Chapter 8
SEPTEMBER 10 – WEDNESDAY 10:38 PM
T heo
This was not on my bingo card for the year, but it gave my mind and hands something to do. Nash wanted to have his next trap set to go in a couple weeks, so I’d volunteered to fill the five-thousand mini-baggies with confectionary sugar. It also got me off Wayward property and away from the temptation of Liam. I turned the page in my molecular biology textbook and continued reading as I filled the next bag. The shit that I didn’t want to think about was trying really hard to take up space.
“I never thought I’d see this,” Liam drawled, like I’d summoned him.
The baggie that was still open when I jumped went flying and landed right on my textbook and notes. White powder spread everywhere.
“Fuck, do you ever walk like a normal person? Make some fucking noise, would you,” I growled, glaring at him.
He, annoyingly, didn’t look like he had a care in the world as he leaned against the door jamb.
“I’ve been here ten minutes watching you. I was tired of waiting for you to notice me,” Liam said and stepped into the room.
“Are you stalking me now,” I asked, and hated that the thought excited me.
“I will if you want me to,” he said, and the hair stood on the back of my neck.
I knew that tone all too well. Standing and walking around the table kept some distance between us without being too obvious. Not that there was anywhere to go in the basement.
“If you’re not stalking me, then why are you here? Did Nash send you?” Picking up my notepad, I blew it off and sent sugar into a small billowing cloud. “He’s crazy if he thinks I have all of these done already.”
“Nash didn’t send me. I wanted to speak to you alone.”
“So, you are stalking me.”
“Sort of, if you want to look at it that way. You’re the one who tripped the motion sensor when you came into the room.” He pointed to the hidden camera. “I was watching you, too. I do love it when you have that ultra-serious expression. I always know when you’re thinking too hard.”
“Stupid sensor.” Wiping off my textbook and closing it, I stuffed it and my notepad in my bag, all too aware of Liam inching closer. Zipping the bag, I sighed and crossed my arms, locking eyes with him. “You must want something if you followed me all the way out here, so what is it?”
“Like I said, I want to talk,” he said, sidestepping the table.
He moved like he was getting ready to pounce on me, managing to stir up all sorts of images of what we could be doing instead of fighting. If only it was that easy.
“Then stay where you are and talk,” I said.
“Why do you seem so nervous, Theo,” Liam asked, ignoring me and stepping closer.
“I’m not.”
“Yes, you are, and you’ve been a lot of things while we’ve been together but nervous isn’t one of them.”
“I’m not nervous, I’m frustrated. I came here for some time alone, and yet, here you are.”
“No, I don’t think that’s it.” He took another step forward, and I took one back. Liam had always been relentless, and he followed me until my back hit the wall. “What’s the real reason?”
“You’re so smart. You can figure it out.” I tried to walk around him, but he blocked my way. “Leave me alone, Liam.”
“No,” he said, pushing me back and trapping me against the wall in the cage of his arms.
“Get out of my face,” I snarled.
“No, I’m not going to do that. See, I think the reason you don’t want me in here is because you don’t trust yourself around me.” The decadent scent of the cologne I got him last Christmas filled my nose as my heart raced out of control. “I know you want me,” he growled.
“You’re right, I do.”
There was no point trying to hide it or pretend around Liam. Between his uncanny ability to read people and the fact that he knew me better than pretty much anyone, he would instantly sniff out the lie.
“I never said that I didn’t.” Dropping my bag, I grabbed his belt and pulled it free.
“What are you doing,” he asked, his face twisted in confusion. This wasn’t how our relationship worked. Liam gave the orders, and I obeyed.
Yanking open his button and zipper, his hard cock sprang free.
“What does it look like I’m doing?” I wrapped my hand around his shaft, and Liam’s body shuddered as I stroked him, teasing the tip with my thumb and his precum. “Isn’t this what you wanted?”
Before Liam could respond, I dropped to my knees and expertly slipped him into my mouth. I knew what he liked, how he liked it, and there was no holding back.
“Fuck, Theo.”
Liam’s voice was reduced to a raspy growl as he fisted my hair. I could picture his face twisted in pleasure, and as turned on as my body was, the same excitement that pleasing him used to bring me was blocked by the ache in my chest. The smoldering remains of what we had were still smoking, but the flame had been slowly suffocated. He’d been stomping on the fire long before I got back from Canada, and there was only so much anyone, including me, could handle before giving up.
