Chapter 26
Ifeed Reggie his seeds one by one, trying not to let jealousy eat away at me. I’m sure there's a very logical reason why Raze’s, stunning, mature ex-girlfriend came here to see him today. Reggie squawks at me to let me know I’m not going fast enough and when the door to the hut opens, Raze strolls inside as if nothing’s happened.
“You left without sayin’ goodbye,” he says, taking off his cut and hanging it by the door. I turn my back on him and face the other way, refusing to give him a response. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anyway. Beg him to tell me what she said, yell at him for lying to me about never having his heart broken?
“Peyton, d’ya wanna talk about the fact Stacey stopped by?” he asks, sounding perfectly reasonable, but I haven't sat here and built myself up for a reasonable conversation, I’m worked up for a fight.
“Peyton.” He says my name again, sounding slightly more agitated, and when he steps around my body so he’s in front of me, I turn my head in the opposite direction and continue to feed Reggie his seeds.
“Peyton, will ya stop feedin’ that dumb-ass bird and look at me?” I look down at Reggie in shock but still ignore him.
“You know what? I came down here to have a grown-up, civilized conversation with you about what just happened, but clearly you ain’t ready to do that.” He starts marching back toward the door and snatches up his cut.
“You lied to me,” I speak up before he can leave. “You told me that you’d never had your heart broken, and then, there she is. The woman who did it, walking straight past me and into your office.” There, it’s out and he scratches the back of his neck as he walks back toward me.
“She had somethin’ she wanted to tell me,” he explains in a low, soft voice that I’m sure is supposed to reassure me.
“That’s it, she had something that she wanted to tell you?” I laugh at him for thinking that, that even touches on being an explanation.
“Okay, what do you think she came here for?” He loses his patience and snaps.
“I don’t know but you were very quick to take her into your office.” I fold my arms and look back at him, accusingly.
“Wait, you… you think...” He starts to laugh at me and it frustrates me even more.
“Peyton, there is nothin’ between me and Stacey anymore.”
“Except the fact she broke your heart and you felt the need to lie to me about it.” I make my point very bluntly, despite feeling like a hypocrite.
“I didn’t lie to ya, I just didn’t wanna get into it,” he explains.
“Because what she did still hurts.” I don’t know why the thought of that upsets me so much. Everyone has a past and his was bound to have involved another woman at some point.
“No, what she did is irrelevant to me now, but bein’ with you and allowin’ this to happen…” He flicks his fingers between us. “..has forced me to open myself up to that chance of it happenin’ again, and that scares me.” I can read in his face that he’s being brutally honest, but it doesn’t stop me from feeling deceived.
“Well, I hope you and her figured it out.” I smile back at him sarcastically before heading over to the kitchen to clean something, as a distraction. I know that part of me is overreacting, but I’ve never been in a relationship before. I have no idea how to handle all the new emotions I’ve been feeling lately.
“Okay, I’m sorry,” I sigh, and when I spin around, and see that he’s gone. I feel an ache in the pit of my stomach, and the depressing ‘caw’ that Reggie makes just about sums everything up.