Chapter 20 #2
Kash tsked, bracing Zain’s weight until Jordan grabbed a wheelchair — hauled him into another room. Kash helped him onto the exam table, crossing his arms when Zain tried to stand. “Sit your ass down until someone says you’re not dying.”
Zain scoffed. “I bruised my ribs, I’m fine.”
“And as soon as someone with a few letters after their name confirms that, I’ll let you pass.”
“Thanks, Gandalf , but I don’t need someone to tell me what I already know.”
“That you’ve got broken ribs? Possible internal bleeding?”
Zain huffed, grabbing his side when he swore something sliced through his skin. “Shit.”
“We’re way past that.” Kash helped him back, motioning for Jordan to grab someone. “Relax. Try to breathe. Foster and Mac are watching over Saylor. Looks like it’s mostly the hypothermia with some bruising on her side. Not a damn roadmap like yours, but she’s gonna be sore for a while.”
“Sore’s fine. Dead…”
Kash sighed. “Nowhere close to dead. You, on the other hand…”
“As long as she’s breathing…” He closed his eyes, each breath searing through his chest. “Don’t leave her alone, just in case those assholes from the other boat come knocking. ”
“We’ve got your back, brother. Hers, too. Now, rest before you bust out a rib all alien style through your chest.”
Zain relaxed against the thin pad, breath tight in his chest. Pain drawing him under. He reran what she’d said in the chopper, trying to puzzle out if she’d meant it or if it really had been the hypothermia talking. A bunch of thoughts getting hijacked inside her head.
He sighed. He could worry about it once she’d regained consciousness. When his thoughts weren’t shaded in black and blue.
When he’d finally convinced himself, he deserved more than a second chance.
He deserved her.
“Zain.”
Zain bolted awake, grunting when his ribs ground together, tightening his chest until he thought he might pass out. He blinked, frowned at Saylor standing next to his bed. “What’s wrong? Are those assholes from the boat back?”
He tried to toss aside the covers, but she stopped him with a gentle hand on his wrist.
She shook her head, her lips still slightly bluish. “Even half-dead, you’ve got me on your watch. No one’s here. At least, no one bad. How’re your ribs?”
He blinked again when the room spun, a warm sensation easing the tightness in his chest. “I’m fine. What time is it? ”
“Early.”
“Why are you dressed?”
Saylor glanced over her shoulder. “He’s on pain meds?”
Kash moved into view. “He busted several ribs and bruised his lung. They gave him morphine. It should wear off in a few hours.”
Zain frowned. Why were they talking about his lung? About meds? And why was she looking at him as if she’d seen a ghost?
He smiled up at her, fading before she gave his arm a light squeeze. “Come to bed.”
She leaned in. “I’d love to, but…” She glanced over her shoulder. “The Coast Guard wants me to go through what happened. Fill in all the blanks, now that I remember that night.”
Zain shifted his gaze. Some jerk in a uniform stood in the doorway, scowl shaping his thin lips. He didn’t nod, just stared at Zain as if he’d just told them he ate puppies for breakfast. “Who’s the stiff?”
“Rear Admiral Fleming.”
“Rear Admiral?” He tried to shake off the fuzziness in his head, but it didn’t budge. Thoughts swirled around, tumbling over each other until she squeezed his arm again. “That sounds like more than just a talk.”
“It’s complicated. Apparently, they can recall me for some kind of debriefing. I didn’t catch it all.” She shifted on her feet. “They’ve mentioned something about reinstating me. A promotion. My own command. I’m not really sure, I just… ”
That voice inside his head started yelling, the words quickly sinking into all that warmth. “You’re leaving?”
Had he gotten that right?
“I’m just going to talk. Greer’s coming with me.”
“But…” He scrubbed a hand down his face, grunting when it pulled against his ribs. Nothing made sense, that thick feeling inside his head messing everything up. “Do you want to go back?”
She looked down, twisting the edge of his blanket. “I… I don’t know. I didn’t leave because I was done, I just…” She looked up. “What do you think? Is it crazy?”
He did his best to palm her cheek without passing out. “I think you don’t want to look back in ten years and feel like you settled.”
Her lips twitched, those voices in his head warning him, again. “So, you’d be okay? If I went back?”
Hell no.
Had he said that out loud? Imagined it?
“Commander O’Conner.”
She turned when Fleming’s voice echoed through the room, stabbing pain through his temples. “I’ll be right there.”
Fleming tapped his watch. “We need to go. Now.”
She glared at the guy, then focused on him. “Zain, I…”
Zain forced a smile, secretly wondering if he was simply sneering. “It’s okay. If you love someone, you gotta set them free, right?”
