Chapter 18 Lexi
Once we’re back on the road, questions swirl in my mind like the dust we kick up behind us. How exactly did Reaper heal that bird? How and when did he get that ability? Has he always had it?
When we reach the clubhouse, Reaper waits while I slide off the bike. We walk hand in hand through the boisterous clubhouse, ignoring the laughing and drinking prospects.
Once we’re inside his bedroom, the door shuts with a definitive click. Suddenly, it’s just us—no club, no secrets, nothing but the raw connection that always seems to ignite when we’re alone. His eyes hold mine, dark orbs etched with flecks of silver that seem to see right into the depths of my soul.
“I need you,” he breathes out, and the world falls away.
His lips find mine in a slow dance of desire, coaxing rather than demanding. Every brush of his mouth against mine, every deliberate caress of his hands as they roam over my body, tells me how much he cherishes these moments—how much he cherishes me.
“God, Lexi,” he murmurs against my skin. “There’s something about being with you …” His words trail off as if his emotions are too vast to be voiced.
We sink into the bed, our bodies entwining with an intimacy that goes beyond lust. There’s reverence in his touch, a sensual worship that leaves me breathless and longing for more. Our movements are languid, unhurried, as if time itself has slowed to savor the union of two fractured souls finding solace in one another.
“I love being with you,” he confesses, the growl in his voice softening to a vulnerable whisper. “Everything about this, about us, is perfect.”
At that moment, with the warmth of his body enveloping mine, I realize, despite all the uncertainties, there’s a simple truth resonating within my heart—I’m starting to love everything about this, too. I’m starting to fall for him.
“Make love to me,” I plead.
He enters me slowly, pushing each thick inch in until we’re fused together so completely I don’t know where I end and he begins. Moving with the beating of our hearts, we arch and roll our hips in perfect unity, both taking and giving in equal measure. The slow burn builds until we’re on the cusp of utter ecstasy.
“Now, Reaper. Please,” I whimper.
He grunts, thrusting hard, scraping his pelvic bone across my clit in that perfect angle that always sends me soaring. Undulating waves of pleasure expand out from that soft spot, radiating through me until I’m filled with an energy that feels like love because it is.
Although he’s never said it, I think he feels it. The way he moves proves it, and it doesn’t need to be spoken for it to be real.
When he finds his release, he sobs against my throat. Lying inside me, he doesn’t move. In the cocoon of his arms, our breaths mingle in the quiet aftermath. My heart still hammers from the ecstatic bliss we shared, but it’s a different kind of pounding now—a thrumming echo of life’s fragility. Our love is so fresh and so new it feels fragile, as if anything could shatter it. So, as much as I’d love for him to say the words, I don’t push him.
He finally rolls onto his side and pulls me against his chest. “Do you need water?”
“No,” I whisper.
“Good, because I don’t think I’ll be able to walk for at least ten minutes,” he chuckles.
As we rest in silence, the questions I had at Nina’s come rushing back. Maybe now isn’t the best time to ask him about what happened with the bird, but I don’t want to wait too long. Also, he’s always less defensive after we have sex, so now’s the perfect time to broach the subject.
“Reaper,” I whisper as I trace the outline of his abs with my fingertips. “After the car accident … I had this moment. It felt like … like I was slipping away.”
He stiffens slightly, and I feel the shift in his energy. The room is dim, but there’s enough light to see the intensity in his eyes, a storm brewing in their black depths.
“You’re probably wondering about that and the bird,” he says with a sigh. “I knew you’d ask eventually.”
“That bird wasn’t dazed. It was dead.”
“Yes.
“Then, how …”
“There’s something I haven’t told you. About me.”
My pulse quickens, not with fear but with a hunger for the truth. “What is it?”
“I don’t really know where to start, so I’ll just say it.” He swallows hard. “I can bring back the dead.”
His confession hangs between us, heavy and surreal. It’s madness, right? But then, I think of the animal today and the way Reaper stood over it. Dead one minute. Alive the next.
“Tell me,” I urge, needing to understand what I saw.
“Years ago, when I was locked in Blackstone’s dungeon, something happened.” His muscles tense under my touch, the memory etching agony across his face. “Blackstone threw Matrix down the stairs. He was dead on impact.”
“Matrix died?”
“He was my best friend, and then he was gone. Gone, Lexi. And I … I couldn’t accept it. I couldn’t go on living without him. Surviving Blackstone was hard enough, but without Matrix, I knew couldn’t do it.”
“Oh, God,” I breathe out, unable to stomach the pain and fear in his voice.
