Nine
I was in a really difficult position, because of what Tori had told me. I didn’t want to keep any more secrets from Reacher than I already had to, and this was just another brick on the pile weighing me down.
She was right though; Ice shouldn’t be taking the blame for what they were doing. And that was why, when Reacher went off to meet with some of his brothers, I watched the infirmary for Doc to leave for the day, because he lived off-compound with his two kids, and then I sneaked in.
It wasn’t kept locked, because it was, after all, in a fucking biker compound, and the place was heavily guarded. I knew that what I was about to do would hit the fan in some way or another, but I had to do it. For Ice. For Ryder. And for Tori.
I went straight to a cabinet that looked like the biggest, so the most likely to hold medicines. It didn’t. It was packed with way more bandages and wound dressings than I thought any place should hold, but it wasn’t what I needed, so I moved on. There were some big wide drawers, that were unlocked, and when I pulled them open, I saw creams, ointments, and painkillers. All standard stuff.
There was a stack of pills and cocaine in a box in another cupboard, clearly the stuff that Ice had been storing up, but the syringes Tori had described were not there.
Damn. I was running out of time and places to look. I rummaged carefully through the remaining cupboards, finding nothing. From there, there was just a desk in the corner that I guess Doc must use to sit at when he’s not treating people. Two drawers were locked. Crap. I looked around for anything I could use to force the locks, even though I knew it would definitely prove that he’d been broken into.
I found a letter opener on his desk and fiddled around for a while, before I tried just jamming it into the old drawer lock, and hit it with a paperweight I found there. The lock didn’t unlock though, it broke. It released, and partially dislodged. Shit. No way to hide that.
I pulled the drawer open, and was relieved to find a plastic bag, containing two large syringes filled with yellow liquid. I felt a chill creeping down my spine as I stared at them. At least the needles were capped, so wouldn’t pierce the bag. I took a breath as I reached for them. I didn’t really even want to touch them, but I had to. For Ice. For Tori and Ryder.
I pushed the drawer closed, trying to make the lock look less broken, but it was a lost cause. In the end, I gave up, and sneaked back out of the room, heading straight for Tori’s room, the bag tucked under my t-shirt, and uncomfortably pressed against my skin. It felt wrong. Unpleasant. Even though it couldn’t get at me through the cap on the needle, it felt like something bad that I wanted away from me.
I tapped on Tori’s door, relieved when she answered.
“You alone?”
She nodded, gesturing for me to step inside, but I didn’t move.
“Ryder’s on his way back, but he has to meet with Reacher first.”
I pulled the bag out from under my shirt and passed it to her with a grimace.
“Never ask me to touch this stuff again. I feel unbelievably creeped out that I even had to look at it.”
She nodded, moving the bag out of my sight instantly.
“Thank you so much. Honestly, you did the right thing.”
I wasn’t so sure about that, but I was just as sure that the alternative would have been no better.
“Promise me you guys won’t do anything stupid with that. The fact that Ice had it, rather than you guys, worries me. Be safe.”
Tori nodded again. “We will. Look, I really appreciate this. Let me pay you for doing it.”
“Forget it. I don’t even want to think about this ever again.”
She chewed her lip. “I’m sorry if this makes things difficult between you and Reacher. I don’t want that. I don’t want anyone to suffer for what… for my issues.”
“Me either. I need to get back, before I’m missing when he gets back. Again. Mind you… last time worked out really well, if you know what I mean.” I wiggled my eyebrows and she giggled.
“Only an idiot would miss your point, and I’m definitely not an idiot.”
I stared at her arm, hiding the drugs behind her back.
“I’m not so sure about that, babe.”
We heard heavy footsteps coming up the stairs, so she hurriedly closed the door, and I started walking towards the stairs.
“Hi Alicia.” It was Ryder, and he looked exhausted.
“How’s Ice?”
He sighed, and even that sounded like pure exhaustion.
“Same. Silent, still, pale as fuck. It’s so weird. I mean, the guy never sleeps. I… it’s weird that it’s all he can do now. He’ll hate the fact that we’ve all seen him like this.”
I patted his arm gently. “He’ll be fine. He has all of you behind him, right?”
He nodded. “You were here to see Tori?”
“Yeah. Girl talk and stuff, you know.”
He glanced down the stairs at the sound of a voice bellowing his name. Reacher .
“Fuck. I don’t even get five minutes?”
I shrugged, walking past him to stare down at Reacher, who was glaring up the stairs, but hopefully couldn’t see me, or I’d be wondering what I’d done to piss him off. I mean, that he might already know about, since he couldn’t know about the infirmary visit, right?
“I can distract him for a few minutes if you want to see Tori.”
“Nah… let’s get this out of the way, then I can spend the rest of the evening with her.”
Reacher watched us approaching, a deep frown on his face. He twitched in my direction, like he wanted to grab hold of me or something, and I almost went straight to him, except for feeling like my betrayal of him was tainting me right now, painted across my skin. I prayed he’d never find out.
“Ally? Why were you uh… what are you doing out of our room?”
I pointed behind him at the bar, forcing myself to focus on him, and not what I just did to save someone else’s relationship, maybe at the expense of my own.
