Chapter 12
HARPER
CHAPTER TWELVE
I’d made plenty of mistakes in my life. That tended to happen when you ventured into adulthood without any guidance. But the mistake I’d just made, losing my head and kissing Levi? The man who’d broken my heart—not just broken it, but demolished it? Well, I couldn’t think of anything dumber.
Especially considering I had to live with the man for the next five weeks. I was stuck there with nowhere else to go, which meant I was at his mercy.
But worse than all of that was how fucking good the kiss had been.
I’d had a lot of years to build up our chemistry in my mind. Inflate it to something far beyond actuality. After a decade of lackluster dating experience, I’d begun to think everything I had felt with Levi had been in my head. That there was no way at fifteen, sixteen, seventeen years old, we’d had the kind of chemistry I hadn’t been able to replicate. The kind I’d only read about in romance novels.
But from the second Levi’s lips had touched mine again, that assumption was blown out of the water. And I had no idea what the hell to do with that information.
The last thing I wanted to do right now was head back to the apartment, because from Levi’s quick, determined strides as he wove ahead of me through the few people remaining at the carnival, that was exactly where he was going. Unfortunately, I didn’t have any other options. The carnival was closing, and every business in Starlight Cove had shut its doors for the evening hours ago.
Despite Levi’s head start, he strode only a few paces in front of me, both of us heading straight for the exit. Neither of us acknowledging the other. That was fine with me. I needed time and space to process the kiss that never should’ve happened.
Once we made it to the parking lot, Levi headed to the right and toward a gleaming black-and-chrome motorcycle. Because of course the brooding asshole ex-boyfriend would have a motorcycle. I nearly rolled my eyes at the cliché of it all, but instead, I turned my attention toward the parking lot exit and the walk I had ahead of me. No way was Arthur still up and taking passengers.
“Where the hell are you going?” Levi called after me, drawing the attention of a few passersby.
I glanced back at him, finding his scowl pointed directly at me. “The apartment. Obviously.”
“Where’s your car?”
“Don’t have one.”
“So, what? You’re just going to walk?” he asked incredulously.
The parking lot was mostly empty, a few scattered cars here and there. It was nearing midnight, but I didn’t have any apprehensions of walking the streets of Starlight Cove this late. Mayberry had more crime than this little pocket of Maine.
I shrugged. “That’s the plan.”
“The fuck you are,” he said, voice hard. “Get on. I’ll give you a ride.”
“I’m good.”
He was silent for a moment, but it was the loudest quiet I’d ever heard. “I wasn’t asking, Harper.”
“Then it’s a good thing I don’t have to follow your orders.”
The rev of his engine cut through the air. And I was absolutely not going to examine the feelings warring inside me, equal parts relief and disappointment that he’d relented. That he hadn’t pushed harder. That he’d decided I did have it handled…just like always…and didn’t need anyone else’s assistance.
It was quite the mindfuck because while I definitely took care of my own shit, sometimes I wondered what it’d be like if I didn’t have to. If someone else had my back. If I could count on another person to take care of me for no other reason than I deserved it and not because they got something out of it.
I hadn’t even made it halfway through the parking lot before Levi’s motorcycle rumbled up in front of me, blocking my path, and I stopped dead in my tracks.
He was hot under normal circumstances, to an annoying degree. But him straddling a motorcycle, jaw set, eyes hard as he pinned me with his intense gaze? He should’ve been a registered crime against humankind. I hated that I remembered exactly what his lips felt like under mine…exactly what his tongue tasted like…the exact tenor of his throaty groan the second I’d opened my mouth to him…
“Get on the bike, Harper,” he said, voice low and firm. “We’re going to the same place.”
I crossed my arms over my chest and met his gaze with an unimpressed expression. “I can walk.”
“I never said you couldn’t. But it’s midnight and you’re alone. And I don’t give a shit if we live in the most boring town in the country, I’m not just going to drive off and let you walk home by yourself. Now, get on the fucking bike.”
I knew by his harsh tone and the steely, determined glint in his eyes that he wasn’t going to relent, just like the night of the thunderstorm. Would probably, in fact, ride alongside me the entire way home and throw out taunting jabs just because he could.
So, with a sigh, I relented and strode toward him before gingerly climbing onto the back of his bike, sitting as far back as possible.
Levi passed a helmet to me over his shoulder. “Put this on.”
“What about you?”
“Just put on the fucking helmet, sparrow.”
With a sigh, I did as he told me before gripping the handle behind my seat, preparing myself to hold on tight so I didn’t shift forward. It was bad enough that my legs bracketed his, especially considering the fact that I could feel the heat from his body seeping into mine. And especially considering the state of my pussy after that kiss. I needed to hold myself as far away from him as I possibly could.
He revved the engine and glanced back at me over his shoulder. “Hang on.”
“I am.”
I felt more than heard his sigh before he reached back and grabbed my arm, tugging it free from the handle and wrapping it around himself. I didn’t give myself even a second to register what his body felt like beneath my fingers before I snatched my hand away, placing it back on the bar. “I’m good like this.”
He glanced at me over his shoulder, his mouth set in a firm line, the tic of his jaw letting me know exactly what he thought of me and this line I’d drawn in the sand. Probably futile since he’d had his tongue in my mouth ten minutes ago, but I knew my limits. Wrapping my arms around him and holding tight was well past them.
This time when he revved the engine, we shot forward before he braked hard, effectively shoving me against his back. I let out a small squeak and wrapped my arms around him reflexively. And then before I even realized what he’d done, he took off like a bat out of hell. Tearing out of the parking lot and pointing us toward the main road that led here, his little tap on the outside of my thigh the punctuation to his silent then I’ll make you.
Because of the space needed for the carnival, it was set up on the outskirts of town. Still, Starlight Cove wasn’t exactly a metropolis and wasn’t super spread out. We should’ve been back to the apartment in five minutes, but from my not-at-all-accurate calculations, it had been more than double that as Levi took the road along the coast rather than cutting straight into town.
And through it all, I held on tight, Levi’s body warm and firm against me.
The full moon glittered on the surface of the ocean, the sound of crashing waves drowned out by the purr of the engine. The smell of the salty air combined with the scent of Levi made it easy to revert back in time. To the summers when it had felt as if we had nothing but forever stretched out in front of us. Nothing but possibilities.
I closed my eyes and allowed myself this moment when no one else was watching. I melted into his back, wrapping my arms more tightly around him, and imagined what life would be like if everything had been different.
There was no denying how good he felt against me, every inch of my body pressed against every inch of his. The solid warmth of him reassuring in a way that had no place here.
Because I already knew what was on the other side of anything when it came to Levi. Pure and absolute heartbreak.
And there was no fucking way I was venturing down that path again.