Chapter 1.20
The moment Miles escorted Caroline out of the room and closed the door after him, Elizabeth burst out laughing, incredulous at what had just happened. She could not believe Darcy’s response to Caroline Bingley, but she had no time to say a word before he kissed her again.
She hesitated less than a moment before she kissed him back.
Any restraint she may have had vanished.
Her mouth was closed and she moaned when he gently bit her lower lip and his tongue touched her, played with her, tantalised her until her lips parted enough to allow him entrance.
For a few moments she did not move, did not breathe, surrendering completely to his will.
Barely thinking, she wondered how it was possible that his sweet invasion aroused such frightening reactions inside every fibre of her body.
Then she stopped wondering at all, simply rejoicing in the pleasure of his touch.
His hand encircled her waist, slowly sliding onto her back, along her spine.
The thin muslin fabric offered little protection, and each touch made her skin shiver beneath his strong palms. His other hand rested on her face, close to her ear.
It did not remain still for long, however.
His fingers entwined in her hair, and his thumb fondled her earlobe until the sensation made her tremble, and unconsciously she moved closer to him until their bodies touched.
Then it was Mr Darcy who moaned deeply, and his lips broke the tormenting kiss to whisper hoarsely, “Elizabeth…”
She waited for the return of the kiss with her eyes closed, her head lying against the back of the sofa, her lips ready, moist and parted, waiting for him, inviting him…
But his kiss did not come. Instead, she shivered almost violently when his fingers started to slide down from her face to the line of her jaw, to her throat, to her shoulders, tentatively stroking each spot not covered by her gown, tracing a line of fire everywhere he touched her.
Her skin burned. He was not really caressing her; rather, his fingers brushed her bare skin so gently that she could not be certain whether he touched her or she merely dreamt it.
She opened her eyes and met his dark gaze, so close that she could feel the warmth of his quick breath.
His fingers began their tentative movements again and slid down to her neckline, stopping a moment and then resuming their voyage until they reached the edge of her gown.
Her eyes watched his, surprised, embarrassed, and wondering, silently asking what he intended to do.
However, his stare was darker than ever, and she could not understand his answer.
She closed her eyes again in complete abandon.
She had neither the power nor the desire to resist him.
She heard him whispering, “my love,” but this time his voice sounded different.
While she expected his moves to become more passionate and demanding, she felt nothing but tenderness.
His fingers retreated from that dangerous destination and returned to her hair while his lips returned to hers—soft, gentle, and with less urgency.
Darcy knew he had reached the limit, and not crossing it was a battle he had to wage against his own will.
And he had to fight not only his reaction but hers as well.
Her acceptance was more welcoming than he imagined, and his desire and need for her tempted him to progress to the limits she allowed.
When he had broken the kiss and looked at her, he knew he could continue as he desired.
It was beyond any doubt that, despite her complete lack of experience—or perhaps precisely because of it—her body betrayed her mind, and the temptation was stronger than his rational mind.
His only coherent thought was how to take her in the comfort and privacy of his room as the library was not the proper place to make love to her.
And then…she opened her eyes and looked at him. His intentions changed in a moment!
Yes, her eyes revealed her love, passion, and desire.
She herself was a picture of bewitching abandon, but he could see so much more in her gaze!
That desire was not a mere need for physical completion but a desire burning from her love.
She seemed so vulnerable to him and to her own passion.
In that instant, he realised that she did not know what to expect or how to fight against it without hurting him.
Thus, the way she closed her eyes again, surrendered to him, and allowed him to do what he wanted…
all displayed a gesture of trust towards him This was a trust he could not betray by using her weakness simply to fulfil his desires, no matter how much his those desires were generated by his powerful love.
She was alone with him in his library on the second day of their engagement.
Kissing her passionately, caressing her, teaching her the first steps on the path of physical pleasure—these were more than he had dreamed of a week earlier and certainly more than he could demand from her at that moment.
His lips then returned to hers with gentle tenderness, to comfort and assure her that there was nothing of which to be worried or frightened.
Shortly thereafter, he knew he had been correct in his assumptions and in his decision when he felt her begin to relax in his arms as the tension in her body began to subside and she responded to his kisses with greater trust and passion than she had shown previously.
They came to their senses some minutes later when the clock announced half past three. There were less than two hours for her to reach her aunt’s home, change for dinner, and return with her family.
Elizabeth rose from the settee in a hurry, trying to rearrange her gown, brushing her hands over it to smooth it. She asked for a mirror, and Mr Darcy showed her one hidden in a corner of the room.
“I must look wild…” she whispered, flustered, avoiding his eyes.
“No indeed. You look beautiful…and do not worry, no…damage was done.” He smiled daringly at her, making her blush.
But a moment later, he lowered his head slightly, stared at her, and put his hand close to her face.
Mesmerised, she felt—more than saw—his thumb brushing her lips as gently as a breeze’s touch.
“Well…almost no damage…”
“What…did something happen?” She sounded worried and hastened to face the mirror, while he leaned his head over her shoulder.
She could see for herself that her lips were red and swollen.
It was virtually impossible for anyone not to notice.
Unconsciously, she touched her lips with her fingertips while he did the same.
“Please forgive me, my love. I was selfish and inconsiderate. I should have known that something like this could happen. Is it painful?”
She tried to smile, not just to hide her embarrassment but also to assuage his worry. “No, it is not painful at all. Do not distress yourself. And it is not your fault. How could you have known—?”
But before she finished the sentence, a sudden understanding struck her and made her blush violently.
Lowering her eyes from the mirror so she could avoid his gaze—and fighting the unexpected knot in her throat that stopped her words—she could not refrain from asking, “Oh…I see… Does this happen every time…?” She could not continue, mortified by the implication of his words and by her own daring question.
She was surprised to see him quite easy and smiling, speaking mostly in jest. “I cannot tell. I have never been in the situation of kissing someone so much that this could occur, so I never have given it any consideration.” He added in a lower voice, whispering warmly in her ear, “In truth, I do not think I ever truly desired to kiss a woman before meeting you.”
She met his eyes shyly but still was not completely at ease. She forced herself to smile, not knowing what to do with his admission and not being able to think clearly enough to catch his true meaning, whatever that might have been.
Darcy placed a quick kiss on her hair, continuing to speak quietly. “Let me help you remove the necklace, and then I shall pour you a glass of cold water; it might help.”
Gently, he took off the necklace, and in doing so, his hands lingered, caressing her neck.
Then he put the jewellery in the box and handed her a glass of water.
“Elizabeth, we must discuss another thing before you leave so we can make plans with your father tonight. Our wedding day…” She gazed at him and only nodded.
“Did you truly wish to take into consideration what my Aunt Ellen said? I would not want you to feel forced to do anything solely because of social obligations.”
“No, William, I think Lady Ellen made a very good point in this. Do you…do you have any date in mind?”
“Yes, I do, but again, I ask you to tell me if you do not agree. I was thinking that the Season starts in the middle of March. So, if we were to be married in a month…or let us say six weeks, we would still have a little peaceful time to spend together before entering into all that tumult.”
“A month?” She looked at him with mixed feelings of surprise and fear. “I do not think we shall be able to make all the arrangements in a month. My mother does not even know yet, so—”
“Elizabeth…” His voice was calm and his eyes were full of understanding while his hand stroked her hair.
“My love, I can understand if you need more time to become accustomed to all this. I can imagine that it might seem a little frightening to be forced to change your life so suddenly, but do not speak of wedding arrangements, please. I can make all the wedding arrangements in less than a week if necessary. Just tell me what you want as you always have. You told me a little earlier that we must share everything.”