Chapter 34
Ian woke up to his mate’s delicious scent wrapping around him and instantly visions of places filled his mind.
And along with them came a deep feeling of homesickness that rolled through him.
He’d experienced these visions and feelings throughout his childhood.
No one could explain them—or maybe no one would explain them to him.
He suffered with them as an adult but after learning about his heritage, he now knew where those places were—Scotland.
While growing up in the Scandinavian Mountains, his mother knew who he was, knew the places he saw in his visions and knew why he was homesick but said nothing.
A brief flash of anger burned through him but he rejected it.
No, that won’t change anything. My parents did the best they could and I love them…
even though they’re not my birth parents.
“What’s the matter, babe?” Colton asked, his voice still heavy with sleep.
Both were exhausted after the last forty-eight hours and had left the others to get some much needed rest. But Ian found sleep sporadic at best. His mind was too wired to settle down.
The revelations from Oracle about him would be enough to freak anyone out, but then to discover the people he thought were his parents really weren’t had been too much for him to handle.
He tried to do what he’d done his entire life—lock these thoughts away in a mental vault—but now, they refused to be restrained. What the fuck am I going to do?
Finally responding to Colton’s question, Ian said, “Nothing’s the matter, I can’t seem to sleep.”
“What’s bothering you? And don’t tell me nothing because I can tell there’s something on your mind.”
Rolling over to face Colton, Ian searched the face, looking for what—he didn’t know.
But something was wrong. It was the same feeling he had when he was told his visions were just dreams. He knew they weren’t and when he tried to explain they were memories, no one listened.
Only it turned out, he was right and everyone had lied to him his entire life. And fuck if I don’t feel that again.
Then it came to him—the healing of Jackson. He’d been lied to by Jackson, Steel, and, most importantly, his mate.
Ian knew it the moment they told him Colton used his natural healer’s ability to save Jackson.
No one knew he’d spent a year working with a natural healer and there was no way a natural healer could’ve save Jackson, who was far beyond the reach of any mortals or even shifters.
The only way was by intervention of the gods.
Then he remembered the flash of bright green light and the buzzing in the hospital room in Mexico when he was biting Colton, trying to save him—just before he fainted.
“You lied to me!” he said. “In Mexico and up here, about Jackson! You lied to your fated mate! I can’t believe you’d do that.” Ian turned over and stood, looking down at the man who was just like everyone else in his life—a liar.
“Babe, I was going to tell you today. Jackson told…”
“Oh, so you can tell the truth to Jackson but you can’t to me…
the one who is supposed to mean more to you than any other person in the world.
” Ian stormed into the closet, grabbing his jeans while keeping up his tirade.
“You know what,” he said as he hopped back into their bedroom, yanking his jeans on, “I’ve had enough.
My whole life has been a lie. Shit, even what I am has been a lie and I thought maybe…
just maybe…when I found you, there would be one person I could trust. But no, you’re just like the rest! ”
Ian headed for their door. Stopping short, he whipped around and shot his final salvo, “I’m going for a run. When I get back, I want you and your shit out of this room. I don’t care where you go but just stay away from me.”
What the fuck just happened? Colton’s eyes were round and his jaw dropped as he listened to the door slam loud enough to wake the dead.
What the fuck just happened? Slowly, he went over everything he said and found nothing to justify Ian’s reaction.
Then examining Ian’s words, he groaned. His mate had figured out he’d lied to him and for some reason, instead of letting him explain, Ian had kicked Colton out of his life.
He sat up, stunned at being rejected by his mate.
He’d been wrong—he could see that now. But I was doing it for the good of my mate.
Or was I? Well, he was freaked out when he woke in Mexico to find he had a mate and powers from the gods.
He thought he hid his reaction, just as he always did when incidents happened that were not normal—he had lots of those times growing up. Especially, when he healed someone.
During summers when he was working as a nurse’s aide, he was used to being called in when shifters had trouble healing.
The doctor would tell him to do his “voodoo” and he’d chuckle and then lay his hands on the sick shifter.
And yet, no matter how many times he did it he was freaked out, thinking something was wrong with him.
If only his parents or Jackson had revealed the truth—that he was normal but with the rare ability to heal.
