Chapter 14
HARPER
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Text thread with Mabel, Harper, and Levi:
5:57 p.m.
Mabel:
Don’t eat the cookies! I REPEAT: DO NOT EAT THE COOKIES!!! I mixed up my containers and gave you the ones that were supposed to be for book club!
Mabel:
Hello?
Mabel:
HELLO??
My body felt relaxed and heavy, like my mattress was a cloud I could sink straight into and never leave. Except for one thing—I was starving. But that wasn’t remotely adequate to describe what I was feeling. This uncontrollable need to inhale anything. Everything. Immediately.
As soon as I’d bitten off the bejeweled head of one of Mabel’s peen cookies, I’d gone straight to my room and sequestered myself away. It was safer that way. I didn’t want to chance being in a small space alone with Levi. Not after the other night. And definitely not after earlier in the kitchen when he’d once again proven he didn’t need to kiss me to make me lose my mind. Apparently, he could do that with a whisper of a touch and a handful of words, perfectly illustrating just how potent our chemistry still was. He’d easily had me conjuring up exactly what he’d suggested—me on my knees before him, worshipping his cock with my hands and my mouth.
My nipples tightened, my pussy thrumming with a need that had, frustratingly, never been present with anyone but Levi. Whether I wanted it to or not, my body responded to his soft, seductive tone and those weighted stares that made me feel like he saw straight through me. Made me feel like he knew me, though that was impossible. He didn’t know me. Not anymore. Maybe not ever.
After our little encounter, I’d locked myself away with no intention of leaving, despite the fact that I hadn’t eaten anything all night but a dick cookie. My stomach was reminding me of that now, loudly and uncontrollably.
Usually I kept a couple protein bars in my bag for instances like this. I’d traveled enough that I’d learned I didn’t want to be stuck somewhere without sustenance. But I’d eaten them on my travel day from hell and hadn’t replenished yet, which meant my room was barren.
But the kitchen wasn’t.
I tiptoed my way across my room before cracking open my door and poking my head out, glancing both ways to make sure the coast was clear. When I didn’t hear or see anything, certain Levi was tucked away in his bedroom, I crept out into the hall before beelining straight for the kitchen, my stomach rumbling the entire time.
I started at one end and worked my way around the space, opening and closing cupboards and drawers without much care or delicacy, but I was ravenous now. Too starved to think of anything but finding some snacks. Brownies or pretzels or crackers or chips. God, I really wanted some chips. If I didn’t find a bag in the next fifteen seconds, I was going to?—
“Need something, sparrow?” Levi’s low, controlled voice startled a scream out of me, and I whirled around, launching a potholder at his head.
It smacked him in the chest before sliding down and presumably landing on the floor. But I couldn’t drag my gaze away from the devil himself to verify.
He stood in the entryway to the kitchen, one shoulder propped against the wall, his massive arms crossed over his bare chest. And holy shit, had I ever seen anything so mouthwatering? His chest, dusted with dark hair, was thick and broad, his arms sculpted with the same ridiculous muscles and covered in ink that sure as hell hadn’t been there twelve years ago.
Back then, he’d been a bit lanky. Still cute in the mysterious bad boy kind of way, but nothing like the imposing man standing before me now.
Full sleeves covered both his arms up to his shoulders, other tattoos scattered up his sides and on his chest, an amalgamation of objects so perfectly blended together, it was hard to pull apart any single image. Part of me wanted to stroll right up to him and inspect each design. Study their shapes and dissect their meanings, demand he tell me what each one signified. Trace each delicate line with my fingers before using my tongue to see if he tasted as good as I remembered.
And the other part of me wanted to run away screaming, yearning for any amount of separation I could force between us. But that wasn’t going to work forever. Especially when I was stuck here, living with him for the time being, and we both needed to figure out how to deal with it. How to be in the same space without screaming at each other or shoving our tongues down each other’s throats.
So instead of doing either of those things, I planted my feet and stood my ground, pretending I wasn’t standing before him in my far-too-skimpy pajamas and attempting to give off an air of confidence I certainly didn’t feel. Never mind that my gaze continued its perusal of his body, sweeping over every carved inch of him before snagging on the indecently low waistband of his gray sweatpants. A shadow of hair at the bottom of his happy trail peeked out, catching my attention—he was definitely going commando—before my eyes dipped lower still.
It was then that I recalled exactly what had shut me into my room in the first place. My gaze caught on the nearly obscene outline of his cock, and I squinted one eye, wishing for my X-ray vision to finally manifest. Over the years, I’d had more than enough dreams featuring his dick to remember it. That had been twelve long years ago, though, and I wondered what it looked like now with a piercing through the tip. And God help me, but I wondered what it would feel like, too.
