Chapter Nineteen #2
“Does Tarik know any of this?” I asked, not concerned that I was using his given name. If it was true and James had our secrets—my secret—in the palm of his hand, then our actual lives were at risk.
“Not yet,” Will said. “We haven’t been able to find him, and we have looked all over London.”
I inhaled and bit my lip before glancing at Ansel. “Have you been to your apartments at The Albany?”
Surprise flared in his eyes. “Is that where he’s been staying?
Then, yes, and he’s gone. The place was cleared out, spick-and-span.
If you hadn’t said anything, I wouldn’t have fathomed anyone had been there.
It’s empty of his belongings. There’s only an unfinished telescope there, tools, and some books. ”
“Those are mine,” I said, heart sinking. I missed the days when I could focus on my small dream to build a telescope while Tarik looked on.
Bloody hell.
How would we find him? London was a big place.
My despair must have shown on my face, because Blake stood up.
“We need to divide and conquer.” I shot him a grateful look, and his lips curled into a reassuring smile.
“It’s evening, and if he’s in town, my guess is he will be at a club somewhere.
He mentioned that he enjoys a hand of cards when things are strained.
I doubt he will be able to get into any of the member’s clubs like White’s or Boodle’s, but we should still check those anyway.
Ansel can take St. James’s Street and Pall Mall.
Will and Harold, you can go with him.” He paused.
“Ela and Zia can check with Ridley and Nasser to see if they know of any other places. Doppelg?ngers, you’re with me.
” Klaus and Kristof seemed ecstatic at the prospect.
“Roz, you can stay here, just in case a foxed lover boy shows up looking for you.”
“Why would he…?” I trailed off as the answer became obvious. When people were in their cups, they did unpredictable things. “Ela or Zia can stay here. I want to help. I can’t sit here and do nothing.”
“I’ll stay,” Ela volunteered, seeing my wild expression. “Zia will check in with Rafi and Keston.”
“Thank you,” I said with feeling. “Just give me a few minutes to change, and we can go.”
The twins sat opposite Blake and me in the coach. It was Blake’s carriage, since Ansel had taken ours. I could feel Blake’s stare fluttering over the side of my face with equal amounts of curiosity and reluctant admiration.
“Stop staring at me,” I hissed.
He chuckled and slapped his palm against his knee. “I wish I could. But with what you’re wearing, it’s astonishingly uncanny how much you look like Ansel. You pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes.”
“We are first cousins, Blake,” I said dryly. “The children of twins. It’s not a stretch of any capable imagination, even yours.”
“Why the change?” Kristof asked. “You don’t need to pretend you’re a boy anymore.”
“Highborn young ladies do not usually visit the West End, much less unmarried ones without a chaperone,” I said, even though I had been there before unchaperoned with Tarik.
Blake snorted. “I honestly cannot fathom that you existed like this for months, pretending to be Ansel. No wonder you two and everyone else were so convinced,” he said, jerking his chin to Klaus and Kristof, who couldn’t stop staring, though for different reasons.
They were used to this version of me. But I’d bet anything they were trying to reconcile the lady I was beneath the spectacles, top hat, and men’s clothing now that they knew the truth.
I hadn’t had time to fit the wig, so my hair was braided and tucked under a hat.
I’d forgone the mustache and had barely been able to glue on the false facial sideburns.
I thought that I would have been discomfited putting on the costume, but it had felt like slipping into a comfortable skin.
Not the elements of the disguise, but the person I embodied when camouflaged.
It was ludicrous how at ease I was…like this was the true version of me: the smart, scholarly bookworm who preferred to gorge on celestial mechanics and build an amateur telescope rather than wear fancy gowns and dance at a ball.
I didn’t want to be a boy. I enjoyed the freedom that came with pretending to be one, but I adored being authentically myself even more.
And this girl wore what she wanted, built what she wanted, and loved who she wanted.
For the first time in my life, I felt free…
and the one person with whom I wanted to share that pivotal truth loathed me.
“Where to first?” Klaus asked, making me jump. “We don’t know this area of London very well.”
“Good thing I do, lads. Watch and learn,” Blake said, leaning back and stretching his long arms.
I frowned at the way the twins were gawking at Blake as if he were some kind of idol and immediately shook my head. Nothing good could come of the three of them together, but right now, we needed to find Tarik.
