Chapter Sixteen
Three days later
Christopher read the letter from Mr. Morton and a rock formed in his gut.
Just as he thought he was moving forward, fate had conspired against him.
A hole in the roof of the east wing needed repair, as rain had already damaged three of the upstairs rooms, the tenants were complaining of a lack of seed for the spring plantings, and the steward had discovered additional thefts, including some furniture and paintings.
He dropped the letter on the desk in the faculty study.
If only he could be there. On one hand, he wished to leave immediately.
On the other hand, he didn’t want to leave because this was where Sophie was, even if he hadn’t been able to talk to her since the night in the library.
He’d only seen her skating, which had been riveting, but he couldn’t go down to the pond without an excuse.
He’d also seen her in the audience at the play the students and instructors had performed, but afterward the students left directly for dinner.
He felt torn because he still didn’t have a solution for what to do about her, as he didn’t know how she felt.
Did she only wish to learn what passion was, or did she specifically want it with him?
Did she look forward to meeting the contemplative Lord Wilford, who was the opposite of himself in standing and personality?
The man had an entailed estate and, since returning to England last summer, had only been seen at lectures and one concert.
Christopher shoved Morton’s letter into the drawer with the old ledgers.
He wouldn’t get any answers standing in the study.
He left the room and headed up the grand stairs.
He had no conversations scheduled with students and still had half the day to fill.
He might as well go for a ride. He just wasn’t sure where he should go, to Ravenridge to talk the duke into releasing him from his offer, or into Bedford village to walk off some of his frustration.
At the top of the stairs, he halted as Lady Rose stood there watching him. “Do you need something from me?”
She gave him a sly grin. “Not at all. I was just contemplating the best way to initiate you into the faculty.”
He shook his head. “I’ve been here over a week and will be leaving soon, so any plans you have for a Falstaffian prank should probably wait for the next new instructor.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t want you to feel slighted when I’ve helped every other instructor to feel a part of the faculty. It’s just, as you are a friend of the family, I need to be sure my welcome is just right.”
He waved off her words. “Then have at it. Just be sure, as a friend of the family, that you’re prepared for retaliation.”
“You wouldn’t.”
He grinned. “Indeed, I would. I’m sure that your brother would be most helpful. I understand he once put a frog in your bed?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “And your brother is under this very roof. Thank you for suggesting I consult with him.”
He doubted that even Rose would let Andrew know she planned some kind of prank. “Consult away. At least I know a frog in my bed will be impossible with the pond frozen over.”
“I wouldn’t use such a tired trick anyway. I do like to be creative. In the meantime, I need to get down to the library for a book I need to help Arabella. You may continue about your day.”
He laughed at her ladylike haughtiness, something she could turn to in an instant. “I wish you good fortune in your endeavors.”
She gave him a regal nod as he passed by her.
He continued around the grand stair balcony and down the corridor to his room. After walking in, he closed it and stepped toward the armoire.
“Tam?”
He spun around. “Sophie!”
“Shh.” She glanced toward the door.
He strode to her and pulled her to him, then captured her lips with his own and kissed her, uncaring that he shouldn’t. It just felt right to have her in his arms again.
She melted into him, tangling her tongue with his own until his body started to react and he found the strength to break the kiss and let her go.
He forced himself to take two steps back and kept his voice low. “What are you doing here?”
“I had to talk to you.”
His heart jumped with joy, but his mind cautioned him. “This is probably not the best place.”
“It is the only place.”
She had a point, but he didn’t wish her reputation to be ruined. “What did you wish to talk about?”
She clasped her hands, not answering immediately.
“Is it about the other night?”
“It is related.”
When she didn’t continue, he took two more steps back because he wasn’t nearly as patient as she was. “Please tell me.”
“Yes. I should. I feel as if we are friends.”
They’d gone far beyond friends, but he didn’t think interrupting would help. Instead, he held his hand out for her to continue.
“Ever since that night in the library, I feel like I want to be with you. I’ve tried to read three of the four books I’ve started and I can’t concentrate.”
His heart leapt at her confession. “I’m also having a difficult time concentrating.”
“You are? Do you not feel like eating?”
He smiled. “I always feel like eating.”