My breath grew shallow, thinking of what he was hiding beneath his sweatpants—good God, did it move? And somehow, despite all my reservations, despite knowing what a monumentally bad idea it would be…desperately wanting it. Wanting him.
“Well?” Levi’s voice was low and rough, the single syllable sounding like it was scraped straight from his throat. “You want to tell me what you need?”
His words sent awareness rocketing through my body, my nipples tightening into stiff peaks, and I was absolutely not going to give him the satisfaction of seeing that. Of knowing how much he affected me. How much he still affected me.
And definitely not after I’d made a fool out of myself during that kiss on the Ferris wheel, practically throwing myself at him.
I cleared my throat, the sound far too loud in the otherwise silent space, and crossed my arms over my chest. Lifting my chin, I regarded him with what I hoped passed for a bored expression. “Chips. I need chips.”
He studied me for a moment. Long enough that I started to shift on my feet, my body tingling at his undivided attention. And then he pushed off from the wall, dropping his arms to his sides as he stalked toward me. His eyes were dark and hungry, focused on me in a way that made it difficult to look away. He was all confidence and swagger, his presence taking up far more of the space than his body did. And I couldn’t deny how attractive I found it. How attractive I found him.
Not trusting myself, I twisted away from his approaching form, as much to hide my reaction as to force myself to stop ogling him. I faced the cabinets, rummaging through them once more to no avail. And then he stepped up behind me, the heat of his body seeping into mine and his crisp, clean scent surrounding me. His warm skin brushed against mine where I was bare, and I cursed myself for thinking it was a good idea to come strolling out here in nothing more than a tank top and a pair of lounge shorts. Like I was in my own apartment or hotel room where I didn’t have to worry about anyone else.
But I did have to worry.
I had to worry about Levi and this damn pull between us that wouldn’t fucking go away. This incessant hum beneath my skin that just wouldn’t quiet. The undeniable reactions my body still had to him.
He braced one hand on the counter next to my hip. With his other arm, he reached into the cabinet in front of me, effectively caging me in. His scent surrounded me, the warmth of him seeping into my bones. I didn’t move…didn’t dare even breathe. Afraid that the slightest shift would press more of my body against his when it already felt like I was on fire.
It didn’t matter, though, because he moved. Even with my eyes closed, I could sense him there, his face dipping closer to mine. His breaths swept over the exposed skin of my shoulder and across my collarbone, and my entire body broke out in goose bumps, my breathing growing ragged. I curled my fingers over the edge of the counter, hoping my grip would ground me when it felt like my entire body was at risk of floating away.
I couldn’t make sense of what he was doing, unsure where I ended and he began or why he was standing so close, his breath against the back of my neck, the fine wisps of hair at my nape fluttering with each one of his exhales.
“I’ve got exactly what you need, sparrow.” His voice was low in my ear, sinful like melted dark chocolate, and I had to bite my lip to stifle a moan, unwilling to let it escape.
My clit throbbed, my pussy clenching around nothing as he revved me up with little more than a handful of words and only the tease of his touch. God, what would it feel like to be with him like that again? To get lost in his body. See if my memories had overinflated everything or if it really was as good as I remembered.
A loud crinkling jerked me out of my daze, and I snapped my eyes open to find him holding a bright-yellow bag of chips in front of me. It was a bucket of ice water dumped over my head, a harsh shove back into reality. I exhaled sharply, feeling so fucking stupid for allowing myself to get lost in the pull that was Levi.
I knew better. And I needed to act like it.
Without thinking twice, I snatched the bag from his grasp and shoved my ass back against him, the move pulling a sharp grunt from him. And while that would’ve been satisfying under normal circumstances, I was distracted by the feel of him against my ass. Thick and hard and ready for me.
This was a bad idea. Such a fucking bad idea. To be this close to him when I was feeling so loose and languid, my body warm and soft for some reason I couldn’t explain.
Without a word, I strode out of the kitchen, needing some room to breathe. The old Harper would have retreated into her room, tucked herself away, and hidden. Been quiet. Docile.
But I wasn’t the old Harper anymore.
I’d lived that life for eighteen years. Had compressed myself to fit every narrow expectation my parents had of me. Had contorted myself to be who they saw fit for public consumption.
A glimpse of the Harper I was today had shone through during my years of friendship with Chase and Levi, back when we’d been kids. But it had been only small peeks, tiny sparks of who I would eventually become.
It was time Levi learned I wasn’t the old me anymore.
So, I didn’t slink away. I didn’t tiptoe down the hall and retreat into my bedroom. I took up space.
I sauntered into the living room, turned on the television, and sat right in the middle of the couch, uncaring as he watched me from the kitchen. Wanting him to. I needed him to see I wasn’t going to hide away like he probably assumed.
I needed him to see exactly who he was playing with now.