah’s eyes go over my shoulder. When I turn, I see Jude, looking hangdog, coming across the lobby.
“Good night, sweetie,” I say to Cap, kissing his forehead. Then I leave them on their own.
I consider wandering the hallways at the resort before going back to my room. I haven’t really explored it yet. But I’m wearing these uncomfortable heels, and what if I run into Gunther or worse, Jude?
My stomach does a jump at the thought of him.
Tonight was so intense. I feel the stretch of tension in my lower half at how much I physically want him, but also this tug on my heart from how easy it was to hang out with him again at dinner.
Then that heat in my chest at how careless he was being with Cap and Farrah’s feelings.
I end up heading back to my room in my stockinged feet, my heels hooked over my fingers. I take the long way, so I at least see a little more of the hotel. This will only be our third night here, but it already feels like so much more.
But I don’t take anything in. All I can think about is Jude.
Jude. Jude. Jude.
He texts me when I’m back on our floor, heading toward my room.
JUDE: I apologized. To both of them. Cap and I cried. I’m so sorry, Nora. I’ve been an idiot.
I hate when he talks about himself like this, but honestly he’s not wrong here.
JUDE: I said they could go on the trip. You were right. I have to trust her more.
JUDE: I have to see you, Nora. Please.
I don’t answer. I don’t know what to say. I go into my darkened room, tossing my shoes in the closet. My intention is to head to the shower. But instead, I walk to the door connecting our suites. I stand there, my arms braced on the doorframe.
I can’t knock. I won’t. But it’s like I’m pulled to him. Some magnet in my center is drawn toward him, needing to meet its match.
I lean my forehead against the door.
And then there’s a knock.
My stomach jumps.
It was a slow thump, vibrating through my body. The side of his fist hitting the door. A desperate, metered-out plea.
“Nora.” Jude’s voice is muffled. “Please.”
My hand shakes, but it acts separately from my brain. Or rather, my brain has powered itself down to only one single word: Jude.
I open my door.
Jude’s standing there, his shirt unbuttoned at the top, his hair coming loose from its tie, his eyes burning into me like fire.
He reaches a hand out, but instead of something gentle and soft like taking mine, he grasps the fabric of my dress at my waist and pulls me toward him, crushing my lips with his.
The kiss is hard, deep, and so intense my whole body electrifies—across my skin and inward too, in a sharp jag to the very core of me.
Jude’s lips are soft against mine, his tongue urgent and needy.
My dress is still fisted in his hand, and he pulls me backward, not breaking our connection until he’s slid me sideways, against the wall.
“Nora,” he rasps as he leans in and nestles himself into my neck. “Nora, Nora, Nora.” His lips graze my skin, his free hand pressed against the wall over my head. “You’re running through my veins, Nora.”
He wedges his knee between my legs, urging them apart. Finally, he lets go of my dress, sliding his hands down my sides, grasping my hips like he did before, only this time, his touch isn’t gentle and tentative. It’s raw and demanding. Needy and hard and soft at the same time.
“Is this okay?” he asks as he slides me onto his thigh. “Us? This?”
I whimper as heat zings up my legs, centralizing where my body meets his, in my very center.
“I don’t know, Jude,” I gasp as my body moves on its own, rocking against his rock-hard quad.
He’s so hard, all of him; the long lean body of an athlete still.
I tip my face up. “I can’t answer that for you. ”
Jude’s grip tightens on me, his fingers pressed against the flesh of my ass. He lowers his forehead onto mine. “That’s not what I was asking, Nor. I mean, is this okay for you, us doing this?”
Heat curls between my legs, but a warmth spreads deep in my chest, too. “Yes,” is all I can manage, my voice breathless. “Yes, I want it. But what about you? Your priest status?”
Jude grins, running a thumb along my temple. “I’m a bad priest.” Then he dips his head down and kisses me again, his tongue against mine, his hands sliding up my ribs.
“Wait,” I breathe, breaking the kiss. “You didn’t say it was okay with you; those still aren’t the words—”
“Nora.” Jude’s hands slide up to my face, cupping it in his hands. “I want to fuck you. Is that clear enough?”
My insides clench against the onslaught of fiery heat, and I nod. “Yes.”
Jude picks me up then, lifting me easily, and I wrap my legs around his waist. “I want to fuck you too,” I manage as he carries me over toward the bed.
“Nora Albright, was that a curse word?”
I laugh, and it loosens the nerves I didn’t realize were keeping everything coiled up tight.
Jude pauses as he reaches the bed. “You just tell me if you want to stop, Nora. Anytime, okay?”
I’m wrapped around his body, my forearms on his shoulders, my face an inch from his. And my need is so intense I can’t breathe. “I don’t want to stop,” I manage.
“Good,” Jude growls. “Because this is going to be fucking glorious.”
Then he tosses me onto the bed.