Chapter Seventeen
LOGAN
My kids were never early risers, but of course the one morning I needed them to sleep as long as possible, they were up with the sun.
I wanted five minutes to talk to Izzy before I dragged them out of bed.
But when Izzy walked into the kitchen, I got the feeling it didn't matter.
She wasn't outright angry toward me, but she avoided meeting my gaze.
Nikki and Alice were already on their stools on the other side of the island eating bowls of cereal. I half expected them to give me a hard time about not making pancakes. Maybe I'd do that next time I had a morning off with them.
Once the girls finished, they ran into the great room and turned a show on. I glanced at my watch. I only had ten more minutes before I had to leave.
Izzy grabbed the bowls and brought them to the sink. The silence was killing me.
“I wanted to talk about last night.” The words tumbled from my mouth quickly.
“What's there to talk about?”
So she wanted to ignore what I said? Act like it didn't happen? Like I didn't almost kiss her?
I should be thankful, but I wasn't.
“Izzy, I—”
“No.” Her one-word response held no anger, but it held a lot of surety.
She shook her head and turned to me, fists slamming onto her hips.
Her voice was barely above a whisper as she spoke.
“It's fine. You've been hot and cold since Jay's wedding and obviously have some hang-up. I was stupid last night thinking you coming to change my tire meant anything was different.” She took a breath and glanced quickly over to the girls before continuing.
“I need this job. I like this job. And I don't need to be let down gently.
We're on the same page now, don't worry.”
I stared after her as she turned and walked into the great room. Were we on the same page? This was what I wanted, right? To explain to her all the reasons why we couldn't be together. I should be happy. But what I felt was anything but happiness.
And that feeling only intensified as the day went on.
Of course, today of all days needed to be a slow day.
Only two calls, and both were quick, which left me with a ton of time to harp on what Izzy had said this morning.
I tried to busy myself with stupid crap like washing the truck and grabbing a few of the guys to do some drills.
But it didn’t help keep my mind focused.
It kept drifting back to the gorgeous blonde who smelled of strawberries.
What the fuck was wrong with me? I didn’t know what I’d expected from her, or what I wanted.
And what did she mean when she said she was stupid for thinking me coming to change her tire meant things were different?
Did she think I'd tell her no? If I had to, I would have woken the girls and put them in the car.
Her calling her brother never even crossed my mind until she said it.
But now I couldn’t stop wondering about it. Why did she call me instead of her brother? Did calling me feel right? Because that was how it felt for me.
My phone vibrating on the table in front of me interrupted my thoughts.
I picked it up and clicked on the Google Nest notification, bolting up straight as it alerted me that there was smoke in my kitchen.
I glanced at the time. It was after four o'clock, which meant Izzy and the girls should be home by now.
My stomach dropped as I tried calling Izzy and she didn't pick up. What the fuck was going on?
I stood and turned to the guys in the room. “We need to swing by my house.” I walked past them. “I'll explain in the truck.”
I heard Jay tell Zack to stay behind with the probie. They would be able to grab one of the utility trucks and meet us there if a call came through.
On the way to my house, I updated Jay and Adam, all of us breathing a sigh of relief when we pulled up out front and there was no sign of a fire. But the nerves were back when we walked in the side door and the obvious smell of char hit my nose.
“Izzy?”
She stepped from the great room with her hands on her hips.
“Why the heck do you have smoke detectors that talk to you?
And how do you shut them up? Because waving a dish towel at it didn't work.
She's very passive-aggressive by the way. Repeatedly giving me a heads up that there is smoke in the kitchen. Like really?” She rolled her green eyes. “I couldn't tell.”
I chuckled, thankful that everything was okay, and stepped forward. Reaching out, I gripped her shoulder, ready to pull her in for a hug, but froze when her brows rose and she glanced behind me.
I locked my jaw and patted her shoulder. “Glad everything's okay.” I let my hand fall back to my side. “What happened?”
In my periphery, I caught Jay's stare, but he wasn't my priority. Izzy was. Although she wore a smile, I could tell she was flustered.
She took a breath before words tumbled from her mouth.
“I had cookies in the oven and then Alice came running in and said Nikki fell off the swing set, so I went out back to check on her and she was crying.” She took a long pull of air before going on.
“Her knee was bleeding and I completely forgot about the cookies.
By the time we came back in, the stupid thing was warning me there was smoke in the kitchen.
Which again is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
I couldn't get it to shut up. Finally, I opened a bunch of windows and it eventually stopped a few minutes ago.”
I nodded. “Sorry about that. I'll have you download the app and sign in so you can turn it off from your phone.”
“Or you could be normal and have the cheap battery-operated ones.”
A smirk tugged at my lips as I took in her flushed cheeks. “Sorry sweetheart, that's not happening.”
Her eyes widened as she stared at me. Fuck. Why did that endearment roll off my tongue so easily now? I could feel Jay's glare burning into me.
“Assuming Nikki's alright now?” I'd deal with Jay if I needed to, once I made sure my family was okay.
She nodded, looking away. “Yes. Just a cut.”
“Want me to check it out?” Adam asked, stepping between Jay and me.
I nodded. “Yeah. Thanks.”
After making sure everyone was good, we headed back out to the truck. I climbed into the driver's seat as usual and let out a sigh when Jay climbed up into the passenger seat. Awesome.
The door wasn’t even shut all the way before he turned to me with a glare. “You two sleeping together?”
I shook my head. “No.” At least that I could answer without lying.
“This should be fun,” Adam mumbled.
Jay sent him a glare before turning back to me. “That's either a lie or a not yet.”
I swallowed, but kept quiet.
“So which one is it?” Jay scoffed. “My bet is on the latter because I don't think you'd outright lie to me.” He rubbed a hand down his face. “She's too young for you,” he spat out.
“I agree.” That part I could comment on. But I didn't understand why I couldn't utter the words I knew he wanted me to.
“And she really needs that job. Don't mess that up for her.”
I nodded. “Not planning on it.”
“Damn it, man. I mean it.” The glare was back.
I stopped at a red light and turned to look at him. “I hear you, loud and clear.”
He didn't want me dating his sister, and I got it. I hadn't expected anything else.
The rest of the shift felt like forever. I wanted to get out of there. Jay didn't say another word to me, and barely even looked at me.
Adam stepped up next to me at the counter as I finished washing the dishes from dinner. “Can I give you some advice?”
“I don't need advice.”
He sighed. “Well, pretend you do. Pretend there's a chance something might happen with Izzy.”
I narrowed my eyes on him. “There's not.”
He cocked a brow and waited.
Who was I kidding? All I could think about all day was pulling Izzy into my arms. How I was as worried about her as I was about my kids. Even I wasn't sure I could keep resisting the pull between us.
I thrust a plate at him. “If you're going to give out unsolicited advice, at least help dry.”
He grabbed a dish towel and started drying. “Tell Jay you like her.”
“What?” I looked back over at him, trying to figure out how that would help me.
“If he knows you want something serious with her, he'll be more on board.”
I handed him another plate. “I want advice on how not to go there, not how to make Jay okay with it, dumbass.”
He chuckled. “From what I saw today, I think we're past that. Now it's about making the fallout not as bad.”
I huffed and continued to wash the dishes as I thought over what he said. I agreed with Jay. Izzy was too young for me. My life came with baggage that wasn't fair to her. She was barely old enough to drink and go out to bars.
And the one thing I was sure of? If I went there with her, it wouldn't be a one-time thing. She'd be mine.