Chapter 8 #2
Another nod. “I…I don’t know how to calculate percentages,” he said softly.
“You don’t need to,” I said. “Take the taxes and double them. So, if the taxes are $2.50, just add 2.5 and 2.5. When you double the taxes, the tip is usually around the fifteen or twenty percent mark. If you want to leave more or less based on the service, just add in a couple bucks or take a couple bucks away.”
Levi held still for a moment. His eyes looked watery, but he didn’t cry.
He finally nodded and I removed my hand.
He pulled the billfold back and I wasn’t surprised when he had to start all over again and count out the original amount of the bill.
Then he dug out his phone and carefully entered the numbers into the calculator app.
When he had the amount, he slowly counted that out too and then added a couple more dollars, leaving him with several dollars in his hand.
“Thank you,” he said softly, though he refused to look at me when he said it.
I reached across the small table and forced his chin up. “You’re welcome,” I said. “You have nothing to be ashamed of, Levi. ”
He pulled free of my hold, but kept his eyes on me. “We should go,” he murmured.
I left the issue alone since I understood he was raw from the embarrassment of it all. We thanked our waitress as we left the diner. “See you boys tomorrow,” she called and then shot us a wink.
A knowing wink.
I smiled at Levi who was blushing. Yeah, he knew exactly what that waitress was thinking. But even though I was smiling on the outside, inside I felt only guilt. Every second I was with Levi, I was lying to him. On top of that, I was lying to Ronan too.
Hell, I was lying to myself.
Thinking I could walk away from this the same man I’d been going in. Even if I was forced to do the unthinkable and take Levi’s life, I wouldn’t be the same. Even if he proved he was the same man he’d been seven years ago when he’d watched Seth being tortured, I’d now seen this other side of him.
The side I didn’t think he was faking.
Once we reached the car, I held the door open for him like I always did, but instead of climbing in, Levi stopped next to me.
Suddenly, he turned and put his hand on my shoulder and then he was reaching up to brush his mouth over my cheek in a fleeting kiss.
We both hung there for the briefest of moments and I willed him to seek out my lips next. But he didn’t.
Instead, he stepped back a little and sent me a small smile. “Thank you, Phoenix.”
“For what?” I asked. “You paid…I should be thanking you.”
He started to get in the car, but then stopped and looked at me. “For that,” he said, motioning to the diner. His eyes lifted to where my hand was resting on the door. “For this.” He paused. “For everything.”
Fuck, I wanted to grab him and kiss him then and there, not caring who saw us or what it would do to me…or him.
But I settled for, “You’re welcome, Levi.”
He got into the car and buckled up while I closed the door. Even though I’d been driving him home for several days now, he still gave me directions, though I didn’t need them since I’d been driving the damn route for two weeks now as part of my surveillance of him.
Two weeks of lying.
Two weeks of waiting.
Two weeks of utter hell.
I pulled the car to a stop across from his building. I was half-tempted to get out of the car and open the door for him just to delay what little time I had left with him.
“See you later?”
I nodded. “I’ll pick you up at four.”
I was glad when he didn’t argue with me like he had the past few mornings. But unlike the other mornings, he didn’t get out of the car right away. His eyes lifted to meet mine and I saw something there I hadn’t expected I’d ever see.
But it was there, clear as day.
Desire.
Raw and needy.
Just like that, the air around us changed, becoming heavy with electricity. My whole body lit up in anticipation and my cock, which was always half-hard around the young man, began thickening uncomfortably in my pants.
I couldn’t do this. It was just one more complication in a list of many.
“Phoenix,” Levi whispered, his voice heavy with need and confusion. He knew what he wanted, but he clearly had no idea how to go about getting it. It was a reminder that, despite what I’d seen in the alley with him and T, there were certain aspects of sex that were foreign to him.
I was leaning in before I could stop myself, but with a good foot still separating us, Levi let out a strangled, “Oh my God!” and then he was out of the car like a shot.
I quickly climbed out of the car, immediately searching for danger.
And found it almost instantly.
“Henry!”
Levi’s terrified shout carried across the street as he ran for the entrance to the building. But my eyes were stuck on what he’d already seen.
Because four stories up sitting dangerously close to the side of the building’s fire escape was a baby, completely unaware of the peril it was in. Behind the baby was an open window, but there was no adult in sight.
