Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
COLBY
Later, Colby was still wide awake. The barn was still. Even the sounds of horses methodically chewing hay had stopped as the night had deepened, a chill in the air making it clear that fall was here and meant business.
He might have countered the temperature by shifting and curling up in wolf form.
No one had told him he couldn’t, and he should have felt safer that way, with more weapons to protect himself.
But somehow, he didn’t want to lose this form, in which he’d had that moment with Tristan.
A moment like he thought he’d never have again, filled with hope and promise and brightness.
So instead, he curled up awkwardly on the straw bale. It was uncomfortable and itchy, but better than the chill of the concrete floor.
Bryce had come for him earlier, offering him a quick trip to a bathroom. Despite the kindness of the toothbrush waiting for him, Bryce hadn’t said a word beyond what was necessary, and Colby didn’t know what to make of any of it. There’d been no sign of Tristan, however hard he’d looked.
He wrapped his arms tighter around himself and thought of Tristan, of the way his smile lit not only his face but whatever room he was in, and the curiosity in his eyes. Especially when he looked at Colby, like he wanted to know every part of him.
The barn door creaked, and light spilled through the slats. He sat up, tense until he recognized the tread. Even though he’d only heard it a handful of times, he knew it instantly. Tristan was here.
He was fumbling with the stall door more than Colby would have expected, and when it finally swung open, Colby could see the reason—he had a dark green comforter in his arms that he was trying desperately to hold onto while it made a bid for freedom, all without dropping the phone he held as a flashlight.
“Hey,” Tristan said, his voice muffled by the comforter. Then his head poked up over it. “Hope I didn’t wake you.”
“I couldn’t sleep,” Colby confessed.
“Me neither. Okay if I join you?”
For a traitorous instant, Colby’s heart leapt. He wanted nothing more than that. But then he realized the risk Tristan was running just by being here, after Bryce had ordered him out earlier. “Won’t you get in trouble?”
In fact, he was surprised no one had arrived yet, with the light. The horses were definitely awake. He could hear movements, little snuffles and snorts, and that slow, rhythmic chewing started up again as if at least one of them had decided a midnight snack was in order.
“Technically, I haven’t been told I can’t be here,” Tristan said, and dumped the comforter on the straw bale, where it slowly unspooled.
Colby was beginning to think that this pack was very different from Cale’s, but even so, disobeying any alpha was a seriously bad move. “I doubt Urban will see it that way.”
Tristan turned and closed the door behind him. “Let me worry about that,” he said as he swung back. “Also, that comforter’s damn heavy and I think I strained something dragging it over here, so please don’t make me take it back.”
Colby knew he should protest, should send Tristan away, but he wasn’t that strong.
“God only knows what Karl’s going to think, seeing me lugging my bedding around the yard at this time of night. I mean, not that I saw him out there, but he’s there, watching, I just know it. Oh, hey—you didn’t have your muffins. Don’t you like them?”
Truth to tell, Colby had forgotten about them. He’d eaten the food that Urban had brought him, but that was all.
“I like them fine,” he said, feeling his way. He wasn’t sure if he was in trouble for not eating them. It didn’t sound as if he were, but then, Nico hadn’t always let him know upfront. And Tristan had gone to the trouble of bringing them to him. “I think I forgot. Sorry.”
Something showed on Tristan’s face, something that looked strangely like guilt, which made no sense.
“I’ll get you some fresh ones tomorrow. Believe me, once you’ve tasted Jason’s baking, you’ll never want to eat anything else ever again.”
Tomorrow. Hollowness filled his chest at the word. He wasn’t at all sure he had one.
But then Tristan smiled, gentle and bright and utterly Tristan.
Colby couldn’t help it. A tiny answering smile tugged at his own mouth. It wasn’t much, but it was more than he’d had in a long time.
TRISTAN
He’d meant to go see Colby after Matt was done with him, but stopped to grab a hoodie against the evening chill and put his phone on charge. Bryce had retrieved both his miraculously undamaged phone and car from the diner’s lot.
Then he figured he should check his email, just in case any of his professors had written about the classes he’d missed. Somehow, lying on his bed, phone in hand, he fell asleep.
He woke from uneasy dreams to a silent house. It was after midnight, and he hadn’t seen Colby since they’d kissed. Not even once. The thought of Colby sitting out there alone, uncertain of his fate, hit a little too close to home.