“I couldn’t handle his death. I refused to accept it. So, I dragged him into the shadows, so we could be alone. I didn’t want any of the other kids anywhere near him. I cried and cried until something wild burst from me—blue sparks, like a damn fantasy novel.” He shakes his head as if he still can’t believe it. “I thought maybe magic was real. I was desperate, so I closed my eyes and silently called his name in my mind. I reached out into the universe and searched for any sign of him. God, this is so hard to explain.”
“And?” My own breath catches, riding on the edge of his story.
“I found him. A single thread connecting us. It was so faint, barely there.” He stops to gaze at me with the raw vulnerability of a terrified child. “I reached for it. Then I pulled and pulled, dragging him back from wherever he’d gone.”
“He came back,” I whisper.
“Yes.” He shakes his head as if he still can’t believe it.
“You brought him back from death. He’s alive because of you.” It’s not a question. It’s a realization.
“Because of whatever is inside me. I’m one with darkness, Lexi. We’re bound together.” He turns his face away, but I cup his cheek, drawing him back.
“What you have inside you is a gift,” I say firmly, though my mind reels with the implications. “You saved him.”
“Or cursed him,” he mutters, but I shake my head.
“No, never think that. He owes you his life.”
“He could have been left in peace, but I brought him back into that hellish basement. We were trapped there for another couple of years before we escaped.”
“Do the others know about this?” I ask.
“Yes. We’re all special in some way. The abuse did that to us.”
“What do you mean?”
“Scar sees people’s intentions and plans. That’s how we got out of the dungeon. Scar found out when Blackstone would be gone. Talon can talk to animals, which was another reason we escaped.”
“What about Nitro?”
“Nitro’s a medical intuitive. He feels other people’s pain in his body. He can diagnose illnesses before anyone else.”
“And Matrix?”
“Astral projection.”
“What’s that?”
“He can leave his body and go to other places. He can watch and listen to anything in another room, even if he’s not in it.”
“That’s impossible.”
“It’s not. It’s real. I’ve watched him do it. He knows things he couldn’t possibly know unless he was in the room.”
“That’s … I don’t even know what to say.” I shake my head slowly.
“Don’t say anything. I probably shouldn’t have told you any of this, but you deserve to know about me.”
I’m propped up against the headboard, the sheets a tangled mess around us. My mind whirls as I try to make sense of what Reaper just revealed to me. It’s like he’s opened the door to a world I never knew existed—one that both terrifies and fascinates me.
“Tell me more,” I urge him. “How exactly do you bring something back from the dead? Is it really just as easy as calling out to them and finding their life thread?”
Reaper shifts beside me, the muscles in his arms flexing as he props himself up on one elbow. His gaze is distant, like he’s sifting through memories to find the right words.
“It’s not just about bringing something back,” he begins. “It’s about connection. There must be something left to reach for. A spark that hasn’t quite gone out. If someone or something has been dead for longer than an hour, I can’t bring them back.”
I pull my knees up to my chest, feeling vulnerable in the face of such power. “And you can feel it? This … spark?”
“Yeah.” He nods slowly, his eyes meeting mine. They’re dark pools of mystery, and I’m drawn into their depths. “It’s like a hum, a vibration only I can sense. I latch onto it, amplify it until it fills whatever’s empty, until life rushes back in.”
“Does it hurt?” The question slips out before I can stop it, but it’s important. I need to know the cost of wielding such an ability.
“Like hell,” he admits, and there’s a shadow that passes over his features. “Every time, it rips me apart and puts me back together. But it’s worth it when it means saving someone who still has a chance.”
“Is that why you were so tired after the accident?”
“Yes.”
“Because I was dead, and you brought me back.”
“I couldn’t leave Ace without a mother. He’d end up in foster care if he didn’t have a father in the picture. I don’t know what came over me. I didn’t even realize it was you until after. I just knew I couldn’t put that kid through what I went through. Couldn’t risk it happening to him.”
“You’re amazing,” I say softly. His compassion for Ace prompted him to risk his own life to save someone he didn’t realize he knew. “Was that why it worked? Because we knew each other?”
“I’m not sure. It works on animals that I don’t have a connection with, so maybe it’s a size thing? Or maybe humans have a different kind of soul. Animals are pure while humans can be full of evil. That could be why. I don’t know.”
“I don’t understand it all either, not yet.” I breathe out, turning my face to press a kiss into his palm. “But I’m here, with you, because you fought for me. You have love in your heart. I know you do.”
“Maybe.” He pulls me into a tight embrace, silencing me.
As I lay in his arms, the warmth in my heart swells. He doesn’t realize how good he is. All he can see is his darkness. I need to find a way to show him who he truly is inside. I have no idea how to make that happen, but I’m going to figure I out. I won’t let his fear tear us apart. We belong together, and it’s only a matter of time before he realizes it too.