Chapter 32 #2
But Draven just shoots me an annoyed look. “I know. I wasn’t lecturing you. I was confirming that he’s dead.”
“Oh.”
Blinking, I just stand there for a second. Then I glance down at the very dead man at my feet. I clear my throat, feeling both embarrassed that I snapped like that and grateful that Draven’s moral compass is as broken as mine.
“Yes, he’s dead,” I confirm.
“Good.” He jerks his chin. “Then let’s go.”
We spin around and dart through the messy living room until we reach the windows on the other side. After shoving one open, we leap out onto the deserted street beyond.
“We won’t be able to overtake Lavendera,” I say as Draven and I start running down the street so that we can circle the building and make our way towards North Gate.
“The others can handle it,” he replies.
“I want to handle it,” I growl back, fury streaking through me.
I want to be the one who kills Lavendera. I need to be the one who kills her.
He slides his gaze to me, glancing at me from the corner of his eye, while we continue running.
A small cloud of black smoke erupts beside me. I suck in a sharp breath as Draven suddenly hauls me up into his arms and shoots down the street, his wings beating hard on either side of him. My stomach lurches as he swerves around a corner and flies down the next street at full speed.
My mind has barely managed to catch up with what happened, so I draw in a deep breath and wrap my arms around his neck while houses flash past on either side of us.
Lying in his arms, I look up at his handsome face and try to read the expression there.
But only his usual mask of ruthless power and authority is visible on his features.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
“Don’t thank me.” He shoots me a look dripping with threats. “You will owe me severely for this. And when I come to collect, I expect complete obedience. Understood?”
“You can always have whatever you want from me. I thought you already knew that.”
His gaze darts down to mine, and there is another violent tug at the mate bond.
Draven sucks in a sharp breath between his teeth. Shaking his head, he snaps his gaze back to the street ahead and forces out, “Shut your mouth. Right now. Or I swear to God, I will drop you right here and leave you behind.”
A violent storm thrashes inside me, but I slowly close my mouth again.
Apparently satisfied, Draven picks up speed and flies around another corner.
My heart jerks hard in my chest when I realize which street we’re on.
But before I can scream at Draven to go back, to take any other road, any road except this one, we’re already halfway down it. And right next to it.
The house.
My parents’ house.
Regret crashes over me like merciless tidal waves. I stare at the door. The windows. The peeling paint on the outside walls.
A whimper of agony rips from my lips, thankfully drowned out by the booming of Draven’s wings, when I catch sight of the potted plants in the window.
They’re still there. My mom’s plants. Which means that all of their other things are still inside too. No one probably even knows that they’re dead. The house doesn’t know that they’re gone. That they’re never coming back.
My throat closes up as I twist my head and stare back at the doorstep when we fly past.
The doorstep where I have stood so many times when I’ve knocked on the door.
The doorstep I should have been standing on weeks ago.
It would’ve taken me less than five minutes.
Less than five minutes to go and see them.
Less than five minutes to talk to them. Less than five minutes to reach out with my magic and find out if they truly hated me or if they, deep down under a flame of magic I accidentally created, actually loved me.
I should have done it. I should have—
The house disappears behind me as Draven swerves around another corner and shoots straight for North Gate.
I gasp in a breath. It feels as if my heart was ripped out of my chest again. As if it’s now lying there on that doorstep outside my parents’ house, torn and bloody. Regret claws at my insides like vicious talons.
They might have loved me. All my life, they might have actually loved me. And now, I will never know.
The feeling of regret is so all-consuming that I barely realize that we’ve made it out of the city and across the grasslands outside.
When we reach the tree line, Draven simply dumps me on the ground. Since I still haven’t recovered from seeing my parents’ house like that, I just collapse down on the ground.
“How did it go?” Galen asks from somewhere above me.
Dragging in a deep breath, I try desperately to push the regret back. It doesn’t work, so I just let more of the hatred and anger into my soul so that I don’t feel the regret as sharply.
While Draven explains what happened, I stagger to my feet and dust myself off.
Alistair is already there too. Though, it looks like he has only just returned, because he is leaning against a tree trunk while his chest heaves.
Lyra is looking at Draven while he speaks, but Isera’s far too intelligent eyes are locked on me.
I quickly break eye contact. Out of all the people here, she alone understands my current feelings the most.
“She’s coming,” Alistair suddenly presses out between deep breaths.
We all whirl around to look at the road that leads from North Gate and straight into the thorn forest. Lavendera is jogging along it, heading towards us.
“Get into position,” Draven orders.
While Lavendera makes her way towards us, we quickly spread out so that we’re covering all angles in case something goes wrong. I move to a position behind a thick tree trunk so that I can step out right behind Lavendera once she crosses the tree line.
My heart slams against my ribs as I watch her get closer.
Once she is almost at the tree line, she slows down.
There is a soft smile on her lips as she sweeps her gaze over the trees before her. For the first time in all the time that I’ve known her, she looks genuinely happy.
If she only knew what is waiting for her in here.
I slide the dagger from my thigh holster.
Lavendera strolls closer.
Blood pounds in my ears and a storm of rage and hatred thrashes through my soul.
Lavendera Dawnwalker, traitor to the entire Seelie Court and my former friend, will die in ten seconds.
I will kill her in ten seconds.
And I feel no guilt whatsoever.
I flex my fingers on the hilt of my knife while bitter rage claws at my chest.
If I can’t have my happily ever after, no one can.