2. Elijah
Present Day
The faster my feet moved the more distance I was able to put between myself and the thoughts in my head. My body called out for me to slow down but I couldn’t allow it to. I couldn’t allow the thoughts to consume me. Not now.
It was still early and I forced myself to focus on the sunrise as I continued to place one foot in front of the other. Eventually I allowed myself to give in to a slower pace as the trail started to become uphill. I ran these routes almost every day, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to start making it harder.
If it became too easy I would get complacent. Complacency was a one-way ticket to failure, which was not an option for me. I couldn’t allow weakness to consume me.
I wouldn’t allow it.
A piercing scream broke my trance. I couldn’t make out the words, but the fear in the scream sent shivers down my spine. Where was it coming from?
I spun myself round, looking for the source of the scream. I couldn’t see anyone, but I could still hear it. It sounded like it was coming from my left so I turned off the path and ran towards the noise. Fear threatened to overwhelm me but I pushed it down, quickening my pace towards the source of the scream.
It was getting louder; I had to be getting closer.
I ran as fast as I physically could towards it. I needed to get there. I needed to help her. I cursed myself for not bringing my gun out with me on runs.
As the scream threatened to deafen me, I stopped briefly to look around. I still couldn’t place it. “Where are you?” I shouted out, but there was no reply.
All of a sudden, the screaming stopped and a silence scarier than the scream filled the air. It was so quiet I could hear my own heart beating violently against my chest.
“I’m here, tell me where you are. I can help!” I yelled out again. No response.
“Elijah?” A questioning voice called from behind.
I turned quickly to see Jake, our neighbour making his way over to me. “Are you okay? I heard you shouting.” He raised a concerned brow at me as he stopped. I took a second to catch my breath before responding.
“I heard someone screaming, I’m trying to find out where they are.” My head was still searching around. It was quiet now, but I listened for any sound of movement. Anything that would give me an indication as to where she was.
“Really? I didn’t hear anything; I just ran down the trail alongside here,” he said, pointing. “The only noise I’ve heard was you.”
I allowed my eyes to stop searching and meet his. His words felt heavy as I digested them. Those screams were so loud, he was running right where they were coming from. How did he not hear them?
The truth dawned on me then. The screams were not real.
I had allowed it to take control. Again. My mind was playing tricks on me. Again.
The screams were nothing but an old memory.
“I must have been hearing things, I didn’t get much sleep last night,” I joked, trying to play off my embarrassment. I knew better than to let myself fall into this trap. I needed to pull myself together. “Sorry for interrupting your run.”
“Don’t worry, the wind can play tricks up here.” A kind smile formed on Jake’s lips.
If he thought I was crazy, he wasn’t showing it on his face. “Are you heading this way? Want to finish up together?”
Truthfully, I couldn’t face any more conversation after that, so I lied. “Actually, I’m going to head down there, but I’m sure I’ll see you later.” He gave me a quick nod before heading off on his own run again.
My lie had just extended my morning run by a couple more miles. I would be paying for that later.
When I eventually returned home, I wasted no time in getting in the shower post run. I slowly turned the temperature hotter and hotter until it was scalding my skin. It was a bad habit of mine, but I wanted the shower to burn. I wanted that reminder that I was still here, that I could still feel something.
If it were up to me I would have stayed there for hours, but after getting side tracked on my run I didn’t have as much time as usual before work. I put on my uniform and headed out the door. I wasn’t in the mood to make myself anything, so another café breakfast it was. It looked like my brother hadn’t bothered to make himself anything on the way out, either. It felt like he was up and out earlier each day at the moment. I pulled out my phone and shot him a text.
E: Dinner at Blake’s later?
I felt protective over both my siblings being the oldest, like I had a responsibility to keep an eye on them and make sure they were taking care of themselves. My brother was putting his all into his business and I was proud of him, but I couldn’t help but worry about him. He was going to burn himself out soon if he didn’t take a minute to slow down. If nothing else, I could make sure he got one decent meal in him today.
The coffee shop I frequented was called Caffeine Central, a fitting name since caffeine seemed to be the centre of the universe for a lot of the patrons.
