Chapter Eleven
Nico had come out, and they’d both come in their pants.
His underwear was a mess. Jake shifted uncomfortably, grateful his jeans were dark. Since they had another afternoon game the next day, they’d been able to duck out fairly early, and Marco offered to drive them back to their hotel on his way home.
Nico was in the backseat, staring wordlessly out the window. Jake forced himself to chat with Marco, who fortunately never seemed to run out of things to say.
The urge to turn around and reach for Nico’s knee and ask him what he was thinking surged through Jake in waves as Marco expertly steered his huge SUV through suburban Chicago streets, claiming he knew all the best shortcuts.
“And I thought, serves her right!” Marco laughed expectantly.
“Seriously!” Jake agreed, having zero clue who Marco was talking about.
As Marco launched into another story, Jake stole a glance into the backseat. Nico sat behind the driver’s seat and still stared into the darkness, passing headlights spotlighting his face for a moment. Was he relieved? Scared? Regretful? All of the above? None of the above?
“Don’t you think?” Marco asked.
“Hmm?” Jake quickly turned his head. “Sorry, I’m thinking about tomorrow’s game.”
“Oh yeah? Anything in particular?” Marco asked so innocently.
“Hold on, let me write down the pitch selection I’m planning for the top of the order.”
“No one has to know, Fitz. I mean, Chicago was once your team.” Punching Jake’s shoulder lightly, Marco turned into the curved driveway of the hotel.
“Well, see you tomorrow on the field. May the best team win.” He peered in the rearview mirror.
“Good thing we won’t have to face your ace on the mound again.
Always knew my little brother would be a hell of a pitcher someday.
Looks like that day is now. You crushed it yesterday, Nic. ”
Nico looked at his brother, finally smiling briefly. “Thanks.”
“Sure. Next time I’m taking you out of the park if it’s the last thing I do. Now get out, you bums.”
In the elevator up to the eighteenth floor, they didn’t say a word, Jake smiling and nodding to a young couple who clearly recognized them.
What’s going to happen now? What do I want to happen? What does he want to happen?
They stepped off on their hushed floor, all sedate cream and brown. “I’m…” Nico pointed to his right. “This way.”
Jake checked his key card, totally blanking on the number. “I’m that way.”
As they stood there by the elevator bank, it felt ridiculously symbolic. Too many words crowded on Jake’s tongue, and as he tried to pick a few, Nico said, “See you tomorrow,” turning on his heel and disappearing through a door halfway down the hall.
Okay. So apparently Nico didn’t want anything else to happen. That was… That was for the best, clearly. Jake hurried to his room, stripping off his clothes and turning on the shower. He scrubbed dried cum out of his pubes and told himself it was fine. It was good. Everything was good.
Naked and rubbing a towel over his damp hair, he stalked around his room, the brown carpet thick under his feet. He needed to ice his knees and get out his foam roller to work out the tightness in his quads and hamstrings, but his mind played the encounter in Nico’s room on a loop.
Jake had been with his fair share of men, and he couldn’t remember ever feeling that kind of buzz, that kind of connection.
He didn’t just want to fuck Nico. He wanted to talk to him.
He wanted to say everything. Hear everything.
He wanted all the things, and he didn’t really know what they were, exactly.
But he wanted.
Nico had been so vulnerable, an honesty in his kisses that had Jake’s lips still tingling. That he’d apparently wanted Jake for years was an undeniable turn-on. Although Nico didn’t seem to want Jake now, given the way he’d taken off.
Unless he was embarrassed. Ashamed, even.
The thought of Nico believing he was bad had Jake clenching his fists, a swell of sticky anger and frustration heating his neck and cheeks.
What if Nico was hating himself now? What if he’d been waiting for Jake to make the first move? To tell him it was okay?
Nico had come out. Had Jake inadvertently rejected him?
Still pacing, he looked at the door as if Nico would suddenly materialize there. If Jake didn’t go to him now, would Nico burrow back into his shell? Jake couldn’t let that happen. It didn’t matter what he wanted—he had to put Nico first and make sure he was okay. Make sure he didn’t feel alone.
Shaking his head, he scoffed. “Oh yeah, you’re a real hero. Because there’s nothing in it for you to go fuck him now. It would be a complete sacrifice.”
He hummed with the urge to get Nico naked and show him how good it could be between two men.
Ached to bury himself in that tight ass and experience Nico’s complete surrender.
Taste his lips again, feel those thick eyelashes fluttering, hear the low moans in the back of his throat.
