Twenty-Eight
W hen I woke up, I was in a stark room, with an irritating beeping sound, and a sterile smell that told me exactly where I was. A hospital. In a bed. Alive. I blinked fast, until the blurriness eased off, and I could focus again.
I was alone, and it was surprising how awful that felt, but then Raoul’s words came crashing back. Reacher. Reacher was dead . So of course there was nobody here with me. For me. The club would be mourning him, and I would be the last person anyone would care about right now. There was no feeling lonelier than realising you had absolutely nobody in the world who cared if you were alive or dead.
I tried moving, and winced, as a sharp pain in my stomach stopped me. I found the controls for the bed, and pressed the one that looked like it’d call a nurse, or someone to tell me what was going on.
It was a few long minutes before a nurse appeared.
“Ah you’re awake, love. How are you feeling?” I swallowed, my throat dry and sore. I opened my mouth to speak, and only managed a croaking noise.
“Looks like someone tried to strangle the life out of you, love. Your throat must be so sore. Let me get you some water.”
After some water, I was able to whisper, but that was all.
“What happened?”
The nurse checked the tubes in my hand, and fussed with the bedding.
“You were admitted with a single stab wound, and underwent minor surgery. Everything will be fine, love.”
Oh . I vaguely remembered the pain.
“How did I get here?”
She frowned. “I’m afraid I don’t know, love. My shift only started an hour ago.”
I wanted to ask if anyone cared that I survived, but I didn’t want to know the answer.
“Anyone you want me to call for you, love?”
I wish. I wanted Reacher by my side. I wanted him always by my side, and my heart broke all over again at the knowledge that I’d never see him again. A crushing wave of grief washed over me, and I began to sob, even as my stomach screamed at me to stop everything.
They sedated me in the end, and I woke hours later from a blissful sleep, where my dreams were full of the man who wasn’t dead at all, but was right by my side.
Waking up was the worst part, because I didn’t want to be awake. I didn’t want to be alive . Not without him.
Someone tapped on the door, and poked their head into the room. It was Stitch.
He grinned at me, stepping inside the room, and how could he even smile, with Reacher dead? I thought they all loved him like a brother, a father even. Surely he hated me for causing his death, for taking him from them all.
“Hey.” My voice sounded as flat and dead as I wished I was.
He approached my bed, stopping beside me, his hands slipping into his pockets.
“I know I’m not who you hoped to see right now.”
I felt tears filling my eyes again. The only person I wanted to see was the one person I’d never see again. How could life be this fucking cruel?
“Oh hell, I’m sorry, Ally. It has to be me for now, but as soon as we can move-”
“Stop. I… I know I’m not a priority for your club, especially now… especially with… Oh god…” I bit back a sob, and squeezed my eyes shut.
“Hey, come on now. You know how pissed Reacher will be if he thinks I upset you.”
He grabbed my hand and squeezed it gently.
“I… Oh god, I wish he was here.”
Stitch patted my hand awkwardly.
“He would be. You know he would, if they’d just let him move. Torch is trying to keep him where he is right now, the stubborn bastard.” What?
My eyes popped open, as hope started to fill my chest, my heart racing faster.
“He what?”
Stitch frowned. “You didn’t hear what happened? Jesus, how could you have heard… I’m such a dick, sorry. He collapsed.”
I stared at him numbly.
“Collapsed.”
He nodded. “Scared the hell out of us.”
“He’s… he’s not dead?” Reacher’s alive?
He laughed, and the sound filled me with joy, because he didn’t die!
“Takes more than a near heart attack to get rid of a stubborn bastard like him, Ally. Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. He’s more worried about you. Damn near lost his shit over you though, when he heard you were hurt. Those fuckers stabbed you?”
I was still caught up in the fact that Reacher wasn’t dead. He was alive. The man I loved was still alive! Raoul lied!
“He’s really not dead?”
Stitch looked more confused by the moment.
“I was just in with him, Ally. He’s, well, not fine, but doing better by the hour.”
“He told me he was dead.”
