Chapter 29 Violet
VIOLET
“We should go back to Saint View.” My voice sounded as broken as my heart felt.
Whip pulled me into his arms and held me tight. “We can’t go anywhere tonight. I’ve been drinking, and it’s too late. Come back to the hotel. We’ll leave first thing in the morning.”
All I could think about was where Nyah was.
If she was alive or dead.
That while I’d been here, having fun, she was probably lying somewhere, bleeding out.
Or worse, still alive, and being psychologically and physically tortured by the psychopath who’d killed Toby and Dickson.
The one who’d set up a fucking nanny cam so he could watch it all with sick satisfaction.
The one who tried to push me over the edge of a cliff and who had failed but had nearly cost X his life instead.
Nyah was no match for him. She was bright and sharp and smart, but she was one person.
And he’d had her for days.
Deep down, we’d all known it was a possibility. But we’d come on this wild goose chase because the psycho messing with us had always been one step ahead. We didn’t know how to find him. We didn’t know where to look.
Praying Nyah’s sadistic, Mafia family had her had been the easy route.
But now I realized we’d made a vital mistake.
I let the three of them guide me out of the club and into the back of Whip’s car. I didn’t know who drove. I was too numb to pay attention and safe in the knowledge Whip would have never let one of them get behind the wheel if they’d had too much to drink.
I didn’t know where Dax was, and I couldn’t bring myself to ask. Just trusted one of them would have made sure he got back to his hotel safely.
My head was right back in the past, reliving every trauma. The attack at the house on Olympic Drive when all I’d wanted to do was my job.
Being locked in a warehouse, excited to meet the man I already knew I was in love with, only to lose the best friend I’d ever had.
That night up on the bluffs, standing in the pouring rain, explosions ringing in my ear and watching the three men I loved go over the edge of the cliff into the swirling void below.
“He’s never going to stop, is he? He doesn’t even want us dead. He just wants us scared. He’s the cat and we’re the mice.”
Nobody could assure me otherwise, and I was glad they didn’t try.
We pulled up outside the hotel X and Levi and I had dropped our bags and the cat at earlier in the night when Whip had needed to be alone. We made our way straight up to our room without stopping at reception.
Harold snored from his carrier in the corner of the room. We’d left it open for him, but clearly he was protesting even being here at all by refusing to move out of it.
Two king-size beds filled the room, leaving plenty of space for all four of us to sleep. And that’s exactly what we should have been doing. It was already after midnight, and we needed to leave as early as possible.
To do what exactly, I didn’t know. I just needed to get back to Saint View. To storm the police station and demand they do something more. To knock on every door of every house and find out where Nyah was.
It was my fault she was missing.
My fault Toby had died.
My fault this guy kept coming after us.
I couldn’t say exactly why, but my gut knew that everything that had happened was because of me and that night on Olympic Drive.
“Violet,” Whip urged. “Get into bed, sweetheart. You need to sleep.”
But I shook my head. I was tired, but I knew as soon as I closed my eyes, I was going to see blood. Tears. The face of Paul Jeddersen as he’d loomed over me, as he’d cut off my clothes and touched me.
I was going to see that bear watching it all, someone on the other side getting sick pleasure out of my pain and fear.
“Touch me,” I whispered. “I don’t want to sleep.”
Whip looked at the other two, as if checking they thought it was okay to give me what I was asking for when I was clearly in a state.
“Please,” I whispered. “I don’t want to sleep. I can’t. Not until I know she’s okay.”
Whip stopped hesitating. He stepped in behind me and drew down the zipper on the back of the dress I’d bought with X at a thrift shop that afternoon.
It was sparkly blue and covered from neckline to hem in glittery sequins.
It was slightly too small and clung to my curves, but it had been so fun I hadn’t been able to resist buying it.
I knew I’d never wear it again. It would be a constant reminder that I never got a night off. I never got to have any fun.
He wouldn’t let me.
He always found a way in. A way to ruin everything, even when he wasn’t there.
He’d found a way to live in my head, and that was the biggest betrayal of all.
The dress pooled on the floor at my feet, and I kicked it away to the corner, never wanting to see it again.
I turned in my underwear and unbuttoned Whip’s shirt. Then Levi’s. Then X’s. They all watched me carefully, taking their cues from me, moving slowly. Levi undid my bra, and I pulled it off.