See the dimples in his cheeks, the ever-present tension lifted.
Chugging a bottle of water, Jake cleared his parched throat.
The first person he’d ever told he was gay had been Tony Tucker from Moose Jaw at some tournament in Winnipeg a million years ago.
Jake had been seventeen, and he and Tony had ended up drinking too much beer and going for a midnight skinny dip.
They’d jerked each other off and kissed with too much thrusting tongue, and it had been amazing.
But first was the terror. Although Jake had been mostly sure Tony was at least curious about boys, his heart had nearly beat right out of his chest and plopped into the water like a dying fish in the bottom of a boat.
He could still remember the sweet swell of relief that Tony hadn’t laughed or been disgusted or punched him—and that he’d kissed back.
Naked in the middle of his room, Jake stopped pacing. No matter what happened, he had to make sure Nico didn’t feel abandoned.
A scant minute later he knocked quietly on Nico’s door, hair damp and feet bare, commando under cargo shorts, a tank top on backwards, the tag scratching his chest. Nico appeared in a fluffy white bathrobe, his curls wet. He looked at Jake inscrutably, then stood back.
When the door was shut, Jake said, “I wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
Nico nodded.
“That’s a lie, actually. I mean, I do want to make sure you’re okay, but I want more than that.” Everything.
Adam’s apple bobbing, Nico asked, “What?”
“To fuck you. And I’m not sure if I should, or if that’s what you want right now.
What you need. And if you do want it, I’m not sure how to do it.
” He tugged at the neck of his tank top.
“Should it be rough? Do you want me to spank you tonight? Do you want to see my face the first time? Because I want to see yours. But I could pound you too, get you on your hands and knees to take my cock. Am I going to hurt you? Do you want me to? Or do you want to go slow?”
Nico opened and closed his mouth. Finally, he whispered, “Yes.”
“Which part?”
“All of it.”
Breath catching, Jake managed to nod. “Get on the bed. Naked. However you want.”
As Nico dropped the robe and crossed the room, Jake yanked off his clothes, too keyed up to wait, to stay dressed and teasing. Especially when Nico was presenting himself on his back, his legs spread, chest rising and falling rapidly, cock thickening and curving toward his belly.
It was an earth-toned hotel room like hundreds Jake had been in before, and the side table lamp cast a golden glow over Nico’s bare skin. He looked so perfect, like someone had put a soft-light filter on the whole room.
“Good boy,” Jake murmured before ducking into the bathroom to root through Nico’s toilet bag. He came out with condoms and a bottle of pure aloe vera sunburn gel, tossing them on the other side of the king-sized mattress. Nico watched his movements avidly, his red lips parted.
“You’ve never had a man touch you like this before?” Jake sat on his heels between Nico’s legs, nudging them wider and ignoring the needles of pain in his knees. He traced his fingertips up and down Nico’s trembling inner thighs.
A shake of Nico’s head.
“I want you to answer me. I want you to talk. You said a lot earlier. Didn’t that feel good?”
Nico started to nod, then said, “Yes.”
He pushed up Nico’s knees, displaying his ass. “Do you think it’ll feel good if I kiss your hole? If I lick it?”
Breath ragged, Nico whined, “Yes.”
“Any of your girls ever do that for you?”
“No.” A drop of water fell from Nico’s hair, sliding down his nose. His arms were spread, hands in fists.
After scooting back, Jake huffed hot air over the puckered skin of Nico’s hole. He feathered little kisses around it, avoiding direct contact. Rubbing his cheek against the tender skin of Nico’s inner thigh, he asked, “Do you like how rough my stubble is?”
A whimper. “Yes.”
“What else do you like?” Jake continued his torment, teasing Nico’s thighs and the sensitive skin behind his balls, barely brushing them with his face and lips.
For a moment, Nico sounded like he was choking. Then he gritted out, “Your hands. How big they are.”
Jake flattened his palms on the back of Nico’s thighs, pushing his legs even higher. “You like knowing these hands are in charge?”
“Yes.”
“Will you really do anything?” Jake wouldn’t test the limits of Nico’s boundaries tonight, but he still held his breath waiting for the answer.
“Yes. I trust you.”
Rubbing Nico’s hairy thighs gently, Jake caught his breath, his heart in his throat. Then he leaned down and made good on his promise, kissing Nico’s hole with wet presses before licking over it again and again, dipping inside.
Nico cried out, moaning softly. “Please fuck me. Please, Jake.”