The hope in her eyes disappeared, and she looked away. “Then I don’t know what it is. I feel listless, yet I don’t want to do anything.”
“Now I feel that as well.”
Her head snapped up and her gaze met his once again. “Then you know what it is?”
Damn, he knew what he hoped it was, but what if it wasn’t? “I have a theory, but I am far from an expert.”
“Then we could research it in the library. Please. Tell me your theory.”
He gestured toward the wingback chair before his fireplace. As she sat, he moved to lean against the mantel. “First, tell me how you feel about me.”
“I think you are a good man with aspirations and a plan that will succeed. I believe you to be full of humor and a bit boisterous, but just enough to make you popular among men, and your appearance makes you popular among women. You are also kind, thoughtful, and well read.”
To hear a litany of his worthiness was not what he expected, and while reassuring, it wasn’t what he wanted. He was too curious not to ask, “And what about my faults?”
She set two fingers to her jaw and thought. Finally, she gave a nod. “You hide your accomplishments for fear of what others will think and don’t let others truly know you.”
Her observation was so accurate that he was stunned into silence.
“Does that help your theory?” She lowered her hand to clasp her other one once again.
His theory? It actually didn’t. “What I wish to know is how you feel about me. You said we are friends. I concur. But you have other friends here at Silver Meadows, like your classmates and Mrs. Boyd. Would you say I’m the same kind of friend?”
“No. After the other night, you would be considered my lover.”
His entire body reacted to her statement, such that he had to walk toward the bed. Upon his reaching it, it became clear that that hadn’t been the wisest location, as it fueled his imagination.
She continued. “But, of course, you can’t be that because I am yet unmarried, and if it were known, I would remain so.
My book said that such carnal relations might lead to false feelings for the other person if one is not married.
Is that your theory? That I have false feelings because of the other night, and if that’s true, do you know how I can be rid of them? I’m not a false person. I value truth.”
And just like that, his body cooled, leaving his hands in a cold sweat. He turned toward her. “My theory is that your feelings may not be false.”
Her eyes widened. “That means if my feelings are true, then I must be in love with you.”
Her words had his chest lightening. “You don’t appear pleased.”
She rose, holding on to the chair. “I can’t be. We are not betrothed and you are not to marry for years. If this is true, it’s terrible.”
He was a fool, but he couldn’t remain where he was. He strode to her and took her hands in his. “Is it? If I tell you that I love you, would it be so terrible?”
Her green gaze searched his own. “Truly?”
“Yes. I love you. I don’t know how or why, but I know it started when I kissed a pretty shepherdess on my way to the ballroom.”
Her eyes grew teary. “I love you as well.”
Joy burst through him unlike any he’d felt before. He wanted to shout with euphoria, but her gaze tempered him. “What is it? You look as if you wish to cry.”
“I do. You will not wed—no, cannot—until your estate is stable and you have the finances to support a wife. Also, my mother wishes me to wed another. So how can loving each other be good?”
He let go of her hands and clasped her face. “It’s good that we feel this toward each other. Everything else we can solve.” He gave her a light kiss to reassure her.
When he let her go, she moved away, consciously or unconsciously, toward the door. “I believe I could convince my mother that I wish to marry you, but my father will insist that you are financially able to support me. You aren’t.”
And there was the crux of his dilemma. “No, not now.”
She didn’t say anything, but he knew what she was thinking.
Lord Wilford could support her immediately, while Christopher’s mode of income was investments and bets, not what a father would accept.
And what if Sophie met Wilford and found him to be agreeable?
“You are here at the school for seven more weeks. I will see what I can do in that time.” He stepped up to her and cupped her cheek.
“Do not give up on something as special as love.”
Her lips finally lifted in a soft smile. “I won’t. I promise.”
He sealed her promise with another gentle kiss then reached for the door.
“Wait.” She lifted a book from the table next to his chair, then nodded.
He opened the door to find Lord Hopton striding down the corridor to his room. Quietly, Christopher closed the door and shook his head. He waited until he heard the distinct sound of a door closing then looked into the corridor again. No one was about. “You can go now.”
She opened the book, and was about to start out when he stopped her.
Taking the book from her hands, he turned it right side up then checked the corridor again.
With a nod, she started out, to all appearances reading and walking.