It was located directly opposite the police station where I worked and was extremely popular amongst the officers. Honestly, it was really the only reason I ate properly most days.
“Coffee with the breakfast special?” Jane asked almost as soon as I walked through the door. She was the owner and always talked about slowing down. But every time I saw her, she seemed to be working harder and faster.
“You know me well. Thank you, J.” I probably should be embarrassed to be known that well, but it was comforting. Jane was one of those people who not only asked how you were, but she was genuinely interested in the answer. She was also one of the only people I could stand small talk with. “You have any luck with your vacancy?” I asked. She shook her head.
“No, but I could do with filling the position soon. I know I have Maggie, and she’s great, but I’m hoping one of these days I can work a few less hours myself. I shouldn’t complain; you officers are always keeping me busy. I appreciate that, I’m just not getting any younger,” she laughed, busying herself with the coffee machine.
“Who would have thought opening a coffee shop opposite a police station would be a hit?” I teased. “I’ll keep an ear to the ground. If I hear anyone looking, I’ll send them your way.”
“Thank you.” She smiled softly. “You’ve always been one of my favourites Officer Weatherston.” She winked at me as she handed me my coffee and breakfast sandwich. “I’m sure the perfect person will waltz into town and land in my lap soon enough.”
I nodded to her and made my way over to one of the tables near the back of the café.
It was early, but it wouldn’t be long until this place was swarmed with locals.
I still had some time before my shift started. As much as I regretted leaving the blistering shower as quickly as I did, it was nice to have a moment of peace now. I sat down and placed my bits on the table. I couldn’t help but watch the front of the station out the window. People watching was almost second nature to me now. I was always wondering what people were doing and where they were going. I couldn’t help sometimes wondering if they were up to anything bad.
Was that man walking fast because he was late or was he running away from something he’d done? I was consumed by my obsession with social observation.
I guess in a way it was my job to look for malicious intentions and uphold the law, but there was an intensity in the way I watched the world. I felt like I couldn’t ever switch off, not for a single moment. What if I wasn’t paying attention and someone got hurt? If I wasn’t watching, then who was? I needed to keep my wits about me. It wasn’t a want–it was a necessity.
I felt the world on my shoulders.
If I made one wrong move, then the whole thing would fall apart. I couldn’t help but catastrophize.
My chest tightened with each movement outside as a sense of guilt washed over me. Guilt that I wasn’t out there stopping these bad things from happening.
A buzz from my phone distracted me briefly from the nerves bubbling away in my stomach. Or it may have been hunger as I had yet to touch my sandwich.
L: Only if you’re paying
Asshole.
My brother’s business was successful enough that he could definitely afford his own dinner, but as my younger brother he had this need to irritate me as much as possible. He would likely spend the entire dinner ripping me a new one about something or other before chucking me the check at the end. I sighed and sent him a thumbs up emoji in return. I couldn’t complain too much–it was my idea. It was the only way to make sure he finished at a decent time today. He’d work late into the night if I let him. Being a workaholic seemed to run in the family.
Putting my phone back in my pocket, I tucked into my sandwich, taking my attention away from the window. I would spend all shift watching people I could take a minute away from it–at least that’s what I told myself. As soon as I finished, I turned my attention to my coffee. I wasn’t completely lying to Jake earlier when I said I hadn’t slept very well last night. I never slept well; I could never shut my brain long enough to allow for much sleep.
The café door opened with a clang as Officers Lawrence and Taylor entered. Their laughter filled the previously peaceful and quiet café. They had this obnoxious aura around them as they approached Jane. That’s my cue to leave. I quickly finished the dregs of my coffee.
“Elijah!”
The booming voice of Daniel Taylor pierced through my peace.
“You got time for another coffee?” His eyes darted between myself and Jane. I did indeed have time for another coffee; however, I’d rather stick pins in my eyes then spend a minute longer than I needed to in their company.
“Sorry, in a rush. Another time, maybe.” I didn’t leave them enough time to respond as I made my way out the door. I crossed the street to the station.
I guess I will be clocking in a little early today.