Chapter Eighteen Annabel #2
As I gazed at the image, tears blurred my eyes.
The dam I had so carefully constructed to hold back my emotions broke with the weight of seeing him.
Before I could stop myself, I was sobbing.
When Rev’s arms started to come around me, I pushed him away.
I couldn’t stand his pitying comfort, nor could I afford to allow myself to be held by him.
The safety and protection of his arms had once meant the world to me.
“Why? Why did you come here? Damn you! I’d only just begun to put myself halfway back together again. ”
Rev wore an anguished expression. “I had to come, Annabel. I had to tell you I was sorry for what happened.”
I shook my head furiously. “I don’t want your fucking apology. Your words mean nothing to me. I will never be able to forgive you for turning me away.”
“Even if I came here to make it right?”
After hiccupping a cry, I stared suspiciously at him. “What do you mean?”
“The last four months have been the worst ones of my life. I’ve spent most of them drunk off my ass, trying everything in the world to forget you.
” Tentatively, he reached out to cup my cheek.
Although I should have jerked away from him, I couldn’t bring myself to. “But you’re unforgettable, Annabel.”
Unforgettable. He thought of me as unforgettable.
His words caused the tears to come harder and faster.
Bringing his hands to my waist, Rev drew me against him.
My hands fisted the front of his tux as I clung desperately to him.
“Please don’t cry. You break my heart when you cry, especially when I’m the one at fault,” he murmured, his words warm against my cheek.
“I can’t help it. You’re not the only one whose last four months have been miserable. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t forget you either.”
Rev kissed the top of my head. “I’m so sorry.
I never wanted to do anything to hurt you, but all my fucking good intentions just got in the way.
I’ve never been so wrong about trying to do what I thought was the right thing.
” Easing back from me, Rev stared into my eyes.
“You were right that I freaked out about kissing you that night at the roadhouse. But what you didn’t remember was you also told me you were falling in love with me. ”
I heard myself gasp. “I did?”
“Yes, you did. Although part of me was glad to hear you say it, I was afraid that you were just mixed up in the way you felt about me because of what you had gone through. But more than anything, I didn’t feel I deserved you.”
“How can you think such a thing?”
“How can I not? You’re this beautiful and intelligent woman who is unattainable to someone like me. Your grandfather was the fucking governor while mine worked in a cotton mill.”
“You know that none of that matters to me—pedigree, bloodlines, and all that bullshit. You always knew how I felt about my parents and their world.” I motioned inside at all the grandeur. “This has never been and never will be my world.”
“But you deserve to have the finest things that life has to offer, and I can’t give you that.”
Shaking my head, I countered, “I don’t want any of that. None of that is important to me. I just want what you can give me.”
With a scowl, he said, “All I can give you is a sixty-year-old house and stakes in a pawnshop and gym.”
“You can give me what none of the richest men at this party can.”
“And what’s that?”
“Your love.”
Rev’s blue eyes shone with a fierce intensity. “I do love you, Annabel. I fought it for a long time, but I know now without a shadow of a doubt, that you’re the only woman in the world for me.”
My heart skipped a beat at his declaration. “You really mean that?”
He nodded. “Do you think even after the way I acted that you could love me again?”
I smiled as I brought my hand up to his cheek. I brushed the back of it over his smoothly shaven skin. I couldn’t seem to keep my hands off of him. “I never stopped loving you. No matter how hard I tried or no matter how hard I wanted to.”
Rev’s response to my words was to bring his lips to mine.
Every molecule in my body seemed to come alive as our lips pressed together.
His mouth worked tenderly against my own, almost timidly as if he didn’t want to spook me.
But then I also realized they were the type of kisses you gave someone that you loved.
I pulled away to stare up at him. “Take me away from here.”
“Are you sure?”
“There’s nothing that I want more than to be with you. Your home, your family, and your club is in Georgia.” I smiled. “That’s where I want to be.”
Rev returned my smile. “You don’t know how thankful I am to hear you say that.”
Taking him by the hand, I started to lead him to the stairs. When he tugged on my hand, I stopped. “What?”
“Don’t you need to go pack?”
