The Spring After
I told Landry that he was going to have to carry on this tradition without me. If I never see another deck of cards in my life, it’ll be too soon.”
Jade was sitting, bent over the edge of her bed, tying the laces of her sneakers. Franny was in the en suite, cleaning a new tattoo she’d gotten that afternoon.
“It won’t be so bad,” Franny said, her voice muffled. “It’ll be all the same guys as before.”
“That definitely doesn’t make it any better,” Jade grumbled.
She threw herself back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling with a pout on her face. She was being ornery, she knew it. But she’d managed to get out of going to those damn poker games ever since the school year had begun. They hadn’t had anything close to a perfect season. The Greenbelt Gators had taken their fair number of losses and setbacks. They hadn’t ended the season with a championship trophy the way everyone had hoped they would. But they’d made it far in the playoffs. Further than they had in the past four years. The disappointment among her players had been palpable, but so had the hope for next year.
Their loss this season had been a major upset for the kids, especially the seniors who’d left for greener pastures with no championship titles holding them up. Greenbelt had closed out the season with a spot in the championships. They’d lost in the semifinals to Oakbridge High but finished with twenty-eight wins and six losses for the year. The only comfort was that West Beaufort hadn’t even managed to make it past the first round of the playoffs.
They had put a lot of work into keeping the players energized. Tryouts were just around the corner, and Jade had a lot of hope, not only for all the new blood coming in but for their upcoming season in general. They were taking it all the way this year. There was no other option; she wouldn’t allow it. Jade felt that familiar fire in her belly swell every time she thought about the work that needed to be done to get them there. Their most recent upset was like gasoline on the flames, and the way it engulfed her completely was all the motivation she needed.
In the meantime, Landry hadn’t fought her on her absences at the poker games. Jade figured he had too much on his plate to worry about whether she was up for a weekly game of Texas Hold’em, but now all of a sudden, he was insisting on it? It was weird. And annoying.
“Why couldn’t he just let us take him to Red Lobster or something, like a normal person?”
“I think Red Lobster is more of a graduation dinner place. Shellfish isn’t the meal for retirement.”
That made Jade laugh. She hoisted herself up and made her way into the bathroom, wrapping her arms around Franny’s waist from behind as the other woman rubbed some kind of thick gel on the tiny Betty Boop tattooed on her hip.
“What exactly is a retirement meal?”
Jade pressed her face into the back of Franny’s neck. She smelled clean, fresh from the shower. The woodsy cologne she sometimes wore was even more delicious on her skin, and Jade made sure to take the time to breathe in deeply.
Franny caught her eyes in the big mirror in front of them. That smirk was back on her face. The one Jade had spent two years cursing and praying to see in equal measure. For so long, Jade had purposefully interpreted that look as being malicious or nasty. She could see it clearly now, though. The twinkle in Franny’s eye. The way her cheeks flushed the slightest bit red. Her pretty pink lips curved ever so slightly. She didn’t look like she was being spiteful. She looked coy. Jade checked the smartwatch on her wrist, cursing when she realized that they needed to be out of the house in less than five minutes. If her ideas around timeliness were even a little laxer, she’d be sliding her fingers into the unbuttoned pants Franny wore and transforming the look on her face from coy to blissful.
“Apparently, chips and salsa are a pretty decent retirement meal,” Franny joked.
Jade groaned again, burying her face into Franny’s shoulder. “Yeah, and cigars.”
“Come on, angel.” Franny patted Jade’s arm. “Let’s go before you end up miserable in the squeaky chair.”
“Are you sure we can’t call it off? I feel like I might be getting sick all of a sudden. It could be the flu. I heard that’s going around.”
“Mmm,” Franny hummed, turning to press her lips to Jade’s forehead. “The sooner we go, the sooner we can come back and watch some gay shit on TV.”
“Fine. But only because I love gay shit on TV so much.”
Sometimes it seemed that when she was out in public with Franny, her brain was almost completely turned off. She held her girlfriend’s hand and trailed behind her with nary a care in the world, following along like the inside of her head was filled with multicolored cotton candy or something. This must have been why she didn’t notice all the cars parked outside Landry’s house. And why, when Landry opened the door surrounded by a large swath of her closest friends yelling, “Surprise!” at her, the only thing she could think to say was, “It’s not even my birthday!”
