Chapter Eleven #3
She set her two fingers to her jaw, a habit he noticed she had when she contemplated a weighty thought. Pleased that she gave his question so much importance, he silently waited, finishing the rest of his meal.
Finally, Sophie looked at him. “Since each woman is unique, to sum up everyone here, I would have to say that they all think differently from most young ladies who have come out.”
He opened his mouth to ask how, but she held up her hand.
“My classmates are interested in learning far more than painting and embroidery, not because they don’t wish to be happy wives, but because instinctually they know that would not be enough for them.
They would be forever restless if they could not find that one subject that sparks their intellect and brings an inner joy no matter their circumstances. ”
“An inner joy? Is that what these students search for?”
“Not consciously. At least, I don’t believe so.
For example, Lady Georgina is desperate to wed.
She wishes to be a wife more than almost anything.
But there is one thing that brings her happiness even though she is yet unwed.
She loves to study birds. On the other hand, Lady Rose is fascinated by the human body and the latest advances in medicine.
She seems ambivalent about marrying, but if you break your arm, she’ll be the first to your side to set it.
She’s so joyful in those instances that she practically glows.
I believe that this inner joy is what will make every one of my classmates a happy wife if they marry for love. ”
Her observations and contention were so profound that he found himself attempting to find an error in her reasoning, but if what she stated was true about her classmates, he could understand how marrying such a woman would be most fulfilling for her husband as well.
“And what of you? I must assume that literature is what makes you joyful, for I have seen it in your face when you discuss it. Does that mean that you can only love a man who enjoys the same interest?”
She laughed, a soft but full laugh. “Not at all. The subject of joy is personal to each of us. And truly, how boring to have a spouse who likes the same subject. I think it would be far more stimulating to have different interests, as then there is more to learn about each other.”
It was no surprise that she’d given much thought as to what type of man she would marry, whereas he had not thought at all about his future wife.
He had far too many goals to accomplish before contemplating what he wished for in such a woman, but talking to her…
“I believe that I would like a wife from this school.”
Her gaze left his, moving to where he held his wine glass. “That would be a wise decision, I’m sure. I sincerely hope that two years from now, you will have many ladies to choose from.”
Her sudden shyness bothered him because he instinctually knew he was the cause.
He let go of the stem of his wine glass and laid his hand upon hers, which rested next to her empty bowl.
She wore no gloves and the feel of her soft skin almost stopped his breath, but not completely.
“I would like a lady very much like you, I think.”
Her gaze snapped to his and her lips parted.
As he lost himself in the depths of her green eyes, he knew he lied. He didn’t want someone like her as a wife. He wanted her. Even as that truth settled in his gut, a hundred problems arose in his mind with such a possibility.
As Sophie jerked her gaze away to scan the kitchen, he did as well.
Surprised, yet pleased, that Mrs. Boyd was no longer there, he boldly clasped Sophie’s hand beneath his.
He shouldn’t, but he couldn’t stop himself.
There was a connection with her that was right, much like his instincts had told him to make the bet with Harewood. He just knew.
“Tam, I don’t think…”
His heart skipped a beat at her name for him. “Then don’t think.” He lifted his other hand to cup her face. “Just feel.”
Her tongue came out and she licked her lips. Then she lifted her free hand and cupped his face. Her soft touch sent a glow of warmth throughout his body like stepping into the sunshine after walking through a dark, cold wood.
Suddenly, she pulled both her hands away and rose. “I should return to my room.” She took a step back.
“No.” He stood, but at her wide eyes, he softened his tone. “Please.”
What began as fear in her gaze changed to a far more knowing look.
“I know what you would like, but I can’t allow it.
” She shook her head before taking another step away.
Then, as if she were at a safe distance, she ran her gaze over him from the top of his head down to his booted feet and back to his face. “No matter how much I would like to.”
He sucked in his breath at the desire in her gaze before she spun and ran from the room.
His breath came out in a whoosh as he remembered to breathe.
It wasn’t just shock at her look, but at the knowing in her eyes.
The pure need to have her in his arms hit him hard.
“Damn.” He rolled his shoulders, feeling as if he’d stood as a statue for hours instead of just moments. What the deuce was happening?
Picking up his wine glass, he threw back the rest of the dark liquid then set it on the table. He may not understand why he was attracted to Lady Sophie, but one thing he did know—he would have to stay far away from her…for both their sakes.