Chapter 44
LAILA
What the hell?
I swallowed hard as I saw Juliette just metres away, frozen on the spot.
Her eyes weren’t just like saucers. They were the size of giant dinner plates.
Clearly she knew about me and Gabriel.
And considering he just had his tongue down my throat, if she didn’t know two minutes ago, she sure as shit knew now.
‘Laila? G-Gabriel?’ she stuttered once she’d walked over to us in a trance, like she couldn’t believe what she’d just seen. ‘Are you…? Did you…? What is going on? Why were you kissing my son?’ Juliette shouted, her nostrils flaring.
‘I’m sorry, Juliette,’ I winced, still trying to get my head around the fact that not only was she here, but that she’d caught us kissing. ‘Gabriel is… Gabriel was who I was matched with. At the hotel,’ I said, my stomach twisting as Juliette’s face contorted in a million different directions.
The silence stretched for what felt like hours, but could only really have been less than a minute.
My heart thudded against my chest as I waited for her reaction.
Hopefully she’d understand, laugh it off and say she was happy that her two favourite people were together.
That was possible, right?
Right?
Oh, God.
With every second that passed, Juliette’s face grew redder.
She was clearly shocked, but also very, very angry.
Any minute now she was going to charge at me, wrestle me to the ground and claw my eyes out.
I needed to explain better.
Let her know that her son actually meant something to me.
That although I regretted hurting her, I didn’t regret us being matched.
At first when we were set up, I thought getting involved with him would be the biggest mistake of my life. But if it was a mistake, it was one of the best I’d ever made.
‘I’m sorry you found out like this,’ I added, ‘but I’m not sorry that I’ve fallen for Gabriel.’
‘Putain!’ Juliette spat.
My French wasn’t the best, but I was pretty sure she just called me a whore.
‘?a suffit!’ Gabriel jumped in.
‘I cannot believe this!’ She glared at me, rage burning in her eyes. ‘After all that I have done for you! I paid for you to go on holiday and you repaid me by fucking my son! My own flesh and blood! How could you?’
The gasps from strangers around us were audible.
‘Maybe we should go somewhere more private to talk,’ I suggested.
Gabriel opened his mouth to defend me again but I spoke before he did.
‘I have expressed my gratitude many times for you paying for this trip. I know that seeing us together must be a shock. Finding out that Gabriel was my match was a shock for me too. I tried to fight our connection because I knew you’d be upset.
But as hard as it may be for you to believe, we’re really great together and I know that we have a future.
I love Gabriel – very much. And I hope that in time you’ll be able to accept that and be happy for us. ’
I looked at Gabriel and he was beaming.
I hadn’t planned to let him know that I loved him in front of his mum, but I needed them both to know that I was serious. It was important that Juliette understood that this wasn’t just a fling for me.
‘Love?’ Juliette frowned. ‘But he wants to start a family! You are too old to give him that!’
Even though I knew one of Juliette’s many objections to our relationship would be that she wouldn’t get grandchildren, hearing her say I was too old to give Gabriel a family still hurt.
‘I told you before. I do not want children,’ Gabriel stated firmly. ‘I only want Laila.’
Juliette’s eyes widened with shock like she’d just been unexpectedly punched in the gut.
‘Is this because…’ Juliette stuttered, ‘did I… did I do this to you? Is that why you do not want them? Because of what I did?’ Her face fell.
‘Oui,’ Gabriel said. ‘I never wanted anyone to experience what I went through.’
‘I am sorry.’ Juliette hung her head. ‘I tried my best, but I was just not good at being a mum. Not like Laila is with Ricky. I just… I was so unhappy with your father. We were not right for each other and I… I should have walked away before I… I know I made mistakes and I paid for them. But I don’t want to lose you, Gabriel.
I hoped that if you had children I could have a second chance to do better this time.
Be a positive influence in their lives. Make right the wrongs that I had made. ’
Tears streamed down Juliette’s perfectly made-up face. Her eyes shone with sadness. Gone was the confident, put-together woman I was used to seeing and in her place was a broken one. And despite the terrible things she’d done in the past, I couldn’t help but feel for her.
