Chapter 10 Lexi
I follow Reaper into the kitchen where the welcoming scent of fresh coffee and pancakes fill the air. It’s almost midnight, but Nina’s created a spread fit for a king. Reaper grabs a plate and sits at the kitchen table next to Ace. Nina’s sitting across from him, finishing off one last bite of pancake. Ace beams up at me from where he’s perched in his chair, his little legs swinging.
“Hey, buddy,” I say, forcing a smile. “Were you being good for Nina?”
“Yep!” He pumps his fist. “We made pancakes with chocolate chips, and tomorrow, we’re going to make meatloaf for dinner.”
“That’s great,” I say, but my tone lacks his enthusiasm.
Nina glances up, her eyes soft and understanding. “Don’t worry, Lexi. Ace is gonna have a blast with us. The other kids will get along great with him.” She ruffles Ace’s hair, and he giggles.
“Thanks, Nina. This means a lot.” I pull Ace into a hug that’s maybe too tight. “Listen to Nina, okay?” He squirms against my chest.
“Okay, Momma,” he says, voice muffled by my jacket.
I release him and turn to Nina, my fingers fidgeting with the frayed edge of my sleeve. “I’m … I’m kinda nervous about this. Letting him go, y’know?”
“I get it.” Nina smiles. “But trust is what we do here. I’ve got your back. And Ace’s. We all do. You used to be family. Maybe you will be again.”
“We’ll see,” Reaper says, chewing a mouthful of pancakes.
I want to ask what he means, but the butterflies flitting in my belly won’t let me. Family is such a loaded word, especially around here.
“Ace will be fine. Nina’s some kind of child whisperer, anyway.”
“Comes with the territory,” Nina says, grinning. “Over the years, I’ve learned a thing or two about keeping kids happy and safe.”
“All right.” I nod, more to convince myself than her. “He’s all yours. But please don’t overload him with sugar.”
“I can’t make that promise.” Nina smirks.
I can’t help but laugh as tension eases out of my shoulders. Ace joins in, giggling while grinning at his new best friend.
The clatter of Matrix’s heavy boots grows louder as he enters the kitchen.
“Reaper,” he grunts in a deep voice that seems to vibrate through the walls. “I need to head out. Daisy needs me.”
“All right, brother. Handle your business,” Reaper responds with a nod. “Don’t keep that wife of yours waiting or she’s liable to whip out the handcuffs.”
“In that case, she can wait. It’s been a few days since she last used them.” Matrix’s wicked grin surprises me, and I can’t help but stare.
“You’re married?” I blurt out, my curiosity getting the better of me.
Matrix turns to me, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, as if the idea of him being domestic is some kind of joke. “Yeah, Daisy’s been puttin’ up with my shit since we tied the knot last year.”
“Wow, are any of the other guys married?”
“Most of us are,” Matrix says, leaning against the doorway. “Everyone except Reaper.”
“Never gonna happen, brother,” Reaper grumbles.
“You say that now,” Nina says, glancing at me. I shift uncomfortably.
“Does everyone have kids too?” The words tumble out before I can stop them.
“Yep,” Nina chimes in again as she walks toward the sink with a pile of dishes. “Everyone except Talon and Jessica. They aren’t planning on little ones anytime soon.”
My mind whirls, trying to reconcile these tattooed, leather-clad warriors with the image of fathers and husbands. How do men who live by such a brutal code manage to find love and create families? It’s a paradox that doesn’t fit within the neat lines of the world outside this clubhouse.
“Take care, Lexi,” Matrix says, lifting his chin in farewell before striding out.
“Bye, Matrix,” I call out, still lost in thought as the roar of his motorcycle fades into the distance.
Nina finishes loading the dishwasher and starts the cycle. She quickly handwashes the griddle she used to make the pancakes.
“Well, now that everything’s done, we should get going too,” Nina says. “Ready to see my house?”
“Yeah! Can I ride a horse too?”
“What?” I exclaim, skewering Nina with a look of warning.
“Maybe. But not tonight. It’s sleepy time, Ace.” Nina herds him toward the door with a gentle hand on his shoulder.
“Be good for Nina,” I tell Ace, the lump in my throat growing as I watch my little boy wave goodbye, his face alight with the promise of adventure.
“Always am,” he shoots back, a cheeky grin plastered across his face.
Nina gives me a reassuring look, but I know she’ll keep him safe. It’s just mom nerves getting the best of me.
I follow them out onto the porch. Nina’s car hums to life, and I stand there, watching them pull away until they disappear down the road.
