Chapter 12 #2
Valac shrugged. “It’s my home. I don’t imagine it’s quite what your guild taught you to think it is, but the Pit isn’t particularly pleasant for the souls there.”
“The Pit?”
“Where the souls are tortured for their wrongdoings.”
Julian’s eyes widened. “That’s just one section of Hell? What’s the rest of it like?”
Valac tipped his head back toward the starry sky. “Our sun isn’t as bright.”
“Y-You have a sun in Hell?” Julian sputtered.
“We do. Think of it like a mirror of Earth. The sun is fainter, the world darker. The Pit contains the human souls that come there for judgment, and the rest of Hell is where the demons live. It isn’t an eternity of punishment, as I think your religion teaches.
The souls are only there for as long as it takes them to realize the harm they caused during life and repent. ”
Julian turned to face him. “Wait, what? What if they don’t think they did anything wrong?”
“Many start out that way. Some take longer than others. But often, souls already harbor guilt for the things they knew were wrong. Those souls are punished until they come to terms with their wrongdoings, and then they go on to find peace.” He smiled at Julian’s dumbfounded expression.
“Hell would have to be a very big place to contain every human soul who ever sinned since the dawn of time.”
“Right.” Julian cocked his head to one side. “I guess I never thought of souls as tangible things that needed space to be… stored or housed. What about Heaven? Does it have to contain all the souls from Hell that find peace as well as the ones who didn’t pass through Hell first?”
“I can’t say. I haven’t been there.”
Julian chuckled. The hand not holding Valac’s trailed up the demon’s forearm, absently following the path of one undulating black tendril across his skin.
“Right. I guess it stands to reason that they have a similar method. Maybe the souls there experience true happiness for a certain amount of time and then… expire or something. Return to the cosmos or the fabric of reality.”
Valac turned their hands, letting Julian follow the tendril across the underside of his forearm. “That sounds nice.”
“What about the rest of Hell? You said that’s the part where the souls go. What about where the demons live?”
“You’re very curious for a human.”
Julian laughed brightly. “Yeah, sorry. It’s not everyday you get to ask an immortal demon all the burning questions you’ve ever had about the afterlife.”
Valac chuckled. “We have homes much like you do—well.” He gestured with his free hand toward the electric skyline in the distance.
“Not exactly. We don’t have electricity.
We don’t even need food while we’re there.
Hell itself sustains us, though many indulge themselves by feeding on the souls in the Pit. ”
“Whoa. But you need food while you’re on Earth?”
“Yes. Having a physical body on Earth is different than existing in Hell. It’s a spiritual plane.
While we’re on the surface, we need food and water and sleep, although not as much as a mortal.
There are certain demons who wouldn’t need to eat food or sleep even on Earth, but not many of them bother coming to the surface. ”
“So do you have a house?”
“I do. A small abode in what I suppose you’d call our capital, Pandemonium.”
“No concentric circles filled with sinners, then?” Julian asked cheekily, casting him a smile.
Valac smiled patiently. “No. That was an entertaining piece of fiction, though.”
“Never read it,” Julian said. “Learned about it, was urged to read it, but I never got around to it. I was too focused on my physical training. I wanted to be a paladin so bad.” He shook his head, chuckling. “I had no idea what I was in for.” His tone was laced with bitterness.
Valac snagged Julian’s exploring hand and raised it to his lips.
“I’m sorry it wasn’t everything you hoped it would be.”
Julian smiled weakly. “Thanks. To be honest, it was for a while. I loved feeling like I had a purpose, like I was doing something good for the world. That’s what makes all of this hurt so bad, I think.
My squad was my family for so long. We fought shoulder to shoulder for years, and I felt like I mattered.
When I walked away, I thought I still had friends there, even if we wouldn’t see each other every day.
But I haven’t heard from anyone since I left.
I don’t know if they’ve been ordered to stay away from me, or if they’re worried about trying to reach out.
Or maybe they just don’t actually care as much as I thought they did.
Maybe our friendship was always conditional on us being in the guild together.
I don’t know. It just doesn’t feel great, being so alone.
” He huffed sourly. “Which is what I thought I wanted when I left. I thought I wanted the guild to stay away from me. I just didn’t know that included them. ”
Valac’s lips brushed Julian’s knuckles when he spoke again. “I’ve almost reached Astaroth. Then I will return as quickly as possible.”
And then Julian would never be alone again.
Their eyes met, and Julian leaned in, his eyes moving rapidly back and forth between Valac’s. He lifted his free hand, grazing Valac’s cheek. His fingers were warm, and Valac’s eyelids fluttered.
“Why do your eyes glow? The other demons’ eyes don’t.”
“It is a manifestation of my power.”
“The shadows you can summon?” Julian’s fingers trailed up the swell of his cheekbone to the black lines swirling around his ear. “Like these?”
“Yes. Only behemoths have these abilities, because we guard the paths to and from Hell.”
“Do you see many attacks on those paths?”
Valac smiled. “Not anymore. It’s been a long time since anyone tried to breach one of the gates, but since we aren’t needed elsewhere, we continue to patrol. That’s why Astaroth sent me to investigate Lilith’s death. He could spare my absence.”
“Sounds lonely.”
Valac hummed, tilting his head to invite Julian to continue his gentle exploration. “I’m not lonely right now.”
Julian’s eyes crinkled with shy happiness. “Neither am I.”
Valac’s heart swelled. It felt like sunlight might leak from his pores. He’d never felt anything like this before, lightweight and carefree. This human made him feel things he didn’t think were possible. He had never known companionship like this, and he would do anything to keep it.