Chapter 10
SEPTEMBER 11 – THURSDAY 7:45 AM
L iam
“What the fuck?”
I blinked, my head throbbing, and was just able to make out Nash in the doorway.
“What the hell happened in here? What the fuck happened to you?”
Licking my lips, I sucked in a gasp as it felt like a spike was being drilled into my brain. Not giving a shit about Nash and his stupid rules, I swiped the pack of smokes off the floor and put one between my lips.
Cold metal touched my forehead, and as much as it hurt, I looked up at him. The barrel of the gun was pressed against my head.
“Go ahead, do it. I’ll pull the fucking trigger.”
“Then kill me,” I said, really not giving a fuck if he did.
Lighting up, I sucked in a breath and sat back on the couch, blowing the smoke in the air. Leaning over the arm of the couch, I spotted my bottle of whiskey and reached for it. Nash kicked it like he was trying out for FIFA. The bottle sailed through the air and smashed into the wall behind me.
“Asshole.”
“Have you looked around? It’s like a fucking bomb went off,” he growled. “What the hell happened?” He wiped his hand along the couch, collected the white powder, and held it up for me to see.
I glanced around, remembering all too well why there were man-sized holes in the walls.
“I used the table to redecorate,” I said sarcastically, staring at said coffee table hanging halfway out of the small storage room door. Not a single thing in the room had been safe. If it was liftable then it was throwable. “Just be happy that I didn’t decide the entire cabin needed a makeover.” Smirking, I took another drag of my cigarette.
He flopped down on the couch beside me and shook his head.
“What happened?”
“You don’t want to hear my sob story.” He turned his head and glared at me. “Fuck. Fine.” Crushing the butt out on the bottom of my boot, I leaned back again and stared at the ceiling. “Theo ended us.”
Saying those words out loud was another thousand slashes to my heart. My eyes stung, and I draped my arm over my face to keep Nash from seeing me cry. I didn’t cry. Theo had made me fucking cry. Fucker.
“Why?”
“Why do you think?”
“Well, I know what I think, but what do you think is the reason?”
“Oh no, don’t go all Yoda on me,” I growled. “That’s my job, and my head hurts way too much for that shit.”
“You look more like Jabba the Hutt at the moment.” I glared at Nash even though he was probably right. “Do you want some water,” he asked.
“Yeah.”
“Come on.”
The couch moved beside me. Opening my eyes, Nash had his hand stretched out in front of my face. I was tempted to swipe it away, but there was no way I was staying upright without help.
Clasping hands with Nash, he pulled me to my feet and put my arm around his neck.
“I’m sorry about the room.”
“Don’t be. I’m going to take the cost to fix it out of your salary, and I’ll make sure to add all the upgrades I’d been too cheap to do myself,” he said.
I snorted and then groaned as my head and stomach turned on me at the same time. Nash unceremoniously dumped me in the bathroom to throw up and shower. Every part of my body hurt. I hadn’t even felt like this after my last twenty-four-hour race.
Theo’s words looped around and around like a dark carousel of pain. Pulling myself up off the floor, I stepped into the shower. As the hot water hit my back, it was all I could do to keep the lethal combination of rage and misery under control.
Only the knock on the door broke the loop.
“Hurry up,” Nash barked.
Getting dressed was slow and arduous, but I finally managed to get my jeans zipped and hoodie on before walking out to find Nash. He was in the kitchen, and my stomach was undecided if it liked the smell of fried eggs and sausage. He made a couple of breakfast sandwiches and handed them over to me with a bottle of water before making his own. I took a bite as he licked his fingers and waved me to follow him. He pulled my cigarettes out of his pocket.
“What the fuck are you doing,” I asked as he twisted them into dust over the toilet bowl.
“You told me that you quit.”
“Fuck off. I slipped, so what?”
Nash flushed the toilet and dropped the empty pack into the garbage.
“You think I don’t know that you never stopped?” I crossed my arms.
“Whatever,” I drawled and then swore as Nash grabbed me and pushed me up against the wall.
“You want to fuck up your lungs, that’s your choice, but you will not do it until swimming is over. Yes, I’m making this about me. Don’t fuck this up for me, Liam. It’s the only good thing in my life.”
Words had never hit so hard. The only good thing in my life had walked out on me last night.
“Yeah, okay,” I said, and Nash let me go.
“Come on. You can tell me what happened in the car. We need to get to school. I had first period free, but I’m really looking forward to Russian this morning.” The way he said it left no doubt in my mind that he had something up his sleeve. “Besides, I don’t need a date with Dean Henry this early into the year. We’re almost free.”
