Chapter 6
CAL
There’s not enough coffee in all of Blackstone Falls and the surrounding areas to stave off the headache that’s pounding in my head.
It has everything to do with the fact that Blake will be arriving at my house in a couple of hours and I’ve done nothing but pace and angst over having him in my space.
What the hell was I thinking?
The short answer is I wasn’t. I was still enthralled with the smell of his expensive cologne on my skin and the twinkle in Ellison’s eyes when she floated out of the kitchen. I’d wanted to know what secret they were keeping and I wanted to be a part of it.
I wanted a few more minutes with him.
The long answer, once I found out what Blake really needed, isn’t as complicated. I’m just embarrassed by my willingness. Who in their right mind would fake date someone for two months?
Me.
Because for two months, I can have that closeness again without the heartache that follows. I can pretend that I don’t miss having someone to come home to every night, and even though he will not be warming my bed, I can relish in knowing he’s there.
Fucking pathetic.
Which is why I need to be talked off the proverbial ledge this morning.
I can’t talk to Ellison or any of the girls. I can’t talk to my sister because I won’t be able to handle her look of sympathy.
That just leaves Tanner, my accidental—and platonic—friend in town.
He’s working like he always is on a Sunday at Vetted Paws, the veteran dog rescue he runs with Sorren Mackay.
The two of them have worked tirelessly to provide good homes and resources for dogs and veterans alike.
They’ve received national recognition and done incredible things for the community.
When I was named coach of the varsity cross-country team, I worked with Tanner to facilitate biweekly runs with the dogs. The kids love it and so do the dogs.
Everyone wins.
But that’s not why I’m here.
The bell above the door chimes as I push my way into Vetted Paws, ignoring Jude’s brother, Deacon, standing at the desk as Tanner blushes furiously at whatever he just said. Tanner has had a thing for the guy since the first time Deacon walked in almost a year ago but hasn’t made a move.
Or accepted any of the moves Deacon is throwing his way.
If I was in a better state of mind, I would have let whatever this is play out first.
I might have even tried to be a wingman.
But I’m in crisis mode so Deacon will have to try his luck later.
“Hey, you got a minute?” I ask, ignoring the man at the counter and barreling toward Tanner as he gapes.
“Oh, I mean—”
“Great,” I cut him off, my hand on his chest as I back him into the open office behind him.
“We’ve already tried this, remember?” he says wryly as I slam the door behind us and bury my face in my hands.
“I remember…” The words are muffled and I want to laugh at the memory. I’d just moved to Blackstone Falls to be closer to my sister, and she thought it’d be a great idea for Tanner and me to do one of those stranger photo sessions.
The chemistry was lacking, and while we powered through it, there was no denying there would never be a spark.
On the plus side, I got a really great friend out of it.
“So, besides me needing to be saved from myself out there, what’s going on?”
“I fucked up,” I tell him, forcing myself to say the words even as my body thinks otherwise.
“All right…” He trails off like he’s refrained from adding you need to be more specific.
As if I fuck up all the time.
I don’t.
Not like this at least.
“I hooked up with Blake.”
“Which one is that again?”
“Ellison’s ex-boyfriend. He’s here visiting. I just didn’t know that.”
Tanner’s eyebrows have disappeared into his hairline. “How did you not know who he was?”
“I wasn’t thinking.”
“Obviously.” I glare at him and he holds his hands up in surrender. “I’m just saying that I’m sure it was pretty obvious he wasn’t from around here.”
He’s right, of course.
Blake looked like an outsider.
A hot, rich, hell-of-a-good-time outsider.
“Is Ellison mad?”
“No, she thinks it’s hilarious.”
He scratches his jaw. “Okay, so aside from you hooking up with your friend’s ex-boyfriend, what’s the problem?”
“I didn’t know who he was.”
“Yeah, I got that part.”
“Tanner, he wants me to pretend to be his boyfriend. And then he wants me to go with him to Savannah to a gala and parade me around as said boyfriend.”
“Okay…” he says slowly like he’s waiting for the punchline, but that is the punchline and fuck, why the hell would he think that’s normal?
“And I already agreed.” His eyes widen slightly but he just stares at me. “Why aren’t you saying anything?” I bark, exasperated and annoyed.
“Because honestly, what is there to say? You’ve already made your decision.
Plus that’s not the weirdest thing I’ve heard since I moved here.
Hell, that’s not the weirdest thing I’ve dealt with this week.
And, if we’re really going there, the person I came out to, that wasn’t immediate family, is the guy now married to my ex-wife because I didn’t want to fight him in my backyard. ”
“I—what?” I ask, blinking at him as I try to process that. “I feel like I missed that story.”
Tanner lifts a shoulder and lets it drop.
“And now,” he says without acknowledging me, “that guy buys us matching shirts and tells me every chance he gets how much he loves me and how happy he is to have me as a part of his family.”
“We got lucky with the Thayer brothers,” I admit because it’s true. While Otto married Tanner’s ex-wife, Otto’s twin brother, Case, married my sister. They’re both exhausting but they’re drop everything, give you the shirt off their back kind of guys. “But what’s your point?”
“I’m just saying life doesn’t follow the path you think it will and honestly, what’s the worst that happens? You have to hang out with someone you already have some chemistry with, eat a fancy dinner, and say thanks for a good time?”
“You make it sound like it’s not a big deal.”
“Because it’s not, Cal. You know what you want and what you don’t want, and you can put whatever boundaries in place that you need.
” He motions toward the door. “There is or was an incredibly good-looking guy who, for whatever reason, is interested in me, and I just can’t get out of my own way to say yes.
And eventually, he’s going to stop asking and—”
“Why won’t you say yes?” I ask, trying to remember the last time Tanner and I actually talked about anything other than the dogs and kids running.
“Now that’s complicated.”
“It’s really not. You like him, he likes you… What’s complicated?”
“I’m a single dad with an ex-wife and an overly clingy bonus dad.”
“I think there are worse things…”
“Everyone wants me to start dating and I get it. It’s been almost five years since the divorce, but there’s so much pressure.
No one can keep a secret in this town, and if things don’t work out then I have to deal with not only the fallout with one person but everyone and their looks of sympathy.
” The words come out in a rush and now it’s my turn to look surprised. “It’s exhausting.”
“Shit, man, I—”
He points an accusatory finger at me. “No. See? That right there. That’s what I’m trying to avoid.”
“Fair,” I admit, even though I hate that he’s feeling like this. “I guess I’ll go home and stop bitching about Blake and our fake relationship.”
Tanner chuckles and shakes his head. “That’s not what I mean either.”
“No, but you’re right. I can handle this, and when you’re ready, you can handle a date too. Like you said, set the boundaries and go at your own pace.”
“We’ll see.”
I guess we will.