He was sure, now that Colby had been here longer and Matt had started to get to know him, that Matt’s decision wouldn’t be the one he’d feared, but he might still send him away from the ranch, away from Tristan.
It wasn’t even a conscious choice on his part. He dragged the comforter off his bed, so he had something warm to sleep under—possibly beside Colby, he thought, and it thrilled through him, heady and exciting. Then, he headed out to the barn.
He didn’t know what happened next. Would Colby want to kiss him again? God, he hoped so. He so hoped. But even if he didn’t, Tristan wanted the comfort of his presence. There was something about being with Colby that made him feel right, deep inside.
He didn’t think Colby would send him away again. But if he did—if this whole thing was just hope on Tristan’s part—well, he’d have to find a way to explain to Karl why he was wandering around in the dead of night with a comforter in his arms.
Too much to hope that Karl wouldn’t notice. Tristan had no idea where Karl was right now as he crossed the yard, but he knew he’d be watching. And honestly? That was a comfort because, for the first time, the familiar yard felt ominous, as if each shadow cast by the red moon was harboring a threat.
When he got to the barn, Colby was pleased to see him, giving that small, shy smile that Tristan had only seen a couple of times but to which he was hopelessly addicted. The one that changed his face and made him look alive.
More than anything, Tristan wanted to pull him into another hug and keep him there, but Bryce’s warning rang in his head, stark, uncomfortable, and important.
Colby had never had a choice in his old pack.
If Bryce hadn’t said anything, Tristan might not have realized just how easy it would be to assume Colby’s consent.
And then Tristan had really put his foot in his mouth.
A simple question about muffins had sounded like an accusation, and Colby had looked scared that he’d done something wrong.
Searching for a way to change the subject, he glanced around the stall, and his heart plummeted as he noted the only bedding in sight was his comforter.
“They didn’t give you blankets?” It spilled out of him in hurt and incomprehension.
This wasn’t the pack he knew. This wasn’t Matt, and it sure as hell wasn’t Bryce, always so compassionate and thoughtful.
Did it mean they really didn’t trust Colby, and Tristan was fooling himself over Colby’s fate?
“I could always shift,” Colby pointed out, and what the hell was going on, that Colby was defending Tristan’s pack to him?
“Yeah, I guess,” Tristan said, and the tightness that had clutched his chest eased. Of course. He hadn’t thought things through. But he didn’t want to spend the night with Colby shifted. He wanted to talk to him, maybe to have Colby’s arms around him again.
“I’ll get some horse blankets for us to lie on, keep off the chill from the floor,” he said, then paused. “You’re not allergic or anything, are you? I hope not, because half the pack smell of horse half the time, so that wouldn’t be great.”
And then he realized he was rushing ahead.
Way, way ahead. Before that moment, he hadn’t even thought about Colby staying here forever.
All he wanted was the chance to explore this thing between them, to discover if it could be something more.
Tristan thought it could be, and he wanted that, so badly.
“Mind coming with me and helping with the light?” he asked, waving his phone.
“If I put the overhead one on, the horses’ll think it’s breakfast time, and Diablo’s so damn loud that he’ll wake the entire house if he gets started.
And that’ll wake the goats, and you really don’t want to upset them because they bear a grudge like it’s an Olympic sport.
I don’t honestly know what Christian sees in Diablo,” he confessed.
“He always wants attention, and then he’s liable to spook at the most ridiculous things when you take him out. ”
About to launch into a recital of the random harmless items Diablo had taken exception to, he realized that Colby hadn’t followed him to the door. He glanced back over his shoulder inquiringly.
Colby was absolutely still, holding himself rigid and scarcely even breathing.
“Help me with the blankets?” Tristan asked again, softly, not sure what he’d said to cause this.
“I’m not sure I should leave the stall,” Colby said carefully, his eyes flicking between Tristan’s face and the floor.
It took him an instant to realize what he’d done, but then Tristan’s heart plummeted, leaving his chest hollow. He’d asked Colby to do something Matt would disapprove of, not even thinking. And now Colby was frozen, too afraid to say no. Even to him.
“Yeah, of course, that’s fine. Absolutely not a problem, of course I can manage,” he gabbled. “I’ll be right back.”