Thinking about Jackson’s decision not to tell him still caused his anger to rise.
Oh my gods! Yes, that’s how Ian feels! I lied to him.
I’m no better than everyone else in his life! Shit!
Understanding now why Ian rejected him, Colton tried to figure out how to convince his mate he was sorry.
Lost in thought, he failed to hear the soft knock at the door but eventually, it registered.
Hoping it was Ian, he hurried to the door and flung it open.
“Oh, it’s you,” he said dejectedly to Jackson.
“Yes, may I come in?”
“Sure, why not?” Colton grabbed his sweatpants and pulled them on. “Is something the matter? Is Daniel okay?”
“I’m fine and so is Daniel. That isn’t why I’m here. Why did Ian shift and run into the woods without you?”
Colton dropped to the floor, head in his hands and said, “I screwed up. Badly. Okay?”
Jackson sat on a chair next to Colton and patted his brother’s shoulder. “Tell me what happened.”
Colton sighed, quiet for a minute, before he explained how he was sure Ian felt betrayed that he was lied to, because Colton had felt the same about Jackson.
“I do understand why you didn’t tell me about my ability, Jackson…
to protect me…but that doesn’t make me feel any better.
So you see, I understand Ian’s anger. I understand his feelings of betrayal and, what makes it worse is I’m his fated mate…
the one the Fates gave him because I’m the other half of his heart. ”
Jackson waited until Colton looked at him before asking, “What are you going to do?”
“I’m going to grovel. I was wrong and even though I told myself I was doing it for his good, it was really for me. I didn’t want to have the power of life and death so I figured if I ignored it, it would stay my secret and no one would ever know.”
“Colton, you are still you and always will be. Do you remember when I told you and your brothers that I could have pups?”
“Yeah, I remember and I also remember Zane calling you an abomination. I just don’t want my brothers to feel like I’m a freak.”
“I understand that. Ask Steel sometime about how nervous I was when we drove back to our house because I dreaded having to tell my brothers who I was.”
“Really? You seemed so calm.”
“That’s a story for another day. But during the meeting do you remember Cody asking Logan what he thought of my gift?”
“Vaguely.”
“Logan said, ‘Jackson’s still what he’s always been to me but now he is just a little bit more.’ And that’s you too. You’re Colton but now just a little bit more.”
“I never looked at it that way. I guess I was so freaked out, I lost my perspective. When Oracle spoke with me, I told her it was a burden and not a blessing. She told me one day I’d be grateful I had the power.
And she was right. I knew the moment I used it to save you I was meant to have it.
And from then on, I never regretted it. The only problem is I never told Ian and I’m not sure he’ll forgive me. ”
“My advice? Give him some time to think it over. It’s very hard to reject a fated mate. I know, I tried. When he comes back, talk with him. Ian also has a number of big shocks to deal with so he’ll need your love and support.”
“How do you know I love him?”
“Bro, it’s written on your face clear as day. Now, I’ve got to get back to Daniel. I’m sure it’s time for Steel to handle his poop patrol duties.”
“Poop patrol? Great name. I think I’ll get Steel a t-shirt with it on it.”
“Just don’t make it brown.”
Laughing, Colton gave Jackson a hug and whispered words of thanks into his ear. After his brother left, he flopped on the love seat in the sitting room, planning how he’d convince his mate to forgive him.
~/~/~/~/~
Ian had been running for hours. Initially, his anger propelled him but now it was sadness.
What the hell am I going to do? He knew rejecting his mate wasn’t a possibility.
The Fates made sure of that. So now what?
More lies in my life? Is that my future?
Finally, his wolf gave up and collapsed in a bed of leaves.
Half buried, Ian shifted back. His body demanded sleep and he gave in.
~/~/~/~/~
Pacing in their room, and not knowing what else to do, Colton was frantic with worry.
Ian hadn’t come home yet and Colton refused to consider the possibility his mate had left him.
Finally, he decided to search for him. He tried reaching Ian through their mind link, but there was no response to indicate Ian was alive.
No, I have to be positive! Nothing happened to my mate.
He opened the door, now eager to find his mate and bumped into Cody standing with a hand raised, about to knock.