‘It is not fair for you to expect me to have children to ease your guilt. That is not the solution. If you really want to have a relationship with me, if you want us to have any hope of building what is broken between us, then you need to start by accepting that Laila and I are in love. We want to be together. If you love me like you say you do and if you value her friendship then you will give us your blessing.’
Juliette looked at me, then Gabriel.
‘You two are really in love?’ She frowned, disbelief and confusion still clouding her features.
‘Oui,’ Gabriel replied without hesitation. ‘She is the only woman I ever wanted.’
‘Head over heels,’ I confirmed. ‘Your son is the most incredible man I’ve ever met and he makes me so happy, Juliette.
You should be so proud of him. Thanks to Gabriel, I’ve discovered how fantastic it feels to be loved and to love someone genuine and kind.
I’ve had a taste of how amazing life can be when you spend it with the right person and I want to enjoy it with Gabriel.
I really believe we have a future together. ’
‘Wow.’ Juliette blinked several times. ‘This is… I… Archibold flew me to Paris yesterday and I remembered that you would be catching the Eurostar to London today so I decided to surprise you so that we could travel back together and you could tell me all about your trip. But I was not expecting this.’ She stayed silent for several beats before speaking again.
‘Of course I want you to be happy, you are my son, and Laila, you are a dear friend. But… this is a lot to take in. I need more time to process this.’
‘Of course,’ I said, relieved that she was considering it and not scratching my eyes out.
‘I really value our friendship. And I’m grateful that you paid for the trip and I promise to pay you back every penny, even if it takes me years to do it.
But I meant what I said. I can’t give Gabriel up.
I don’t want to. I deserve to be happy.’
‘I see. It’s just…’ Juliette shook her head like she was about to say something but decided against it. ‘I will leave now, but I will be in touch.’
After flashing us a weak smile, Juliette headed towards the exit and as she did, a tear rolled down my cheek.
I did it.
A kaleidoscope of emotions flooded through me.
Relief that I’d finally come clean about Gabriel and didn’t have to lie or sneak around any more.
Sadness, because I hated to see Juliette upset.
Empathy, because I understood how difficult it must be for her to process this.
Excitement that now everything was out in the open and Gabriel and I could plan a future together without guilt.
And also hope.
I’d told Juliette about Gabriel and the world was still spinning. It hadn’t ended. And although it was too soon to say for sure, it was possible that she was still my friend.
Everything was going to be okay. I was sure of it.
‘I am so proud of you, mon amour,’ Gabriel smiled then wrapped his arms around me. I’d noticed that he’d started calling me mon amour which I knew meant my love and it made me swoon every time. ‘I know that was not easy, but you did it.’
‘Actually, it was a lot easier than I thought.’ I stood in front of him.
‘Because, like I said out there, I love you. And I’ve realised that when you love someone, everything suddenly makes sense.
Like Jasmine said to me the other day, when you’re in love, you don’t see problems and challenges, just opportunities.
So if telling Juliette the truth and risking our friendship was the price to pay to be with a wonderful man like you, then that’s what I had to do. ’
Saying it like that made it sound so simple. But I supposed once my mindset and perspective shifted it was.
That didn’t mean that the road ahead would be plain sailing, because it wouldn’t. But the point was, whatever we had to face, we’d do it together and I knew that without a shadow of doubt it’d be worth it.
‘So you love me?’ Gabriel grinned.
‘You know I do.’ I rolled my eyes playfully.
‘Pardon. Je comprends pas l’anglais. Tu peux le dire en francais?’
I frowned as I tried to work out what he’d just said.
‘Wait. I’m pretty sure you just said that you don’t speak English and asked me to say it in French?’ I frowned. ‘Ohhh… I see what you’re doing. You want me to say it again, but in French. Talk about milking it!’
His lips turned up at the corners as he tried to stifle a smile.
When I thought of how to say I love you in French, it wasn’t a struggle. The words popped into my head straight away, like it was the most natural thing in the world.
‘Je t’aime,’ I said, wrapping my arms around Gabriel’s waist and looking him straight in the eyes. A smile the size of three oceans spread across his face.
‘Moi aussi, je t’aime, mon amour,’ Gabriel said.
And as he kissed me right there in the middle of the busy station concourse, every concern, every doubt I’d ever had melted away.