Reckless: Collision (Sugar & Spice #1)

Prologue

Jinx

There’s a freedom in taunting the call of the void. You know that little voice that whispers in the back of your head to jump.

To free fall.

To just fucking do it.

Do it. Do it. Do it.

The mantra pulses with my heartbeat as I spread my arms wide. Wind whips through my hair, each gust like icy fingers counting the seconds until I break. One. Two. Three. Four.

I close my eyes, just feeling it. The wind, the freedom, the call.

It whispers to me in the recesses of my mind, a siren song of oblivion. Sweet. Seductive. Mine.

Jump.

Adrenaline surges through me, a chemical cocktail that sets every nerve ending on fire. The warning in my stomach mutates into something darker—butterflies with razor wings, shredding me from the inside out. Their sharp edges match the fragments of my mind—jagged pieces that never quite fit back together.

Beneath it all, a deeper, darker urge stirs. The Alpha in me, caged and rabid, howling for release. Begging to hunt. To claim. To destroy.

My eyes snap open to the city beneath me.

Puritan City. A fucking cesspool I’m supposed to protect.

The streets stretch out like veins, pulsing with life I should guard but want to tear apart. Each heartbeat below calls to the predator inside me. Prey, all of them. Waiting for someone strong enough to make them bleed.

Ant-like figures scurry about, oblivious to the broken Alpha teetering on the edge above them. They don’t know how close they are to death. How thin the line is between safety and chaos. Between control and... me.

For a brief, sinister moment, I wonder what would happen if I just let go. Let the beast inside me break free, one last time.

I’d rain down on them like the wrath of a fallen god.

Shatter into a thousand jagged pieces of Jinx, spreading chaos and destruction in my wake.

Alpha fury unleashed, a final blaze of glory.

A laugh escapes my lips, harsh and feral, more snarl than anything human. The sound echoes in my head, a chorus of broken pieces all laughing together.

I could do it.

I lick my lips, tasting salt and copper, and grip the edge of the roof. The rough concrete bites into my palms, an anchor to reality. I want to jump. Need to jump.

End it. Right here, right now.

Just feel the end.

But I don’t.

I won’t.

Not yet at least.

Soon , the darkness whispers. Soon .

With a deep breath that burns my lungs like wildfire, I push the call of the void deep into the dark recesses of my mind. Those sinister places I keep locked up tight, a Pandora’s box of fucked-up thoughts and feral instincts.

The ones that if I released to the world, Puritan City Alpha Security would do more than put me on extended leave. They’d put me down like the rabid dog I am.

And I’d deserve it.

I step back from the edge, my heart still racing, a jackhammer trying to burst through my rib cage. Each beat counts down to something inevitable. Something hungry.

The adrenaline slowly ebbs away, leaving me hollow and drained, a discarded husk on the rooftop. I sink to the ground, my back against the low wall. The rough stone scrapes against my skin through the thin fabric of my shirt, grounding me in sensation.

Reality or madness. Reality or madness. The line blurs more every day.

I fumble for the flask in my jacket, hands shaking like a junkie in withdrawal. The whiskey burns a familiar path down my throat, a river of fire cutting through the fog of my mind.

I close my eyes, willing the thoughts away, trying to exile them to the darkest corners of my psyche.

Not today. Not here.

I have a pack to think about, a job to get back to. Or some bullshit like that. The words taste like ash in my mouth.

Responsibilities I’m not sure I can handle anymore.

Most days I’m just waiting for the perfect time.

When no one is looking.

When no one sees what a broken Alpha I’ve become.

And then...

The roof access door bangs open, making me flinch. The scent hits me before I see them—my pack. Concern, frustration, and love, all mingled together in a cocktail that makes my chest ache.

“Jinx,” Ryker says, his voice a low rumble. Our pack leader, always trying to hold us together.

Some things aren’t meant to stay whole.

Finn’s there too, all charm and forced smiles, trying to lighten the mood. “You can’t keep disappearing on us like this. Who’s gonna keep Theo in line?”

I hear Theo’s indignant “Hey!” and Finn’s soft chuckle.

They’re all here, my fucked-up little family. My anchors. My chains.

I grunt, hauling myself to my feet. They form a loose circle around me, not crowding but close enough that I can feel their presence.

Their strength. Their worry.

It makes my fucking teeth ache.

“I’m fine,” I growl, the words hollow even to my own ears. “Just needed some air.”

None of them believe me. I can see it in their eyes, smell it in their scents. But they don’t push. They never do, not anymore. Not since I snapped on that last job, the one that earned me this vacation and the pitying looks from my fellow officers.

Ryker steps forward, his hand on my shoulder. “Come on,” he says. “Let’s go home.”

Home. As if I deserve one after what I’ve done.

But I nod, let them lead me away from the edge. Away from the temptation to end it all in a blaze of Alpha fury.

One foot in front of the other.

That’s all I have to do.

Keep moving forward.

Into the unknown.

Into danger.

Into the next chapter of my fucked-up life.

As we descend in the elevator, cramped together in a box of steel and unspoken tensions, I can’t help but wonder.

How long can I keep this up?

How long before I shatter completely, taking my pack down with me?

How long before Puritan City Alpha Security realizes they’ve got a ticking time bomb on their hands?

The elevator dings, doors sliding open to reveal the grimy streets of the city I’m sworn to protect. A city that doesn’t know how close it came to witnessing the meltdown of a lifetime.

Time to see if I’ll survive another day of playing at normalcy, or if I’ve just found a more interesting way to destroy myself.

Either way, it’s gonna be one hell of a ride.

And may whatever gods are left have mercy on anyone who crosses my path when I finally snap for good.

Because I will.

All in time.

Tick. Tick. Tick.