20. Stasi
twenty
Stasi
L iam’s always excelled at getting people out of their heads. He claims this keen intuition was born out of necessity, but I believe it’s woven into the very fabric of his being.
Which makes it hard for me to accept this warped view he has of himself emerging from beneath his armor.
Peeking over my shoulder, I watch Liam settle behind Beau on the bed, determined to vanquish whatever shadows latched onto Beau while we were playing in the rain.
Liam grazes his hands along Beau’s hips, running them up past his ribs and shoulders.
But that’s where his gentle touches end.
Fisting Beau’s damp hair, Liam shoves his head down onto the mattress. Wide eyes meet mine, dilated pupils nearly swallowing the ring of deep blue.
Liam reaches for a bottle of lube and slicks up his fingers. My clit throbs as he moves that hand between Beau’s cheeks. Beau writhes and claws at the sheets, trying to shove himself back on Liam’s hovering fingers.
“Think he deserves it, Stas?” Liam asks.
Beau pleads with me through his gaze. I nod, and the moan he releases when Liam finally breaches him has me pressing fingernails into my bare thighs.
Shifting on my knees to get some friction between my legs, I watch Liam move his fingers in and out of Beau in a tortuously slow rhythm.
Liam reaches for one of the silicone plugs, coating it with lube. I hold my breath while he makes it disappear inside Beau.
“ Fuck . So full,” Beau groans, dropping his hips to the bed to grind against it.
Liam grabs handfuls of Beau’s ass and lifts him back onto his knees, leaving red imprints on his skin. “Those curses are gonna turn into you begging for my cock soon enough, trouble.”
Dark, ravenous eyes slide to me next. A shudder wracks me as Liam prowls closer.
Where Liam was rough with Beau, he gently eases me down onto my hands and knees with a palm in the middle of my shoulders. He trails his fingers down each bump of my spine as he wedges a knee between my legs to spread them.
Naked and exposed, I have a thought to feel embarrassed, but then I look at Beau in the same vulnerable position and fall into a place of desire and nothing else.
All hard muscle and hot skin, Liam covers me with his body. He runs his mouth up my neck, halting at the hollow behind my ear. “Look at you, angel. So perfect for us. Gonna train you to take both of our cocks.”
Heat floods me from head to toe.
“Jesus,” Beau mumbles.
Liam guides my head to the side, pressing a kiss to the corner of my mouth. While I’m distracted, he touches a finger to a place I’ve never been touched before. He taps me there, then circles around and around to massage me. Whimpering, I slump down onto the bed.
“Oh, no. We haven’t even started yet.” Liam hauls me back onto my hands and knees. His finger returns to my hole, testing the muscle there .
“More, Liam.” I want to prove I can handle whatever he throws at me. I want every side of him.
Liam nips at my jaw. “An angel who wants to be bad, hmm?”
I can’t focus on words when he keeps smoothing his finger over my rim. He runs his tongue and teeth along my neck as he starts to push that finger, now slicked with lube, inside me.
“Relax,” he murmurs. “I won’t hurt you. Let me inside.”
Shutting my eyes, I give myself over to Liam fully. At first, when he pushes into the tightness of my body, I’m not sure about the sensation. It’s…strange, but the more he stretches me, pressing hot kisses to my neck and shoulders, the more I succumb to pleasure.
“You’re doing so good. You can take another.”
“Please,” I beg.
A second finger enters me. I practice a deep breath and let him work me open. I’m not sure how anything else will fit. But soon the slow movement of his fingers has me rocking backward, eager for more.
“ Liam .”
His teeth nip at my earlobe. “I’m going to plug you. Then you’re going to ride my cock. Understood?”
All I can do is nod. Words don’t exist anymore. Time and logic and thought don’t either. Nothing but pleasure gifted by this devastatingly hot, considerate man.
Liam carefully presses the cold plug inside me. I gasp as my muscles suck the toy into place. He kisses my spine, and then his body heat is gone, replaced with the chill of the air circulating the room.
When I sit up, I have to hold still for a few moments to get used to the sensation in my ass. I watch Liam walking over to an oversized black leather chair by the windows .
Is that piece of furniture new, too? Or was I not paying much attention the first night we spent in his room?
Liam sits down, a dark king on a throne. Moonlight bleeds through the cracks in the blinds, highlighting his sculpted, tattooed body. His thick legs are spread wide, giving a perfect view of his proud cock.
My mouth waters.
“Come here. Both of you,” Liam orders.
His sultry tone is a siren call we can’t ignore. Beau and I crawl out of bed to kneel at his legs. I’m not sure why I do it. I don’t think I would kneel for anyone else.
A toxic voice bubbles up in my head, seeking to make me feel wrong for what I’m doing. Dirty for doing these kinds of things with two men.
Liam leans down to capture my chin with his calloused hand. “Enough.”
My negative thoughts wither, crawling back into their dark holes.
“You’re safe with me, Anastasia.”
I nod, relieved that he knows my mind so well and can easily take control of it.
He takes control of Beau, too, sliding a hand into his hair and tilting his head slightly to the side. Beau’s practically boneless, desperate to be reshaped in the likeness Liam desires most.
“You will kneel here and watch me bury every inch of my cock into her pretty cunt. You will not touch yourself.”
“Fuck.” Beau wriggles, then winces from what I assume must be the plug hitting weird. Or hitting right . Precum glistens along the slit of his cock, and I have the urge to lean down and lick it up.
“Climb up here, angel,” Liam says sternly .
Gritting my teeth at the odd pleasure of the plug as I move, I situate myself on his lap. My knees settle on either side of his solid thighs, and I rest my hands on his stone-like pecs, spreading my fingers over his skin.