My tongue teased all his sensitive spots as I cupped his balls and softly tugged and rolled them the way he’d made me practice until I could do it in my sleep. Up and down, my head bobbed. Faster and faster, my fingers tightened at the base of his balls like a cock ring. Almost instantly, they began to swell with his building need to come. Liam sucked in a ragged breath. His grip on my hair tightened, and I knew what was coming. Before he could force his cock down my throat, I swallowed the full length of him until my nose touched his six-pack.
“Fuck, that’s incredible.”
Relaxing my jaw, I let him take control and fuck my mouth as hard as he wanted. The deep groan and his body shuddering were a distinct giveaway that he was close. I released my hold on his balls, and he yelled while hammering into my throat.
“Yes. Fuck, so good,” Liam growled, stilling as he came.
His cock twitched with the last of his release, and he pulled out, unthreading his fingers from my hair. I sucked in a deep breath, wiped my mouth, and grabbed my bag. Liam staggered back a step, and I stood. This was when I’d normally be filled with pride. A thrill would ripple through my body, but instead, there was nothing but numbness. Liam’s eyes were glassy and cheeks a little flushed like he’d just taken a hit as he smirked at me.
Not saying a word, I hooked my bag on my shoulder and marched for the door.
“Hey, where are you going?”
Pausing, I turned back to face him. “I’m leaving.”
“But…I thought that….”
“What? You thought that I’d beg you to stay? Maybe take your hand and go upstairs so we could have another round in the bed or shower? Perhaps you pictured bending me over the couch,” I asked, stuffing my hands into my pockets.
“Um….”
I snorted, disgusted. “You got what you wanted. This is why you drove out here, is it not? Prove that I can’t say no to you and that I’ll cave and give you what you want. Put me back in my little Sub box and hope the lid stays on this time. Well, I caved. Congratulations. You win, I lose.”
“That’s not what….” He stopped and I could see him struggling for the right word.
“Liam, face it. The problem is that no matter what we do, it is always what you want.” I shook my head at him. “I can remember so clearly the day you told me that you wanted to be my Dom and that it was your duty to take care of me, that you’d always look out for me. I was so in love with you that I would’ve believed anything you said, and I did. What I think you forgot to mention was that all of that only applied if what I wanted aligned with what you wanted.”
“That’s not fair. We’ve had an incredible relationship until the last few months. There is only one thing that has changed, and that is Ren.”
“Don’t do that!” I balled my fists. “This is not about Ren. You keep missing the point, and you’re not stupid, so I can only assume you’re choosing to act like you don’t get it.”
Liam crossed his arms, his jaw twitching as he clenched it tight.
“This is about how you don’t respect me and how you’re embarrassed of me. You couldn’t run away fast enough yesterday in the shower the second you heard the football team come in.” Rage filled my chest, and yet it was as if ice had been injected into my veins. “And that was after you cringed when I kissed you on the bench and claimed that it was just because I took you by surprise.” I shook my head at him. “Don’t do that. Don’t fucking lie to me. I deserve better. The only thing you’re right about is that Ren ripped away what was making me blind. And if you still don’t believe me…well, I can’t say it more plainly than I already have.”
“I came out here to tell you that I’m sorry about yesterday.”
“Sorry? Do you really believe your hollow words to placate me are what I’m after? That has been your takeaway from everything that’s happened between us the last few months?”
I’d fallen into the oldest relationship trap of thinking that I could change him, that I would be enough, or the one to make the difference. That hadn’t been the case. If anything, he’d become more secretive, more degrading, and emotionally manipulated me into a box that I refused to return to, ever.
“No, I….” He ran his hand through his hair, and as enjoyable as it was to see Liam at a loss for words, which was rare, it also hurt.
We stared at one another, the seconds ticking by in a deafening silence. It was tearing me apart. Sucking in a deep breath, my hand tightened on the strap of my backpack.
“Liam, the fact that you can no longer read me…let’s just say that says more about you as a Dom than it does me as your Sub.” I’d hit a nerve as his eyes filled with anger, but he didn’t say anything to dispute me. “You know that I love you, but this isn’t going to work anymore. I think we should take a break.”
