Chapter 6 #7
The guy goes to the bathroom. Gio presses his lips together, trying not to laugh.
Marco just stares at Noah. Noah notices. He tilts his head. "You good, baby?"
Marco nods, eyes still glued to Noah. "I'm fine. How much longer do you need?"
Noah laughs and pulls him into a hug. He pets Marco's hair like he's calming down a terrified golden retriever. "Why, you in a hurry? You want a tattoo too?"
Marco doesn't even answer, just nods into Noah's chest.
Noah kisses the top of his head. "You can't. Sorry. You drank yesterday."
"Excuses," Marco mumbles into his shirt.
Gio leans forward. "No, seriously, listen to him." He looks at all of us. "Do you remember that party years ago? When they gave me this tattoo—" he points at his ankle "—the fucking ravioli?"
I already start laughing.
"The next day it was leaking ink everywhere and I couldn't figure out why," Gio says. "Maybe because I drank my entire bloodstream in alcohol."
Noah cackles. "I must've been drunk as hell too not to stop that. Or I wasn't there. I don't remember. That whole day is just a blur. Loud blur."
"That day was fucking insane," Lorenzo sighs, nostalgically feral. "We should recreate it. Same place, same chaos. But this time with Marco."
Noah tightens his arms around Marco like someone tried to snatch him. "NO. Absolutely not. I'm not handing him over to you animals. Especially you, Lorenzo. You'll both die and I'll lose the love of my life and you."
I swallow dramatically. "Wow. Hi to you too, best friend. Don't drown me in affection like that, I might choke."
Noah snorts and peels himself off Marco just enough to move. He drops down next to me on the couch and bumps his shoulder into mine.
"Sorry," he says. "You're right." He turns his head toward the others. "We'll go out tomorrow. Just us. No clowns."
Gio gasps. "Excuse me—"
"Without them," Noah repeats, eyes on me now. "You and me. Like in Canada." He throws his arms around me in the most dramatic side-hug, half tackling me, chin on my shoulder.
I crack up but hug him back anyway, slipping an arm around him. I forget sometimes how important this idiot is to me. Then he does stuff like that, and my brain is like, oh right, this one's family too.
The guy comes back from the bathroom and Marco just stares at him. Noah clocks it immediately. Poor thing. Honestly, if Gio had to tattoo some dude's asscheek and hold it stretched for an hour, I'd cry too.
Yeah. No question. Noah looks from the client to Marco and starts laughing under his breath.
He walks over, hooks a hand around Marco's neck, pulls him in and kisses him quick. Then he leans in and whispers something in his ear that none of us catch.
Whatever it is, it works instantly. Marco comes back to the couch all soft and smiley. Lorenzo stares at him, offended. "You whore..."
Before anyone can answer, the door swings open and Daisy walks in with Antonio on her hip.
"Hiiiiiiii!" Antonio yells like a siren.
Marco gasps. "THE CHILD." He jumps up. "Come here, love of my life. Oh my God, I missed this juicy little face so, SO much."
He takes Antonio and drags him to the couch, and he and Gio instantly start playing with him, forgetting about the ass crisis.
31) Delete The Photo
Gio
Today I'm probably getting divorced. And it's not even my decision. It's fully his. Rava doesn't feel the same anymore. I know he doesn't.
Today proved it. His actions proved it. This is how it starts. First, he doesn't shower with me one time, and then suddenly we're signing papers and dividing furniture.
I step out of the bathroom still drying my hair with a towel and walk into the bedroom I share with my soon-to-be ex-husband so I can get dressed.
My ex-husband is lying face down on our bed, scrolling on his phone. He glances up at me. "Did you wipe the water off the glass?" I don't answer. I just keep getting dressed.
"Gio, come on," he says. "Are we really doing this all day?" "Yes." He sighs, amused already, which pisses me off. "I literally showered half an hour before you," he says. "That's why I didn't come in with you. Relax."
"I'll do whatever I want," I tell him. He laughs. I finish pulling my shirt on and walk over to the bed. I drop down next to him, but instead of putting my head on the pillow, I plant it right on Rava's fat ass.
He goes still for one second. "I'm taking this as your way of apologizing—"
"Shut up," I say into his ass.
He laughs harder. He sets his phone down and shifts a little under me. "You're being insane."
"You betrayed me."
"Oh my God."
"Don't 'oh my god' me. You did."
"I didn't shower with you ONE time."
"One time is how it starts."
He turns his head a little. "How what starts?"
"The collapse of a marriage." Now he's fully laughing. "Don't laugh, you dick. This is serious."
"Tell me exactly what I did," he says.
"You made a choice." He stares at me for a second, then drags his eyes down my face. "Gio."
