Raise or Die: Raise You (Ride or Die #4)

Chapter 1 Parenthood

Gio

Who the hell would've thought that at twenty-eight, after swearing I'd be a professional racer, breaking speed limits and bones, my biggest goddamn problem would be finding the right lullaby.

Because now I'm not just a husband. Nah. That title lasted, what, a year? Now I'm a dad.

Yeah.

I've got this tiny two-year-old human standing in front of me, with lips shaped exactly like mine, eyes so freakishly similar it's borderline creepy.

Antonio. We had, and still have, the best surrogate anyone could dream of.

Marco's sister. Valentina. Fucking legend.

We were looking everywhere, stressing over it, and she just offered out of nowhere. Said, "I'll do it!"

Pregnancy went smooth as hell, she handled it like a champ, and now we're doing it again. Rava's turn this time. We're having a girl. Name… No clue yet. We've got time.

She's only three months in. Valentina lets us come with her to every appointment, every ultrasound, and I swear, Rava cries.

Every. Single. Time. He's ridiculous.

And I love him so much for it. Antonio might be my kid biologically, but he's got Rava's manners. Swear to God, the kid's a saint. He adores him, like full-on worships him. Every time Rava's out, he comes to me with those big eyes and goes, "Daddy, where Dada go?"

Breaks me every damn time.

His first word wasn't even "Daddy." It was "Vava."

Tried to say Rava out of nowhere one night while we were talking. Daisy was here. Burst into tears instantly. Like ugly crying.

Oh right, Daisy and Lorenzo got married! Last year.

My boy proposed under the fucking Northern Lights.

Absolute cinema. Daisy fainted. Literally hit the snow. I keep saying Lorenzo's gonna be the next one to faint, the moment Daisy walks in waving a pregnancy test at him.

Can't wait to see that chaos unfold.

Ricardo... the legend. The myth. The hamster. At Antonio's first birthday, someone thought it'd be a great idea to pop a balloon right next to him. Big mistake. Huge.

He died.

The poor bastard froze like he'd seen God. Lorenzo cried. Like, actual tears. Didn't go to work for two days. Mourned like we'd lost a national hero.

But hey, we made it up to him. A week later, we showed up with two new hamsters, Giuseppe and Giulia. Lorenzo swore he'd "never love again."

Five minutes later, he was handfeeding them sunflower seeds and whispering, "Ricardo would've wanted this." I swear, that man's built for drama.

A few months ago, Marco took on this massive court case. The kind that makes the news and has reporters outside in suits and ties and all that. And of course, they won.

All thanks to him.

Man went full beast mode in there. Did his thing, walked out like a boss. And Noah… Jesus Christ. He hasn't shut up about it since. He's out there flexing Marco to literally everyone. Clients, friends, random baristas.

"Yeah, my man won a case so big they're still talking about it in court hallways.

" He calls Antonio Tony, by the way. Like he's already a grown man running his own tattoo shop.

Every time he comes over, it's the same thing.

"Yo, Tony! You're coming to the studio with me soon, right?

Gotta start you young, man. And get a license already. "

Kid just blinks at him and drools. Since Antonio came home, everything's different. Me and Rava are closer than ever, but we've got way less time for... each other.

No more lazy mornings. No more staying up till dawn talking shit. Now it's mostly baby food, and a toddler who thinks 3 AM is playtime.

Do we regret it? Fuck no.

But we both feel the gap, the exhaustion, the missing us.

So we try. Little things. A hand on the back while passing in the kitchen. Random kisses. A quiet "I got this, go sleep."

We're not just Gio and Rava anymore. We're a family now. Rava's about to get home any minute. Antonio just crashed for his nap, thanks to the amazing lullaby I sang to him.

Well... technically, I was just listing the steps for changing a bike exhaust... But I did it in a sing-song voice, so it worked.

Kid's two. He doesn't know shit. I'm a phenomenal dad. But now I gotta be a good husband too.

I get up slowly, careful not to wake the little king. That's always the hardest goddamn part. I swear, he won't wake up when my bike roars outside, but if I breathe too loud, boom.

Eyes open.

Somehow, I make it out of the room alive.

Food. Right. Shit. I check the clock.

We've got about an hour before our son starts screaming again. So I start making his favorite steak.

…

I hear the door open. He's quiet, he knows Antonio's asleep. Walks in slow, smiling big. Waves at me. Whispers, "Hi, Fontana No. 1." I walk up and kiss him on the forehead. "My baby."

He grins. "Ooooh, you cooked? I could've done it."

I smirk. "Yeah, but this way we save time." I tilt my head a little. "Means we've got time for a shower together. You in?"

He makes that face. The shocked one.

"Is that even a question?! We haven't showered together in forever. Move your ass."