Raoul, that bastard. He’d taunted me with that, used it to make me give up hope, so that he could break me down.
“Who did? That cartel bastard?”
I nodded, blinking back the tears that wouldn’t stop coming.
“I was… he’s really alive?”
Stitch grinned. “I promise. He’s gonna be pissed as hell that you woke up without him here waiting, but the main thing is that you’re both alive.”
I tried sitting up then, and winced at the reminder of my injury.
“I need to see him.”
Stitch groaned, waving his hands at me to try and stop me moving.
“Jesus. You two are as bad as each other. Can I catch a break for five fucking minutes? I’ve been awake for thirty six fucking hours.” He dropped heavily into the seat beside me, and he looked exhausted. Beyond stressed. On the edge, even.
“Are you okay?”
He leaned back and rubbed his hands over his face, trying to wake himself up, I think.
“Let’s see… One brother was in a fucking coma, my President in a fucking cardiac ward, and his old lady stabbed by the cartel. Who, by the way, are a bunch of psychotic assholes, and may still try coming after us.”
I grinned suddenly, despite everything, because he sounded so melodramatic, even though he had plenty of reason to be exhausted. It wasn’t the right reaction, but relief was practically singing through every nerve ending in my body. Reacher was alive.
“I’m sorry, Stitch. Been a hell of a day, has it?”
He shot me a glare. “No shit.”
I pointed at my stomach.
“I got stabbed, remember. I think that trumps your day.” He barked out a laugh, but even that sounded exhausted.
“You should get some rest, Stitch. Can you tell Reacher I miss him though? No… wait … tell him an old man like him should be avoiding too much excitement.” He’d appreciate that, I knew it. He’d know it came from me, because who else would say something like that to him?
He laughed again as he stood up.
“Believe me when I say there’s no way in hell I’m telling him that.”
Reacher
S he was alive. I just had to keep telling myself that, and absorbing the fact, and reminding myself that my inability to get out of this fucking bed, and be at her side, wouldn’t change that. It was the hardest thing I’d ever done, because I should be right beside her.
Now that my strength was starting to return, I was really fucking tempted to find her room and bed in with her, because she needed me beside her. Stabbed . She was fucking stabbed, and where was I? On my back. In a fucking bed.
“Jesus. You should be sleeping.” Stitch looked dead on his feet.
“Go home and rest, brother. Nobody touches that bastard until I’m there.”
He nodded, gesturing behind him.
“Micro and Has-Been are here, watching over Ally and Ice. Ryder is gonna be watching your back for you.”
“Jesus, Ryder? Really?”
Stitch sighed heavily, like he was fed up with just about fucking everything at this point.
“He’s a good man, and you damn well know it, Reacher. He’s made mistakes, but haven’t we all? He’d die to protect you, just like any one of us.”
I held up a hand. “I’m sorry. I’m being a bitch, I know. I just… I want to be with my fucking old lady.”
He nodded, propping himself up against the doorframe.
“She’s awake, and she’ll recover. The worst part was that she thought you were dead, for some reason.”
“What the fuck?”
“ She was in bits . Seems that bastard Raoul must have known you’d been taken ill. Either that or it was just a lucky fucking guess. Either way, she was… brother, she fucking loves you. When you’re both better, just fucking make the most of that, yeah? Any way you can. Life is too damn short to be apart from someone who loves you that much.”
I was monumentally pissed off that the bastard had used my illness to try and break her. I couldn’t wait to tear his skin from his body, as he screamed for mercy.
“Brother, you’re far more eloquent when you’re groggy as fuck. Tell me you’re not riding home. Get someone to pick you up in a cage, yeah?”
He yawned widely, and nodded.
“Yeah, actually thought I’d grab a cab from here. There’s a taxi rank just down the road.”
“Call a prospect, brother. It’s what they’re for.”
“Can you stop bossing me around, so I can just get the fuck home?”
I waved him off, and lay back against my pillow. I should have been sleeping. It was late, so fucking late. Late enough that I’d worry about my VP getting home in that state of exhaustion.
