57. Real
We showered separately, not how I imagined this night going, but I could tell that pussy ass pretty boy had put her in a mood. I was going to do my best to get her out of it, but the short version of their story that Theory had given me let me know it wasn't going to be easy. Dudes like Tate Thibadeau made it hard for everybody.
The soft sounds of her tentative steps snapped me out of my thoughts. I glanced up from the bed, where I’d been sprawled out, flipping through some old paperback I’d found on her nightstand. Love walked out, her hair damp, wrapped in nothing but a towel that clung to her like it was holding on for dear life. She looked... distant. Like she was here but not really here. Her eyes met mine for a split second before she looked away, and I could feel the toll the day took on her.
“Hey,” I said, trying to keep my tone light, like I hadn’t just watched her ex-boyfriend try to flex his way back into her life at the fair. His sorry ass almost made me go to jail by being free with his hands.
I couldn’t worry about that when my perfect vision now had flaws across her features. “You good?”
She didn’t answer right away. Instead, she walked over to her dresser, her movements stiff, almost mechanical. She yanked open a drawer and pulled out a pair of panties and a tank top, not even bothering to pretend like she wasn’t ignoring me. The towel dropped, and for a second, I was distracted—hell, I was only human—but then I caught the look on her face.
Cold.
Closed off.
Like she was building a wall brick by brick, and I wasn’t sure if I had the tools to tear it down—again. Before we could lose our forward progress, I had to try to change the atmosphere I felt shifting between us.
“Love,” I tried again, sitting up straighter. “Talk to me.”
She finally turned to me, her expression blank. “What’s there to talk about, Real? It’s been a long day. Mentally, I don’t have the words to address anything other than my dreams. Goodnight. I’m tired.”
“Yeah, I get that,” I said, running a hand over my waves. “But you’ve been quiet since we left the fair. I’m tryna make sure you know I’m here for you however you need me to be. I just wanna make sure you’re okay.”
She shrugged, slipping the tank top over her head. “I’m fine. Really. Just... let’s not make this a thing, okay?”
I frowned. “Not make what a thing? How you acting? Cuz the fact that you flipping out over ya ex is definitely a thing, shorty. Or do you mean us? Last I checked, we agreed this wasn’t just about sex anymore. Or did that change when Tate showed up?”
It was impossible not to feel a way. If anybody knew how hard it was to break down Love’s walls they would understand my feelings of trepidation at her blanket statement. I hoped my expression didn’t freak her out.
Her eyes flashed, and for a second, I thought she was going to snap at me. But then she just sighed, walked over to the bed and climbed on top of me. Her hands went to my shoulders, and she leaned in, her lips brushing against mine.
“Can we do something other than talk right now?” she whispered, her voice low and husky.
I caught her wrists before she could go any further, holding her back. “Love, stop.”
She froze, her eyes narrowing. “What’s the matter, Real? You don’t want me?”
My eyebrows drew together at the way she tried to play me.
“Ain’t a moment in the day that I don’t crave your fine ass,” I said, my voice low but firm. “But this? Using sex to avoid whatever’s going on in your head? That’s not gon’ work. Not with me. We better than that. Tell me what you thinking.
She pulled back, her expression hardening. “Fine. If you don’t want this, just leave.”
She started to get up, but I grabbed her arm, stopping her. “That’s not what I said, and you know it. Stop twisting my words. I’m not Tate. There is no way I’d ever play in your face like that nigga. You can trust me right now, Love. I wanna be here with you, but I’m not gon’ let you use me as a distraction just because you’re pissed off at him and a past that ain’t even relevant.”
For a second, she looked like she was going to argue. Then, something in her seemed to break, and she slumped against me, her forehead resting on my chest.
“I’m so damn mad,” she muttered, her voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t know how to deal with seeing him, after everything. I don’t love him anymore. He’s weak to me. But I wanna slap the fuck out of him. I prayed I never had to see him again in life. His presence threw me off. I just want to forget.”
I wrapped my arms around her, holding her close. “I get it. But shutting me out ain’t it. You don’t have to do this alone, Everly Love. I’m here.”
She didn’t say anything for a long time, just stayed there, her breathing slow and steady against me. Finally, she looked up, her eyes meeting mine.
“I don’t know what I’m doing, Real. Seeing him today brought everything back. All the shit he and others put me through. All the ways they made me feel like I wasn’t enough. Wasted my time and innocence. This is why I have my rules, so I don’t get hurt in places I thought were healed.”