A nervous smile plays on my lips. “You’re like a furnace.”
The simple touch of his thumb tracing the curve of my bottom lip lights me up. Any second now and I’ll detonate. Shatter and rain down to the ground like a firework.
His hand wraps around my jaw, turning me enough to bring his mouth to my ear.
“ Sit ,” he commands.
With a sharp inhale, I lower myself onto him. It’s a tight fit with the addition of the plug, but he grabs my hips and helps guide me down until I’m fully seated on his cock.
I drop my forehead to his shoulder. “ Ungh . Liam. It’s too much.”
“You can handle it. You’re taking me so well. You’re going to take both of us so well one day soon.”
His husky, slightly wrecked voice has a moan slipping from my parted lips. Beau groans in response. I can only imagine the view he’s getting from his spot on the floor behind me.
“Stas. Look at me.”
My heart dips into my stomach as I straighten up and gaze into his near-black eyes. The amount of emotion swirling in them tonight has my pulse spiking.
Don’t give into hope. Don’t give into hope.
Does he know his armor is slipping? Should I tell him and save us all the gutting pain when this comes toppling down around us?
Because when he looks at me like this, I feel loved.
He gives so much to others through his actions. Adapts to whatever they need within his capabilities .
Has anyone ever told him that they love him in return? That he is worthy and desired and so fucking good ?
Two little furrows appear between his brows. I don’t want to lose him at this moment, so I start to move my hips. Liam’s hands grip my ass, squeezing and spreading me so Beau can witness the way our bodies are coming together. It makes my skin burn even hotter.
“ Fuck . This is torture,” Beau murmurs. “Can I please touch my dick?”
“Touch it and all you’re getting is your hand tonight,” Liam warns.
Between Beau’s whispered curses, Liam’s thick cock dragging against my walls, and the plug pressing on more nerves than I was aware of, I’m done for. Hot sensation builds at my core, curling my toes and tensing my muscles.
I slow my pace to keep from coming, but Liam isn’t having it. He regains control, slamming his hips up to strike deep and hard.
I’ve never been loud during sex, but Liam’s literally destroying me. His hand slides up my side to wrap around my neck, just under my jaw. With a gentle press of his thumb, he parts my lips.
“More of that. I want to hear you. Don’t hold it in.”
With his encouragement, I let go. I let him fuck the shame and the fear right out of me.
And then I’m detonating. Shattering. My vision goes black. I become nothing more than raw pleasure.
When I come to, Liam’s cradling me against his chest, the plug already removed from my body. He sweeps a hand over my face to brush locks of damp hair away. “You okay?”
My smile is lazy. “I don’t think I can move.”
I tip my head up to assess him, worried lines were crossed, and he’s about to snap up barriers. Instead, he graces me with a smile that wrinkles the corners of his eyes and shows off more of his white teeth than I’ve ever seen before. It’s everything.
He’s everything.
Liam tucks me into his bed. Then returns to Beau, still plugged on the floor. I pity him for having to wait so long, but I think I’m beginning to understand their dynamic in the bedroom.
Liam hauls Beau upright and bends him over the bed. “What do you need, trouble?”
Beau’s breathing is labored under Liam’s forceful touch, his eyes clouded over by something concerning. It makes my hands fist the sheets tighter.
Beau doesn’t have to say a word, though. Liam already knows . He moves Beau onto his back, looking down at him in that same overwhelming, vulnerable way he looked at me. Like he needs us to see the emotion in his eyes because the words won’t come out.
I swallow as Liam positions himself over Beau, pushing one of his legs up. His other hand slowly drags the plug free from his ass.
Immediately, Liam replaces it with his cock, still glistening from my arousal. Beau claws at him for more, and it makes my chest ache.
Liam’s given us more than I ever could have expected. But that doesn’t mean he’s ready to commit to anything beyond this. Invisible wounds don’t miraculously heal, and I’m not arrogant enough to believe that we’re going to be the ones to make them disappear.
And yet here we are, offering up our hearts anyway.
I just wish Beau would hang around long enough so we can pick up each other’s broken pieces when Liam decides he’s done with us.
Beau sucks in a breath as his muscles coil up. Seconds after, he comes all over his stomach and chest. It’s the most intense thing I’ve ever seen, heightened by the sight of Liam losing control as his hips slam hard and hold flush against Beau while he spills inside of him.
Liam kisses Beau’s chest before pulling out. “Gonna run a shower for us.”
Beau and I are left in a post-orgasm state in the bedroom. He manages to roll over, a hand reaching to stroke my cheek.
“Hey, sweetheart.”
"Hi, Beau," I whisper.
I get caught up in him, pain expanding in my chest at the thought of him disappearing one day. Is it normal to feel this much this soon for someone?
Can we sustain this?
Tears stick my lashes together. Even if Liam wins out over his demons, it wouldn’t be the only hurdle we face.
There will be people who don’t understand us.
Who criticize this part of me. This rebellious, carefree woman I’ve been burying for decades to garner attention and win approval because I had so little of it growing up.
“Stasi?” Beau asks, a note of worry in his tone.
“Sorry.” I blink back the heat in my eyes. “I’m happy, I swear. I’m so happy when I’m with both of you.”
He kisses my temple as he runs his fingers up and down my back. “I’m happy when you’re happy, baby.”
Liam returns to the bedroom and freezes at the sight of us entwined. Something indistinguishable flickers in his expression. He quickly hides it away.
He strides over to sink his hands into our hair. “You’re both a mess. Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up.”