“I thought I’d grab something to eat if you’re gonna be in meetings?” He stared at me for a long moment, then cursed, turning his glare on Ryder.
“Give me fifteen minutes and I’ll join you. Can you order for me?”
I forced a carefree shrug.
“Whatever.” I watched his jaw clench, and grinned, loving the way it felt to push him. I was already looking forward to the retribution later. Maybe I hadn’t just thrown everything away after all, maybe he wouldn’t find out, and we could just be happy.
Reacher
F ucking woman loved pushing my buttons. It pissed me off that I had to put that on hold to deal with Ryder.
“My office, now.” I didn’t wait for a response, striding across the hall to my small office, leaving the door open for Ryder as I sat down.
“Close the door.”
He did, and then he grabbed a seat, figuring he was here for the long haul.
“I’m only going to ask you one question, asshole, and I expect the truth. No matter how much you don’t want to tell me. Got it?”
Ryder cursed, rubbing his face with both hands.
“Jesus. You know, don’t you?”
Hell . Suspicions confirmed.
“That shit is for you and your old lady?”
He nodded, staring at the floor. “You have to understand, Pres. She’s my old lady, and whatever she needs, I’m gonna fucking give it to her.” I understood the compulsion, but this shit was too messed up to even comprehend.
“So, just to make sure my old man brain is getting this right. You’re willingly letting that woman inject you with an unknown fucking substance, so she can keep raping you?”
I saw disgust on his face, just like I could feel it in my gut at the thought of this sick shit.
“See, I knew you wouldn’t understand. This is why it’s a fucking secret, and what two people do in the bedroom is their fucking business, Reacher.”
He was standing now, his fists clenched at his sides.
“Brother, your reaction to my comment tells me you know how wrong this is. Maybe you’ve even known for a while, but you’re holding back on dealing with that, because it keeps your lady happy. Are you seriously telling me that never experiencing your sex life with her is gonna be enough for you? It wouldn’t be for me.”
He dropped heavily onto the seat he’d leapt out of.
“It’s not like that, Pres. We tried that, sure we did, but it wasn’t enough. You were right about that. Watching a video after the fact, and jerking off wasn’t enough.”
I groaned. At what point is the phrase ‘too much information’ not even enough to cover it?
“I don’t need details, fuckface.”
He smirked briefly, then turned serious again.
“The stuff in the syringes is what that mafia guy used on Tori.”
What the actual fuck! I thought this couldn’t get any more fucking twisted, and yet here we are.
“How the hell did you even get hold of that shit?”
“Ice.”
Fucking hell. Fucking Ice. Is this what got him stabbed to shit?
“Did you get your brother almost killed, Ryder?”
He shook his head. “It can’t be about that. He’s shagging some tech there to get hold of the stuff. It’s not like that would get him attacked. Reacher, it’s the only way I can be with Tori. It lets me feel. It lets me feel her fucking me. It’s intense. If we don’t have this, I think she’ll retreat into the black hole again. I can’t do that to her.”
I rubbed at my own face for a minute, taking time to press the piercings in my eyebrow, letting the small bite of pain pull me out of the whirling thoughts.
“Anyone else know about this?”
“Is it gonna come down on them if they do? Because if so, I’m not telling you a damn thing. I’ll take the heat for this. Just me. Not even Tori.”
I glared at him. “Listen, you stupid prick. This could be a real issue, if anyone outside of the club finds out. Best way to prevent that, is to make sure nobody else inside the club knows.”
“Ice, Torch, and Has-Been. That’s it, and the other two found me out, or they wouldn’t know at all. They don’t know about the stuff from the lab. Just that we tried the method Tori used.”
“So when Has was glaring at you earlier, I take it that was him figuring shit out with that big brain of his.”
Ryder nodded slowly. “He blanked me for most of the day, so probably. He was pissed about the other stuff as it was. They both were.”
“As they fucking should be.”
“Hey, it’s worth you knowing that Ice didn’t want to help either. He tried to talk me out of it, and he tried again every damn time. He’s not to blame here.”
I got up from behind my desk.
“Trouble is, the damage might already be done, brother. I trust that you understand your little supply chain ends right now.”
“Fuck. Honestly, Reacher, we’re not hurting anyone.”
I pointed at the door. “Fuck off, and do some serious thinking, brother. There’s no precedent for this in the club rules, but I might have to add something.”
Ryder sighed, heading for the door.
“You realise that you could be destroying my relationship with my old lady, right? Taking away from us the one thing that makes us a couple.”
“Get out of my sight, Ryder. I need time to think this through too.”
I sat there after he left, wondering what the fuck I was supposed to do with everything he’d just told me. And that’s when Doc appeared in my doorway.
“I thought you left for the night, brother?”
He stepped inside and closed the door.
“Left my damn wallet here, and wanted to get a takeaway. Uh… we have a problem though, Pres.”
I raised my eyebrows, and he sighed.
“Someone broke into my desk in the infirmary, and they took the syringes from my drawer. The syringes that only a few of us know about.”
Fucking hell. I slammed my hands down on the desk. That stupid son of a bitch. He just fucking sat there and looked me in the face, like he hadn’t already stolen the shit back.
“What the hell is happening to this club? This is fucking unacceptable!”