Chapter 37 Violet #2
By the time we got to Clean Sweep and Whip stopped the car, I was really pretty sure I was going to vomit at some point today.
Whip got out, and despite my trying to shoo him away, he insisted on walking me inside, clutching my arm like I was eighty and might fall and break a hip if he didn’t hang on to me.
“You’re babying me,” I told him as we reached the doors.
“I’m not. You’re sick and insisting on going to work. If I was babying you, I would hoist you up into my arms and carry you to the car and back to bed.” He paused and looked at me funny.
My heart tripped over itself at the expression on his face.
“You’re sick. And you’ve been feeling off every day for a few days now.”
Shit. I thought I’d hidden the bouts of nausea better than that. Maybe I’d done enough to keep it from X and Levi, because they had no experience with pregnancy.
But Whip had watched his wife do this twice. He knew the signs.
“Violet,” he practically whispered. “Are you pregnant?”
I felt everything all at once. Joy and excitement. Fear and nerves. Embarrassment to have kept it from him, even though in my heart I knew I’d been in shock and just needed time to process everything.
A slow smile crept across my face, and I nodded.
He said nothing but swept me into his arms, holding me so tight I could hear every beat of his too-fast heart. “God, I love you,” he murmured.
There were no questions about whether the baby was his or not. No questions on whether all four of us would raise it together. Those questions had already been answered when we took in two kids who needed a home. They’d been answered when three men let me love all of them and hadn’t made me choose.
Telling Whip he was going to be a dad again was the sweetest moment I could have imagined for him.
Apart from the fact I really needed to vomit.
It rose up my throat, and the last thing I wanted to do was puke on the man right after I’d confessed we were having a baby. I shoved inside the Clean Sweep doors and sprinted for the bathroom on the other side of the office.
Francine squeaked out something, but I slammed the door shut behind me, only just making the toilet bowl.
Once my stomach was empty, I almost instantly felt good again. I cleaned up and pushed open the door to find Whip and Francine on the other side, hovering nervously.
Francine handed me a tissue and patted me awkwardly on the arm.
“Feel better?” Whip brushed my hair back off my face and tucked it behind my ear. “I’m going to go get you some saltines. Unless you want to come home?”
I glanced at Francine, who tried to fix her scowl into something more friendly.
I almost laughed at her. At least she was trying to act like she cared, but I could tell the last thing she wanted was for me to go home and have to cover my shifts for a sixth day.
I knew I’d pushed my luck with her as far as I could. “I’m fine,” I assured them. “I feel much better, I promise. I’m here, I might as well work.”
Whip seemed like he wanted to argue, but Francine beamed at me. “Thank you, Violet! This is exactly why I’m making you employee of the month. Look.”
She pointed at the wall, and to my surprise, I found a photo of myself on it. It was the headshot I’d had taken on my first day for my ID badge, and it wasn’t exactly flattering, but she’d taken the time to frame it, and there was a sticker beneath it saying: Employee of the Month.
Nyah’s photo was on the wall next to mine. I hadn’t even noticed the last time I’d been in here. I pointed at it. “You gave Nyah employee of the month too?”
Francine rolled her eyes. “Well, yes, but that was before she up and disappeared without even giving me two weeks’ notice, like her contract stated.
So in hindsight that was a little premature of me.
I’ve been listening to business podcasts, and I keep hearing that keeping good staff happy is the key to a successful business. ”
Nyah’s photo sat next to the last employee of the month, who was the woman who’d trained me. She’d left barely days after I’d started. And there were no employees of the month in between. So clearly this initiative hadn’t exactly been high on Francine’s priority list.
But it was the thought that counted, and I could tell she was trying to make an effort to improve morale and her business practices.
Anything so she didn’t have to clean toilets herself, I guessed.
Whip studied the wall and then pulled out his phone. “Stand next to it.”
“What?” I laughed. “Like I’m one of the kids with their school awards?”
“Exactly like that! We’d take a photo of the kids if they won something. Why wouldn’t we do it for you too?”
I glanced at Francine, and she also had her phone out and was shooing me toward the wall.
“Go on, Violet. I’ll put it on the Facebook page. My podcasts say social media marketing is also very important for small businesses.”
I couldn’t deny both of them, so I shuffled over to it and gave them a cheesy smile.
Francine’s flash went off, but it was the honest pride on Whip’s face that really got to me. I’d never had anyone love me so much they thought I was all that just because my employer had stuck a photo of me up on an outdated wall of honor.
But I knew that if it was him, I would have done exactly the same.
Francine moved back to her desk, muttering curses about technology and why she couldn’t find the upload button on her app, and I took the opportunity to step into Whip, who was still grinning up at the stupid photo like I’d just won a Nobel Prize or something.
I dragged him away and pushed him toward the door. “I’d kiss you for being so sweet if I hadn’t just puked.”
He chuckled and stepped out, his fingers grazing my belly that had absolutely no outward signs of the baby growing inside it. “Have you told the others yet?”
I shook my head.
He nodded, but I could see the pleased uptilt of his lips that he was the first. “I won’t say anything. But, Vi, you gotta tell them soon. What are you waiting for?”
I no longer knew. Suddenly I wanted to run home and shout it from the rooftops to every person I knew.
I wanted to call my brother and Rebel and Bliss.
I wanted to tell old Mrs. Sinterro, who I cleaned for every week.
I wanted to get Harold a little shirt that announced he was going to be a big brother.
I couldn’t spend my life living in the shadow of the things I’d done to Travis.
That would be a life half lived, and I’d already been kept small for too much of this one lifetime I was getting.
I couldn’t live in the grief of losing Toby, or in the ache that existed without Nyah here to celebrate with.
I wanted to live for the people I did still have. They deserved that.
I deserved it.
I deserved to be happy. “Tonight,” I promised him. “I’ll tell them all tonight. It’s time we had something good to celebrate.”
“Violet!” Francine called from inside. “Meeting is starting!”
Whip kissed me quick, his eyes crinkling at the corners with how happy he was. “We’re having a baby, Violet.”
Yes, we really were.