Chapter 15
GAbrIEL
‘Looks like we’re the first ones in the car again!’ Laila said as she slid onto the back seat of the Mercedes.
I tried and failed not to look at her long, smooth bare legs. She was wearing another beautiful dress and a pair of gold sandals.
She looked like a goddess and I wanted to tell her so, but Laila had said she was not here for romance so I had to respect her boundaries. And that meant not commenting on how sexy I thought she was.
‘Sounds like someone has a competitive streak.’ I smiled, then fastened my seatbelt.
‘I didn’t think I had, but I’m so used to failing that it’s a nice feeling to do well at something for a change. Not that us being first in the car has anything to do with me. Being matched with you has given me an unfair advantage! Have you lived in Paris for long?’
‘Non.’ I shook my head as I thought about why she considered that she was so used to failing. ‘I only moved here recently.’
‘That’s even more impressive! How did you know the answers to all of the clues so quickly then?’
‘So far they have been popular landmarks, so it has not been difficult.’
Laila pulled out her phone.
‘This location is the second-highest point in the city,’ she said, reading out the clue we had received at this morning’s briefing. ‘I still don’t know the answer. But don’t tell me. I want it to be a surprise.’
‘D’accord,’ I confirmed. ‘Why did you say that you were used to failing?’
‘Because it’s true.’ Her shoulders slumped.
‘When I was growing up, I had all of these goals and dreams. I was supposed to travel the world. Failed. I was supposed to go to university. Failed. I dreamed of getting a good job. Failed at that too. And when circumstances meant that my path needed to change because I had Ricky, who by the way I adore and I would do anything for, I was determined to be a great mum. But I don’t think I did a very good job with that either.
So yeah. I know it sounds silly because this is only the second activity and I won’t be here to even have a chance of winning, but it just feels good to not be losing for a change. ’
‘It does not sound silly.’ I went to squeeze her hand to reassure her, but pulled back just in time. ‘But I do think that you are being very hard on yourself. Life rarely follows the path that we plan, but that is all part of the adventure, non?’
‘Adventure is one way of putting it.’ She flashed a half smile.
‘Just because you did not achieve your dream of travelling the world before you became a mother, it does not mean that you have failed. The important thing is that you are doing it now. You are still pursuing your dreams. You are just doing it on a different timeline.’
‘That’s actually a great way of looking at it,’ she nodded.
‘It is never too late to change your job or your life. And as for being a mother, obviously I cannot speak from personal experience—’
‘No?’ Laila cocked her head playfully, then chuckled.
‘Surprisingly not,’ I grinned. ‘But I remember how hard you worked to give Ricky everything. You are a dedicated and committed mother. That is not always the case.’
My voice trailed off as I thought about how different Laila was to my own mother. Although Laila had regrets about the path her life had taken, I knew that she did not regret having her son. She loved Ricky and gave him everything she could.
In contrast, my mother was never very affectionate and sometimes I felt like an inconvenience. Like having me stopped her from having the life that she wanted.
My father always showed me love and made time for me. He would play football with me in the park on a Sunday even when he was tired because it was his only day of rest.
And despite the fact that I could see that he could barely keep his eyes open after working two jobs, he would still read to me before bed.
That is why when my parents divorced, choosing who I wanted to live with was one of the easiest decisions of my life.
‘Thanks,’ Laila said. ‘It doesn’t feel like I’ve done a good job. Trying to get him to call is like getting blood out of a stone.’
‘That is normal. Ricky is a grown man now. You have done your best to teach him right and wrong. Now he wants you to allow him to live his life.’
‘You’re right. He’ll always be my baby though. I’d do anything for him.’
‘I know,’ I said.
‘We are here,’ Daphné’s voice boomed from the speaker.
‘Oh, wow!’ Laila pressed her face against the window like a child who had just spotted Santa Claus for the first time. ‘That’s Sacré-C?ur, right?’
‘Oui.’ I stepped out of the car as Daphné opened Laila’s door.
‘I’ve always wanted to come here!’
At the bottom of the steps, Lisette was there waiting, ready to stamp our Love Passports.
Once we’d had them stamped, I turned to face Laila.
‘There are two hundred and twenty steps,’ I said. ‘Would you like to climb them or take the Funicular?’
‘Climb them!’ Laila said without hesitation. ‘I need to find a way to work off all the good food I’ve been eating. I’ve only been here two days and I swear the size of my bum has already doubled!’ She laughed.
‘There is nothing wrong with…’ I was about to tell her that there was nothing wrong with her bum, but again I held back. To know that would be admitting that I had studied it more than I should have.
