Chapter Nine #2
“I don’t know why I’m so tired.”
He ran the pad of his thumb across her lower lip. “I do. You’ve been in fight-or-flight mode for years. My guess is you have a lot of sleep to catch up on.”
Fight-or-flight. That was exactly what her life had been.
Not living or even surviving. Just…enduring. Her body had learned how to stay on alert, ready to leap up and make a break for a new town, even in sleep.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d fallen asleep without listening to the world around her first, trying to detect footsteps or movement.
But with Church…she hadn’t even tried to stay awake.
Her gaze drifted up his steely hard-muscled body to his rugged face. Nothing got past him and nothing ever would.
She dropped her head back on the padded chair. “I’ll only rest my eyes for a second.”
“I’ll be back for you.” He kissed her again, then he was gone. That was the last thing she remembered until she opened her eyes and found the light had shifted.
She blinked, disoriented by her surroundings. She pushed upright, smoothing her hair as she tried to get her bearings.
Then her gaze fell on Church standing near the trailer door.
“How long was I out?” Her voice was raspy from sleep.
“Most of the day.”
Her eyes widened. “What?”
“You needed it.”
“I must have really crashed.” She swung her legs off the footstool and stood.
“Your body finally realized it’s safe and took what it needed. Come on—we need to hurry before Miss Collins needs escorted to the next location.”
Her eyes flared wider and she rushed forward. Church took her by the hand and they slipped away from the trailer. Zee was only seated in her usual chair for a minute before Church was back, leading Miss Collins who wore a huge fur coat that almost dragged on the ground and soft suede boots.
Zee felt much more alert and energized too. She was pondering what he said about her feeling safe enough to truly get restorative sleep and knew it had to be true.
By the time Church returned to collect her for the ride home, she was ready to expend some of this energy.
She threw a sidelong look at him and her body stirred as she drank him in. Carved profile. That sexy thread of silver hair along his temple. Those arms that poised over her while he thrust inside her bulged with muscle. Her insides clutched.
They chatted about the action on the set, but Church was stealing glances at her too, and she couldn’t help but think, as soon as they were alone…
They rolled through the gates of the Black Heart Ranch, greeted by her newest friend, one she had only just recently taken real notice of.
The world around her.
The sun dipped low, and the air carried the early crispness of fall.
Zee barely made it out of the truck before Willow was striding toward her, a long, dark braid bouncing on her shoulder.
She faced the woman, heart suddenly pounding.
“A shipment arrived for you.”
She gulped.
“Rhae told me all about your idea to do sunrise yoga with the vets. It’s such an exciting idea.”
“Oh. Yes. Did my supplies arrive?”
Willow grinned. “There are five boxes from a yoga supply place so I’d say you’ll be ready to hold your first class tomorrow.”
Excitement rippled through her, a sensation she hadn’t felt in too long and one she could get used to.
Church rounded the truck to stand beside her. “Hi, Willow.”
The woman ducked her head in greeting. “Church. C’mon, Zee. I’ll show you where the boxes are.”
When Zee saw the packages near the front door of the lodge, her stomach tightened. The thrill of finding a few yoga supplies in town had been doused by coming out of the shop to find the truck window shattered and broken glass scattered on the ground.
She reached for a box but hesitated.
Willow moved toward the door. “I’ll get a knife to open them.”
“No need.” Church was already reaching into his pocket. He held out a small pocketknife to Zee, and she took it, acknowledging that the metal was warm from his body.
She turned the knife over in her palm, conflicted by the emotions tanged inside her. She felt a flutter of excitement but a stone of worry too, because very soon, she needed to find the courage to open the package from Matt.
But not tonight.
She gasped as she saw the colorful mats in the box.
The second one contained straps and blocks for assisting with poses.
Those might be used later once the guys got more flexible.
There were also candles in calming scents.
And the most exciting item—a small wooden plaque with a sunrise painted on it.
A breathless laugh escaped her. “This is perfect.” She looked up to see Willow and Church smiling at her.
“I’ll start tomorrow.”
Willow beamed. “We can make the announcement at dinner in the lodge.”
Dinner was a mix of lively conversations among some groups of people, including the Malone women who’d taken over one corner of a long table, and a less energetic crew at the other side of the room, including that man Zee had seen before.
Carmichael, Church had called him. He gripped a fork but didn’t eat. Instead, he stared out the window at the light fading over the ranch. Zee was pondering if he had found a new friend in the land, a way of healing he never expected, the same as she did.
As she surveyed him, he looked up and met her gaze.
Her heart clenched at the shadows visible in his eyes even from here. The man had endured unspeakable things, that much was clear. Her heart went out to him.
Because of Matt and belonging as a military wife, she felt like all these men were her family. They looked out for each other, and for each other’s families too.
She threw him a little wave, and he gave her a slight nod that she would have missed if she hadn’t been studying him so closely.
Church touched her elbow, and she turned. “You okay?” he asked, low.
“Yes.”