I sprinted across the street as I watched the baby crawl closer to the edge of the landing it was sitting on. The bars that should have been there to protect people from stepping off the landing were gone. If the baby moved even a few more inches, it would topple over the edge.
As I reached the bottom of the fire escape, I vaulted onto a nearby dumpster and then used the extra height to make the leap to the ladder which was a good ten feet off the ground.
As soon as my hands closed around the bottom rung, the ladder descended and I began scrambling up it.
I kept my eyes on the baby as I climbed up to the first landing.
The noise of the ladder descending had fortunately distracted the baby and it had stopped its forward crawl.
“Hey, what are you doing up so early?” I said to the baby in a cheerful voice, even though I was still two floors below it. The sound of my voice attracted the baby’s attention and by the time I reached the landing, the child was watching me with wide eyes.
My whole body was shaking like crazy as I reached down to pick the baby up.
Based on the name Levi had used and the blue shirt covered in trains that the baby was wearing, I was guessing it was a he.
The baby, Henry, was wearing only a diaper besides the shirt.
His skin was chilled so I quickly pulled him against my body and wrapped the lower part of my shirt around his lower half.
“Henry!” I heard Levi scream. I ducked into the open window to see the front door crash open and a panicked Levi tearing into the apartment.
“Henry! Oh, thank you God!” he cried when he saw the baby.
I quickly handed the baby over to him. Tears began streaming down his face unchecked as he examined the child. My guess was that the baby was somewhere between nine months and a year old. He had brown hair and huge blue eyes and he smiled happily as Levi spoke to him.
“Thank you, thank you,” Levi cried as he wrapped an arm around me and cried against my chest.
“Shhh, he’s okay, Levi,” I murmured as I dropped a kiss on the top of his head.
I put my arm around him to steady him as the panic finally began to leach from his system.
When he released me to focus on the baby, I searched the small living room we were standing in and then spotted the Pack-N-Play.
I grabbed a fleece blanket from it and then wrapped it around the baby before I led Levi over to the couch.
“What the fuck is going on out here?”
I looked up to see a man wearing nothing more than boxers and a plain white undershirt standing near the entrance to the living room. His dark hair was messy, like he’d just woken up, and his eyes were red-rimmed.
Levi stiffened next to me, but then he stood up.
“What the hell happened, Dad?” he nearly yelled. “Henry was out on the fire escape!”
The man seemed confused for a moment and dropped his eyes to the baby briefly. “Must have forgotten to put him back in his thing” – he waved his hand at the Pack N Play – “after I fed him.”
“That’s it?” Levi said in astonishment. “He could have been killed!”
“He’s fine,” the man said, his voice slurring a bit. I could smell the alcohol wafting off him even from where I was standing.
“Who is this?” the man said as his eyes shifted to me, his lips twisting into an ugly sneer.
“Phoenix. He’s my friend,” Levi murmured, though his voice had lost some of its edge. “He saved Henry.”
Levi’s father shifted his suddenly ice cold gaze to his son. “You dare bring this into my house?” he said, his voice full of disgust.
I knew that tone of voice. I’d experienced it on more than one occasion growing up.
It was the voice that reminded me I wasn’t equal.
That even after years of serving my country, saving lives and being a good citizen, I was still defined by the color of my skin.
As a black man who also happened to be gay, I routinely had to deal with an extra dose of bigotry, even from members of my own race, but to hear the disdain coming from Levi’s father stung.
Not because I gave a shit what the fucker thought of me, but because it made me wonder about the man I’d been spending the last several days with.
“Dad-”
“Get the fuck out!” the man snarled at me. “Your kind isn’t welcome here!”
“Dad!” Levi said as he took a few steps forward, but as soon his father began heading towards him, hands fisted, Levi stepped back and I quickly put him behind me.
The move stopped Levi’s father in his tracks.
“Get your nigger ass out of here before I call the cops!” the man warned.
“Levi, get Henry’s things,” I said. As pissed as I was, I wasn’t about to leave Levi and the baby with the fucker. I’d seen enough to know where the man’s rage would fall if I left them both here.
I kept my eyes on Levi’s father, but saw Levi moving quickly to grab a diaper bag off the couch. “Is that it?” I asked.
“His car seat is next to the couch,” Levi said. Fear was etched into his voice.