He stepped back, his eyes hardening.
“You’re breaking up with me?” Shock was written all over his normally unreadable face.
“We both saw this coming, but neither of us wanted to be the one to do it. I’ll take the hit.”
Turning, I marched out, but every limb shook, the pain and pent-up emotion creating a black hole where my heart had been.
“Theo, don’t be like this. You know I love you. Why can’t that be enough,” Liam yelled after me but didn’t chase me down or grab me.
A tear ran down my cheek, and I swiped it away, just like Liam had been doing to me since our very first date. Memories, good and bad, flooded my mind with each step I took away from the toxicity of our past and toward the future I wanted.
“I will always love you…no matter what,” I whispered, getting into my car before completely falling apart.
SEPTEMBER 11 – THURSDAY 12:25 AM
Ren
It was late, and I really should be asleep but studying yesterday had been near impossible. Myles and Blake just couldn’t be in the same room to study. No…scrap that. They could be in the same room, just not with me. We ended up doing everything except what we were supposed to be doing. Who knew that being tied up could be so much fun?
Sighing, I continued to fill out the assignment from Mr. Sharpe. It wasn’t due until next week, but if I had any chance of beating Theo this year for that top spot, I couldn’t start off slacking.
Thinking of Theo made me run through the conversation with Liam again. I hadn’t told anyone about it, and Myles and Blake easily believed that my swollen knuckle was from hitting the bag wrong during training. Divulging what we’d yelled at one another or what he had said in the kitchen wouldn’t bring us together, but his words had been on a loop in my mind ever since.
A soft knock broke through my absentminded thoughts. Ivy was sound asleep when I glanced over before answering the door. Theo stood there, his red, swollen eyes locked with mine, looking like an apparition haunting the hallway.
“What’s wrong?”
He just shook his head, and once more, my heart got a workout as it began to pound hard in my chest.
“Is someone injured or dead?”
He shook his head again and closed his eyes. A tear slid down his cheek, and the fear in my chest ignited into a burning rage. What had Liam done now? Making sure the hall was clear, I took his hand, tugged him into the room, and closed the door.
Theo took off his shoes and sat on my bed as I saved my assignment and closed my laptop. It was crushing me that he still hadn’t spoken. He looked like someone had died, and that could only mean one thing if no one was injured—he and Liam had another fight, and this one ended badly.
Flicking off the light, I didn’t care if I got into trouble for him spending the night. There was no way in hell I was leaving him alone in this state. I’d never seen him so withdrawn or emotional. This wasn’t the same guy who ordered me to get on his motorcycle and challenged me to be better at every opportunity.
“Get under the blankets,” I whispered.
To further my worry, he obeyed. No smart-ass remarks or sarcastic comeback. He didn’t even mention the incorrect powering down of my computer. Snuggling in beside him, I wrapped my arms around his waist and laid my head on his shoulder. It was only then that I realized that he was shaking.
“Do you want to talk about it,” I asked, even though I knew he wouldn’t.
“No.”
“Is this about Liam?” He nodded, holding me tighter. “Do I need to cut his balls off? Because I’ll do it. I’ll do it with a spoon ‘cause it’ll hurt more.”
Theo chuckled, but even that sounded sad. “I wish it were that simple,” he said, the pain straining his voice, breaking my heart.
“Is there anything I can do?”
“No, the ball is in his court now,” he whispered and kissed the top of my head.
Theo didn’t speak again, and it was driving me insane. What the fuck had Liam done? He was too fucking stubborn for his own good. Theo would cut off a limb for him, and he couldn’t even show a little respect or at least explain himself.
I laid awake long after Theo had fallen asleep, more determined than ever to find a way to force the two of them to see that they were meant to be together. Liam just needed to get out of his own way.
As I watched the clock click over to six, I left Theo’s arms and got ready for class. Theo’s sleeping face was too much to resist and I reached out to run my finger down his cheek. He was relaxed, and the pain had vanished as he slept, but I knew the moment he woke up, it would be back.
“It’s going to be okay. I promise I’ll find a way to make this right,” I whispered in Theo’s ear before leaving to get showered.