Chapter Thirty-Five
Damon
There’s an eerie quiet in the office when I arrive this morning.
Mel is at her desk working hard as usual, but she doesn’t give me her customary cheery greeting.
Just a small smile and a slight wave. Matilda the Hun is also absent from her desk, but I certainly don’t miss her snarky morning retorts.
Joslyn’s and Jacob’s offices are dark, so it looks like they aren’t in, either.
Joslyn hasn’t texted me since I left her place yesterday morning, and I’ve sent her several texts.
I assumed that she was having a really busy day, but something isn’t right.
I can feel it. I have a new coach interview in fifteen minutes, and I need to prep, but as soon as that’s done, I’m going to find out what the hell is going on.
Mel’s already done my interview prep. She’s the best. It’s behind my daily schedule, and a list of questions is attached as well.
Despite that, everything feels off-kilter today.
I have no idea if anyone else is showing up for this interview other than me and Sean Quinn, the current head coach at Boston University.
I still haven’t heard about the interview Joslyn did yesterday.
I jot down a note to remind myself to ask her about it.
God knows, when she’s around, work is the last thing on my mind.
The interview situation is nerve-wracking because all three of us had planned to be present. Now Joslyn and Jacob are MIA, and I have no idea what to expect. Okay, maybe I’m panicking a bit. It’s not like I haven’t interviewed coaches before. I can do this.
There’s a knock on my open door. I glance up to see Mel wearing a compassionate but contrite smile.
“Did you see the questions for your interview? Jacob sent them over. He’s sorry he can’t be here, but he has every faith in you to handle this.
” Her confident voice soothes my nerves and pulls me back from the edge of panic.
“Also, I don’t think that Joslyn’s going to be in after yesterday’s disaster, but I’m sure you already knew that. How is she?”
That feeling of dread I’ve had all morning coils tightly in the pit of my stomach.
“What disaster?” I practically growl at her.
She starts, eyes wide with alarm, before they slide to the side, and she’s unable to meet my gaze.
“I haven’t talked to her since yesterday morning. Mel? Talk to me.”
She shies away and starts to back out the door. I don’t want her to think I’m angry at her, so I resort to the only reasonable alternative. I beg.
“Mel, please?” I entreat shamelessly, I need to know what the fuck is going on. At this point, I’ll abandon my pride for information.
She finally looks up, uncertainty written on her face.
“At least tell me she’s okay. I’m dying here.” My plea seems to give her the push she needs, and she steels her spine.
“Yes, she’s perfectly fine, physically.” She’s still hesitating, so I prompt her. Hunching her shoulders, she won’t look me in the eye.
My anxiety about the situation keeps escalating.
“But...”
“Look, your interview’s in five minutes. I promise to tell you, but it’s a long story. Just get through the interview, and then we can talk. I promise she’s perfectly fine.” She gives me a pleading look, and I grit my teeth.
“Fine, but I need you to promise you’ll tell me everything after this call,” I grind out, my voice laden with frustration.
“I swear!” She places her hand over her heart, her expression earnest. Oh, hell! I know Mel always keeps her word, but damn, this is exasperating. She’s not wrong, and I’m the only one here today to hold down the fort. I don’t like it, but I acquiesce.
“Let’s get this over with,” I grumble, trying to let go of my irritation.
We are desperate for a new coach, and if this guy doesn’t work out, we’ll be back to square one.
That’s the last thing we need. We’re too close to the start of the season as it is.
Besides, the best thing I can do for the team right now is to not fuck this up, so I put on my game face and go to it.
An hour and a half later, I’m feeling much more confident about the upcoming season.
Sean Quinn is the perfect fit for the team we’re creating.
He’s very much aligned with our vision, and he knows this will be an uphill battle, especially at first. It’s going to cost us some serious cash and a couple of concessions to get it done, but I know Jacob and Joslyn well enough now to feel comfortable giving him a tentative commitment.
Keeping myself focused on the interview was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
My gut is churning with apprehension. Why didn’t she call me last night?
Why am I the last to know what happened?
I’m trying not to be upset that I’m not the first person she called, but it’s killing me.
As soon as our online meeting is complete, I’m on my feet and out the door to find Mel.
I’m speechless by the time she finishes walking me through the events of yesterday.
What a fucking mess. I don’t even know where to start with my questions.
And let’s not even talk about all the feelings that I’m having right now.
If Bill weren’t in jail already, he would be answering to me.
The thing that I keep coming back to, though, is that Joslyn told Mel not to call me.
I know it was because of Lexi, but I can’t seem to get past it.
I thought we were building something. I thought we had each other’s backs.
Now I’m rethinking everything because something huge happened in her life, and she didn’t want me to know about it.
Why? I know I shouldn’t, but it’s hard not to take this personally.
I know she’s carrying a lot of baggage, but maybe there’s more to it than that.
What if it’s me? What if I’ve made this into something it’s not?
I trudge back to my office, the weight of it pressing down on me.
I’m trying hard to work through it all, but the truth is that I’m hurt.
Then, it hits me like a ton of bricks. I’m completely and utterly in love with Joslyn Robertson.
All in. And she doesn’t feel the same way at all.
I honestly don’t know what to do with that information.
“Go talk to her, Damon,” Mel says softly, patting my arm in sympathy. “I can see that you’re up in your head with all your feelings right now, but before you do anything rash, I think you should go talk to her.”
I drop my head into my hands, hiding my wounded expression. I give myself a few minutes to rally, because this is hitting me hard.
“Yeah, talking would be good.” My voice is hoarse from everything I’m holding in.
Back in my office, I grab my keys without conscious thought, then I swing by Mel’s desk again on my way out of the office.
“Can you just reschedule anything else I have going on today?”
“Already done. There wasn’t much going on anyway. Jonesy’s back, so he can help me if anything comes up.” She gives me an optimistic smile and a final pat on the back before wishing me good luck.
Yeah, I’m going to need it.