Now, it’s just Reaper and me, alone in the silence of the clubhouse. The air feels heavier, charged with an unspoken tension that wraps around us like a thick chain. I realize I’ve been holding my breath, afraid to break the quiet, afraid of what might happen next in this private world we’ve suddenly found ourselves in.
When I step back inside, the silence of the clubhouse presses against my skin, thick and suffocating. Reaper moves, a predator closing in on its prey, and I can’t help but feel like a rabbit caught in a snare. His steps are silent, but I sense the shift in the air, the change in the atmosphere as he corners me.
“Why’d you run away, Lexi?” His voice is a low rumble that vibrates through the room and into my bones. He’s close now—too close. The memory of why I left claws at my insides.
“I didn’t feel safe anymore,” I whisper, wanting to add that I don’t feel safe now either, not with the way he’s eyeing me. I take a step back, and then another, trying to put distance between us. His eyes narrow and he leans in, enveloping me with his presence.
“Why the hell not?” he demands, his breath hot against my cheek.
“Because …” My back hits the cold, unyielding wall. “I saw something I shouldn’t have. I know what you are, Reaper.” The confession feels like shedding skin, painful and revealing.
Reaper’s hands slam against the wall on either side of my head, caging me in. His shadow looms over me, dark and foreboding. “What the hell does that mean? You used to like being with me. A lot. You loved riding on the edge, Lexi. What changed?”
His face is inches from mine. My gaze locks onto his stormy eyes. I once found solace in those dark depths, but now, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to see anything but violence in them. My heart hammers in my chest, each beat screaming at me to run, to flee from the danger he embodies. But my body betrays me, yearning for the heat of his touch and the thrill of his nearness.
“Tell me,” he whispers, his voice a seductive caress that makes me want to spill every secret I’ve ever kept.
I swallow hard, trying to find my voice, but it’s lost in the labyrinth of my longing. Part of me is furious for being so weak, so drawn to the man who represents everything I fear. Yet another part, a primal and shameless part, craves the intoxication of his dangerous aura. It’s a battle between my past and my present, between the life I fled and the desire that still burns within me.
“Nothing’s changed,” I finally manage to say, though it’s barely above a whisper. “I guess I never stopped wanting dangerous men.”
His smirk is a silent victory, and I hate myself for giving him that satisfaction. But as much as I try to deny it, Reaper has awakened something within me, an ember thought long dead threatening to ignite a blaze so hot it will burn what’s left of my life to ashes.
“Tell me the truth about why you left.” Reaper’s voice is low and menacing. “Or I’ll spank you harder than I used to.”
Heat floods my pussy while my heart jackhammers against my ribs. His threat should terrify me, yet it doesn’t. Instead, it leaves me gasping for air while my mind races with memories of past punishments that had been all too pleasurable.
Reaper’s hands are on me, and before I can register what’s happening, he spins me around and presses my chest against the cool wall. The rough texture is nothing compared to the roughness of his body pressed against mine. I can feel every hard line of him against my back, the undeniable evidence of his arousal. It sears through my clothes, scorching my senses.
A sharp nip at my earlobe jolts me from my daze. He bites just hard enough to sting before his tongue soothes the tender flesh, sending shivers cascading down my spine.
“We’re alone now. No one will hear you scream,” he whispers, his breath hot against my ear, his voice a tantalizing mix of danger and desire. “I remember how wild you used to be. Is that part of you still inside? Did you lock it up away from everyone but me?”
“Reaper,” I moan.
I should be scared. Every instinct screams at me to push him away, to reclaim the control over my life that I fought so hard to establish. But the fear is overshadowed by an all-consuming need, a hunger that has lain dormant within me until this moment. As he overwhelms me with his presence, the world narrows down until the only thing that exists is the space between us. It’s filled with electric anticipation.
“Tell me what you want,” Reaper murmurs, his voice dripping with a kind of predatory patience.
My lips part, but there’s no sound, only the ragged rhythm of my breathing. The tension coils tighter, a spring wound to its breaking point. He’s waiting for an answer, for an explanation I don’t have the strength to give—not when my body is betraying me, not when it’s screaming for his touch.
And as much as my mind protests, my body has other ideas. It longs to be claimed by the man who embodies peril, who stirs a dangerous lust within me. I don’t want to stop Reaper; I can’t—because in this twisted moment, the fear and thrill are indistinguishable.
So, I don’t.
“Reaper,” I breathe out, the name a prayer and a curse all at once.
And it’s all the invitation he needs.