Boundaries, Gabriel.
‘If you cannot indulge yourself a little when you are on holiday, then what is the point of life?’ I said diplomatically.
‘Easy for you to say, muscle man!’ she added as we climbed the steps.
I raised my eyebrow.
‘You have been looking at my muscles?’ The corner of my mouth twitched.
‘No… not like…’ She blew out a breath. I wasn’t sure if it was from the exhaustion of climbing the stairs or the frustration that she’d been caught out. ‘They’re hard to miss. I’m sure they could see those muscles back in London! Do you live in the gym?’
‘Non!’ I laughed. ‘But when I commit to something, I give it my all. And I like eating. The more I work out, the less guilty I feel about my pastries obsession.’
‘I hear you. I also suffer from cakeitus, which in case you’re wondering is the very serious medical condition where whenever I’m within a few feet of cake I absolutely have to eat it.’
‘I think that I also suffer from this,’ I laughed. ‘Do you still love eating the Jamaican rum cake?’ I asked.
Laila froze on the step and stared at me, her eyes the size of saucers.
‘You remember that?’ she gasped.
‘Of course.’ I shrugged. ‘I remember many things about you.’
‘Yeah?’ Laila went to take the next step then paused again. ‘Like what?’
A couple got up from one of the green benches on the grass beside the steps and I gestured to Laila for us to sit.
As we sat at opposite ends of the bench, I wondered how I could even begin to answer her question.
There were so many things that I remembered about Laila.
Every detail about her had been seared into my brain.
There was the sweet sound of her laugh.
The way her eyes crinkled in the corners when she smiled.
And how every atom in my body sprang to life when she did.
But instead I decided that it was better than I did not mention that.
‘Do you still like your coffee with a dash of milk and half a teaspoon of sugar? Not three quarters or a third, exactly a half?’
‘How did you…?’ Her jaw dropped. ‘It’s kind of scary how you remember that.’
‘Scary?’ I frowned. ‘For me it is normal to pay attention to important details.’
‘How I take my coffee is hardly important enough for you to remember.’
‘But of course it is.’ My frown deepened. ‘It matters to you, so it should matter to the people that care about you too.’
Her eyes widened.
‘And I remember how you always used to braid your hair after you had washed it,’ I continued. ‘You used to say that washing your hair would take you hours.’
‘Yes!’ Her eyes popped.
‘I like your hair like that,’ I said, admiring her braids. ‘It suits you.’
Earlier I had worried about paying her a compliment but saying that I liked her hair seemed safer than commenting on how sexy I thought she was.
‘Thanks.’ She ran her hands through her long braids self-consciously. ‘It’s easier to manage like this. I didn’t want to spend time styling it every day.’
‘Did you do it yourself?’
‘No. A girl at work recommended a lady who did hair from home. I couldn’t afford to go to a salon. Because it takes several hours, it would’ve cost a fortune.’
‘Several hours?’ My brows shot up to my hairline.
‘Yep! It’s not for the faint-hearted. I always come prepared with a book, snacks and a cushion.’
‘Wow, a cushion too. For your back?’
‘No, more for my bum. After sitting for so long it can get sore.’ Laila winced. ‘Sorry! I don’t know why I even told you that. That’s the second time I’ve mentioned my backside in the last ten minutes and you don’t want to hear about my arse!’
‘What makes you think that?’ I smirked and she laughed.
‘Of course, I am a gentleman so I would not raise the topic myself,’ I added, thinking about how I had held back on commenting on it a few minutes ago.
‘But if you decide that it is something that you would like us to discuss, I would very happily engage.’
‘Have you been looking at my bum, Gabriel?’ She raised an eyebrow.
‘Would you be offended if I told you that I had?’
‘Under the circumstances I should be… but I suppose it would depend. If it was because you thought I needed to get in the gym, I’d rather not know because like I said earlier, I’m already aware that I could tone up more.
But if you were looking because you… never mind.
’ She waved her hand dismissively. ‘Doesn’t matter. ’
‘I can assure you that it was nothing bad. Quite the opposite…’ I held her gaze.
Laila swallowed hard, then jumped off the bench.
‘We should… the views are amazing here, but they must be even better at the top. Let’s carry on walking.’
She quickly returned to the steps and did not wait for me to join her before she continued climbing them.
I knew what she was doing.
Laila was trying to create distance between us because she must have felt what I did.
A spark.
Despite what she had said, I questioned if there was a small part of Laila that was attracted to me.
And if there was, I wondered whether she would ever admit it.