“How did you know I was at the cabin?”
“I didn’t, but I checked the camera this morning, and it was pointed at the floor. Decided to check out what the fuck was going on.”
“On your own?” He shrugged. “If I have to stop smoking, you need to stop taking stupid risks. What if you arrived and there was a rival gang tearing the place up, or cops found it and had a search warrant to arrest you? Or what if a bear was in the cabin, and you walked in on it ripping shit apart?”
“Fine…I’ll be more careful. Now fucking tell me what happened,” he ordered.
By the time we reached Wayward, my grease-laden food and the water were gone. Nash got an overview of what went down between me and Theo and what he had said to me. Nash didn’t say anything, but he didn’t need to. I could see it in his eyes. I’d fucked up. The problem was…I didn’t know how to fix it. I had to relook at every moment we’d shared and analyze it from a whole new lens, and what I saw…wasn’t good. I’d been a piece of shit to my Sub but worse to the one person I swore I’d never hurt…the person I love.
Fuck.
SEPTEMBER 11 – THURSDAY 11:16 AM
Nash
Focusing on Russian was hard enough, but the empty seat beside me that Ren usually occupied made it nearly impossible. There were very few things that I could count on as regularly as the sun rising, insurance companies fucking people over, and my father being a dick, but one was Ren going to class. Where the hell was she?
I’d hoped she would be in here stomping her foot and glaring at me with that cute as fuck snarl that always got me hot. While she swore she was going to kill me, I would picture yanking her over my lap and tanning her ass. My well thought out plan was foiled, and it was either because she knew that was what I wanted and was purposely staying away, or something bad had happened.
Raising my hand, Mr. Romanovich stopped talking and looked over the rim of his glasses at me.
“Yes, Mr. Collier?”
God, I hated that everyone called me that. It might be my name, but it just reminded me that no matter how far I ran or how much I fought against it, I’d always be my father’s son.
“I’m not feeling well and need to go to the clinic,” I said. His bushy eyebrows shot up, and annoyance washed over me. “What’s my average from last year? Ninety-two percent?” I closed my laptop and stuffed all my shit into my bag. “If you have a problem with it, take it up with the Dean,” I said before he could say anything else.
My footfalls echoed in the quiet hallway as I marched away from class. Bowfield Hall was my least favorite of the buildings. There was just something about it that I didn’t like.
My stride faltered as I pushed outside and saw Ren walking toward me.
“What the fuck happened?” An unexpected burst of rage ripped through my body at the sight of her face. Her eyes were nearly swollen closed, her cheeks were black and blue, and she had a brace on her nose.
“Ask your delightful ex,” Ren said, trying to walk around me, but I snagged her waist and hauled her back. “Nash, I am so not in the mood.”
My eyes traced her face, taking in every mark and committing it to memory. I’d seen battered faces before. Hell, I’d seen mine look like this after a round with my father, but there was something about seeing her like this….
“What? No sarcastic comment about how I had this coming,” she said, crossing her arms, and that was when I noticed her hand was also bandaged.
“No.” My voice was soft, and the defensive look in her eyes began to fade. “Tell me what happened, Princess.”
“We were in gym, and Vicky purposely spiked the ball at my face. I’ll give it to her. She has a hell of a swing. It broke my nose, but I’ll live.”
Fucking bitch. Mr. Genovese was the only reason I didn’t kill Vicky with my bare hands.
“And your hand?”
Ren looked down at the bandage and shrugged.
“Oh. I punched Liam in the face yesterday morning. He was being a dick and totally deserved it.”
My lip twitched up into a lopsided grin. That was my Princess. Feisty as fuck and willing to throw down with anyone.
“Why are you staring at me like that?”
“Just realizing that everyone at the athlete’s dinner will think I beat the shit out of you.”
She closed her eyes and groaned. “Shit…I really will look hideous. Great.”
“No, that could never happen.” I cleared my throat. “You should be healed by then. It will be fine.”
The stupid words tumbled out before my brain could catch up and shut my mouth. Ren looked down and nibbled her bottom lip. The memory of how those lips tasted and felt had been plaguing my dreams, taunting me to take more.
“Don’t think that sweet talk will make me forget the little gift you left for me yesterday. Like seriously…yuck. I can’t believe you did that.”
I smiled wide. Cue the fantasies.
“Come on. There’s no point in you going to class now, and I guess I owe you some ice cream or something.”