That garnered an inordinate amount of laughs from the crowd, which in turn made her cheeks heat up. She clasped on tighter to Franny’s hand as they made their way inside. The normal poker-night guys were there, sure. But so were the rest of the Greenbelt football coaches and some coaches from the other sports teams.
“What the hell is going on?” she asked Franny in a low mumble after shaking hands with the tennis coach. “I mean, Principal Coleman is here with his wife.”
Franny looked at her like she was a fool, yanking on her hand and stopping her in her tracks right there in the middle of Landry’s nautical-themed living room. “You cannot be serious, Jade.”
“What?”
The look on Franny’s face went even slacker. “This is your party. It’s for you.”
“No, it isn’t.”
“Oh, no? Well, why did everyone yell surprise when you came in?”
“That was just a prank.”
“You think your parents came here just to see you get pranked?”
“Wha—”
Franny spun her around by her upper arms, sending her toward the kitchen, where her mother and father were standing in the doorway talking to Miri and Aja.
“You didn’t think we were going to let your big moment pass by without a little fanfare, did you?” Landry’s voice sent her spinning around again. She was suddenly dizzy, though not solely because of the sudden movements. “It’s like you don’t know me at all, Coach.”
“Landry…” Her throat was suddenly thick, and it made her words come out all wobbly. Franny grabbed her hand and squeezed.
“I wanted to throw a pep rally at the school. Bring out the players and the mascots and all that. You’re lucky your girl here suggested something more intimate.”
She looked at Franny, who smiled softly at her. Jade’s belly flipped the way it did the first time their eyes met.
“You didn’t need to do this,” she said.
“Yes, we did,” Landry said, his gaze incredibly soft. “I don’t want there to be any doubt that you’re getting this position, because no one else is better fitted for it than you.”
“Coach, I don’t even know what to say right now.”
“You’d better come up with something quick because our speech is in ten minutes.” He was off then without a word, disappearing into a small crowd of some of the more involved team parents.
“‘Speech’?” She looked at Franny again. “What does he mean, ‘speech’?”
Her girlfriend grimaced. “I couldn’t talk him out of it. I’m sorry.”
“I’m not doing a speech, Francesca. You know I hate public speaking.”
“Let’s go talk to your folks, so you can distract yourself and just speak on the fly.”
Jade pouted but allowed herself to be pushed into her mother’s arms. She breathed in the fresh floral scent of her mother’s perfume, fighting back the urge to cry. She sniffed when she pulled back, going to hug her father, then Aja, and Miri last. Clinging on to her best friend like she was adrift with only a life raft.
“I can’t believe y’all kept this from me!”
Her father snorted. “Now what kind of surprise would it be if we’d told you about it?”
“One I could have prepared for,” she grumbled.
Miri pinched her on the arm. “It’s your special day. Be nice.”
“I know, I know. I’m just nervous, I guess. All this really wasn’t necessary.”
“It was, though, baby,” her mother said. “This is monumental. Let it be that. Let us celebrate you.”
Jade sucked in a deep breath, her eyes moving around her immediate vicinity as she took in some of the people she loved most in the world. It was overwhelming to see their faces, proud and joyous, and all for her. Shining eyes and lips curled up, each one of them seemed like they were actively restraining themselves from letting their excitement explode fully out of their bodies. In their defense, she was doing the exact same thing. Every time she sucked in air, her chest caved so much, she felt like her pounding heart would slam right through it. Every cell in her body felt activated. It wasn’t so much fight-or-flight as it was sheer elation on a level she’d never experienced before. Jade had thought she knew how this would feel, but she hadn’t. Not by a long shot. And now that she was in it, she barely knew how to act like a human, let alone convey her happiness.
As if sensing her overloading brain, Franny slid an arm around her waist. She was an anchor both literally and figuratively. Holding Jade up in more ways than one. Jade eyed her loved ones again.
“He’s going to make me give a speech.” Her voice was tiny when she spoke.