“There’s a tavern near Seven Dials,” I said hesitantly. “Blue awning. We could check there.”
Blake shook his head. “I don’t even want to hear how you know about that place. It’s a hellhole. Why would he go there?”
“He told me about it once,” I fabricated. The chances that he would be there were low, considering the circumstances of how we’d been chased away last time, but I had to make sure, to cross it off the list.
When the carriage finally slowed in front of the familiar building, I bit my lip.
I was Lady Rosalin the last time I’d been here and would likely not be recognized in my guise as a young lord, but it would put a damper on things if I were.
Ansel and I did look uncannily alike, which could put this version of him in trouble if those men were still seeking their pound of flesh.
“Blake,” I said quietly, pulling his arm as he went to descend the carriage steps after the twins. “I can’t go in with you.”
He frowned. “Why?”
“I can’t tell you that,” I said.
“Can’t or won’t?”
I sighed. “Both, but suffice it to say that the female side of me might be persona non grata here.”
His eyes widened as my words registered. “Rosalin! Tell me you didn’t!”
“Fine, I’ll tell you I didn’t. Scold me later, please,” I said, shoving him out of the coach. “Check the gaming tables.”
“You are in a lot of trouble, young lady,” he said, and then grinned. “Only with me, though, because I would never break our sacred trust, but you must tell me everything or…I’ll spill all your sordid secrets like a cracked teapot.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re so dramatic. Go! And Blake?” He turned as I stuck my head out the coach door. “Do not corrupt the twins, or I swear I won’t forgive you.”
His lip curled into a smirk. “But just look at them, they’re adorable! And there’s two! Don’t be stingy.”
“No,” I said sternly. “Or the only tea spilling to everyone we know will be yours.”
“Spoilsport.” He pouted.
Blake and the twins disappeared into the tavern.
Settling back against the velvet seat, I waited and pondered on any other places that Tarik might visit, especially here in the West End.
Wasn’t there another gambling place that Blake had mentioned when he was talking about liking Tarik’s proposal? Danforth’s something or other.
My frown deepened as I realized I recognized the name from Zia, of all people, in passing.
The place was owned by the father of one of her classmates from her finishing school, Blythe Danforth.
Zia had laughingly told us a story of dressing up as a dandy once to infiltrate the place, where she’d almost been discovered by Rafi, who had been a member there.
Chances were that Ansel might be a member there as well, since all his mates were.
I knocked on the roof to the carriage. “Hobarth,” I called out in a deep voice. “Do you know where Danforth’s Den is?”
“Yes, sir. It’s at the end of Piccadilly. Not far, about half a mile.”
I thought about walking the ten or fifteen minutes, then reconsidered. I wasn’t armed, and dressed like this, I was asking for trouble from cutpurses. “Will you ferry me over there in a dash and return for Lord Blake and the boys?” I asked. “They might be awhile.”
“Of course, sir.”
Blake would be furious, considering I was alone, but Ansel always said it’s better to ask forgiveness than permission.
The ride to Danforth’s was quicker than I expected.
I hopped out of the carriage and walked confidently to the entrance, where a small crowd of people were waiting.
Mostly men, I noticed. I kept my head angled down and my lips flattened.
The burly man at the entrance eyed me up and down, clearly marking that I was a gentleman of means. “Member?”
My nerves shook. “Lord Ansel Chen,” I growled, hoping for a miracle that I wasn’t wrong.
The man consulted a leather-bound notebook, his brows pulling low. He flicked page after page, and for a moment, I was worried. But then the man grunted. “Right on through, my lord.”
Good God, that worked! I couldn’t believe my luck.
I stalked inside and promptly gaped at the extravagant décor.
My darling cousin was clearly a libertine to have a membership here—this place was equal parts bordello and gaming hell, all done up in deep lavish reds and stunning golds.
It was similar in feel to the gambling den in Cambridge, though on a much more sumptuous, opulent level.
Danforth’s clearly catered to a certain faction of the elite…
the part that had money and wanted to spend it on every vice life could offer.
There were women here, too. Though not in the capacity of members, as Tarik had envisioned.
Dressed in expensive wine-red gowns like a matching uniform of some sort, they had to be employed by the club.
A haze of green discolored my vision. What would be the odds of finding Tarik here drowning his sorrows and flirting with one of them?
Jealousy was not a pretty look on me, even dressed as a man.