"No, let's really get into it," I say, getting comfortable on his ass. "You knew I was going in there. You knew I'd be naked. You knew there was steam, opportunity, and ROMANCE involved. And still, you left me to shower alone like some divorced father."
He covers his face, laughing into his hand. "Wow," he says. "That's a new one."
"I'm in pain."
"You are dramatic."
"I'm a victim."
"Of what?"
"Neglect."
He just looks at me. "You done?" he asks.
"No. If you loved me, you would've at least considered the romantic value of a shared shower."
He bites the inside of his cheek. "I did consider it. But I actually wanted to wash my hair in peace for once without you pinning me to the wall for twenty minutes and making out with me."
I stare at him. He stares back. That is such a valid answer that it makes me angrier. "So now I'm a burden."
He laughs again. "That's not what I said."
"It's what I heard."
"You literally hear fake things all the time."
"You say fake things all the time."
He puts his hands on my face, and he starts slapping my cheeks lightly. "I don't want to break up with you," he says.
I try to keep my face straight. "That makes one of us."
He arches a brow. "Oh really?"
"Yes."
"Get off me then." I don't move.
"Exactly," he says. My phone vibrates in my hand.
Lorenzo. Three photos.
I open the first one and immediately scream and throw my phone across the bed. My hand flies over my mouth. My eyes go wide.
And then I start choking. Fully choking on laughter.
"What?" Rava says, instantly panicked. "What happened? GIO, WHAT HAPPENED?"
I can't answer. I'm folded in half, one hand on my stomach, the other over my mouth, tears already coming out of my eyes. I'm making these awful dying sounds and that only makes it worse. Blu starts barking like a maniac because of me.
"Tell me what happened," Rava yells again, but now he's laughing too because I'm clearly not dying, just losing my mind. "Why are you screaming?"
I try to talk. I physically cannot.
Every time I look at the phone lying face down on the bed, I break all over again. Then it starts ringing. Lorenzo calling. And that absolutely finishes me.
I think I might actually die in my own bedroom because of Lorenzo. Rava snatches the phone off the bed before it falls.
"Gio," he says, trying not to laugh now too, "seriously. Tell me." I'm crying at this point. Actual tears running down my face.
Antonio stops playing in the other room and appears in the doorway.
"Dada," he says, looking at Rava. "Why is Daddy laughing?"
"I don't know, bean," Rava says. "He's not telling me." I wipe under my eyes and suck in a breath that does absolutely nothing to help.
"Uncle Lorenzo," I wheeze. "Um—" I lose it again.
Rava groans. "Oh my God."
"He—" I point uselessly at the phone. "He probably confused me with Aunt Daisy and sent me something... special."
Rava's whole face changes. His eyes go huge. "No."
I nod. Instantly laughing again.
"No fucking way."
I nod harder.
Antonio looks between us, confused but invested. "He sent you gift??"
Yeah. Nudes.
"Yes, baby," I say, still half dying. "He sent me a gift that was probably meant for your aunt."
"Or maybe not," I add through the laughter, because honestly with Lorenzo, who the fuck knows anymore.
Blu is still barking. Antonio is now fully inside the room, staring at us with that little confused face that somehow makes everything ten times worse.
"Did Uncle Lorenzo make funny face?" he asks.
Rava covers his mouth. I am one second away from blacking out from laughing. "Yeah," I say weakly. "Something like that." The phone starts ringing again.
Lorenzo. Again.
Rava looks at the screen and immediately starts laughing too hard to function. "Oh my God," he says. "Answer it."
"I can't."
"Answer it."
"I physically can't."
"Put him on speaker."
"No, because if I hear his voice right now, I will ascend." The phone stops. Blessed silence. For two seconds.
Then someone starts pounding on the front door like the police are here. Not knocking. Attacking. Rava and I both freeze. Antonio jumps.
Blu loses his mind even harder and tears out of the room barking like he's about to defend the family honor.
"Gio!" Lorenzo's voice screams from the other side of the door. "OPEN THE DOOR RIGHT FUCKING NOW."
I stare at Rava. Rava stares at me. And then I collapse into laughter all over again. "Oh my God," Rava says, already laughing too. "He came here??"
"He came here."
"Why is he here?"
"He wants his dick back, I guess."
"GIOVANNI!"
"Do not say that in front of the damn child," Rava says, still laughing. Antonio looks thrilled. "Uncle Lorenzo here?"
"Yes," I say, wiping tears from my face. "Unfortunately."
The pounding comes again, louder this time. "GIO I SWEAR TO GOD IF DAISY OPENS HER PHONE BEFORE I FIX THIS, I WILL THROW MYSELF INTO TRAFFIC."
That does it. That's the line that kills me.
I bend forward so hard I almost slide off the bed. Rava grabs my arm, laughing just as hard now, trying to keep me upright while also not dying himself. Blue is still going feral.