Her mouth gaped open, her eyes wide. “What?—”
“Commander.” Fleming took a step into the room. “We’re out of time. ”
She took a step back. “I’ll call you as soon as I’m done. I just didn’t want you to wake up and wonder where I was.” She darted back — planted a soft kiss on his lips. “Thank you. For everything. I’ll call.”
She walked out, favoring her left side, arms wrapped around her waist. Zain stared at the door, all the words getting jumbled in his head as he faded into that numbing warmth, drifting until the voices in his head started screaming, startling him upright.
Pain arced through his chest, his next breath nearly dropping him.
Kash tsked, moving in beside him as he held him in place. “Are you nuts? You broke your ribs, jackass. Don’t move like that unless you want to spend another night in the hospital.”
Zain relaxed against the bed, images colliding in his head until one finally took shape. He glanced around the room, a shiver weaving down his spine. “Where’s Saylor?”
Kash pursed his lips, glancing at Foster and Mac when they ambled through, coffee cups clenched in their hands. “She’s at the Coast Guard office in Portland.”
“Portland?” Zain pushed Kash’s arm aside and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. “What the hell? What if those assholes come back? What if the doctors missed something? Was she even cleared to leave?”
Foster darted forward, blocking Zain from actually slipping off the bed. “Seriously, Zain. You’re gonna give yourself a concussion on top of everything else. In fact, I’m sure you all have one from that stupid sonar weapon. Saylor’s fine. Greer went with her. Atticus, too.”
Zain coughed, nearly puked. “Atticus? Isn’t he still hobbling around?”
Mac joined Foster. “He didn’t go as her bodyguard. He went because he’s got connections, and he wanted to make sure everyone involved checked out. Greer’s there for protection.”
“Chase had better have Greer’s back or we’ve got a problem.”
“Greer went as the sheriff, Einstein .” Chase limped into the room, looking as bad as Zain felt. “I offered, but…”
“Should you be out of bed?”
“I got a second opinion.”
“Whose? Yours?”
Chase sank onto one of the chairs. “At least, I didn’t break any ribs. Just a mutual bruised lung. Spleen, too, but nothing I can’t handle myself.”
“Christ.” Zain raked his hand through his hair, embracing the sharp stab through his chest. It helped him focus. “Why is Saylor in Portland?”
Kash frowned. “You don’t remember?”
“Remember what? I was strung out on morphine.”
“She came in here a few hours ago. Told you she’d been recalled for a debrief regarding the Vigilant . All the shit that went down with Maddox. That they wanted her back.”
“Back? She’s reenlisting with the Coast Guard?”
Damn.
And she’d told him that ?
Had he balked? Begged her to stay? Done anything to show how much he cared? Had she left anyway?
Kash grabbed his arm. “Easy, brother. You look like you did last night before you tanked.”
Zain palmed the bed, forcing in a few shallow breaths. “I need someone to start talking.”
Kash sighed. “Technically, it sounded as if they were considering this past six months as her being on leave or something. I don’t think she really knew. But you told her it was okay.”
Dread punched Zain in the gut, and he had to close his eyes to keep from puking. “I said what?”
“You told her you didn’t want her to look back in ten years and feel like she’d settled. That if you loved someone, you had to set them free.”
“And you let me babble on like that?”
Kash shrugged. “It caught us all off-guard. But the real question is… are you gonna just let her walk away?”
He grunted, wishing he could move without screaming. “It sounds a lot like she already made her decision.”
“Bullshit.” Mac pushed past Foster. “She didn’t leave because she wanted to.
She went because she’s scared there’s nothing left for her here.
Her business. Her loft. Everything’s gone.
Except you, and you apparently wished her well.
” Mac held up her hand. “I know. Morphine. But she wasn’t asking you if you thought she should go.
She was asking you to give her a reason to stay. ”
Zain met her glare. “Which I would have if I could have strung two thoughts together.” He paused, working out the next few steps in his head. “Mac, do you still have connections at the Coast Guard? Maybe a few chits you could call in?”
“What have you got in mind?”
“Clearance.”
She grinned. “I think that I can help you out with that.”
He waved at Foster. “I need pants. And a hoodie. A lift, too.”
Foster held his ground. “Zain. The doctors would like you to stay a bit longer?—”
“Chase?” Zain looked over at the man. “Am I going to drop dead if I leave?”
Chase groaned. “Not as long as you don’t pop a blood clot.”
“Then, what are we waiting for? I’ve got something I need to say, and I’m not letting her go until she tells me to bugger off to my face.”