Ryder poked his head in next.
“Need anything, Pres?”
I nodded. “Can you make sure Stitch gets back safe? I don’t want him riding, or trying to fucking walk. He’s like a zombie. Come back to me when you’ve sorted that.”
He nodded, and disappeared as quickly as he’d appeared. The thing about being their President, is that they’re all like my fucking children, and I care about each and every one of them. Their safety. Their happiness. Their survival. Jesus. It was no wonder I’d nearly had a damn heart attack. Wasn’t there enough stress already? Without Ice, and Ally being in danger, and hell… Ryder and his psychotic fucking old lady…
He returned eventually, with two cups from the vending machine in his hands, and he passed me one; coffee! I took a deep breath in through my nose, starting off my caffeine boost with the scent. Finally .
As I cradled it in both hands, muttering my thanks, probably sounding like I’d been handed the holy grail, Ryder cursed and facepalmed.
“You’re not fucking allowed coffee, are you?”
I smirked. “Try taking it back, and I’ll break your face.”
“Jesus.” He sat down beside me. “At least it’s not as strong as you normally have it. It’ll probably taste like piss to you.”
I took another deep inhale of the scent.
“Honestly, I’ve been dying without coffee.”
“Don’t even joke about it, Pres. You had us all worried sick. Fuck’s sake, you know we can’t do this without you.”
I glanced at the doorway, wondering if I’d get caught with the coffee. Honestly, I think it was more about stalling, so I didn’t have to answer him straight away. Comments like that hit me where it hurt, and truthfully? I’d scared the shit out of myself too.
“Look, I’m sorry, okay? For my part in all of this. For whatever stress Tori and I have caused you. For anything that helped push you over the edge. Believe me, it’s the last thing either of us wanted.”
I stared at the poor guy, who looked just as worn out as Stitch, or me.
“I understand, brother, I do. I mean, I have an old lady now, and I’d have dragged myself from this bed, and staggered out there to try and save her, if it had been possible. We’ll do anything for our ladies. I’m just not sure that what you guys have going on is healthy, or safe, and you both know it too.”
He was slumped in that chair, staring morosely at his drink.
“I know, Pres, I know. Believe me, I want nothing more than to be able to fuck her the way I want to. I need to. I’m not the kind of guy to let a woman take the lead. Not normally. I guess that shit changes when it’s the right woman though. The one who matters more than everything. I never dreamed I’d submit to anyone, but if that’s what she needs…”
Jesus. This is too fucking private for me to hear.
“Brother, you don’t have to tell me.”
“I feel like I need to, like I need to explain why things are so fucked up with us. It’s how it has to be, at least for now, and, you know… you’re right… why can’t she just tie me to the bed and fuck me-”
The nurse who popped into the room caught the last of his sentence, and blushed furiously. It was the one who’d flirted with Stitch when she last saw him.
“Fuck. I’m sorry.” Ryder actually blushed too, and I found myself fighting a grin.
“Don’t mind him, love. He’s shutting up now.”
She took a breath. “I just wanted to let you know that if you remain stable, we’ll probably be able to release you in the morning, Mr uh… Reacher .”
I grinned widely. “Thank you, darlin’. That’s the kinda news a man needs.”
She frowned at both of us.
“Of course, it’s the early hours of the morning, and instead of resting, you’re sitting talking about… stuff… and drinking… drinking coffee?” She heaved a huge sigh.
“You were advised to avoid caffeine.”
Shit . I tried another grin. “It’s his. He needs a lot of it, see, so I’m just helping him out by holding his spare. I might have sniffed it though. Does that count?”
She eased the paper cup out of my hands.
“Lie to yourself when you’re out of here, Reacher. We’re trying to make you better. You’ll be leaving with a long list of advisories, to try and avoid this, or worse, happening in the future, so rather than being a stubborn man, maybe you should actually try following them.” She left before I could complain about her stealing my coffee.
“I blame you.” I jabbed a finger in Ryder’s direction, and he sighed, slumping further in his seat.