“Let’s get in line at the buffet.”
They did, moving slowly behind a tall, broad vet. He said a few words to Church about getting to dinner late and missing out on the pork chops.
“Pope, this is Zee.” Church’s introduction brought the man’s attention to her. He had the most striking blue eyes and was covered in tattoos, including his knuckles.
She tried to catch what the letters there spelled but couldn’t make them out without staring. “Hi, Pope.”
He gave her a nod. Though his expression was pleasant, he also bore bruises of fatigue under each eye, making her think that whatever demons haunted him didn’t let him sleep. It tugged at her heart as much as Carmichael’s story.
“Zee is holding a new class for the lodge.” Church picked up a dinner roll and set it on his plate.
“Oh yeah? What are you teaching?” Pope asked her.
“Yoga. At sunrise.” She was a little nervous it was too early and no one would wake up for a silly old yoga class.
“I’ll be there. I watch the sun come up every day anyhow.” His lips quirked, but it looked like a wince.
“I can’t wait to see you there.”
They joined the Malone women for dinner, and Zee was introduced to the big group.
Each member of the family was lovely and gracious to her.
Navy was seated in a booster seat and there was an infant strapped into a reclining seat next to a woman named Layne.
She introduced the baby as CJ—short for Carson Jr. after his father.
“You’ll meet them all soon,” Layne said with a smile.
Zee nodded, astonished that everyone was so welcoming to a stranger.
When they started talking about a big fall festival on the ranch that upcoming weekend, she couldn’t help but be intrigued.
They discussed decorating the lodge and the house, as well as planning the best days for hayrides and bonfires.
Fern brought up harvesting the pumpkins in the community garden and making pies and roasting pumpkin seeds. Zee didn’t fully understand the work but it all sounded like fun.
“You’ll love it here in the fall,” a stunning woman named Shiloh told her. “It’s the best time of year.”
Church listened while he ate, adding nothing to the conversation, but Zee could see he was interested too.
She caught his attention. “Have you participated in the fall festivities?”
He paused in eating. “It’s my first fall here too.”
Her chest warmed at the thought of being cuddled against Church’s side as they bounced through the field in a wagon towed by a tractor.
She smiled. “It sounds like fun. Will the new operators in training be allowed to come?”
“I’m not sure how that works. We’ll be learning the ropes together.”
He stared into her eyes for a beat that lasted so long her insides began to heat. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Shiloh bump elbows with Layne and both women glanced between her and Church.
She wondered if they saw the desire plain on her face or the way she couldn’t tear her gaze away from him.
After their meal, they announced she was holding yoga at sunrise, and she was so pleased to see a bunch of the men nodding.
Willow added that rain was in the forecast over the weekend. That brought a lot of chatter about whether the fall festivities could continue that weekend as planned.
Willow jumped on a chair and waved her arms to get everyone’s attention. Many of the guys laughed at her antics, and Zee could see why the woman was so loved and respected by everyone.
“Don’t worry—if it rains this weekend, we push the festivities back a weekend or two. There will still be bonfires and pumpkin pies!”
That earned her a cheer, and Willow waved her hands to urge a louder response.
When it died down a little, Church offered her a hand to help her off the chair. She jumped down, laughing.
When Zee and Church walked out of the lodge with Willow and some of the others, the wall of dark clouds was visible on the horizon. The breeze teased at their hair and clothes, thick with the taste of coming rain.
Willow wrapped her arms around herself. “Well, I guess the festival is postponed.”
Rhae cradled Navy to her. “Maybe by the time we reschedule, the guys will be home to join us.” She pressed a kiss to her daughter’s head as if she could shower affection on Denver’s daughter in his place.
Zee and Church broke away from the others, strolling slowly. As they walked, their bodies seemed drawn together like two magnets, and their arms bumped with a soft rustle of fabric.
“Do you think those guys will really come to my class?” she asked.
“I do. You’d be surprised how many of them participate in classes you’d never think fit them. Like Honor’s art class and Juliette’s music performances.”
They found a spot where the lights of the lodge didn’t reach. Above them the stars popped out all over the deep blue canvas of the sky. One. Then ten. Then hundreds.
They stopped at the small stretch of fence that felt like their spot and leaned against it. Zee tipped her head back, drinking in the sight.
“It’s incredible.”
“I’ve never seen anything like it.” Church’s body heat felt like a soft stroke along her side. When she looked at him, she saw he wasn’t staring at the sky—he was staring at her.
Even though she had a lot of reasons to hide herself away, and a new worry waiting for her on that coffee table back in the loft, she pushed those things aside and let herself live, for once, in the present.
At the expression in his eyes, her chest gave a tight squeeze. She turned to him and slipped her arms around his neck. He groaned as she pressed her body against his, as though he’d been waiting for this moment all day.
Their lips met in a seeking kiss and broke off endless minutes later, both of them panting for more.
“A girl could get used to this,” she said softly, nuzzling him.
His gaze locked on hers as he rumbled, “Get used to it.”