I laugh under my breath, grab his hand, and we're running to the bathroom.

The water's warm, but hell, not warm enough to chase off this December cold biting through the windows. Drops are sliding down Rava's chest.

My baby is glowing.

I push his wet hair out of his face, just to see him better. His face... I don't know how the hell it's possible, but it's even more beautiful than when I saw him again at twenty-two. He's twenty-seven now. And every goddamn year, he gets hotter. I swear.

I lean down a little. Press the softest kiss to his lips. He melts. Then pulls back with that dazed look in his eyes. I grab the sponge and start rubbing him down, slow.

"I was thinking," I murmur, "tomorrow we give Antonio to Noah and Marco for a few hours... and I take you out."

He smiles, eyebrows lifting. "You trust them with Antonio that long?! After that time Noah almost gave him a tattoo?"

I laugh. "Almost. He didn't do it though. Come on! I just want some time with my husband. Just us."

He makes that face, the ‘fine, you win again’ face. Kisses me back. Smiling. "Alright. Honestly… we deserve it."

"Exactly." I rinse the sponge off. "I'll book the restaurant as soon as we get out."

He nods. Then looks down. Back up. And he's got that look.

Oh my God. Yes.

I can't believe this is happening. I lean down and murmur in his ear, "You've got time, I think."

He nods. Drops straight down and takes my dick into his warm mouth. Fuck me, it’s so warm I feel my knees lock. This is like... like lying down after eight days of no sleep. It's comfort. It's bliss. My jaw goes slack, but I keep quiet.

Hold the back of his head, guiding him slow while he's sucking me off. But then I hear a tiny knock-knock.

We freeze. Both of us. Our eyes are wide open.

"Daddy??? Dada??"

Oh, no. I slam the water off. "Antonio... why are you up?" I ask, pretending I'm calm when I sound like a busted radiator.

"I miss Dada."

My baby. Rava covers his mouth. "I'm gonna cry. He misses me." He raises his voice, soft. "I'm here, baby!"

"What are you doing?"

Shit. "Uh… Dada was helping me with... something!" I say.

"Can I come?"

"NO! No, no—stay there, baby. I'm coming!" I blow out a breath, give Rava a quick kiss. "Rinse off and go sit at the table, okay? I'll put him down and be right back."

He nods, still laughing under his breath. I grab a towel, wrap it around my waist, and step out. Antonio's sitting on the floor playing with Blu, completely unbothered. "Hey, why are you out of bed, huh?"

"I miss Dada." I laugh, scoop him up. "Dada's gonna eat now, and when you wake up, you and Dada will play with your tootoos, okay?"

He calls his toy cars tootoos. Not sure why. We go back into his room. He's already half-asleep in my arms. "Daddy, I'm thirsty." I hand him his bottle. "Here, champ. Drink. Then sleep, okay? Dada will be sad if you don't."

He nods. "Sing for me again," he mumbles. "Alright," I sigh, sitting beside his crib. "But just one." I clear my throat. "Hmm... let's do the Vroom Vroom song, yeah?"

He smiles and nods, eyes still shut. So I start whisper-singing some completely random crap about Marco's and Lorenzo's bikes.

How they're so damn loud they could make the walls cry, and how my ears ring for two hours after they pass by.

For some reason, the kid loves it. Every time I go "vroom vroom," he giggles like it's the best track he's ever heard. He falls asleep halfway through the chorus.

I tiptoe out, close the door halfway, and exhale like I just defused a bomb. Time to get dressed. I swear, having sex or even doing anything remotely romantic these days feels like a full-on challenge.

If I manage to make Rava finish in under two minutes, or the other way around, I feel like a goddamn legend. Parenthood, man. Pure chaos and trophies.

I pull my shirt over my head and walk to the kitchen. Rava's already there with his elbows on the counter. "He's asleep?" he asks. I nod, drop into the chair beside him, and let my head fall against his shoulder.

Lulu jumps up on the other chair.

Poor girl's been having stomach issues lately. We've been running to vets nonstop. She still eats fine, still wags her tail, but she's sleeping way more now. I hope it's not what I think it is. I take a bite of steak, chew slow, then glance at him.

"You mad this is happening?"

He frowns. "What's happening?"

"That… our time's kinda limited. For certain… things."

He gives me that ‘are you out of your mind?’ look. "Mad? Are you kidding me? I love our life, Gio. Sure, I'd like a little more time for just us, but we knew what we were signing up for. We'll get through it. It's worth it. I'm not complaining. I love you both too much to complain about anything."

I smile. Cause I really needed this. I lean in, wrap my arm around his neck from the side, and kiss him slow. "I love you, Ravioli." He grins, presses his forehead to mine. "I love you too, baby."

2) Uncle Lolezo

Rava