He closed the door and leaned his back against it before cracking the knuckles of his right hand. What should have been a euphoric moment was now filled with doubt, but he was resourceful and he would find a way to achieve his dream, which now included a loving wife.
The question was, how?
*
Three days later
Sophie donned her clothes quickly and sat at her dressing table, anxious to break her fast and start the day.
Mrs. Boyd had given her a note from Tam saying he’d arranged to talk to her during her usual session with Mrs. Kingman.
He’d written that he’d made progress on his financial concerns.
Fortunately, Mrs. Boyd was trustworthy and enjoyed the secrecy, finding the situation very romantic.
Her maid lifted the brush and began attempting to pull Sophie’s hair into a neat bun, which they both knew would not work. “I finished the book you lent me, my lady. I will bring it back this evening when you dress for dinner. I truly enjoyed it.”
“I’m so pleased. Would you like to borrow another from the same author? She has a few others published.”
“I would, very much.”
The maid tried to tuck in the loose strands, but Sophie was anxious to go to the dining room. “Let them be, Miss Clark. It’s not as if I have a ball to attend.”
“Yes, my lady.” The maid set down the brush. “You look quite fetching with those wisps of hair about your face, if you don’t mind my opinion.”
Sophie rose and smiled at her maid in the mirror. “Not at all. I wish it were the fashion, as it would be so much easier to dress on a daily basis.”
“You could make it a fashion?”
She laughed softly. “That’s doubtful. You have a pleasant day, Miss Clark.”
“Are you not waiting for Lady Georgina?”
Sophie set her hand to the doorknob. “No. I think Mrs. Boyd was making boiled eggs today. I do so enjoy those.”
Miss Clark nodded. “I like them, too.”
After opening the door, Sophie slipped out and quickly descended the grand stairs, then strode through the entry and parlor to reach the empty dining room. Pleased that no one had yet come down, she moved to the window to view the pond.
Tam was just donning his skates, as he did most every morning. She waited, almost breathless, for him to take his first strides onto the ice. She loved watching him move. His movements were always so strong yet smooth. Finally, he took two steps on his skates to reach the pond and pushed off.
She sighed. She couldn’t help it. There was so much about him that she loved.
Knowing he felt the same about her had left her in a constant state of euphoria and dread.
She’d never imagined she would feel this way.
While her classmates did, she’d honestly doubted a man to her liking would ever notice her.
Tam was certainly not the type of man she’d hoped for, yet she found him perfect for her, even if he wasn’t perfect.
She was not so na?ve to believe he was a saint, not with the way he kissed. And with the way he made her feel, he—
“Oh, good. He’s just started.”
At the sound of Rose’s voice, Sophie turned. “Yes. He’s headed for the east side of the pond now. Why?”
Rose gave her a sly smile. “No reason.”
Dread filled Sophie’s belly. “Rose Ambrose, what did you do?”
“Nothing terrible. I just woke up before the birds and left him a message with that case of scotch he had sitting in the faculty study.”
“Scotch?” Dread formed in the pit of Sophie’s stomach. “What did you do with it?”
“I wrote the word ‘ENJOY’ with it on the grass and then emptied the contents of all the bottles on the ice. If he hits it too fast, he’ll be soaked. It’s perfect.”
“Rose, alcohol melts ice. He’ll fall through! How could you?” Sophie spun and ran to the entryway, grabbing her cloak.
“It’s just in the shallows. It’s not like he’ll drown or anything. Though his feet will certainly get wet. Maybe even his knees.”
She didn’t need to hear any more. She ran down the corridor to the servants’ door, footsteps behind her letting her know Rose had followed. Sophie threw open the door and sprang outside. Tam was skating toward the east end, where Rose had done her damage.
Sophie ran, her anger at Rose combined with her worry over Tam, giving her more speed, but even as she approached the pond, she could see she wouldn’t be in time unless she ran across it to cut him off.
“Tam!” She waved at him. “Tam!”
He slowed his strides as he looked at her.
Grateful now that he’d turned toward her, she started off across the ice, but with no blades on her shoes, she had a hard time staying balanced.
Tam started toward her, a frown on his face.
She smiled to let him know nothing was wrong, then promptly lost her balance and fell. The ice beneath her gave way and suddenly she was in cold, wet darkness.