I cupped her face in my hands, forcing her to look at me. “Listen to me. You are enough. More than enough. I’m the one here, and I’m not one of the weak ass niggas who made you feel lacking. Tate’s trash ass doesn’t get to have power over you anymore. Not now, not ever.”
She nodded, but I could still see the doubt in her eyes. “I don’t want to talk about him anymore,” she said quietly. “I don’t want to talk about anything anymore. Can you just please fuck me until my thoughts are gone?”
I hesitated, then nodded. “Yeah. We can do that.”
She kissed me then, slow and deep, her hands tangling in my beard. My palms cupped her voluptuous ass as I got lost in the softness of her lips. My mind drifted until I felt Love reach for me through my boxer briefs, grab my dick, and slam herself down on me.
“Oh, God, I missed that!” she whispered as she worked her hips.
Her pace was agitated. I had to hold onto her waist to prepare for the ride she took me on. Everly placed her hands on my chest and rose on her tip-toes, before cinching my body within her legs and riding me harder. My eyes popped open.
Love sat atop me with her eyes closed. Her head full of wild curls bounced with her efforts. Sweat dotted her brow as she moaned softly. Shorty wasn’t even looking at me. Anger rose in me as I realized that, despite all the shit I’d said, she was using me.
She was disconnected from the moment as she took what she needed from me. It wasn’t the passionate connection we normally experienced. Pissed off and wanting to get it over with, I flipped her over, put one leg in the crook of my arm, and began pounding her. I was beating her pussy from various angles, doing anything to bring her back to the present. But as I stared down at her, her eyes were still closed, feeding my rage.
She winced once and tried to scoot back. I grabbed her hips and slammed into her.
“Nah, Ev. This is what you wanted, right? Stop all that damn running. Take what you asked for.”
At my words, I felt her walls clenching and unclenching around my shaft.She came and I changed our position again. I fucked her all over that room in the cold, absentminded way she deserved. We ended up with her taking ruthless back shots as she wept. Finally, I felt my release slam into me, and she screamed as she climaxed seconds later.
As soon as the last drop left her body, I snatched my still-hard dick out of her, stood up, then began searching for my clothes. The most immediate feeling I had was the need to get away from her before I crashed out.
“What the hell are you doing? All these weeks of insisting you sleep with me, and now you getting dressed like it isn’t already bedtime?”she asked, hoarse from the way I’d made her scream.
My gaze dropped to her. Everly had the nerve to be sitting up with her arms folded over her breasts in anger. She was the most confusingly emotional woman I ever met. Looking at her, I knew that if I didn’t stand on business, we wouldn’t ever progress.I didn’t even know if I wanted the progress anymore.
“Why am I staying here trying to fight for something that is only important to me?”
The puzzled expression on her face only pissed me off further.
“Real, are you being serious right now? Why are you acting like a little bitch?”
No, the fuck this girl ? —
She shrieked as I grabbed her throat and pushed her back on the bed.
“Love, don’t disrespect me, or I will introduce you to real problems, real fast. I took time away from my life and my businesses to show you effort and how much I value this relationship. Yet, you let the real little bitch ruin my progress and turn you back into the icicle I spent time thawing.”
“All of this over some sex? Because I wanted to forget a troublesome moment in my life? You overreacting, and I don’t have time to coddle your sensitive ass feelings.”
I wanted to squeeze until the lack of oxygen caused her to have an epiphany.
“I’m the soft one? Who’s the one living her whole life dictated by the actions of weak men from years ago? You act like you so secure, but just the sight of that nigga put your head in a place it shouldn’t even go to. You the little bitch, Love, and I’m sick of your shit.”
And then, I chose peace over violence, yanking my hand away from her.
“You know what? I’ma let you make it. I’ma leave you with these thoughts. In the time that we have been having sex, have I ever approached you with anything other than respect? Yet, you just fucked me like you a nigga who just came home from a bid and needed to get the first one out of the way.That shit turned me off. If you want to dwell in the past and not embrace your future, be my guest. I won’t keep letting you play with me when I revealed my hand already. I’m not the nigga who hid and rejected you. I’m not the nigga who stalked and tried to control you, and you not gon’ treat me like I am. You and Tate and Raouf can have this shit.”
With that, I turned and headed out of the door.