Chapter Five #2
He drew a breath. “She used to be happy,” he said after a moment. “Vibrant. She and Matt…they were good together. Real good.”
He swallowed the guilt swelling in his throat. “They were happy.”
And if he’d done something—anything—different, Matt would be here today.
The weight pressed in on his lungs.
“She’s doing the best she can, considering. But she’s a shadow of who she used to be.” He clenched his jaw, then the real concern rolled out. “She ordered some cameras.”
Crew arched a brow. “Cameras?”
“Security cameras and other equipment. She didn’t explain why she needed them, but my guess is she didn’t feel safe in some of these places she’s been staying.”
Gabe issued a noise in his chest. “Think it’s because Matt’s gone that she doesn’t feel safe? She does look tired, like she isn’t sleeping.”
“She slept last night,” he blurted out. “Or at least I think she did. The door was closed.”
They all took that in.
He reached into his back pocket and drew out his phone. He pulled up the collection of photos of his time in the military. He didn’t look at them often—he didn’t need to. The images were imprinted on his mind. But he glanced at them as he passed his phone across the table.
Crew picked it up. When he began to thumb through the library, he let out a low breath. “I see what you mean. She looks like grief has changed her.” He passed the phone to Gabe.
After a quick look, Gabe sighed and pushed the device to Theo.
Church knew they were seeing a group of them on a sand volleyball court near the base. Zee stood in the middle of the team, laughing, her arms thrown around two other players.
The device made its way back to him, and he held it up. “This is the Zee I knew. Laughing. Having fun. Losing her husband took its toll…but I can’t help but think there’s more.”
Until he spoke the words, he hadn’t let them completely gel in his head. Now they rang true.
“She’s lost weight. Looks tired.” Theo met Church’s gaze. “She’s in the right place now. This place is therapy. It was therapy for me and my siblings growing up with our bastard of a father. It’s been a refuge for so many since.”
His throat tightened as he realized he was one of the many. Now so was Zee.
He nodded and glanced at the time on his phone before standing and slipping it into his pocket. “We have to be on set in thirty minutes.”
Gabe pushed to his feet too. “If you need anything from us—”
For a moment, that tightness in his throat felt like a brick. He managed a nod. What he felt right now in this room wasn’t just a group of coworkers at a military training facility.
These guys had his six the way his SEAL team had.
And that made his throat tight all over again.
Church nodded once, hoping the gesture carried more feeling than words would’ve managed. Theo held his gaze for a second longer before giving a small nod back.
Church turned toward the door, the knot in his throat easing enough to let him breathe again. The crisp fall day was already underway with the sounds of the ranch, and he lengthened his strides to reach the lodge where Zee was waiting for him.
Protecting people had always come naturally to him. It was the job he’d built his life around. He might only be guarding a movie star on a film set, but he was watching the perimeter. Reading the terrain. Making sure people were safe.
Now he was watching over Zee too.
And he wasn’t going to fail her again.
* * * * *
Zee didn’t know how it happened. One minute she was sitting there, crushing crumbs of her breakfast with her fork. The next, a toddler was sitting in her lap and the little girl’s mother was introducing herself.
“It looks like you’re Navy’s next victim.” The woman, sensationally pretty and radiating happiness, took the chair that Church had abandoned.
Zee looked down at the little girl sporting two tiny pigtails and the biggest gray eyes she’d ever seen. “Um…hi, Navy.”
The child reached for Zee’s untouched muffin on her plate.
“I’m Rhae Malone. Denver’s wife. You’re Zee?”
Surprised, she nodded.
“And Navy likes to beg for food off everyone’s plate like a puppy. She loves the muffins.”
“She’s welcome to it. If that’s all right with you.” She smiled at Rhae.
Rhae reached for the muffin. “May I?”
Zee pushed the plate her direction, and Rhae broke a small piece off the muffin. Navy closed her fingers gently around the confection, making it apparent she’d devoured enough of them to know that squeezing hard would crush it.
She shoved the entire thing in her mouth, eyes lighting as she chewed the bite.
Zee laughed at the sight of the girl’s cheeks stuffed like a chipmunk’s. “She’s beautiful.” Her heart flexed as she remembered the times she and Matt talked about kids. And though she’d worked through all these things over the course of three years, suddenly, it all felt fresh again.
“Hey.” Rhae’s murmur made her look up, and she realized her eyes were blurred with tears.