“Ice cream? You think ice cream will make me forgive you?”
“I can give you another type of cream again if you prefer?” She glared and then winced. “I’m joking…sort of. What do you have to lose? You can’t type, and Rambling Romanovich is recapping last year anyway. Nothing exciting ever happens the first class back.”
“I’m going to regret this, aren’t I?”
“No, never.” I shot her a teasing look. She glanced at me as we started walking toward the main hall.
“Did you really come on my picture?” Smiling wide, I shrugged and let her draw her own conclusion. “You need therapy.”
Poking her was way more fun than it should be.
“With my parents, that’s a given. But you’ll never see me in one of those rooms, spilling my guts to some stranger,” I said.
“Why? Are you afraid they might never be able to fix whatever the fuck is wrong with you?”
Chuckling, I shook my head.
“Naw, I already know they can’t fix me. You just never give anyone that much information about yourself. Every word is a potential bullet that can end your life.”
“We really need to work on your trust issues,” Ren said as I pulled open the foyer door.
Everyone stared at us, or more specifically Ren, as we walked by. She never glanced at them, and it was becoming clear what intrigued me so much about her. No matter what happened, how hard she was hit, mentally, physically, or emotionally, she always got back up, dusted herself off, and kept going. I felt a kinship with that part of her personality. Not many could handle what she had the way she did.
We walked into the cafeteria, and Liam looked up. He did a double-take before standing and walking over.
“What the fuck? Did you decide to box someone without taking my lessons first?”
Ren glared at him. “No, this was care of Vicky. You are so lucky that I already feel like I’ve been trampled by a charging moose. Otherwise, I’d kick your ass for whatever the fuck you did to Theo last night.” Liam’s face blanched.
“What did he say?”
“Nothing, not a single word. He looked like you ripped his heart right out of his chest, and so help me God, Liam, if you do not make this right between the two of you….” She held up her hand as she reigned in her rant. “You don’t deserve him. Think about that and how lonely and empty your life would be without him because no one, and I mean no one, will ever love you like Theo does.”
“Are you done sharing my dirty laundry with the school,” Liam asked, looking around.
“Dirty? Dirty? Wrong choice of word there, Bud. Don’t push me. I’ll get on the fucking PA and announce exactly what I think of you and your treatment of him to everyone.”
Liam swallowed hard. I was loving every second of this and couldn’t keep the smirk off my face.
“I need to fix this,” he whispered.
“You’re damn right you do. This is the last thing I’m going to say on this. Theo told me that he thinks you’re embarrassed to be seen with him—to acknowledge what you two have publicly. I don’t know why, and you don’t have to tell me, but unless the answer is that you’d be shot in the head, there is no excuse. Have you looked at him? I mean, really took a step back and looked?”
Ren cocked her hip, and her skirt shifted, showing off the shape of her ass. I put my hands in my pocket to keep from doing something stupid.
“Yeah, of course I have.”
“Really? Well then, you’re a bigger idiot than I thought.”
It was so rare to see Liam flustered that I was going to soak in every second of this. She held up her finger as she counted off.
“He’s the smartest guy in school, don’t tell him I said that. He’s smoking hot.”
I ground my teeth together as a seed of jealousy began to sprout. Not that I could do anything. My deal with Mr. Genovese handcuffed me.
“He rides a motorcycle. I mean that alone…and then on top of it all, he would die to protect you. So the next time you want to be an asshole to him, why don’t you try thinking about how lucky you are first?”
“He broke up with me,” Liam said so quietly that I almost didn’t hear it. “So there won’t be a next time. He doesn’t want anything to do with me.”
Ren threw her hands in the air.
“How is it that you can be so smart and stupid at the same time? If you really believe it’s over, then fine. But from where I’m sitting, he wants you to man up, get off your hands, and prove what you keep giving as lip service.”
“When did you get so fucking mouthy,” Liam asked, and I laughed.
“Trust me she came this way,” I drawled, earning a lifted eyebrow from Ren.
“Fine, you’re so smart. What should I do,” Liam asked.
Ren shrugged.
“Think outside the box and push all your chips into the center of the table or lose forever. Now, I need more painkillers and a coffee. My fucking head is pounding,” Ren said and walked away, dismissing us both.
She was growing into her last name. I hadn’t met a Mikhailov yet who wouldn’t rip your balls off and force you to eat them.
“Coffee?” Liam nodded toward Ren at the barista bar.
“You know…why the hell not.”
It wasn’t like I could fuck up any more than I already had.