Chapter 26
Chris
Iflip off the light in the bathroom and step into the master bedroom.
Lily’s sitting cross-legged on the bed. She’s wearing one of my T-shirts, her damp hair hanging loose over her shoulders.
I’m still reeling from what she told me.
Not because it changes anything, but mostly because it scares me about what could happen to her.
She’s watching me with guarded eyes as I cross the room and join her on the bed. I lay back on the pillows and pat the spot next to me.
“Come here, Lily.”
She crawls the few feet to me and slides under the messy, unmade covers, even though I’m on top of them. “My legs are cold,” she says quietly as she tucks into my side with her head on my shoulder.
Resting my cheek on the top of her head, I murmur, “Tell me what’s going on inside that head of yours.”
Halfway through our shower, I could tell there was a shift in her demeanor.
She was shutting down right in front of me.
I wanted to press her about it, but decided to wait until we were out of the shower to do it.
Instead, I took my time washing every inch of her, whispering every adoring word I could think of.
She sniffles, and I hug her tighter. “I can’t stop thinking about what you must think of me.
I know you said this doesn’t change anything, but how can it not?
How can you ever look at me the same? Especially after what you told me about Tom.
Not to mention, the fact you’re an attorney.
Someone who’s supposed to help uphold the law. ”
My fingers trail up and down her back as I contemplate her question. I understand where she’s coming from and why she’d wonder that. I know I need to find a way to explain it that leaves no doubt in her mind.
“You’re right. This does change things.” Her body stiffens against me. I kiss the top of her head to reassure her before continuing. “But not in the way you think.”
She wraps an arm around me, hugging me back.
“I’ve never admitted this to anyone, but when everything went down with Tom, I went through a very dark time.
I contemplated doing things that most people would be appalled by.
” Mandi doesn’t even know the depravity of my thoughts when I was in the depths of my depression.
Drunk and bitterly angry are never a good mix.
“Have you killed someone?” she asks, sounding pained.
Sighing, I admit, “No, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t think about it.
Monica was one of the kindest people I’ve ever met.
I couldn’t even imagine a world where anyone would hate her enough that they’d want to kill her.
And there was no possibility that this was a random killing.
It was too personal. Too targeted. It just didn’t make sense it would be a stranger. ”
“I still can’t believe that happened,” Lily whispers.
“Sometimes, I still can’t either.” I take a deep breath.
“Then, when Tom was convicted, I lost all hope that doing things the quote-unquote right way was actually the way the world should work. Admittedly, I had always thought there was a very grey line when it came to right and wrong anyway, but after that the line got greyer and greyer.”
She lifts her head so she can look into my eyes. “What do you mean?”
I lick my lips as I tuck hair behind her ear. “Sometimes we have to do things that are…unconventional to make things right in the world. And that’s what you did, baby. And fuck the laws that say you have to be punished for what you did.”
She huffs out a laugh, a tear slipping down her cheek. “What did I do to deserve you?”
Wanting to lighten the mood, I tease, “Kill your husband, apparently.”
Her jaw drops before she smacks my chest and pops up onto her knees. With an incredulous laugh, she scolds, “Chris, I can’t believe you just said that.”
Running a hand up the outside of her thigh, I shrug. “Kind of true.”
Shaking her hand, she tries to push my hand away when I lift my T-shirt high enough to realize she isn’t wearing any underwear. My eyebrows jump as I hum my appreciation. I mumble, “How the hell did I not know you weren’t wearing anything under here?”
“I guess you should learn how to be more observant.”
My eyes flick up to hers to find her smirking down at me. Before she can give me another smart remark, I grip her hips and lift her before dropping her gently onto her back. A giggling gasp leaves her as she bounces on the mattress.
With the movement, her shirt has shifted higher, so it’s around her waist, completely exposing her to me. I move between her legs, gently spreading her thighs apart. I groan as her glorious pussy comes into view.
“You’re so beautiful, Lily.”
Her mouth opens to argue with me, before I silence her with my fingers on her slit, wetness already gathering. Her quick intake of breath follows my fingers toying with her entrance. I slip one inside, and her fists grip the sheet below her.
“I don’t give a shit what happened before I met you, baby. You know why?”
She shakes her head, her eyes hooded as a second finger joins the first.
“Because you’re here with me now. And I made a fuck-ton of money reading people, and you know what I thought about you when I first saw you?”
“What did you think?”
My fingers covered in her arousal move to her clit. I circle it with the perfect amount of pressure and tell her, “Besides being more attracted to you than I have been to any other woman I’ve ever met, I knew that no matter what you did, you did it because you had to. Not because you wanted to.”
She moans and says, “I didn’t want to do it. All I wanted to do was live.”
I remove my fingers, needing to be inside her. I kiss her through her whimper of protest before lining myself up. As I deepen the kiss, Lily raises her hips. I take the silent invitation and slam inside her. Our combined moans fill the cabin.
Pumping my hips, I murmur against her lips, “I’m so fucking glad you did, baby. I needed you to live even before I met you.”
I kiss away the tears that are falling freely from her gorgeous eyes as I bring us both to a shared climax that feels so much more powerful than simple physical release. It’s like a piece of our souls slipping into place within the other, forever binding us together.
Hopefully, the world outside this cabin plays along.