She held them at bay. “Sorry. It’s just that…”
“You can talk to me freely if you’d like. I’m a therapist here in the program.”
Even if she hadn’t told her, Zee felt pulled to this woman as if they’d been friends forever.
She told her she was working at the training facility, and also with Church on a job for the security team. Then she shared a little about Matt.
Rhae’s eyes glittered with her own trace of tears. “Sorry. It’s just…I understand more than you can believe. I was with Denver before I came here. He was ghost ops. So deep that he was dead to the world. Even his family.”
Zee was in awe of this woman’s strength.
“I got pregnant but I knew he couldn’t be with me. I came here with Navy to raise her around his family. Then he returned, and well…” She cradled the small bump of her stomach and a second child growing there.
Zee smiled through her tears. “I’m so happy for your family. It brings me…hope that I can be happy too.”
Navy wiggled in her lap, and she set the child on her feet. She took off running across the room, arms wide and pigtails bouncing. “Pope! Pope! Uppie!”
A man swooped her up and cradled her in his arm.
Rhae watched with a soft smile. “That’s Vander Pope. A resident in the program. And one of Navy’s favorites because he takes her to see the horses.”
Pope approached Rhae. “Looks like she found me. Mind if I take her outside?”
“Not at all. I’m going to give Zee a little tour of the ranch.” She turned to look at Zee. “If you’re up for it?”
Zee nodded. “I don’t have very much time before Church and I have to go to the movie set.”
Rhae nodded. “I promise to get you back in time.”
She looked at Pope. “I’ll swing by the paddock and get Navy. Listen to Pope, Navy.”
“Neigh neighs!” She let out a loud, very realistic horse sound and they all laughed, including the men around them.
Rhae led her out of the lodge. As they wandered the grounds, Zee relaxed in a way that she couldn’t when she was on the set. This place…
For the first time in a long time, she felt alive.
They entered a small, enclosed garden. A couple guys were weeding a patch of vegetables in the early morning sun, grains of dirt clinging to their bare forearms.
“This is the community garden. You know Gabe from the training facility?”
She nodded.
“Fern is his significant other and she created the garden.”
“It’s charming.” Zee drank in the benches and raised beds. Off to the side, a fountain played and flowers turned their faces up to the sun. She wanted to stand here much longer, but the clock was ticking. She’d come back later.
Next, they circled to a pavilion where a group of guys sat at long tables and a stunning woman with a head full of long curls moved between them.
“That’s Honor. My sister-in-law.” Rhae smiled. “She teaches art therapy.”
Zee stilled as she felt a sensation wash over her—one she hadn’t felt in so long she almost didn’t recognize it for what it was.
Excitement.
“I want to be part of this.” She turned to Rhae. “You all do your part—you help the veterans. For Matt—” She gulped. “For myself…I want to contribute.”
Rhae lit up. “Do you have any ideas?”
She didn’t have a lot of talents. But she had worked for a short time at a gym. “I could teach yoga.”
Rhae’s smile stretched, and a tenderness reached her eyes, making Zee feel that the therapist side of her approved of this too.
“Yes. You should teach yoga.”
She gave a little bounce of happiness. She felt lighter. Happier than she had in years.
“We’ll talk to Willow—sister to all these Malone men. I’m sure you’re going to need supplies for your class and she’s great at organizing things.”
They chatted the entire way back to the lodge. When they approached, Church was already standing there, tall and strong. His shoulders were impossibly wide and the mirrored sunglasses he always wore reflected the sun.
For a moment, Zee couldn’t breathe. Just seeing him raised feelings—new feelings she didn’t even understand.
She didn’t realize her steps had slowed until Rhae stopped beside her. “I’ll catch up with you later, Zee. I’m really excited about everything we talked about.”
“Me too. Thanks, Rhae.” She threw her a wave and a smile and hurried over to Church.
Though she couldn’t see his eyes, she saw his lips soften slightly when she reached him.
Without a word they walked to the truck. A minute later they were heading down the long, paved road that ran from the lodge toward the gates. When they reached them, Church slowed and pushed the button mounted on the console. The gates swung open.
At that moment, a warm, rough hand settled over hers.
Zee looked down at Church’s long fingers resting across her hand.
He glanced toward her. “Just practicing. For the job.”
She turned her hand beneath his and laced their fingers together.
“Me too.”
But the small flutter in her chest told her it wasn’t only that.