None of us had bothered to turn on the lights. We were high up, and the city lights from outside shone in, giving us more than enough light to see. There were buildings just as tall as ours across the street, and I idly wondered if the occupants of them could see us.
Then decided I didn’t care. What did any of it matter?
How long would it be before I was dead and buried and nobody would ever see me again?
Either this guy was going to find me and kill me himself. Or he was going to torture me into a grave by taking out the people I loved one by one.
All three of these men were in danger, and I was suddenly sure, despite who they were and what they did, it was all because of me.
It was me the killer wanted to torture.
They were just collateral damage.
I dragged my panties off and crawled onto the nearest bed. I lay down, head sinking into a soft pillow I was sure I didn’t deserve when Nyah had been out there somewhere in the cold for days.
I squeezed my eyes shut tight, not wanting to think about it but unable to get it out of my head.
The mattress dipped beneath me, but I didn’t open my eyes.
I didn’t need to. I already knew it was X in front of me, his warm fingers finding mine, his gentle hands guiding me out of the defensive ball I’d curled myself into.
He draped my arms around his neck and fit his thigh between mine.
Our bodies connected, his naked skin against mine, him burying his face in the crook of my neck and whispering I didn’t need to worry about anything because he had me.
Oh, how I wished I could fully believe that. How I wished I could just let myself off the hook that easily and place all the stress and worry on someone else.
But it didn’t work like that.
Levi fit himself behind me, Whip behind him. With all four of us on our sides, we could fit on the bed. Barely, but nobody moved for the spare, and I was grateful for it.
I needed them close. Needed their bodies to remind mine to keep breathing, to keep functioning, even when it felt like everything else around me was on fire and I was in Hell.
X’s lips found mine, like he knew my brain was whirring a million miles a minute. He kissed me, quieting the blame inside my skull.
I tightened my arms around him, kissing him back with everything I had, loving the way everything about him was familiar now.
Was this seriously the man I’d been so scared of? I’d run from him, more than once. I’d screamed at the sight of him. Been so damn sure that with his fingers around my neck, he was going to kill me.
He was now everything that represented safety. I dragged his hand up to my throat, needing the touch of him there, trusting him with everything I had.
He squeezed my throat lightly as we kissed, and the slight lack of oxygen made my head spin pleasurably. I wriggled closer to him, moving my leg up his thigh until it hooked over his hip.
“Fuck me,” I whispered to him, not missing the hint of desperation in my tone.
He was already there, dick hard and waiting at my entrance.
I didn’t need foreplay. Didn’t want it. Hell, I wanted the burn. The stretch. The distraction with the way he could make my body feel.
He wouldn’t give it to me. He teased my entrance with the tip of his cock, giving me just the tiniest bit and reaching between us to rub my clit.
Despite me trying to punish myself, my body responded to his, loosening up, muscles relaxing. He didn’t stop until arousal pooled at my core, and when his dick slid inside me, it wasn’t a punishment.
It was with sweet words and gentle movements, him refusing to hurt me even though I wanted him to.
Why this man had ever been scared of killing me was beyond my comprehension. He couldn’t even hurt me when I was begging him to.
Levi kissed my neck from behind, while X thrust into me. His lips were warm and soft, and his fingertips wandered all over my skin, lighting up little trails of fire wherever he touched.
He moaned, but I knew it was nothing I was doing, so it had to be what Whip was doing to him.
I waited until X pulled out, and then I twisted, rolling over so I could kiss Levi too.
Whip had his hand over Levi’s hip and was stroking him, jerking his cock.
Levi desperately sought out my mouth, needing that contact, and I gave it up to him without hesitation. He gripped my face, kissing me hard, panting into my mouth. I lifted my leg to rest on top of his, opening myself up for him.
But it was Whip who guided his cock to my entrance.
Levi slid in easily, my pussy already well prepared by X.
I reached back, finding X’s wet cock and drawing it between my ass cheeks, letting him know exactly what I wanted.
He nudged open my rear hole, toyed with it, adding pressure to Levi’s deep thrusts and hitting every pleasure point my body stored there. X slid in inch by inch until I was taking both of them.
They sandwiched me, and my body came alive, my breathing too fast, but only because of the pleasure. The panic ebbed away, no place for that here when they were touching me like they were.