Chapter 13 #2
It was hard to hear that so many were petty. Realistically, I knew it was probably more and they just wouldn’t apologize. I was glass half full like that… But I probably wasn’t wrong.
Still, I tried to focus on that it was good they were apologizing.
Even if a few asked how Winter was in bed trying to get the gossip that I had lost my purity.
I gave them a look that I wasn’t stupid and asked them their names to make it clear they were being rude and still bitches.
It mostly worked but yeah, it was clear there still needed to be a lot done on campus.
Our society even. Awesome.
That bitch in my year and most of my classes finally, finally shut up about me now that people’s opinion of me has changed. She hadn’t said one shit thing even to her friends. I still received hostile looks and eye rolls, but she would wait a long time until I gave a shit.
I still felt too often that I was living that Post Malone song talking about running in circles, but everyone else said it’s good progress. It’s progress, I just don’t see it as good. Like it’s not that big to be good.
Mostly because it shouldn’t ever have been that bad, but I got it.
I was really glad when Wyatt ranted for a good ten minutes completely agreeing with me. Awesome, we could be salty and glass half empty together. I told him that and he laughed when I high-fived him. He promised to keep it our little secret.
Things were great there and I liked him.
Well, not like that.
Well, not not like that.
I mean, he was hot. He was beyond hot and yeah, I thought of him at times I shouldn’t and had a dirty dream I won’t ever admit to since he became my priest. But what I mean was… As a person. I liked him now.
I got him now. We’d talked a lot about what happened, and the wounds and missteps were still tender—for both of us even—but yeah, we were healing and I thought we actually liked each other as people. I felt like he liked me now.
Oh fuck, it all sounded so damn grade school in my head even.
He was nice and I could talk to him. I didn’t feel he just saw me as sex and wanting to lead the stupid blonde around by the nose. That was where I was at. He was also very protective of me as my priest which was fucking awesome. I didn’t regret the choice I made, not for a second.
We were going to work over fall break on what it all means and start with ideas on how to… Be a goddess witch now that I was really caught up with school and in a better routine?
And that had been fucking phenomenal as well. Things had been more organized, but I wanted to lock in on a real schedule. People were pushing me not to be so rigid and to be kind to myself, but I didn’t see it like that.
I didn’t have to stick to the schedule after it all.
I was trying to juggle too much, and I thought it was needed to really get my life together.
Most people did not juggle being the head of a family and having an estate, being owner of a company, a full-time college student, and whatever all I was doing being a goddess witch.
Or goddaughter of a goddess?
How the fuck was the non-blasphemous way to say it?
Did it really matter? No. No, I was not going to worry about it among my other piles of issues.
I just also wanted to see it all laid out—have it all laid out so more wasn’t just thrown in or added on me. I think people needed to see how my time was blocked off too so they understood how busy my days were and how much I really accomplished.
For my sanity at least.
Like running. Too many were always trying to push off my running because I was always running or it was something easy to push off.
To them.
It was easy to push off to them, but I needed it. Especially now that people were relying on me for the running club on campus. Granted, most weren’t thrilled that I was excelling somewhere else, but most of the witches who had joined were thrilled there was always someone to run with.
My long runs went so long that people could come at different times which made them happy.
Nigel was really stepping up to push himself to run more too, joining me every time.
Sergey and Kelton didn’t seem happy about that, but I thought it was more that we had to be super careful now on campus about being involved.
But apparently not. People were making comments about it not being strictly friendly on their end and the people who knew we were involved were amused.
Gloria finally spelled it out for me that they were jealous that Nigel was finding a way to get closer to me when he already had the edge of being in most of my classes. I just sighed and told them to run more then and I couldn’t slow down for them.
Apparently, that was a badass, queen, and girl power thing to say?
This socializing thing was difficult. I thought it was bitchy and not understanding of their feelings when they had been of mine, but I’d been tired. Maybe because I hadn’t said it to their faces? So timing was always important?
Could I get an instruction manual like I did schoolbooks?
Please?
Getting into a real routine for running helped a lot and it was immediate. I went four days once over the two weeks without crying and that was big fast. For me—to me at least. I didn’t care about what others thought, though Emma agreed and even Taylor said he was glad I was doing better.
But the offer for yoga stood.
Awesome. I did want to go. I wanted to add it, but I was proud of myself for saying what I needed and wanted first. Really proud of myself even. Clare said the same and she wanted to learn to do the same.
Jasmine and Tracey said she was doing much better too. Clare wasn’t a runner, but every morning she took a walk around the lake with her familiar. Easy, long stroll with coffee but good for her.
Really, good for her. I wanted her to heal.
Didn’t we all just need that?