I shook my head. “I don’t want to waste another minute here when I could be with you. I can send for my things later.” The truth was I didn’t want to ruin this perfect moment by having a verbal altercation with my parents.
Rev laughed. “Whatever you say.”
He hurried down the veranda steps and around the side of the house. “Annabel? Annabel, where are you going?” my bodyguard, Bradley, called out after me. He was breathing a little harder like he had broken into a run to catch up with us.
“I’m going home.”
Bradley’s blond brows furrowed in confusion. “I’m sorry?”
I smiled at Rev before glancing back at Bradley. “You are relieved of your duties. Should my parents ask you can tell them I left willingly with the biker I’m in love with.”
When Bradley started to protest, Rev stepped between us.
“Don’t even bother trying to stop us. It won’t end well for you,” he practically growled.
A shiver went through me at seeing his protective side again.
Even outfitted in a tux, he still harbored the rough, bad boy biker side I’d fallen in love with.
I guess he realized Rev wasn’t worth fighting because Bradley held his hands up and backed slowly away. “You know I’ll have to tell your parents immediately,” he said.
“I understand.”
Glancing between me and Rev, he said, “Be careful.”
“Trust me when I say that no one can protect Annabel better than I can” Rev said.
With a tentative smile, Bradley replied, “I don’t doubt that for a minute.”
Rev took my hand and tugged me forward. When he breezed past the valet, I began to wonder where he had parked. And then I saw a motorcycle down the street. “You rode all the way from Georgia to here?” I asked, as my breath hitched and all the excitement I had possessed exited my body.
“I hadn’t been on a long haul in a while. I thought I could use the time to think.” His brows lined in worry as he stopped walking. “Fuck. I didn’t even think if you would be okay with it. I mean, I didn’t imagine you wanting to talk to me, least of all wanting to come with me.”
“It’s okay.”
The truth was I hadn’t been on a motorcycle since that fateful night with Johnny. When I was with Rev in Georgia, I had been around them, but I had never ridden one. I had been too afraid it might trigger some of my old memories.
And I had been right. Although Rev squeezed my hand reassuringly, I fought an inner battle with my subconscious over the heart-racing, chest heaving anxiety and fear that threatened to overtake me all because of a motorcycle.
Searching my mind, I recalled the words my therapist had given me when I came in contact with an emotional trigger.
You have a choice. You are safe. You are not in danger. You always have a choice.
At what must’ve been my emotional turmoil, Rev said, “Look. You do not have to get on my bike. I can get us a cab to the hotel.”
I was touched and maybe a little tempted by his offer. But considering the man I loved was a biker, I knew this was something I had to conquer. “I’ll be fine.”
Always the gentleman, Rev took off his coat jacket and handed it to me. “Are you sure you want to do this? I wish you had at least stopped for a coat. It’s cold now, but it’s going to be hell once we get started.”
“I’m sure I’ll survive.”
Rev handed me his helmet, and I slid it on. I then tried hiking up the hem of my ball gown as best I could. When Rev chuckled, I wagged a finger at him. “I’d love to see you try to maneuver in this thing.”
“If it’s any consolation, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you more beautiful than you are in that dress.”
I momentarily stopped fidgeting to look up and smile at him. “Thank you.” Once again, Rev showed his caring side with just a small compliment to put me at ease.
Once I had gotten the dress up as best I could, I eased onto the seat of the bike. After I was in place, Rev got on. I brought my hands around his waist and snuggled up against his back. It felt so good to get to hold him again. I had missed the feel of him over the last few months.
While it had been unseasonably warm for December, it might as well have been subzero by how cold I was once we got started.
When we got to the first red light, Rev turned around to survey how I was doing.
I guess my shivering and teeth chattering told him all he needed to know.
“My hotel isn’t far. Hang in there. Okay? ”
“I-I’ll t-try,” I murmured.
Thankfully, it wasn’t too much farther. I was also grateful that Rev had chosen a hotel with rooms inside, rather than a motel like I had been taken to that night with Johnny. When the bike came to a stop, I didn’t want to pry myself away from the small amount of warmth I was getting from Rev.
I whimpered when he got off. After he took my hand, he frowned. “Jesus, Annabel, you’re like a block of ice. Let’s get you inside and warm.”