Chapter 7 #5
Feeling like she had more questions now than when she arrived, Toni headed back to Sophia’s car to wait for Ghost to bring out her briefcase.
* * *
Since Cross had another engagement that night, Ranger was flying solo in Morgantown.
Becks offered to go with him, but he was already feeling like a burden to her, so Ranger declined.
He knew she was worried about him. He never wanted to add to that, but she also had to live her own life.
She was about to be a mom, and stress over him couldn’t be easy on her.
Ranger hinted that she and some of the ol’ ladies should do something relaxing that night before he left for his meeting.
Besides, he wanted to stop by the trailer to see Toni, but unfortunately, she hadn’t been in. Despite that he’d been in possession of her phone for nearly twelve hours, Ranger didn’t have her number or know where she was. It was disappointing, and he resolved to try again after his meeting.
He didn’t share that night. It was enough to listen, hearing the stories, fears, and assurances of the others in the room.
Unlike the AA meeting he attended in Mount Grove, this one was more specific to narcotic users.
In a way, he attributed it to visiting with another motorcycle club and being at his clubhouse.
Both were motorcyclist groups, but only the VDMC were his people.
The overall atmosphere was sad that evening, with the news that a member’s grandson had started using.
She cried, barely able to stand upright, as she shared, blaming herself for not being able to stop him and voicing her fear that her own addiction influenced him to use.
It was a scary reality that Ranger had never considered.
Would any of his club nieces and nephews, would Ghost and Becks’ kid or kids, ever be influenced by him to use?
Even if he kept his sobriety? The very thought turned his stomach so much that he thought he might hurl at one point.
He never wanted anyone he loved to go through this hell. Whether they chose to use or not, he did not want any of them to ever be sitting in a chair beside him at a meeting.
Partway during the meeting, his phone buzzed silently in his pocket, and he opened it to find it was a notification from a new app Keys and Rose had developed so any adult in the club could track each other or the club kids.
The notification was specifically telling him that Specs, a prospect, was near.
While it normally didn’t ping anytime a member was next to someone else, it did for the prospects so everyone knew who was around to call on.
Ranger frowned at his phone, cursing Ghost for sending him a babysitter.
As tempted as he was to text Specs and tell him to leave, Ranger did not want to be on his phone during someone else’s share.
So he put it away, resigned to send the prospect away after the meeting and before Ranger got outside.
He of all people understood Keys’ paranoia, and if it was anyone else but himself who was the one currently being stalked, Ranger wouldn’t be so testy about it.
But fuck, it was him, and he knew it was because Cross wasn’t with him tonight.
Talk about feeling like a child. The club didn’t even trust him to come to an NA meeting without Cross holding his fucking hand.
Ranger glanced up at the ceiling, closed his eyes, and let out a long breath while counting to fifteen in his head.
Putting himself in Ghost’s shoes for a moment, he forced himself to consider that after that morning, and Ranger’s confession that he was struggling, Ghost might have felt obligated to send someone to watch Ranger’s back.
The acknowledgment did not dissipate his anger completely, but it did wane it.
Fucking Colby and his calming tricks.
After the meeting, Ranger helped to pack up the chairs. Unlike the church in Mount Grove, this was a community center where the rooms could be used for various purposes, so it was good practice for them to clean up after each meeting.
He shook hands with a few people, but was not in the mood to stay and chat like Cross usually made him do. He’d been a bartender for nearly eight years, and now he couldn’t stand small talk. Times certainly had changed.
Ranger was swept up in the exodus of those leaving the room, and nearly missed the tall figure standing up. She’d been sitting on a hallway bench, her eyes fixed on the door Ranger had just walked through.
What the fuck?! Emotions like embarrassment and shame came over him a moment before anger took their place. Why was Toni in the hallway outside his NA meeting? Had she followed him?
Her wide, dark eyes flicked to the person exiting behind Ranger, and then back to Ranger. She gripped the strap of her purse at her shoulder like it was a shield as she stepped towards him. “What… What are you doing here? Why are you here? Did you follow me?”
Even with the dark emotions swirling in his head, his feet still took him right up to her like there was no other place his body wanted to be. “Funny,” he answered dryly. “I was about to ask you the same question.”