“You’ll be fine,” Miri tried to assure her. “Remember that DARE speech you gave junior year? You did great.”
“We literally had to smoke a joint before that speech.”
“Excuse me?” her mother asked.
Jade’s cheeks heated, but she pointedly ignored the older woman, hoping to avoid a lecture that was over a decade too late.
“I mean, we could…” Miri clutched her purse and pointed to the front door.
Jade considered it. Liquid courage had never meant much to her, but a little hazy courage had gotten her through a few of her tougher moments.
She sighed and shook her head. “I can’t be stoned with all these team parents here.”
“And your parents,” her father said mildly.
“Look, just parrot whatever he says,” Franny said. “Keep it short and sweet, say your thank-yous, and you’ll be done in a few seconds, okay?”
Jade nodded. A few seconds. She could do that. She could do almost anything for a few seconds. Take a needle in her gums, choke down liver and onions, even give a speech.
Thankfully, she had very little time to fixate on it further before the sound of Landry’s signature obnoxious whistle was ringing through the crowded space. He beckoned her over to the center with a big grin, and Jade waded through the crowd like she was on her way to the gallows. When she reached him, he slung an arm around her shoulders.
“Hey! Hey!” His voice carried loud and strong over the room without any help from a microphone. Within seconds, it was almost completely silent as the crowd turned their attention toward them.
Sweat started to bead at Jade’s hairline, taking its time as it slowly descended the sides of her face. She absolutely loathed public speaking. It was one thing to speak to a crowd of students or to put her coach face on and command her players—or even their parents. But staring out at a sea of people she knew so intimately made her feel downright queasy.
Jade put an arm around Landry’s waist, not to return his hug but to keep herself upright as sweat began to pool behind her weakening knees.
Landry was determined to keep going. “By now, everybody here knows that this season was my last as a Greenbelt football coach.” The crowd murmured. “Twenty years is a long time to spend anywhere, let alone coaching one team. But I’ve enjoyed every minute of it.”
He stopped suddenly and cleared his throat a few times. Jade looked up at him and saw his eyes blinking rapidly, shining under the big lights above them. As if she were a child watching her mother cry, her own eyes started to well up in response. In all the years she’d known the man, she’d seen him cry all of two times. Once, years ago, after the sudden and tragic death of one of the players on their team. And another, when she’d accidentally walked in on him watching Field of Dreams in his office.
She tightened her arm around his waist, hoping to provide some type of support during his emotional moment. He smiled down at her—eyes watery and so sincere it took her breath away.
“Hell,” he huffed, laughing to himself. “This team has given me more than I have the words to speak about and damn sure more than I deserve. But it’s time for me to move on… It’s time for some new blood to come in and shake shit up.”
There was a sudden whoop that came from the crowd, and Jade recognized it immediately. Cutting her eyes to where her small group was standing, she saw Miri screwing her face up in some type of goofy, contrite look. Next to her, Aja looked mortified. It was an incredibly ridiculous exchange, but something about it immediately made Jade relax a little. In an instant, she was reminded that she wasn’t actually up there alone. Not physically or spiritually. Her people were right there, all around her. Her eyes flitted around the room, full of faces that she may have only been vaguely familiar with but who looked at her with nothing but pride in their eyes. The man with his arm around her most of all.
“I know y’all have spent months speculating on my retirement, trying to guess who was going to fill my spot when it happens. But what are the kids saying now? If you know, you know, right? Anybody who’s paid any attention the past few years can see the choice clear as day,” he said, looking down at her again. “The second Jade Dunn walked into my office and told me she wanted to coach football, I knew she was going to do great things. And once I saw her on that field with those players, I knew she was going to take my job one day. She’s strong and driven, she commands respect, and most of all, she loves those kids. It’s been an honor to mentor her and an even bigger one to pass my torch along.”
By now, Landry was clearing his throat in an effort not to cry in earnest, and Jade was blinking her own tears back rapidly.
“Thank you, Coach,” she said through shaky breaths. “Thank you so much.”
“Give us a speech!” someone yelled in the crowd, prompting everyone else to chant, “Speech, speech, speech!” until she sighed deep and conceded.
“Um, I’m not good at giving speeches,” she said. “Definitely not as good as Landry is, so don’t expect too much from me, please.”
“We believe in you!” This time, it was Franny’s voice that rang out through the crowd.
Jade immediately locked eyes with her girlfriend. Her gaze was lusciously brown and deeper than anything else in the world, and Jade let herself get lost in it until her heartbeat began to slow and her hands stopped shaking. Even when she finally started speaking, she kept her eyes on Franny. Using the other woman as an anchor.
“Honestly, I don’t even know what to say. My heart is so full right now, I just… I can’t possibly express it all. I’d be lying if I said I haven’t been working toward this. Anybody who knows me knows that I’ve been trying to take Landry’s job for years now.” Thankfully, that garnered her more than a few laughs. “But wanting something can only do so much when there are systems at play not built with you in mind. Or maybe even ones that are built to keep you out. I’m the first woman to ever hold a coaching position on this team, and I’ll be the first Black woman to hold the title of head football coach in this county. That means something to me. It means everything, really.
“I used to think that it was enough for me to get what I wanted, but I’ve realized recently that it isn’t enough. Not nearly. It means the world to me to be given this opportunity. And I’m going to seize it by leading our team to many more wins. But I’m also going to foster an environment where the good ol’ boys club doesn’t dictate who participates in this beautiful sport. I don’t know exactly what that’s going to look like yet, or even how we’re going to get there. But I see the vision, and I believe in it. And one thing you should know about me is I’m stubborner than a mule and a harder worker by far. I’m going to work hard for these players and this team, and I expect you all to hold me accountable to that. That’s… that’s all.”
She went to move to the side but remembered herself. “Wait, one more thing… Francesca, I know you think I don’t know, but I cannot wait to keep sharing those sidelines with you. You’re a hell of a coach, and watching you work inspires me every day. You always have a place with me on my team. Our team.”
When Jade finally dragged her gaze away from Franny’s so she could see all the faces in the room, she noted plenty of apprehension along with joy. That was to be expected. She’d just announced some big shake-ups, and even the people who weren’t necessarily “good ol’ boys” tended to feel more comfortable with the way things had always gone.
That was all right. She’d already shown them once that she could get the job done. She had no problems showing them again. And again. And again. And again, if that was what it took. She was here now. She had her team, and she had her title. Which meant that she also had plenty of time.
In an instant, she was up in Landry’s arms, taking in the scent of Old Spice and Astroturf.
“Who said you were bad at giving speeches, huh?” he asked when he finally pulled away. “You might have missed your calling. You could write for the president or something.”
Jade curled her top lip. “I’d rather clean cleats for the rest of my life than do that.”
“Oh, trust me, girl, you’ll spend plenty of time doing that too with this job.”
“I’ll just make one of my underlings do it now that I’m in charge.”
Landry laughed deep in his belly. “Good luck with that. You’re going to get someone just like you who won’t let your shit slide.”
Jade peeked over her shoulder to spot Franny talking to her parents. Her heart filled even more, and the smile on her face grew to show it. “I might have already found her.”
“Mm-hmm.” Landry smirked. “I’m so proud of you, kid. You have no idea.”
“I think I do, Coach. I wanted to thank you again for holding me accountable, for giving me all the support I could possibly handle. Honestly, I don’t know how I’m going to do this without your guidance.”
“You won’t have to,” he said, tone firm. “I’m right here, Jade, right across town. I may not be a coach anymore, but I’m still Greenbelt’s biggest fan. I told Carla we had to hold off on the schooner until we know what we’re doing, but we got ourselves a little dinghy we’re taking up to Rhode Island in a few weeks. I don’t know when we’ll be back yet, but if you need me, call me. I mean that. You hear me?”
“Yes, sir,” she said. “I will. I promise. Just try to enjoy being retired, all right?”
“Enjoy being retired, my ass,” he scoffed, putting a hand on the side of her head. “Go kiss your girl, Coach. You’ve earned it.”
She didn’t need to be told twice either. Ten steps forward and she was taking Franny in her arms, dipping her at the waist, and laying one on her that was a mite inappropriate for mixed company.
And who could blame her? She was on top of the world.